Monthly Archives: May 2020

Using My Privilege to Help Change

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am one fucking angry white person. I am angry because it appears me that the only time white people want to discuss anything about race is when something happens like in the case of George Floyd.  I think white people need to talk about the racism in our country everyday and need to figure out how to stop this hatred. It is up to white people to stop the systemic problems that people of color face on the daily basis. We need to have serious discussions on how we as white people can stop racism. It is up to white people to be ally’s to people of color and help them have their voice heard. It is up to us because the assholes in charge aren’t fucking listening.

As I end this post, I hope that white people will discuss how to stop racism. It is up to white people to end racism and NOT people of color to do so. In the coming weeks I have decided to have conversations with my white friends. I realize I could loose friends over such conversations and am willing to do so. I may not want to loose friends but am willing to do so, so I can at least be part of the solution and not the problem.

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A Post About the Fear I Have for the People I Serve

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! At this very moment I am at work. I have been at work for ten and a half hours. I have another two and a half hours left of my shift. I am tired as hell. I will be eager to get home for many reasons but I need to get some shit off of my chest.

I work with homeless individuals for young adults. Many of whom aged out of the foster care system and have a major distrust of the police. Anyway, I work in a shelter that is in Downtown Seattle. Right in the middle of where the riots are. The thing that pisses me off is that many of the police officers have accused some of the young adults of looting. Sadly, many of the folks being accused are people of color and the police officers that are doing the accusing are white. I know for a fact that the young adults I work with were involved with the peaceful protest and had absolutely nothing to do with the riots as they didn’t want to be apart in harming their community. Many of the young adults were harassed by white police officers as they were trying to get to shelter. Many of the folks I work with just want justice for George Floyd and many other like Mr. Floyd that were senselessly murdered by white cops.

I just hope that people realize that the murder of George Floyd needs to be dealt with. I say this because people of color live in fear everyday of their life that some white person or even worse a white cop will kill them. I worry most about the homeless folks who are of color as they get harassed even more than other people. Please lets all just take care of each other.

As I end this post here at work, there is still a major police presence and the National Guard is present as well. Sadly, people are still committing arson as well as looting. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you have taken the time to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Sunday. Please protest peacefully. Stay safe while you are out protesting. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Peace Out, World!!!

Say His Name; George Floyd

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! Right now many Americans like myself are angry as hell at the murder of George Floyd in Minneapolis, Minnesota by a white police officer. Many people around Minneapolis as well as around the United States are protesting the unjust death of George Floyd.

In fact as I write this post, the protest here in Seattle is still happening. I wish I could be protesting but sadly I can not due to the fact I hurt my knee and need to keep it up. So, I am writing this post as part of an individualized protest. I want people to be aware that this white person (me) will NOT tolerate racism of any kind. This white person (me) will not tolerate the murder of people of color by white police officers. This white person (me) will do what I can to be an ally to people of color or any other marginalized group. White people around the United States as well as the world NEED to do what we can to end racism. It is up to white people to end racism.

George Floyd you will be remembered. You are not forgotten.

Depression & Awesome News

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Despite it being sunny in Seattle, I am experiencing a great deal of sadness. Actually lets call the sadness what it is which is depression. Depression sucks no matter the timing of the year but for me it seems to suck more when it is nice outside. I really wish I didn’t have depression but it is a reality I deal with.

Yes, having depression is a reality for me but so is the sunny weather here in Seattle at the moment. Sunny weather which many people who live in the area for awhile appreciate a great deal. I love the sunny weather and it is suppose to get to eighty degrees, Fahrenheit. I love it when it is eighty degrees outside. Sadly, many people who are native to Seattle start melting when it hit seventy-five degrees outside.

Enough of the small talk of the beautiful weather here in Seattle and talk about something beyond awesome. Something that will bring back a sense of normalcy back into my life during Covid-19. I will be volunteering once again at PAWS Cat City. PAWS is opening Cat City back up for adoption and am so grateful for this. PAWS temporally closed Cat City for adoption due to Covide-19 and did all there cat adoptions at their main location in Lynnwood. In fact PAWS temporally halted volunteers going in to volunteer and am grateful that they did that. So, that mean PAWS had their employees do many of the task the volunteers do. PAWS is limiting the number of volunteers being able to volunteer on a shift. So, basically at PAWS Cat City there will only be one volunteer per shift and Cat City will reopen with limited hours. I am so grateful for the opportunity to volunteer once again even if it is not on my normal shift. Going back to volunteering is bringing back some normalcy back to my life. Grateful that I will be going back to semi-normal activities in my life. I think volunteering again will help with my depression.

