Monthly Archives: January 2024

Tough Start to the Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It has been a tough start to the day for me. I woke up a couple of hours ago due to a nightmare. It was a screaming nightmare and the reason why I know is because I am over at Junior’s house with my cat, Billie, and Junior informed me it was a screaming nightmare. Nightmares suck and I don’t envy PTSD on anyone including my worst enemy.

Junior is worried about my increased PTSD symptoms as he is worried it could affect the pregnancy. Hell, I am even more worried as I am that one that is pregnant. I just don’t want the PTSD to affect my pregnancy in any way. Having PTSD and being pregnant is not easy and I am grateful to have Junior and his love in my life.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Daily Prompt; Do You Spend More Time Thinking About the Future of the Past? Why?

Posted on by Gertie
Bloganuary writing prompt
Do you spend more time thinking about the future or the past? Why?
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This is a hard one for me especially after finding out that I am pregnant as it is hard to not think about the future especially for the child you are pregnant with. One cannot help but think about the future of their child and bringing one into this chaotic world.

Despite thinking about the future of my child as well as mine, I thought a great deal about my future and how much hope I have even through my struggles. For me I can’t help but think about the future and where my recovery journey will take me. Yes, I fear bigger relapses with my mental health challenges but hope is there that I will just get back up on horse and continue to work on my recovery.

On that note, I also think a lot about the past. Sometimes not willingly due to PTSD. PTSD sucks and has you thinking about some of the most horrific moments you experienced in your life. For instance PTSD has remember this stuff through flashbacks, nightmares, body memories, intrusive and much much more. There is no stopping remembering this stuff and it sucks big time.

Daily Prompt; Can You Share a Positive Example of Where You’ve Felt Loved?

Posted on by Gertie
Bloganuary writing prompt
Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?
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This should be an easy one but it is not as it hurts when I think that a high percentage of all the times I have had a positive example of love have happened when I have been an adult. I am not saying that I don’t have positive examples of how I felt loved, it’s just that I have more as an adult due to the trauma I experienced as a child.

If I had to choose a positive example of when I felt love is when a friend of mine who is the manager at PAWS Cat City where I volunteer at gave me a heart shaped stone as a reminder that I am loved when I am struggling. She had given it to me after she was able to grab a few at the end of a funeral service she attended. The person who passed away had a major influence on a lot of people’s lives including mine despite never meeting this person. Anyway, the pink heart shaped stone is a reminder of how loved I am and not just by the PAWS Cat City manager but by other friends as well as some family.

Somewhat Of A Challenging Night

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am tired as I didn’t sleep well last night. I didn’t sleep well last night due to the fact I was in so much pain that Junior ended up taking me to the hospital. Turns out that I have a kidney infection in the right kidney. I also have kidney stones as I had to have an MRI despite being pregnant. MRI’s, CT scans and X-Rays are not the best for pregnant people however the pain I was (and still am) experiencing could cause distress to the baby which causes harm. So, Junior and I with the help of the doctors weighed out the risk and thought it’s better to do the MRI. The MRI confirmed kidney stones.

Having kidney stones and a kidney infection is not fun especially since I am unable to take the pain meds doctors normally would prescribe. I am unable to take the pain meds due to being pregnant. On that note, I am able to take antibiotics for the kidney infection which is a good thing. The doctors put me on ten days worth of antibiotics and informed me to get in to see the OBGYN as soon as possible to make sure the kidney infection is clearing up and pain subsiding from the kidney stones.

I am just happy that Junior was able to take me to the emergency room and that what I am dealing with can be treated. I wish I was able to get some sleep but I am glad that the doctors were able to figure out what was wrong with me health wise.

I do not have much more to write about in the particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been A Good Sunday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It has been quite the day and it is just barely after five o’clock in the evening here in Seattle. I have had a pretty good Sunday. I started off today by volunteering at PAWS Cat City. It is nice to be able to be back in the swing of things at PAWS Cat City. I really enjoy volunteering with cats at PAWS Cat City.

After volunteering at PAWS Cat City I went to Red Robin with Junior to have lunch with some friends of ours. I always love Red Robin but since becoming pregnant I have been craving Red Robin like it’s going out of style. I really am happy to be able have had Red Robin with friends and Junior.

Now Junior and I are at his place with my cat, Billie. We are just going to spend some much needed time together. I’m pretty sure we are going to have some intimate moments later but until then we are going to spend time watching movies as Billie explores Junior’s house. Junior is an amazing partner. I love him so freaking much.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Daily Prompt; What is the Greatest Gift Someone Could Give You

Posted on by Gertie
Bloganuary writing prompt
What is the greatest gift someone could give you?
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For me the greatest gift someone can give me is their time, love and friendship. Giving your time to listen to me or to spend with me is the greatest gift a friend or loved one can give me. It shows me that they care about me and love me. I know it seems hokey but it is true.

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Lunch at Red Robin with Junior and mutual friends
  • Spend time with Junior
  • Color
  • Read
  • Work on recover based workbooks

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Color
  • Read
  • Work on recovery based workbooks

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Color
  • Read
  • Work on recovery based workbooks
  • Dinner with a good friend

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Emerald House virtual group
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery based workbooks
  • Attend a virtual 12 step meeting

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Emerald House virtual group
  • Lunch with a friend
  • Attend an LGBTQ+ virtual recovery group
  • Color
  • Read
  • Work on recovery based workbooks

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • Attend Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Virtual appointment with psychiatric nurse practitioner
  • Dinner at Red Robin with Junior
  • Color
  • Read
  • Work on recovery based workbooks

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Morning walk
  • University District Farmers Market
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery based workbooks

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It is Saturday evening which means I do my weekly check-in with you the reader. Overall, things have been overwhelming knowing that I am going to be a parent and give birth this summer. The thought of being a parent is both scary and exciting at the same time.

In fact my therapist and I discussed being pregnant and me becoming a parent. We talked about me being fearful of becoming like my parents when I become a parent and my therapist validated my fear. She assured me that I won’t end up parenting my kid like my parents parented me. I also talked to my therapist about my kid ending up with a mental health challenge due to my own mental health challenges. My therapist understands my concerns.

I am pretty sure I don’t have much more to check in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it weren’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Daily Prompt; Describe an Item You Were Incredibly Attached to as a Youth. What Became of It?

Posted on by Gertie
Bloganuary writing prompt
Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a youth. What became of it?
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The thing I was incredibly attached to as a youth was my teddy bear. It was a gift from one of my uncles the day I was born. I slept with it every night as a kid and even as a teenager. Hell, I slept with this teddy bear as an adult. I still have this teddy bear and I am nearly 45 years old. I stopped sleeping with it about five years ago because my teddy bear is getting extremely old and worn out. So, that means my teddy bear is spending his retirement years on display in my bedroom. My teddy bear is extremely well loved and has been through a great deal with me.

Caturday w/Billie the Kat + a Friend

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Caturday, World!!! I have decided to start posting pictures of my cat and on occasions other cats on Saturdays as who doesn’t love to look at pictures of cats. For those who are site impaired or blind I will do a caption on the photo as WordPress allows folks to do this on their blog. Well today I will be posting two photos of Billie plus another cat that got adopted from PAWS Cat City.

This sweet kitty posing in front of the I’m going home sign at PAWS Cat City. Twenty minutes later she met her new family and got adopted.
Billie laying on me as he is gives me a hug.
Billie acting all proper with his front legs crossed.

Well, that is it for this week’s pictures of the cuteness of my cat Billie and the sweet kitty that got adopted from PAWS Cat City. I hope you enjoy the pictures. Peace Out, World!!!