Monthly Archives: October 2018

More Monday Moodiness

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is still Monday in my part of the world. I am still dealing the Monday moodiness I wrote about in my last post. I am still dealing with depression, grief and isolation as well as other not so good emotions.

I have been doing things to help me through the rough emotions since my last post. My cat is now back sitting next to me on my chair. She is purring right now and the purring is helping calm me down.

I have also done some art work. I have done some painting. I am painting something for a friend of mine to give as gift to her as she has been of great support to me. I am not finished with the painting and she has no idea I am painting her something. I hope to be able to give it to her by Thanksgiving.

I have also been writing. I have been mainly writing poetry. Poetry that I hope to share with you my reader someday but not today. Writing poetry is quite helpful for me and I wrote a poem for my grandma in regards to dealing with my grandma’s death on Valentine’s Day of this year (2018).

Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope to blog again tomorrow. I hope to inform you how my doctors and therapy appointments go tomorrow. Thank you again for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Monday Moodiness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Right now, I am realizing that I have been moody most of the day. I have been moody for many reasons. My depression is acting up. My grief dealing with my grandma hit me like a tsunami today. Oh yeah and that weather sucks shit.

It doesn’t help things that I have been isolating myself today. Not sure why I am isolating today but I have. I did email my therapist and primary care doctor about the depression, grief and isolation. Both my doctor and therapist reminded me of my appointments with them tomorrow which I know will be quite helpful for me. My therapist also informed that I do have refills for my psych meds as he talked with the “shrink on duty.” So, at least I know I have meds for the next two weeks.

My cat, Lil Gertie, has been of great help to me today. She has been laying by my side on my share or laying on my lap. She even let me hold her for about ten minutes as I paced around my apartment. She usually only lets me hold her for about two to three minutes max. She is an awesome emotional support animal. Right now she is taking some “me time” by sleeping on my bed. Everyone needs some space at times and she has done a very good job with supporting me today so she deserves the “me time.”

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Knowing that I have perfect strangers that care about me and that I am able to help by sharing my story helps me get through tough days like today. I hope everyone has a good rest of your Monday. Enjoy your week with whatever you are doing. Peace Out, World!!!

The Hate & Violence Needs To Stop

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! If you live in the United State I am sure you are well aware of the shooting that killed eleven people at Synagogue in Pittsburgh. All I know is that hate and violence need to fucking stop. I don’t understand why the mass shootings are getting worse.

This time around the mass shooting happened a Synagogue which is considered a hate crime here in the United States. It pisses me off that one particular political party is saying that this shooting wouldn’t have happened if there were armed guards. Unfortunately, I think if there were armed guards at the Synagogue, I think the situation would have turned out much worse.

Have armed guards everywhere is not the solution. Having common sense gun laws (or common sense gun control) is what is needed. But here in America people are so set for the second amendment. I am not a fan of guns for many reasons but I understand having the right to bare arms however we need some form of common sense gun laws to help prevent mass shootings or any shooting for that matter. I’m not saying to my fellow Americans that I want to take away your guns, I am say we need better gun control

The thing that pisses me off even though I haven’t heard anything of this yet, is that in most mass shootings here in America, are blamed on people who have a mental health challenge. I am sorry to say this but the majority of people who have a mental health challenge happen to be the victim of a crime than be the perpetrator of a crime.

What happened yesterday at the Synagogue is a hate crime. A crime that is being encouraged by the current administration. That is why that the elections this year are extremely important. We need to get people in power who don’t encourage violence.

That is why I have voted. Yes, I already got my ballot and voted. It is in the mail as we speak. Voting is our civic duty and anyone who doesn’t vote has absolutely no right to complain about the current political climate or say anything regarding government agencies.

Okay, I think I am off my high horse. I am just pissed off that eleven people got killed at a Synagogue. I am also pissed about the continuous shootings that are happening throughout America and nobody seems to give a shit.

Thank you for reading for my blog. I am sorry for the post being so angry. I just don’t like when people get killed. Again, thank you for reading. It is greatly appreciated that you read my blog. Peace Out, World and lets stop the hate.

Too Early To Be Up On A Saturday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is six o’clock in the morning on Saturday. Fortunately, I fell asleep shortly after I last posted. Unfortunately, I woke up a little too early. I was hoping to sleep in a little.

I think I’ll take this time to make some tea. I’ll have tea while reading the local news paper the Seattle Times. It is probably full of bad news like always but at least it is part of my morning routine.

