Monthly Archives: August 2016

Once Again, I’m On My Oh So Lovely Soap Box

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!! It’s another relaxing Sunday afternoon in my neck of the woods. As I was sitting on my couch relaxing, I was thinking about the many types of discrimination a person can experience. One of which is economical class discrimination.

There isn’t a day that I don’t think about economical class and discrimination especially when it comes discrimination toward low income individuals. I think about this daily for many reasons. One of which, is I recently experienced it recently, again.

Let me explain my most recent experience in economical class discrimination. I had to call the fine folks who run the city bus system to see where the bus was due to the fact that it had not arrived yet. I called on my basic touch phone which appears to be a smart phone but isn’t. When the fine folks on the other end finally picked up I had an extremely irritating conversation. The woman on the other end mentioned about getting the one bus away app. I had informed her that not everyone has the luxury of owning a smart phone due to finance’s. (This is the point in the conversation that gets quite infuriating.) The woman on the other end informed me that I needed to “learn how to budget.” The thought going through my head was; excuse me, I just didn’t fucking hear that or did I. End stead of say this, I asked for the supervisor and her response was, “I am the supervisor.” At this point, I hung up due to the fact I chose not to get on my soap box with this individual because it appeared from my end she would not be able to grasp it the idea of what she just did was a form of discrimination against low income individuals such as myself. I, of course made an official complaint and much to my surprise it was taken care of.

Like I said earlier in this post that there is not a day where I don’t think about economical class and the discrimination one deals with when they are low income. The reason being is because I live in a subsidized housing building and work at a mental health agency that primarily deals with individuals that are homeless or formally homeless. It’s difficult for me to not, not see the disparity in being low income. It’s irritating as hell when I hear comments such as “you need to learn how to  budget” or “get a job” or “you’re not disabled so you shouldn’t be receiving disability” and so on. I can go on with all of the comments I have heard said to me or the clients I serve. I guess, I am just attempting to point out that when people discriminate against those who are low income they are discriminating against the following: people of color, people other ethnicities, elderly, immigrants, LGBTQ, gender, those with a criminal background and the disabled (which includes those of us who struggle with a mental illness). (SIDE NOTE: I realize I may have missed other minority groups that are affected in low income and I apologize if I missed yours.) Discrimination of those who are low income means you are discriminating against them in another category as well.

As you can tell I get passionate about others being discriminated against. What people don’t realize is that being discriminated against because of your economical class is a very real issue and wish it was brought up more. I know its on the low end of the totem pole of issues that need to be brought up in whole grand scheme of things when it comes to discrimination but that is what I am brining it up in my blog. I am hoping that this entry can at least start a conversation about the topic.

I appreciate you reading my blog and hope that this entry does start a conversation. All I ask is that if you comment on this post that you are respectful. If I feel like you are not being respectful, I will not approve them. My blog, my rules. I just want the conversation to be started. Peace Out!!

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! It’s been a couple of weeks since I last blogged. I know, I have said, this before, I want to blog more regularly. I enjoy blogging.

Enough about me talking about blogging and on to my weekly check-in. Let’s start with earlier this week. I was struggling with fleeting suicidal thoughts with no plans. It’s also commonly known in the mental health field as “passive suicide ideation.” Before I continue, I want to make myself clear, I am NOT currently suicidal and I did NOT harm myself in any way. I was able to use my good ole Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) skills as well as using my support system. It is always nice to have people to depend on especially since that wasn’t always the case for me. It is a wee bit concerning both my support system and myself that I had fleeting suicidal thoughts however everyone agrees that I am not letting it get me down because I am choosing to pick myself up and dusting myself off.  I’ve been able to do this for the fact of being in a relatively decent place. I owe being in a decent place to me working fulltime.

Speaking of work, lets talk about my high light of the week. Yesterday (Friday, 8/26/2016), was our recovery celebration for clients at work. Seeing clients facial expressions as they received their certificates and hearing the speeches of those who chose to speak was not only rewarding but humbling. Witnessing the progress of the clients I am able to serve has been an absolute honor for me to watch.

As, I finish  the post, I want to sum up the week with its been recovery focused. As always, thank you for reading. Its much appreciated from my end. Peace out, everyone!!

Sleepless In Seattle, Once Again

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!! Normally, I would be getting ready for a job I love with a passion however I am not going into work this morning. I am not feeling well. Mainly because I didn’t sleep all that well last night. My insomnia was not helping so much. To make it worse every time I did attempt to fall asleep, my PTSD would rear its ugly head with flashbacks, nightmares and body memories. Too make things worse is I had nightmares about the miscarriages I had. Nightmares that included four faceless babies saying they miss me and love me and then tell me I killed them. Its difficult to sleep after that. I wish my depression symptoms from the grief of losing two sets of twins is setting in once again. Plus the normal PTSD shit that doesn’t help matters much with the nightmares of being abused. Anyway due to the lack of sleep due to grieving over my two miscarriages as well as PTSD shit from my childhood, I have decided to call into work sick today. A job I love with a passion.

