Sad News About My Cat

Hello, World!!! I realize I haven’t blogged in a while. A great deal has happened since I last blogged. Mostly, I have been attending appointments and doing things for work. Nothing really major except when in comes to my cat, Lil Gertie.

Long story short I noticed a lump on my cats, Lil Gertie side. I took her to the vet and they did a test. It turns out that the test says she has cancer. Sadly, the test shows that Lil Gertie’s cancer is the type of cancer that if the lump is removed then it will most certainly grow back. The vet informed me that there is a slim chance the cancer could be another type of cancer but it is unlikely. She suggested I get a biopsy done on Lil Gertie to see how to proceed with treatment. If the results of biopsy confirm what the test say they type of cancer Lil Gertie has then treatment will be more the quality of life than trying to keeping her alive. The vet thinks Lil Gertie has six to twelve months before needing to put her down.  The vet is amazed that Lil Gertie is “doing so well” because she isn’t acting like she is sick. Lil Gertie, my cat, is acting like her usual self. She is eating, drinking, peeing and pooping normally which is a good sign for both me at the vet. Lil Gertie will have the biopsy in little over a week. I will keep you updated.

The good thing in all this is not only is Lil Gertie acting like her usual self and seeming like she has cancer but I have some major support from my friends. Friends who are amazing and loving. Friends making sure I do some good self care.

The self care I am doing is checking in with friends. I am also burning incense to help me out. I am reading, doing art, spending time with others and going about my normal everyday routine. Most importantly, the best self care is spending time with my cat, Lil Gertie as I know my time is more limited than I thought and hoped it would be. I love my cat, Lil Gertie. I know Lil Gertie loves me unconditionally.

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A face only a parent could love. This is one of my favorite pictures of Lil Gertie. I love her facial expressions.

The above picture is one of my favorite pictures of Lil Gertie. I love the many facial expressions she has especially in the above picture. I am planning on printing out the picture above and framing it put it on my wall in my apartment.

I do not have much more to say as I am now in tears again. At least I know Lil Gertie is not suffering at the moment as she is acting like her normal self. Before I end this post I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Thank you again for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

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First Day of Autumn

Good Afternoon, World!!! Happy first day of autumn. Today, totally feels like an autumn day here in Seattle. Hell, it has been feeling like autumn for most of the month of September here in Seattle. In fact it is going to be one of those days I will stay home and cuddle with my cat especially since I have already done what I needed to do both work wise and errand wise.

Before I continue on what I am going to do for the rest of the day, I want to tell you about my one on one, supervision with my supervisor went. My supervisor and I had a supervision today. We discussed things going on at work. The best part of it was that he is “happy” with my notes and is “impressed” that I asked ways that I could communicate better with the young adults better. My supervisor informed me of various ways and he thinks I do a “pretty good job” with communicating overall.

Now on to what I am going to do on this very fall like weather on the first day of autumn. First and fore most I will be be spending some time with my cat, Lil Gertie. Lil Gertie is my pride on joy and am happy that I adopted her. In fact when I went to adopt a cat, Lil Gertie chose me and when she did, she rescued me. I didn’t really rescue her because I think she does more for me than I do for her. I love my cat, Lil Gertie so very much and it’s hard to think how my life would be different if I didn’t have my cat.

Since the day is a yucky autumn day I am going to stay inside for the reminder of the day. Besides spending it with my cat, I will be reading. I am reading How to Be an Antiracist. Yes, I am still reading because I put it down for about a week so I could focus on finishing up another book for a book club I am a part of. I love to read and am grateful that it is one of my go to things to do for relaxing as well as a DBT skill.

Another thing I will be doing today is art work. Specifically, I will be coloring. I am working on multiple coloring projects. I love to color. Coloring is another thing that is relaxing for me as well as DBT skill I go to a great deal. I hope to share with you with what I am coloring so you can see the progress. Coloring is also a mindfulness exercise for me.

I do not have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great week ahead. Also, enjoy you first day of autumn. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check In

Good Evening, World!!! I have realized that doing a weekly check in with you my reader has helped me a great deal than you. I also realize that doing a weekly check in keeps you up to date on how things are going for me. It also helps with keeping you somewhat interested in continuing to read my blog. Yes, I know it is a bit selfish on my part however I know from experience when I follow a blog and the person doesn’t blog for awhile I tend to loose interest and I don’t want you to loose interest even though it is just about my boring ass life.