I do not have much more to say especially since I feel like I have been repeating myself in this post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, than you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. I also hope everyone has a great weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

Update on Life the Last 24 Hours

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I just want to update on life in the last twenty-four hours. First lets start off with my job interview yesterday. Overall, I think it went quite well. There were many awkward moments in the interview but went well. If I get the job, I will like the schedule for the most part. I will have to change some things with my volunteer job but it is workable. Even though the interview went well, I am not holding my breath that I will get the job. I just do not want to get my hopes up too high.

Now back to a couple of hours ago. I took my cat, Billie Dean, into the vet. Don’t worry Billie is just fine and dandy. He went to the vet to get his nails trimmed. It took longer than usual because the vet techs and vet wanted some cuddle time with Billie. The vet even took two dollars off the bill for letting her and her vet techs have cuddle time with my “love bug.” I cannot deny that Billie is a “love bug.”

Now on to a previous post in the last few days about me taking a couple of courses WordPress does for free. I signed up for the courses a couple of days ago and have assignments that I will start on tonight. I will be posting those assignments starting tomorrow. The courses I am taking our: Writing: Intro to Poetry and Photography: Developing Your Eye I. I have done both of these course before and loved them. So I am doing them again. Plus, I feel like if I do these courses again they will be of help to me to blog on the more regular basis. I want to blog on the regular basis to keep you my followers and regular readers engaged.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your Thursday. Peace Out, World!!!

Full of Anxiety about Job Interview

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World. Right now I am full of anxiety regarding my job interview later on this morning. I am not sure why I am anxious about it but I am. Personally, I am always anxious before job interviews.

On the plus note about my job interview is that the weather is nice out here in Seattle. That means I do not have to wear a jacket or sweater which can be a bit cumbersome at a job interview especially when you depend on public transportation or car services like Lyft.

Right now the hard part for me is trying to keep my cat, Billie, from sitting on my lap. As much as I would love for my cat, Billie, to be on my lap, I want to limit the amount of hair I get on me. Sadly, I don’t have one of those lint rollers. I totally forgot to buy one when I was at the store last night.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys their Wednesday. If you live in Seattle, I hope you enjoy the weather. Peace Out, World!!!

At Odds With Myself on How to Help Someone I Graduated High School With

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am still unable to sleep for some reason. Since I have know idea of why I can’t sleep, I am not going to fret about it. It is most likely, as my psychiatric nurse practitioner says, “treatment resistant insomnia.” Weather it is insomnia or poor sleep hygiene or being off kilter from my job working nights, I can’t sleep.

Since I have not been able to sleep, one of the things I have been doing is scrolling Facebook. As I was scrolling Facebook, someone I went to high school with messaged me privately. This person isn’t exactly a friend but is on my friends list.

Anyway, this friend was born into wealth and finds themselves at odds with their parents. Since they are at odds with their parents and has no job, they are now trying to figure out how to live the life they are use to. I guess their parents have “cut them off” from their trust fund until they are able to live on their own with the help of their parents for two years. My friend really hasn’t held down a job and their parents paid for everything including all their bills. We have been out of high school for twenty plus years and they have not learned how to fend for themselves. This “friend” reached out to me because they know I “know how to live poor” since have lived in poverty most of my life.

I asked my friend if they have a place to stay. My friend said they can stay at their parents place till the end of the year as long as they pay one hundred dollars month for rent and get a job to save up money to get their own place to live. I gave this friend suggestions on the types of jobs they may be able to get during this time and they turned down every suggestion. I also gave them numbers to certain agencies to be able to get food stamps and such. I even offered to go to the nearest DSHS office with them when they open up. My “friend” said “no, it will be an embarrassment if I go near my parents house especially with you.” I informed them out the system worked and that if they want help they need to learn how to deal with the “embarrassment.” This friend stated “I don’t need any freebies. I just need my parents to give me my trust fund money and then I won’t have to depend on the government like you do.” I got upset by this and informed them that as soon as they are ready for my help then don’t hesitate to reach out. I realized that this person just wanted someone to empathize with them and tell them what they want to hear. I have some empathy for this person but I am not going to tell them what they want to hear.

