Yet, Another Post About my Depression

Good Afternoon, World!!! It is two days shy of a month since I last blogged. I do not have an excuse of why I haven’t blogged in nearly a month. Or at least an excuse that I feel okay with because there isn’t an excuse good enough for why I haven’t blogged.

Right now my depression is acting up. I am wondering if the increased depression is due to the time of year or due to Covid-19 or due to the up coming elections here in the United States or all of the above. No matter the reason the why I am dealing with increased depression symptoms at least I am aware of it and that it is currently a mild case for me. I know I shouldn’t be dismissive of my depression symptoms as being “mild,” its just that they could be much, much worse.

As far as trying to make myself feel better, spending time with my cat, Billie Dean is quite helpful. Billie is very much a cuddly cat and loves to spend as much time as he can on my lap. I love Billie so much and am grateful for his unconditional love. The love of an animal is the best feeling in the world.

Another way, I am going to do to help with the depression is to read. I most likely will read the fantasy/science fiction book that I am currently reading. Reading helps me cope with my reality. It helps me forget my reality for an hour or two at time without doing harm to myself.

I do not have much more to say as I want to go read. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. I am greatly appreciative that you have chosen to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Good Morning, World!!! It is almost one o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world of Seattle. I am unable to sleep due to insomnia and it fucking sucks. As much as having insomnia suck, there is a plus side to it at times and tonight is one of those times.

Tonight is one of those times because I get to catch up on a couple of things as my cat, Billie Dean, lays in my lap. Billie is happy as a clam when he is able to be in my lap. Or at least it appears that way to me. I love my cat, Billie so very much.

As Billie, happily lays in my lap I have been catching up on my reading. Specifically, I have been reading Star Wars, Heir to the Empire by Timothy Zahn. Tonight I have read the first five chapters and am about to start chapter six. Actually, I am debating if I should start chapter six tonight as I am really getting into the book. When I get into a book, I tend to read as much as I can before getting too exhausted to where I am not able to function and really need to get some sleep. Not only to I not sleep, I forget to eat when I am really into a book.

Since I am really, getting into Star Wars, Heir to the Empire and am needing to stop reading for the night, I am going to listen to a podcast. A podcast about philosophy. Specifically, I will be listening to Philosophize This as I want to be able to get caught up to present day episode. I really like how Stephen West presents the topic of philosophy which is part of the reason why I really like the podcast. I am learning stuff I wish they would have taught in high school especially since I have not had the luxury to attend college.

Now that you know what I have done tonight and what I am going to do next, I am going to end this particular blog post for now. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I really hope everyone is having a good nights sleep and hope you have a great Tuesday ahead when you wake up. Peace Out, World!!!

Yucky Weather Fits My Mood

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I am dealing with increased depression symptoms. I am not a big fan of my symptoms increasing but at least the weather reflects my current mood of depressed. Depression sucks no matter the time of year but it feels easier to deal with when the weather is yucky outside.

Having depression sucks shit but at least I trying to do something to improve it even in the slightest. One of the things I am doing is cuddling up in my new Wonder Woman fleece blanket that I ordered on Amazon. It came yesterday (Wednesday) which was a day early. I am so grateful that it came early as it has been quite helpful with soothing me.

Something else that has been helpful is my cat, Billie Dean. Billie has been cuddling with me and my new Wonder Woman blanket. At this point in time, it is hard to figure out who likes the blanket more, me or Billie. I am beyond grateful that Billie knows when I need some extra cuddles. I love Billie so much and am glad he is in my life.

Another thing that I have been doing to help combat my depression and the gloominess is reading. I am currently reading a fantasy book that a friend suggested I read. I am enjoying the book so far. I enjoy reading fantasy and science fiction genre books. It helps me get out of my own head.

I think I will get going and end this particular blog post so I can get back to reading. I would like to thank all of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my perspective that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great night. Peace Out, World!!!

Excited as Hell

Good Evening, World!!! I realize it has been awhile since I last blogged. A lot has happened and will attempt to catch you up in another blog post as this post is about something I am way excited for.

Every year for the last five years there has been a conference specifically for folks who are Peer Specialist aka Peer Counselors. This year is the fifth annual Peer Pathways Conference in Washington (State). I have been attending since the second annual Peer Pathways Conference. In fact I have been volunteering every year I have attending including this year. The only difference about this conference versus previous years is that it is all virtual due to the pandemic. Anyway, I am looking forward to the conference.