Now that I bored you on why I am doing weekly check ins again, let me bore you on what happened in my life this past week. I really didn’t do much this past week. I found myself doing art related stuff. Mainly, I colored and did some painting. I got inspired to do some painting by watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. Granted, I didn’t do anything Bob Ross did and did an abstract painting.

Another thing I mostly did this week was read. I am reading How to Be an Antiracist. I am really enjoy the book. I am learning a great deal. I hope when I am finished with the book that I do a book review on it. I also hope that if I remember to blog at work during a slow moment that I tell you what I have learn thus far from the book.

Something I did this week was attend a writing class I am in. I love the writing class and am learning a great deal about characters and how to build a scene. I am enjoying the class immensely and will be sad when it ends in two weeks.

Sadly, something that didn’t happen this week was Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) group. I was so looking forward to group. Even though it is not easy to do and I have to take responsibility for my actions, I like the group.

The one thing the writing class and DBT group have in common is homework. I enjoy doing “homework” as it helps me build the structure I need for my everyday life as well as my recovery. Sadly, the homework for my writing class will end when the class ends.

Another thing I did was see my therapist. It was a good session. We scheduled an appointment for next week for three o’clock but forgot if it was for Tuesday or Thursday. But it something I can confirm on Monday which is something I will do.

The one thing I have also been doing is applying for new jobs. I really like my current job but it is the hours I don’t like. I am not fond of working a twelve hour night shift but at least it is job and am grateful for it. I just need a job that is not twelve hours and/or at night. In fact I a work tonight. I do enjoy my job.

I do not have much more to check in about. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys their weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Another Friday the 13th Post

Happy Friday the 13th, World!!! I am enjoying my evening but sadly, I do not think I will be able to see the full moon tonight as it is cloudy here in Seattle. Yes, it would be nice to see a full moon on Friday the 13th and the next one isn’t for another thirty years but I remember the last one which is cool thing. The last one happened when I was twenty one and the next one wont happen till I am seventy which I find interesting.

One of the things I have been enjoying is watching the television show The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. Watching Bob Ross is soothing for me to watch. It also inspires me to paint. I wish I could paint as well as Bob Ross and able to paint scenery like him. Maybe I should attempt to paint one of his painting but at this point in time I don’t have want it takes to buy the supplies. I am only able to afford some art supplies but not all.

Beside watching Bob Ross, I have been reading the book How to Be an Antiracist. I only read three chapters today and wish I would have read more. Maybe that is something I can do tonight since I am going to be up tonight so I can sleep tomorrow since I work a twelve hour night shift tomorrow night. I can also read when it is slow at work tomorrow night. I love reading especially something that I can educate myself on and to be a better ally to people.

I do not have much more to blog about at the moment. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday the 13th as well as an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

The Cool Day of Friday the 13th w/a Full Moon

Happy Friday the 13th, World!!! It is Friday the 13th and we are going to have a full moon. I know it is a rarity but I don’t understand why people are so superstitious about it. It is just another day that happens to have moon that is full. I actually tend to have good luck on Friday the 13th but I really don’t put much stock into it being a particular day.

Overall, I am having an okay type of day. Some of my depression symptoms are acting up but not too badly which is a good thing. I haven’t exactly been isolating but I also haven’t been reaching out to people. I have been selectively engaging with some form of human contact. I am doing this just because I don’t want to deal with a lot of drama.

Since I don’t want to deal with drama or a lot of people, I have been spending time with my cat, Lil Gertie. I am loving the fact that she has been extra cuddly today. I think she knows I will be away for more than twelve hours tomorrow night due to work. Either that or she knows my depression symptoms are starting to increase. Whatever her reason, I am grateful for my cats, Lil Gertie’s, unconditional love as well as her being extra cuddly today.

Something I have been doing today is watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. For some reason his show is soothing to me. I wish I could paint the way he paints but that doesn’t matter as just watching him paint as he explains his technique is soothing and a form of self care for me.

I think what I am going to do after blogging, eating dinner and watching the five o’clock news is to read the book “How to Be an Antiracist.” I am learning a great deal from this book and hope to share what I have learned once I am done with the book. Hell, I might tell you what I have learned so far in another blog post.

I do not have much more to say and will in this blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a good Friday the 13th as well as an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings

Hello, World!!! It is the middle of the night here in the Seattle area. Our weather has been interesting the last week. Last Saturday we had a pretty major thunderstorm for our area which I really found pretty cool. In fact we been having some thunderstorms go through the Seattle area again tonight. Not as major or as long as last Saturday but still pretty cool. I think we have had three or four relatively small thunderstorms tonight. I enjoy thunderstorms most of the time. As far as tonight goes, I am enjoying them.

