At Odds With Myself on How to Help Someone I Graduated High School With

Good Morning, World!!! I am still unable to sleep for some reason. Since I have know idea of why I can’t sleep, I am not going to fret about it. It is most likely, as my psychiatric nurse practitioner says, “treatment resistant insomnia.” Weather it is insomnia or poor sleep hygiene or being off kilter from my job working nights, I can’t sleep.

Since I have not been able to sleep, one of the things I have been doing is scrolling Facebook. As I was scrolling Facebook, someone I went to high school with messaged me privately. This person isn’t exactly a friend but is on my friends list.

Anyway, this friend was born into wealth and finds themselves at odds with their parents. Since they are at odds with their parents and has no job, they are now trying to figure out how to live the life they are use to. I guess their parents have “cut them off” from their trust fund until they are able to live on their own with the help of their parents for two years. My friend really hasn’t held down a job and their parents paid for everything including all their bills. We have been out of high school for twenty plus years and they have not learned how to fend for themselves. This “friend” reached out to me because they know I “know how to live poor” since have lived in poverty most of my life.

I asked my friend if they have a place to stay. My friend said they can stay at their parents place till the end of the year as long as they pay one hundred dollars month for rent and get a job to save up money to get their own place to live. I gave this friend suggestions on the types of jobs they may be able to get during this time and they turned down every suggestion. I also gave them numbers to certain agencies to be able to get food stamps and such. I even offered to go to the nearest DSHS office with them when they open up. My “friend” said “no, it will be an embarrassment if I go near my parents house especially with you.” I informed them out the system worked and that if they want help they need to learn how to deal with the “embarrassment.” This friend stated “I don’t need any freebies. I just need my parents to give me my trust fund money and then I won’t have to depend on the government like you do.” I got upset by this and informed them that as soon as they are ready for my help then don’t hesitate to reach out. I realized that this person just wanted someone to empathize with them and tell them what they want to hear. I have some empathy for this person but I am not going to tell them what they want to hear.

I am at odds with myself as if I should have even offered up my assistance to help this person when they realize what needs to be done to take care of themselves. I am at odds because I can see this as a possible toxic relationship and me carrying the weight of this person. I want to help but I don’t know if this person will ever realize they are responsible for themselves as they have been spoiled their entire lives and taken care of by their parents. I am feeling like I am being judgement of this person and their family and it has me feeling bad about myself. But then again, this person was extremely judgmental for me in high school due to me living in poverty. Anyway, that shouldn’t be the reason I am so judgmental of the person.

I have plenty more to say about the above topic but I am getting angry over the situation and need to stop for now. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you are reading my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has great Tuesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

A Good Sunday So Far

Good Afternoon, World!!! Before I tell you how my Sunday as been I would like to tell you something about my blog. As you can tell, I have advertisements on my blog. Every time some clicks on an ad I get a cent or two from each ad however before getting the money from the ad, I have wait till all the money reaches one hundred dollars before I can receive it. It suck that I have to wait to get the money but I hope that you my reader will click on the advertisements to help me earn some extra money.

Okay now I can tell you how my day went. I got off work and got some sleep. Not much sleep but some sleep. A short sleep because I wanted to go to lunch with my friends. Being about to talk about work with my friends is quite helpful when you are eating lunch. I love being with my friends.

I do not have much more to talk about. I just hope you all have a great Sunday. Thank you from the bottom of my heart fro reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Peace Out, World!!!

A Random Sunday Evening Post

Good Evening, World!!! It is yet another Sunday evening in my corner of the world. I have not really done much today. I am not sure why I have not done much but am grateful that it has been a lazy day for me as it seemed like it was something I needed.