I am looking forward to the conference more so this year as one of the people who has inspired me will be one of the keynote speakers. That person is Elyn Saks the author of The Center Cannot Hold. A friend of mine suggested to me about eight to ten years ago to read the book and I did. Since after reading Elyn Saks memoir she has been an inspiration to me ever since. I am so excited. I am looking forward to it.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great week ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

Been Exposed & Under Self Quarantine

Good Morning, World!!! It has been a few weeks since I last blogged. There are multiple reasons why I have blogged as well as many excuses but neither the reason or excuse really matter at this moment in time. Or at least they don’t matter to me at the moment.

A lot has happened in the last week alone. I found out last Thursday (July 16th) that I was exposed to Covid-19 the last time I worked which was on Saturday, July 11th. A client of the homeless shelter I work at test positive and am grateful that this person is now at a quarantine site here in the Seattle area.

Anyway since I was exposed, I am under self quarantine and am getting tested later on today (Monday). I made the appointment to get tested right after finding out I was exposed. Another good thing regarding all this is that I had already had a virtual appointment with my doctor made for this past Friday (July 17th) which made it easy for me to talk to my doctor about what to expect regarding the test. She also informed me that she didn’t want me to go work on Saturday (July 18th) till I get tested and the results come back as negative. I informed her that my employer was being very insistent with me going into work to do my regular shift. She and I discussed that if I get fired over going against doctors orders in the midst of a pandemic will make my employer “look bad and is grounds for a lawsuit.” I am just grateful that she has my back and wrote me a note for work. She also advised me to self quarantine which is a no brainer.

Since I am under quarantine till I get tested and the results, I will be spending a lot of time at home. At least I will have my cat, Billie Dean with me. I am so happy that I have Billie especially right now. My doctor and I came up with a plan on things I can do to make sure my mental health doesn’t decline while in self quarantine. We discussed a great deal about my cat Billie Dean and how he will be helpful. I told my doctor that I have plenty of art projects I can do especially in the coloring and collaging genres. I also informed her that I have a lot of reading to catch up on. This brought up the topic of our love of reading and the books I am hoping to read. I also mentioned that I have movies I want to watch and she even suggested some that I might be interested in. We discussed music as well. Specifically we discussed me not playing my flute or harmonica just in case I am positive. This will be challenging for me to do as playing one of my musical instruments especially my flute has been a life saver for me when things get challenging for me. We did discuss that listening to music is an option and will be used. We also discussed me keeping in touch with my therapist and that she will reach out to my therapist and I informed her that I already did which she wasn’t surprised about.

Anyway, my therapist to get back to me this past Friday after talking with my doctor. He was grateful that she and I, both reached out to him regarding me being exposed. We basically discussed similar things my doctor and I talked about regarding keeping myself busy. The last thing he and my doctor want is my mental health to decline while in self quarantine and I don’t blame them. I am worried as well. I am also grateful that we will be doing daily check-ins till I get my test results back. If they come back negative then the daily check-ins will discontinue and I hope my test results will come back negative.

Anyway, I don’t have much more to say. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. I hope everyone has a great Monday ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s 5:00 In the Morning & Time for Bed

Good Morning, World!!! It is five in the morning in my corner of the world and time for me to go to bed to sleep the day away. I sleep the day away on Saturdays because I work twelve plus hours on Saturday nights. I am looking forward to going to bed and curly up with my cat Billie Dean at my side.

Speaking of my cat Billie Dean, he hasn’t really left my side tonight. He was curled up on my lap all night long. He was curled up on my lap no matter if I was reading or watching movies. Billie has a calming affect on me which helps a great deal with my anxiety.

Another thing that helps with my anxiety is reading. Just like I said in my last post, I read. I read for about an hour. Of course Billie was curled up on my lap sleeping. I read Dragonsong by Anne McCaffey. I am really enjoying the book a great deal. I hope after I am done reading it, that I will do a book review on it. I love to read a great deal.

After reading for about an hour, I watched movies. Movies help me to escape reality for a few hours. Sometimes escaping reality is a good thing as it helps deal with stress. I watched The Princess Bride and Free Willy. I really enjoy both movies as they remind me of positive childhood memories. Good childhood memories are a rare thing for me so I hold on to them like they are gold.

I am needing to end this particular blog post because it is time for me to go to bed and get some sleep. I want to thank all of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you all read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has an awesome Saturday as well as a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Two in the Morning Post

Good Morning, World!!! It is nine minutes after two in the morning in my corner of the world. After working on some are for almost an hour and a half, I decided to make me some food. I made me some spaghetti with homemade spaghetti sauce I made awhile back and froze. I froze the sauce because I live alone and always make too much. Anyway reheated the homemade sauce to put on my noodles. To go with my spaghetti, I made garlic bread. I love garlic.