As soothing as thunderstorms are and I am wanting to discuss more soothing things, lets start on something slightly more difficult so we can end on a positive note. I was suppose to have Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Group and sadly it was cancelled. I was disappointed as I was looking forward to it. I was looking forward to it because I was wanting to share a couple of successes I had.

Thankfully, I was able to share my successes with my therapist as I had a therapy session. My therapist is pretty cool and understanding or that is my personal opinion. We also discussed some things that were somewhat difficult to discuss. Another thing we talked about personal goals. I had some difficulty with this because I feel like some of my goals have been put on the back burner and the blame is a hundred percent my fault on that. We talked about how some goals are put on the back burner to be able to focus on other things. It doesn’t been they won’t be put on the front burner again, it just means I needed to adjust some things in my life at the moment. Another thing we discussed was self care and what I have been doing to do good self care. I told him I am back to doing my two daily walks again or at least the ones I schedule. I informed him that I walk once in the morning and then again in the evening. We also discussed other forms of self care that are also inline to my goals which I found quite productive.

As far as self care goes, my cat, Lil Gertie, is a major part of it. Having Lil Gertie around to love as well as to take care of her is a major part of my daily self care. Her unconditional love reminds me to do good self care and is helping me to learn to love myself.

Learning to love myself is just one form of self care that I have made an effort to do along side of other things. Other things such as burning incense. In fact as I am writing this blog I have incense burning. For some reason it helps me calm down and it reduces my anxiety.

In fact my anxiety was really high earlier and one of the things I turned to was to watch a television show on Netflix. A show that helped me a great deal when I was a child and teenager. The show is The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. For some reason I find his show extremely soothing. Add his show with some incense and a thunderstorm is good self care for me. Of course the universe helped with the thunderstorm but Bob Ross and incense was my way of self care tonight.

In fact I think I am going to end this post so I back to watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my perspective. Again, thank you for reading my blog. I hope you have a good Friday the 13th. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Post w/Random Sh*t

Good Afternoon, World!!! It is mostly a typical Monday for me. I, mostly a typical Monday as a couple things today aren’t so typical for me. Both of the things that aren’t that typical involve both of my parents.

Lets start with my mom. Today is her 63rd birthday. A birthday I wasn’t sure was going to happen more times I can count due to her addiction to drugs and alcohol. I feared for her life more of her addiction to drugs than alcohol because that seems to be the thing she goes to when things get too stressful for her. Even though I set some clear boundaries with in regards to talking with her on the phone, I did call her to wish her a happy birthday. She is my mom and I love her. If I were a parent, I would want my kid to make an exception in this case. My mom was happy I called her and thanked me for as well as thanked me for her birthday present.

Now on to my other parent, my dad. As I have informed you in other blog post my dad’s health hasn’t been the best and he is in the hospital. I have good news about my dad and his health. He is getting out of the hospital tomorrow (Tuesday). I am so grateful he is getting out of the hospital tomorrow and that he is in better health.

As much as I love both of my parents, I am beyond grateful that I learned about recovery from both of them. Granted my mom is not in active recovery while my dad is, I still learned about recovery from both of them. If it wasn’t for seeing them in their addiction as a way to deal with symptoms of their mental health challenges it made me acutely aware of how I don’t want to deal with any of my problems including my own mental health challenges. Even though I never had an addiction to drugs or alcohol I did end up having different unhealthy ways of coping with my problems and mental health challenges.

The unhealthy ways of coping are the reason why I learned how to make sure I do good self care. There are many ways I do good self care. One of the ways I do good self care is to take my meds. In fact I have to go pick up my refills today. While I am out and about one of the things I will also do is go buy some incense. I find incense soothing.

In fact one of the things I plan on doing later is to burn incense while I read a book called “How to Be an Antiracist.” I am really enjoying the book. I am learning so much more than I expected regarding race and how to be an ally from this book than I ever realized I could. I hope to learn more as I continue to read this book. In fact have more books about race I am going to be reading. Any way to educate myself about other experience is a way to become a better ally and friend.

I do not have much else to talk about. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Monday. I also hope everyone has a great work week ahead of them. Don’t forget to do good self care. Peace Out, World!!!