Middle of the Night Rambling

Good Morning, World!!! It’s 2:01 in morning in my corner of the world which is Seattle, Washington. I am sadly not able to sleep and hope I can get some form of rest or preferably sleep. I wanting sleep so I am not a cranky bucket at work. Being a cranky bucket is not fun especially when you have to work. I hope I can get some sleep so I can be the best person I can be when I am at work.

Anyway I have been cuddling with my cat, Billie Dean which helps with relaxing enough to at least help with falling asleep. While cuddling with Billie, my cat, I have been listening to a podcast on philosophy. Specifically, I am listening to Philosophize This. Philosophize This is a great podcast and trying to get to the most recent podcast but I have a long way to go. I am okay with that as it will help have some structure in my life that is enjoyable for me especially since I am learning something everyday from Philosophize This. So, my cat and the podcast will be helping me get some rest tonight.

I don’t have any more to talk about this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. If you wasn’t for you reader I wouldn’t be writer my blog. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!!

A Buttload of Emotions

Hello, World!!! Today, I have had a buttload of emotions. The main emotion that bothered me today was anger. Anger over a training at work. I know why I was angry and it really didn’t have anything to do with the training itself but the trainer. Even though the trainer didn’t do anything negative in the training today, I have had some pretty negative experiences with this person. The negative experiences I had with this person was about fifteen years ago and thought I was over it till I saw this person and realize that I wasn’t over it.

So, when the training was over I did a five minute mindfulness meditation practice. A mindfulness meditation practice that helped a great deal and did two more times before the end of work. All three times I did the mindfulness meditation practice helped a great deal.

After work I called a friend as a well as my grandpa. After talking with both my friend and grandpa on the phone, I visited a neighbor in my building who has become a friend. Talking with friends and family helped a great deal. I felt the love from friends and family and that helped with my anger.

Speaking of love, I felt the love from my cat, Billie Dean. He could tell I was have a challenging time so he sat on my lap. Billie being on my lap also helped my anger. I am so grateful that my cat, Billie, can tell when I am having tough moments like today. He is an amazing kitty and I love him so much.

I do not have anything else to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you my reading I wouldn’t be blogging. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Mini Get Away

Good Afternoon, World!!! Right now, I am currently in Bremerton, Washington. It being Labor Day weekend here in the United States, I decided to come to Bremerton yesterday and I will be going back home to Seattle tomorrow. I decided to take tomorrow off as it is nice to have an extra day off from time to time.

I came to Bremerton because it is a Ferry Boat ride away and feels like it’s far away. I love being able to come to Bremerton for a couple of nights as it is a form of self care for me. It has been a form of self care for me since I made the active decision to be in active mental health and self harm recovery. In fact it was my grandma’s idea and she would pay for a couple of nights in a hotel for me because she knew that being near water and a couple of days away would help me even when I am doing well.

Even though my grandma passed away three and a half years ago, I still come to Bremerton as a way to recharge. In fact, I am really missing my grandma right now. I miss being able to call her up and talk with her. She and my grandpa helped my dad raise me. My grandma was very supportive of me and I am grateful that I am still keeping up with this self care tradition. Most importantly I am grateful that I have a job to be able to pay for the mini get away myself without needing to ask for someone else to pay for it.

Speaking of paying for my trip, my grandpa is taking care of my cat, Billie Dean as I am out of town. Billie is at my grandpa’s getting even more spoiled than he normally is. My grandpa really enjoys taking care of Billie. Billie also loves being spoiled by my grandpa.

Well it is lunch time and I am hungry. So, I am going to end this particular blog post so I can go eat and walk around the Bremerton waterfront. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check-In

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Get meds
  • Clean apartment

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Coffee/Tea with friend
  • Work

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Therapy appointment with therapist
  • Med appointment with psychiatrist nurse practitioner
  • Work

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Ā Dinner with grandpa

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Dinner with a friend

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Dinner by myself at Red Robin

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Clean apartment

A Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Good Morning, World!!! I am having a bad spell of insomnia. I think part of it is because I am in pain due to having kidney stones. Kidney stones is not something I would call as fun or enjoyable.