I don’t have much more to say except of yet another reminder of why I have advertisements on my blog. Each time someone clicks on one of the advertisements on my blog I earn money. Not much money but at least it is something. All I ask of you is that you click on an ad or two once or twice a week. It will help by gifts for my friends and family during the holiday season whichever holiday they may celebrate.

Oh, I need to fix me some breakfast. I am not sure what I am going to have for breakfast but I know it’s not going to be cereal. I think I might fix me some French toast and scrambled eggs. I might even have chocolate milk along with my breakfast.

My cat appears to want some attention so I think I am going to give her the attention. If she wants it, I will give it to her unless of course if its three o’clock in the morning and I am trying to sleep. Paying attention to Lil Gertie, my cat, comes first then breakfast.

I think I am going to get going and pay attention to Lil Gertie. After that I will have breakfast and then have tea while I’ll read the news paper. I hope everyone has a good Saturday. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Two In The Morning Fun

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is two o’clock in the morning and I am unable to sleep. I am unable to sleep because I worked last night and ended up sleeping all day. I wish I could get some form of sleep so I can get back on a regular sleep schedule.

One of things I planned to do tonight went out the window. I was planning on watching movies however I couldn’t. First my internet and WiFi went down and then twenty minutes later my electricity went out so I couldn’t watch movies via DVD or streaming. In fact I now have electricity even though it wasn’t scheduled to be back on till twelve noon.

Not having any electricity made me think on what kind of fun I could have without electricity. So I made me blanket fort and set up my art supplies as well as put in some Wonder Woman comic books and the fantasy book I am reading. I then grabbed my battery operated lanterns and some flashlights. After the fort was built and everything else entered the fort, the fun began.

So, I have been spending most of the night in my fort reliving the good parts of my childhood. I have been painting in my fort and decided to add some collaging to the painting. I think the two genres together is creative, fun and can come out quite interesting.

After doing some art, I decided to read. I read a few chapters in the fantasy novel I am reading and am really getting into it. I also have been reading some Wonder Woman comic books. As I was reading, that is when the electricity came back on. So, now I am blogging about the fun childhood experience I relived.

Think I am going to continue doing what I was doing before the electricity came back on. Not sure why it went off in the first place but I am glad it went out because I had fun and am having fun doing things that remind me of the good parts of my childhood.

Thank you for reading my blog It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope that you all can find something to do that is a fun activity that brings you joy that is from your childhood. Everyone has something that brings them joy from their childhood despite traumatizing childhoods. I hope everyone has a fun weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Friday Evening Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, World!!! After my last post, I went directly to bed. I was so tired it wasn’t even funny. I woke up about an hour ago and had some dinner then I played with my cat. I am honestly worried that I won’t be able to sleep tonight due to the amount of sleep I got today.

Since I have been asleep all, that pretty much sure I will be up most of the night. That is why I am coming up with ways to use my Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) skills. One of those skills I plan on doing is of course some art work. Specifically, I’ll be doing a lot of painting tonight. I might even add some collaging to my paintings.

Another thing I plan on doing tonight is reading. I will be reading the fantasy book I never really finished and decided pick it back up. I am really enjoying the book thus far even I am reading the parts I have read before. I just want to make I don’t miss anything when I get to the parts I have not read yet.

I am also planning on binge watching some movies. Specifically, movies that can be related to the holiday, Halloween. I have idea’s of what movies I am going to choose from but not a definite decision yet. Movies are a great way of distracting myself no matter what it may be.

If you regularly read my blog you are aware that I have advertisements on it. Any time anyone clicks on one of those advertisements I earn money. Not much money but I earn some. It would be greatly appreciated if you could click on an ad or two each week so I can earn extra money.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a wonderful Friday evening. Thank you again for reading my blog. Have a wonderful weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Happy Friday, Morning

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am now home from work and tired as hell. I am so happy that it is Friday. I spent my spare time at work on Facebook and blogging but mostly I was reading and coloring when I wasn’t doing something regarding my job. I work a twelve hour night shift at a homeless shelter for young adults between the ages of 18 to 26.

Anyway, the director of direct services did a shift in the emergency shelter and he came up to check on how I was doing every so often. He observed that I did my work quickly and effectually and still had time to build a rapport with some of the guest of the homeless shelter. He liked the fact that I colored with a couple of individuals and talked about books with a handful of other individuals.  He will be talking with my direct supervisor to discuss with him for me to start a book club and/or art group once a week. I informed him that the book club would be better suited for homeless individuals as it is easier to carry books than art supplies and it is easier to get books donated than art supplies from previous work experience. So it looks like I could have some future at my new employer even though I took the job to get a job as peer once the new year get here because it is easier to get a job if you already have a job.