I may have not done much today but I have been productive in little ways today. I did go with a friend who happens to be a neighbor to a local Catholic church to have a free meal. There is Catholic church in my neighborhood that puts on a free meal for homeless and low income people every Sunday afternoon. The cool thing about this meal is that it is not a requirement to go a church service to be able to eat the meal like it is at some other churches around the area. The other cool thing is that this particular Catholic church has been doing this free church for over forty years and there a couple of volunteers that have been volunteering since the church started doing the free meals. In fact many of the volunteers have been volunteering more that twenty years. I think it is extremely cool that people are willing to help low income and homeless individuals. I am grateful to be able to attend this free meal every Sunday with friends who live in my apartment building. This one free meal a week helps me a great deal to save money. Money that I need for other things.

Speaking of money and before I go on to the other semi productive things I have done today, I want to remind you my reader of something. As you might be aware of is that I have advertisements on my blog. Yes, I am well aware of how annoying they are but every time one is clicked on that fully loads I make a cent or two from you just clicking on it. The only way I get paid is when it accumulates to a hundred dollars. I am now on my second round of trying to accumulating one hundred dollars as I finally hit one hundred dollars last month (June). So, it will be highly appreciative if you could click on advertisements so I can make money. I hope to get to another one hundred dollars by the end of November so I can buy holiday presents for family and friends.

Okay, enough with my begging for you to click on to the annoying advertisements for me to earn money and on to what else I have done today. After getting home from the free lunch at the Catholic church I spent the rest of the day doing art and listening to a podcast about philosophy. The type of art I did was coloring a poster for my therapist and painting something for a friend. I listened to a podcast about philosophy because I am really getting into the subject and love learning about it. I am grateful that I am into philosophy and learning about it as do my art work. Being able to learn as I do something creative is always a good thing for me even if some don’t consider it as being productive.

I do not have much more to say without repeating myself so I am going to end this blog post. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things. Again, I want to thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys the rest of their Sunday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

A Sort of Lazy Type of Day

Good Afternoon, World!!! It has been one of those days that I have not really done much. It has been one of those days that I have been lazy and sitting on my ass. I haven’t exactly been “lazy” because I have done some shit. I started working on my resignation letter for my current employer but haven’t completed it for not finding the right words to put into it. Besides working on my resignation letter, I have also put in a handful of resume’s for jobs that would better for me to work.

One thing I have also been doing is art work. I have been painting and am almost done with one. One that I hope to give to someone but not sure who yet. Another form of art I have also been doing coloring. I love to color and is a form of mindfulness for me.

Since coloring is a mindfulness action for me, I have also done other mindfulness techniques. Mindfulness is quite helpful for me especially for my anxiety and PTSD. I highly recommend doing it at least twice a day.

Before, I end this post, I would like remind you all about the advertisements on my blog. The advertisements are a way for me to earn some money. The only way I am able to earn that money is if you click on the ad. The only way I can collect the money is once the money is at $100. I only earn a cent or two per advertisement and hope that you my reader will do that for me so I can reach the one hundred dollars. I only need to reach two more dollars for it to reach one hundred dollars so I can collect the money. Please to this as a favor me. It would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless in Seattle No More

Good Morning, World!!! As you can tell by reading this post I am not in the hospital. My therapist and I decided that the hospital would be the last resort if things continue to get worse especially in regards to sleeping. I am grateful I didn’t get hospitalized especially since I finally got some sleep last night. I did not get much sleep nor was it restful but it was sleep. I am happy that I finally got sleep but I am still worried about the increased symptoms of my mental health diagnosis.

One of the issues I am having due to my depression is not showering. I have not taken a shower in a week. In fact it has been exactly a week today since I have taken a shower. I personally think it would be easier for me to take bath but unfortunately I do not have a bathtub. For me a bath is more relaxing than shower but taking a shower is the only option I have since I do not have a bathtub in my apartment. I am more than sure that I stink and I hope to be able to get the motivation to take a shower today.

As you may know I have been reading an extremely good book by Cat Winters called Yesternight. I am really enjoying the book. I am about half way thru the book. I hope to do a book review on the book once I am done with it as I think book reviews are a great way to get an idea on what the book is about and how people liked the book.