Since I am not able to sleep, I decided to do something that I find fun and enjoyable. That is listening to a podcast with my cat, Billie Dean, laying next to me in my bed. I am listening to a podcast about philosophy. Specifically, I am listening to Philosophize This. I really like this podcast and am almost caught up to the most recent one of it.

I do not have much more to say as I want to get back to listening to Philosophize This as I lay next to my cat, Billie as he purrs. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. If it wasn’t for you my reader, I would not be writing my blog. Again, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check-In

Good Evening, World!!! I am tired as hell, so I will keep this brief. This week has been a long week or at least that was the case regarding work. Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, it was just a long week.

Despite a long week at work, I ended up in the emergency room yesterday (Friday) evening due to having pain in my right kidney. I thought I had another kidney infection but I do not. I have kidney stones and they hurt like fucking hell but at least it is not another kidney infection.

Even though I didn’t get to bed till midnight last night, I still went for a walk with a friend this morning. It was a good way to get some exercise and catch up with a friend. My friend and I hadn’t hung out since last year before the pandemic so it was to catch up with each other in person.

Not only did I hang out with my friend, I volunteered mid afternoon at PAWS Cat City today. It was nice to be able to volunteer and help cats get new furrever homes. I love volunteering.

I don’t have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you my reader, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration: Day 13: Play With Word Count

Realistically, I do not want to “play with word count.” Not sure why but I don’t maybe it reminds me of math class when I was in school. Math was NOT my strong suite. But I know that is not what this assignment is about. I just don’t feel inspired. I rather talk about social media. But that’s okay as I know I won’t be inspired to write about everything.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 12: Critique a Piece of Work

Today, we are suppose to critique a piece of work which can be artwork, music or writing. It is hard to critique other people work as most of the time other peoples work is better than mine. I critique my own artwork, music and writing all the time. Sadly, the critique becomes self judgement so I try not to critique my own work.

So instead of critiquing, I am going to go on rant. A rant about how people in recovery get stigmatized all the fucking time. People who are in recovery from addiction and/or mental health challenges get stigmatize so much that some people choose to not share their struggles and sadly pass away from their addiction or die by suicide. People can live in long term recovery from addiction as well as mental health challenges. I just wish we weren’t judges so harshly for something that is not are fault. So, before you judge someone due to an addiction and/or mental health challenge think of how you would feel if it was you being judged.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 11: A Cup of Coffee

If we were having coffee right now, I wouldn’t be drinking coffee as I detest the taste of coffee. I may not like the taste of coffee but I love the smell of it. One would think after living in Seattle the last twenty-six years that I would have at least started drinking coffee by now but I just don’t like the taste of it.

I most likely would get tea or hot chocolate if we were “having coffee.” Most of the time it depends on the time of day as well as the time of year if I would choose tea or hot chocolate. Most of the time if it is morning I will choose tea. I usually will drink hot chocolate in the evening. If it is during the holidays I usually will drink hot chocolate even in the morning as it reminds me of some good childhood memories. After the holidays, I go back to morning tea.

I started drinking tea every morning as a teenager because I watched my grandma drink tea every morning. So, it became a morning ritual to drink tea everyday. The only exception is during the Christmas time as hot chocolate and Christmas reminds me of good childhood memories.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 10: Let the Scene Write Itself

I am currently home in my apartment where I can see outside the window as well as able to see my cat and the television. Right now there is major traffic on the five freeway as I live in apartment across the street from the Interstate five highway. Traffic is worse going southbound than it is going northbound. Not sure why but it always seems to be that way even when it is the end of the work day and many people drive north home.

As I am staring out the window I hear some neighbors who are on the patio. I look and it appears that they are talking as the smoke a cigarette. At least they aren’t playing loud music or talking loudly. I hope I just didn’t jinx myself with other neighbors who like to be loud on the patio.

My cat, Billie Dean, just got my attention by meowing. He heard birds from a commercial on the television. He is now meowing at the television looking intently at it. I have to make sure that he doesn’t try to attack my television as it is a flat screen and he is able to knock it over. Oh how I love my cat, Billie.