After I am done writing this blog, I am going read the book I am reading. It is a science fiction book called Dragonsong by Anne McCaffrey. So far I am really enjoying the book. I am going to be starting chapter five and look forward to what is to come in the book. In fact this book is the first in a series. Actually it is the first in a trilogy. I love book series for a number of reasons. One of which is I tend to get immersed in the story and with the characters so much that I hate to say goodbye. I know that sound silly but it is true.

I, of course will be reading and Billie Dean, my cat most likely will be curled up on my lap. I really enjoy the fact that Billie is a lap cat. Billie is such a cuddle bug and I appreciate it. With Billie, my cat, being such a cuddle bug, it has gotten me to slow down and be in the current moment.

I am hoping to stay awake till at least five in morning. I really do wish I could go to sleep now but I cannot. I cannot because I work a twelve and a half hour night shift on Saturday nights. That means I need to sleep during the day on Saturdays. I wish my shifts weren’t at night because it messes with my sleep schedule and I already have difficulties with my sleep as it is. Even though I don’t like night shifts due to the sleep thing, I am grateful that I have a job that I enjoy for the most part.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has an awesome Saturday as well as a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Feeling So Much Better

Hello, World!!! I am feeling better that I was than my last two post. I spent time with family. Actually, I spent time with my grandpa and uncle as I did laundry at their place. It is always great to spend time with my family. I love my grandpa so much.

After spending time at my grandpa’s, I came home and spent time with my cat, Billie Dean. While spending time with Billie in my lap I read. I am reading a science fiction book. So far so good. I am only on the third chapter but I like thus far.

As I was reading one of my neighbors who has become a good friend asked me if I wanted to go to their place to play some card games. So, I went to her place and we played cards for a couple of hours. I had a great time. I really enjoy spending time with friends.

I do no have much more to talk about in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have an awesome weekend ahead of you. Peace Out, World.

Still Gloomy but Hopeful

Good Afternoon, World!!! My depression is still acting up a little bit. Wish it wasn’t but it is something that I have dealt with for as long as I can remember. The gloomy weather isn’t helping much but it also makes me feel slightly better knowing the weather fits my mood.

Even though my mood is still low, I am hopeful. Even in my last post I was hopeful but now I am even more hopeful. I am at my grandpa’s spending time with him and doing my laundry. I am grateful for my family especially my grandpa. Not very many 40+ year olds still have a grandparent left which is why I am extremely grateful to have my grandpa in my life.

Another reason why I am feeling hopeful is that I have a job interview next week at a local mental health agency for a peer specialist position. The peer position is for supportive housing and thankfully I have experience working in supportive housing as well as a peer. I am hopeful that I could be on the short list but I wouldn’t be surprised if I don’t get the job. The reason being is that the job is at the mental health agency I am a client of.  Yes, it is okay to be employed as a peer at the agency where you are a client at just as long as you don’t work for the program you are a client of. In fact my employment specialist made sure it was okay before I applied. Again, I am hopeful that I will be on the short list but realistically know that they most likely won’t hire a client and I am okay with that. At least I will have the experience of an interview.

Anyway after I am done writing this post, I am going to start reading a book. Not sure which one as I brought two to choose from. Both of which are science fiction books. I really enjoy science fiction and fantasy genres. I really enjoy reading. I will let you know what book I am reading and hope to let you know what I think of it after I am finished with the book.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. In fact I hope everyone has a great weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

A Cat That Has Me Reading

Good Evening, World!!! It is a Sunday evening in my corner of the world and it has been a relaxing Sunday for me. I came home from work and spent time with my new cat, Billie Dean before taking a nap. When I got up from a nap I had a snack before settling into a good day of reading.

I have noticed that when I have Billie Dean on my lap which is most of the time, it is a bit more challenging to have my laptop on my lap. With Lil Brooke I was able have both her and the laptop on my lap but with Billie Dean, not so much. It has made me realize how much I was on my computer before Billie Dean. I really didn’t need to be on the internet but sadly felt the need to be on whenever I was home. In a way it was and still in a way an addiction for me. Billie Dean is helping me with that and without even trying. He is being a real loving cuddle bug. A huge lap cat.

Since Billie Dean is such a lap cat I have come to realize, I have a great deal of reading to catch up on. So, I have been reading much of the afternoon and evening. Enough so that I forgot to eat a meal so as I write this blog, I have dinner in the oven. When I am done writing this I will go back to reading. When dinner is done cooking I will eat and then go back to reading. I really enjoy reading. It helps me get out of my head. Most importantly it helps me not be on the internet so much.

I don’t have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have a great week ahead. Try not to work too hard. Don’t forget to enjoy the little things life has to offer. Peace Out, World!!!