Good Morning, World!!! As you can tell by reading this post I am not in the hospital. My therapist and I decided that the hospital would be the last resort if things continue to get worse especially in regards to sleeping. I am grateful I didn’t get hospitalized especially since I finally got some sleep last night. I did not get much sleep nor was it restful but it was sleep. I am happy that I finally got sleep but I am still worried about the increased symptoms of my mental health diagnosis.
One of the issues I am having due to my depression is not showering. I have not taken a shower in a week. In fact it has been exactly a week today since I have taken a shower. I personally think it would be easier for me to take bath but unfortunately I do not have a bathtub. For me a bath is more relaxing than shower but taking a shower is the only option I have since I do not have a bathtub in my apartment. I am more than sure that I stink and I hope to be able to get the motivation to take a shower today.
As you may know I have been reading an extremely good book by Cat Winters called Yesternight. I am really enjoying the book. I am about half way thru the book. I hope to do a book review on the book once I am done with it as I think book reviews are a great way to get an idea on what the book is about and how people liked the book.
I finally received my tax return today via direct deposit to my bank account. It came at a perfect time as I was running low on money. I owe my neighbor and an uncle some money so I am going to pay them back. Sadly, with the new tax laws I did not get as much back as I have in the past despite having more taxes being withheld from pay checks. The new tax laws sure in the hell didn’t help me nor did it help many people I know. I am just glad I got a refund because several of my friends ended up not getting one and owing the IRS which sucks shit.
Since we are discussing money, I would like to remind you about the advertisements on my blog. I have advertisements on my blog to earn some money. The only way I earn money from the advertisements is if it is clicked. Every advertisement that is clicked I earn a cent or two. I do not get paid from the advertisements till I earn one hundred dollars but thankfully each click adds up and is saved for a payout when amount hits one hundred dollars. I am only five dollars shy of the one hundred dollars. So once I get one hundred dollars I will finally get paid so I hope that you my reader will click on the ads so I can make a cent or two. Because every cent gets me that much closer to the one hundred dollar amount to get paid. It will be greatly appreciated if you my reader clicked the ads so I can earn some money.
I do not have much more to say as I do not want to repeat myself as I tend to do. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I have had four days with out sleep and I am tired at fucking hell. Unfortunately, the lack of sleep and the longer I go without sleep the more the symptoms of my mental health diagnosis increases. Increased symptoms are never a good thing.
I see my therapist today and will inform him that being in the hospital might be needed at the moment considering how I have been feeling. The dissociation, lack of sleep, voices that I can only hear are coming back, suicidal thoughts and self harm urges are starting to wear and tare on me. I also have not showered since last Wednesday (March 20th). I would prefer taking a bath over a shower but my apartment doesn’t have a bathtub but I do have a shower. So, basically my hygiene is lacking due to the fact I haven’t showered in about a week. I am hoping he can get me straight into a psych unit verses having to go the route of the Emergency Room.
If I do get hospitalized, I have a couple of people who can take care of my cat, Lil Gertie. Lil Gertie, my cat, is my biggest worry if I get hospitalized as I don’t want her to feel like I abandoned her. I love my cat, Lil Gertie so much. I know that the people who look after Lil Gertie if I am hospitalized will do a good job.
The above picture is a painting that I started and completed last night. I couldn’t sleep despite having taken an Ambien. Not sure what it exactly means but I like the painting. I hope you all enjoy it.
I do not have much to say. If you don’t see any post for a while, it is because I was put on to a psych unit. Most likely a unit without computers for patients to . I hope everyone has a good day. I am taking a backpack full of clothes and books to my therapy appointment just in case I do get hospitalized. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. If you don’t see a post from me it is most likely due to be being hospitalized.
SIDE NOTE: I WILL NOT SELF HARM NOR WILL I ATTEMPT TO DIE BY SUICIDE.THAT IS WHY I AM GOING TO SEE IF MY THERAPIST CAN PUT ME INTO THE HOSPITAL.
Good Evening, World!!! I just finished watching the evening news. There was really nothing good on the evening news but when does the news have good news. It seems like the news is nothing but Politics and depressing news. But then again politics can be depressing. Or at least the last two and half years, politics has been nothing but negative and depressing. More so than ever. I wish the news could share a minimum of two feel good stories each half an hour they are on. But that is just my own personal opinion.
On the plus side, the weather in Seattle hasn’t been as “bad” as the weather people said it would be. It was sunny with some clouds which is good thing because there was suppose to be a “storm” according to the weather people on the news. The weather people really don’t seem to know what they are talking about.
My Anxiety, Depression and PTSD are not relenting and wish the hell I could get a break. My mental health challenges appear to have increased symptoms which suck shit. I haven’t taken a show since Wednesday and that is never a good sign. I just wish I could take a bath because that would be a wee bit easier for me but unfortunately my apartment doesn’t have a bathtub in it. It does have a shower but a nice hot bath would be nice on occasion. I know I need to take a shower but I don’t feel like taking one. I know ultimately I will feel a ton better but I am just too depression to do so.
I think I am going to start reading my book Yesternight by Cat Winters. I think reading it will be quite helpful for me to get out of my own head. I really hope it is a good book like people having been telling me it is. It seems like an interesting book by what I read on the back cover.
I do not have much more to say. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Have a great rest of your Sunday evening. Peace Out, World!!!