Now, I think it is time to end this particular post. I am just really too tired to tell you more. Twelve hour night shift are extremely tiring. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great Friday. Most importantly enjoy your weekend even if you work on weekends. I am saying goodnight as I worked all night and am tired as hell. Thank you again for reading. Happy Friday and Peace Out, World!!!

Bored Half Out of My Skull at Work

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is now two o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world and I am both wide awake and sleepy at the same time. I think I am sleepy because I am bored half out of my skull at work. I am wide awake because I have been drinking soda to help me stay awake. If it’s not the caffeine or the sugar that is helping me stay awake, it is the constant having to go pee due to drinking so much soda. I can literally say that my shift is now half over. I only have six more hours to go.

As I sit here typing at my office computer I can hear the rain falling outside. So, it is a good thing that a good portion of our guest decided to come to the shelter tonight as this is one night that would not be pleasant to stay out in. I do have to say that the rainy weather is making me a wee bit tired.

I am wondering what my cat is doing at the moment as she slept most of the day with me. I wonder if she is wondering around my apartment like she did last night when I was keeping myself awake so I could sleep during the day.

I honestly hope the next six hours goes by quickly as I want to go home and curl up with my cat and a good book to read. In fact the rainy weather is having me feel that at the moment. I think after I go to my rounds for my job, I will do some coloring.

Well, I need to be going as I have to check on the guest in the shelter and then I will be coloring till it is time to do my next set of rounds. I hope everyone is able to have a good sleep. Peace Out, World!!!

Getting Ready For First Solo Shift

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I attempted to say awake as long as I could last night so I could sleep a good portion of today.  I went to bed at about three o’clock in the morning and got up when my alarm clock went off at five o’clock this evening.

To tell you the truth I am having some anxiety over my first solo shift. I know that there will be other staff around at the shelter downstairs however I am still having some anxiety over it. This time around I won’t have the luxury of being able to take a nap like I was able to do during my shadowing shifts. Yup, that means I have be awake for the entire twelve hours and hope I am able to make it.

I must admit I am still a little sleepy even thought I slept pretty well. At least I got a good days sleep. I just hope my shift goes by fast and not so slowly. I am bringing things to do when things get slow tonight. I am planning on bringing some art work. Actually, the art I am taking happens to be coloring supplies. I am also taking the fantasy I picked back up and didn’t finish so it is my goal to read a few or so chapters tonight. I also hope I can have time to blog during my shift if I am able to do so.

I think I should finish up this post as I need to finish getting reading for work.  If I don’t blog sometime tonight during my shift I will blog tomorrow about how my shift went. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. You my reader are all awesome. Peace Out, World!!!

Phuck It, I’m Going To Bed

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I attempted to stay up all night but unfortunately I am unable to do so. It is three o’clock in the morning in my neck of the woods and tried to stay up to seven o’clock in the morning. I tried to stay up to seven in the morning my time because I have to be at work at eight o’clock at night and work a twelve hour night shift so if I slept through the day, the twelve hour night shift wouldn’t be so bad.

Things I have done to try to stay up was voting. Washington (State) has an all mail in ballot voting. So, I decided I would vote and now my ballot is in the mail box. I am not going to say who I voted for or what initiatives I voted for but I voted and hope that it counts. Hell, each persons vote counts.

One of the things I also did to try to stay awake is by doing art work. Specifically, I colored. I colored some prisms and mandala’s. It was nice and relaxing.

I also binge watched some television on a couple of streaming sights. It was helpful in keeping me awake but not helpful enough.

I just hope going to bed at three o’clock in the morning doesn’t make my shift at eight o’clock at night a long twelve hour long night shift. I hope I get a good nights or in my case days sleep so my shift doesn’t go by slowly or I don’t get tired. I guess what I am saying is I am really tired. I hope I am able to get enough sleep and not wake up too early for a twelve hour night time work shift. I am probably not making very much sense right now since I am so tired and attempting to stay awake as long as possible so I can make it through twelve hour night shift.

Thank you for reading my blog!!! I am grateful that you read it. Maybe when I have a free moment at work later on tonight I can post cause I know I will have time on my hands. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end. I hope everyone has a good nights sleep and/or good day at work. Peace Out, World and Good Night.