I finally received my tax return today via direct deposit to my bank account. It came at a perfect time as I was running low on money. I owe my neighbor and an uncle some money so I am going to pay them back. Sadly, with the new tax laws I did not get as much back as I have in the past despite having more taxes being withheld from pay checks. The new tax laws sure in the hell didn’t help me nor did it help many people I know. I am just glad I got a refund because several of my friends ended up not getting one and owing the IRS which sucks shit.

Since we are discussing money, I would like to remind you about the advertisements on my blog. I have advertisements on my blog to earn some money. The only way I earn money from the advertisements is if it is clicked. Every advertisement that is clicked I earn a cent or two. I do not get paid from the advertisements till I earn one hundred dollars but thankfully each click adds up and is saved for a payout when amount hits one hundred dollars. I am only five dollars shy of the one hundred dollars. So once I get one hundred dollars I will finally get paid so I hope that you my reader will click on the ads so I can make a cent or two. Because every cent gets me that much closer to the one hundred dollar amount to get paid. It will be greatly appreciated if you my reader clicked the ads so I can earn some money.

I do not have much more to say as I do not want to repeat myself as I tend to do. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!

Still Working on My Creative DBT Skills

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am needing to take a break from both writing poetry and painting. Mainly, I am needing to take a break from the painting as I am waiting for the paint to dry so I can continue working on the painting once it dries. I am still not sure where the painting to going to be but so far it appears to be quite interesting.

Writing my poetry is coming as easy as I thought it would be. I thought I would have a written at least two poems by now but I only have one written. I am however going to be looking at some photos to help me get some inspiration to continue to write some poems.

Writing and painting appear to be helping with my PTSD and Depression symptoms which is a great thing. I am glad I went with my creative DBT skills as I knew they would be the most helpful today. I hope that maybe in a later post that I can share my painting and/or poem(s).

I just want to remind everybody who reads my blog that I have advertisements on my blog. I have advertisements on my blog to help me earn some extra money. The only way I can earn money from the advertisements is if people click on them. I only earn a cent or two per advertisement that is clicked. I, unfortunately don’t get paid till all the combined clicks adds up to one hundred dollars. Sadly, I am only at ninety dollars and am only ten dollars away from receiving the money. I am hoping that you can click on the advertisements so I can get to the one hundred dollars. I wish each click wasn’t only a cent or two but each click is helpful. I would be greatly appreciative if you could click on an ad or two every time you read my blog. .

I don’t have much more to say. I want to thank you for reading my blog as I greatly appreciated it. I hope everyone has a great Saturday. Enjoy your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Beating My Depression

Good Evening, World!!! I am pretty sure that many people have heard the news of Luke Perry passing away due to a massive stroke. This saddens me as I remember watching 90210 as a tween turning into a teenager. Yes, Luke Perry was attractive but he wasn’t the one I had a crush on in the show but I did act like I had a crush on him to fit in with my friends. It is sad that Luke Perry is dead at the age of 52. It is just another reminder on how short life really is.

Now on to other stuff that isn’t as depressing as Luke Perry passing away. Anyway, I did some adulting today. Adulting that is much needed this time of month. That is paying my bills. Nobody that I know enjoys paying bills. I know I don’t like paying them but it is part of being an adult. Another part of me adulting today was to pick up my weekly psych meds. I wish I didn’t need to take meds for my mental health challenges but they are a necessary evil for me as if I don’t take them, my symptoms are that much more unbearable and challenging to deal with.

Today’s weather in Seattle was absolutely beautiful. Chilly but beautiful. I ended up taking a three mile walk after doing my adulting for the day. It was yet another much needed walk. The walk in the sunny weather was quite helpful for me. Getting the much needed Vitamin D was an added plus during my walk as it is usually dreary and drizzly this time of year in Seattle.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated on my end of things. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!