Friday Evening Ramblings

Good Evening, World!!! My therapist checked in with me before he left the office for the three day weekend. He reminded me the free music event going on this weekend at the Seattle Center. I plan on going to Folk Life on Monday with my friend from high school.

My anxiety has been acting up so I have been painting. I painted or attempted to paint another picture of Lil Gertie. I am hoping that with practicing that I could get good enough to sell some of my art.

Well I need to go and eat dinner. Have good three day weekend. Have a Happy Friday. Peace Out, World!!!

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DBT Skills Helping Me Through A Rough Moment

Hello, World!!! I am struggling a little right now. I am struggling with anxiety and PTSD. A struggle that I know I can get through. I can get through with the use of my skills. Specifically, DBT skills.

One of those skills is painting. I will be painting to help express the emotions that I am feeling at the moment. Emotions that I have trouble verbalizing out loud or even on paper or computer screen.

Another skill I can do that is helpful to me is mindfulness. Mindfulness helps calm my anxiety right down. Mindfulness also gives me a sense of peace. A peace the Buddhism is giving me as I look into it.

Looking into Buddhism is giving me a faith and hope that I have been searching for. A faith that has been a long time coming.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Sunday Night Random Thoughts

Hello, World!!! I am sitting here at my laptop on what I am going to be posting about. Usually, I have some idea but not so much at the moment. I just hope I don’t offend anyone with whatever come out of my head through my hands onto the post. It is my hope that I don’t say anything offensive.

As many of you know today was the first Mother’s Day without my grandma being around. I painted a picture of what is suppose to look like a yellow rose. My grandma’s favorite flower was the yellow rose. My painting didn’t come out as desired but hey it’s that healing part of creating that was helpful to me.

I also read a book called Why Buddhism is True. I am looking into Buddhism to see if it is the right faith for me especially in regards to my recovery. One of the key principles to recovery is faith even if you consider yourself an atheist it counts. I also read some Buddhist Scriptures as well which gave me some peace.

Thank you for reading. You all are quite awesome or reading my blog. Have a good night. Peace Out, World!!!

Nothing But Random Thoughts

Hello, World!!! I am sitting here just going to blog about whatever the hell is on my mind at the moment. I don’t care what comes out of my fucking mouth right now. I am a little angry for no apparent reason.

I am angry at myself for locking myself out of my apartment. This increased my anxiety. So, I took my Xanax to help me with the anxiety once I was let back in. I had to wait an hour and half before someone could come unlock my door.

Now I am going to read my book about Why Buddhism Is True by Robert Wright. After that I will read my Buddhist Scriptures as this might be of help me to help myself calm down from the anxiety.

Having a spiritual bath is a key part to people’s recovery. I hope this the right path for me especially in regards to my recovery. Plus to help reduce my anger and anxiety without having to take any meds for it.

I think I might be doing some more painting to help me through the anxiety. Painting helps me express all my emotions when I have trouble acknowledging what they are.

Thank you for reading. Have a good Mother’s Day!!! Peace Out, World!!!

Pushing Through the Grief

Hello, World!!! I am doing slightly better than I was in my last post. I went for a walk which helped a great deal. I also read the news paper and had tea. I did this to honor my grandma and have been doing this since before she passed away but today was to honor her.

I also did some painting. I am painting a yellow rose to honor my grandma. My Grandma’s favorite flower was the yellow rose. Painting the yellow rose helps me heal and is a way to honor my grandma.

Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Keeping Busy Through Grief

Hello, World!!! Right now I am dealing with some sadness. Sadness about missing my grandma. I miss greatly miss my grandma. It’s going to be a hard few days for me. Tomorrow is Mother’s Day and Monday is the third month anniversary of my grandma’s death. I wish dealing with grief wasn’t so difficult.

I have been doing multiple things to help me with the grief I have been dealing with. One of the things I have been doing to creating my schedule for next week. Having a regular schedule helps me with my recovery.

Another thing I have been doing is painting. Painting and all forms of art help me express my emotions. The emotions that I can not express in words come through in my art.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Dealing With Grief

Good Morning, World!!! Today, I am getting together with my dad, grandpa and two uncles to celebrate Mother’s Day a day early in memory of my grandma. Tomorrow is going to be a difficult day for my family as well as myself because it is going to be the first Mother’s Day without my grandma.

To help with the grief with this weekend I have a lot planned. Some of what I have planned is as simple as stuff I do everyday. Stuff such as reading Star War: Heir To The Empire or painting or listening to Podcast. Reading and listening helps me forget about the loss for a temporary amount of time. Painting helps me express my emotions.

Thank you for reading. Have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!