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World. I have decided to start doing my weekly check-ins once again and for a multitude of reasons. One of which to keep you the reader up to date on what is going  in the my life and two, to get back in the swing of things of blogging. I have found that if I blog on the regular basis, it keeps my regular readers to want to check-out my blog more often. I have many other reasons why I am stating my weekly check-ins however I am not going to bore you with those reasons.

A great deal has happened this past week so lets just start on Monday since nothing really notable happened Sunday. Monday, I saw my therapist, Diana. Overall, my session with her went well. It went much better than the last session I had with which was back in June. In fact Diana stated that I made “progress” in our session. If I look back on our session I did make some progress. It was an emotionally difficult session with Diana am grateful that I made progress. We discussed some difficult topics that I usually quickly change the subject on and this time I didn’t change the topic which is one of the successes I had in my session.

The success I had in my session with Diana is a major deal but the success I was able to show someone else on Tuesday and Wednesday validated all the work I have done in my recovery. I attended a two day conference on focusing on peers specialist and supportive employment and how the two can interact with each other. So, I ran into another professional at this conference who knew me at my worst. A person who didn’t think I was capable of ever working due to the “severity” of my symptoms at the time.  This person was “shocked as hell” that I was in attendance as well as working as a peer specialist. It felt good being able to prove to someone that I am capable of doing something that they thought I was unable to do. The interaction I had with this person helped me realize that I am a success and how much I am proud of myself for accomplishing.

On the topic accomplishments I have been following the Summer Olympics. Now, the individuals participating in the Olympics have had major accomplishments in their lives to just be able to make it to the Olympics. Yes, many of the Olympians have had difficulties in their lives and you can compare to just about any thing in life. The one thing I am highly disappointed in is that a soccer play on the U.S.A’s woman soccer team was a sore looser and unsportsmanlike. This soccer player made her country (which is my country) look like they are sore losers. Just know we as Americans don’t approve of such unsportsmanlike behavior. The Olympics are suppose to bring the world together and hope that it continue to do so.

The correlation I can see between the Olympics and mental health recovery is hope. And that’s what I want to end this post today with a message hope.  We all need hope! Peace Out!!

Why Can’t I Just Find The Time?

Posted on by Gertie

Long time no write. I don’t know why I am going weeks without blogging especially when I have stated very clearly my plans to blog. I love blogging. It is something I enjoy doing. Actually, it is something I love doing and brings me a sense of joy and accomplishment even when I am having difficulties with my mental health symptoms acting up.

Since I got on the topic of my mental health, let me up date you on it before getting back on the topic of blogging. Overall, my mental health has been doing well. My anxiety has been high and I will be talking to Diana, my therapist about it the next time I see her. In fact I think my job is helping a great deal with the symptoms of my mental illness despite not being able to see my therapist as often as I would like to or need to. I will be discussing the topic of being able to ask for time off to Diana the next time I see her because my recovery depends on it. In fact my job depends on me being in recovery.

Now that we have gotten even more off topic of talking about my mental health and recovery and how it ties into my job lets talk about my job. I love my job more and more everyday. The Department of Health finally made my Agency Affiliated Counselor Registration active which is something my boss has been getting on me about even though I had done everything I needed to do on my end. Now, I am working on my drivers license for work. I had failed my first drivers test this past Thursday. I just need more practice driving and will retake it again. I know when I inform my supervisor of failing the drivers test he wont be very happy but at least I am attempting to get my license. Like I said, I love my job. My job gives me a purpose in life.

A purpose in life just like blogging does. I am thinking that I need to set some time aside to blog. A benefit to blogging, I didn’t realize was going to happen was that it is a form of therapy for me. It’s therapeutic for me and its an added bonus for me because, it wasn’t my intention for my blog to do that for me. I really think if I go back to doing the weekly writing prompts I told you about as well as the weekly check-ins, it will help me get back in the swing of things when it comes to blogging. I am hoping that you all will hold me accountable to this. I’m also thinking about maybe signing up for a Blogging U. course that WordPress puts on even if its one that I have already taken and completed. The Blogging U. thing is just an idea at the moment. I just don’t want to put too much on my plate at the moment especially with blogging. I’m hoping I will come up with schedule with my blog and will inform you of it when I do.

It was nice to be able to blog about how things are going, well sort of. I hope to update you more on how my life is going in all aspect of my life. I hope everyone has an awesome evening and Peace Out all!!