I am at odds with myself as if I should have even offered up my assistance to help this person when they realize what needs to be done to take care of themselves. I am at odds because I can see this as a possible toxic relationship and me carrying the weight of this person. I want to help but I don’t know if this person will ever realize they are responsible for themselves as they have been spoiled their entire lives and taken care of by their parents. I am feeling like I am being judgement of this person and their family and it has me feeling bad about myself. But then again, this person was extremely judgmental for me in high school due to me living in poverty. Anyway, that shouldn’t be the reason I am so judgmental of the person.

I have plenty more to say about the above topic but I am getting angry over the situation and need to stop for now. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you are reading my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has great Tuesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Thoughts & Ideas

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is the middle of the night and I am unable to sleep once again. I wish I knew why I am unable to sleep but I realize that trying to figure it out will just frustrate the hell out of me.

As I sit here at my laptop, sleepless in Seattle once again, I am trying to figure out ways to blog on the regular basis. One thing that came to mind is to do free courses that WordPress does. I have decided to do their Writing: Intro to Poetry course as well as their Photography: Developing Your Eye 1 course. I figure if I do the courses it will help me get more in a groove of blogging on the regular basis. I know some people set up schedules and I have tried that which is something I will try again with the help of the WordPress courses I take.

I have officially signed up for the courses but I personally most likely won’t start them for a couple days. I am planning to do this so I can have time to work on the assignments. Of course when I work on the assignments, I hope to include my cat, Billie Dean in a couple of them. Most people love cats and hope including my cat, Billie will have new people reading my blog. I also want to incorporate Billie because, I love Billie and he is apart of my family.

I have also thought about other ways to blog on the regular basis. One of those ways is to discuss topics, you my reader are interested in. So, I guess I am asking you to do is comment on this post on what you would like me to discuss. I realize that my request appears to be a wee bit odd but I hope you will comment on this post on what you would like me to discuss.

I do not have much more to discuss. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things for reading my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog even though it is not interesting most of the time. I hope everyone has a great Tuesday ahead of them. Yes, I realize Alaska and Hawaii are still in Monday as I write this and hope they too have a great Tuesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

The Words of A Child

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! So far today has been a quiet stay at home day. It has been a day that I have not done much but binge watch television with my cat, Billie Dean on my lap. The Seattle weather has been quite helpful in that as it has been the typical Seattle gloom.

I have spent most of the day with my cat Billie Dean in my lap. Billie sat in my lap as I watched The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. I really enjoy this show for several reasons and am thrilled that Billie spent most of that time in lap as I watched it.

After watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross as Billie was curled up in my lap I decided to get on social media. Specifically, I went on Facebook as it is the the only social media account I have under my given name. (I do have a Facebook account as well as a Twitter account under my pen name of Gertie. You can find me under Gerties Journey on both social media accounts.) Anyway, when I was on Facebook under my given name, a friend of mine in the peer counseling community posted a quote from one of her children came up of a quote that I feel is great. My friends, child’s name is Avenlea Margaret. (Yes, I was given permission to mention my friends daughter’s name on here by both my friend and their daughter.) Avenlea Margaret is a creative person which doesn’t surprise me that she came up with the quote she did.

Avenlea Margaret’s quote is: “There’s no such thing as ugly. There’s just different ways to be beautiful.” I personally love this quote as it is an honest quote that comes from the mouth of an innocent child. A child that sees there are different ways to be beautiful and different ways to see beauty. Avenlea Margaret is wise beyond her years and hope to read more quotes she says on her parents Facebook account. It is my hope with posting this that you are able to see that there is only beauty in this world and it just looks differently just like Avenlea stated.

I do not have much more to say. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of you Monday. Peace Out, World!!!

A Memorial Day Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! The weather here in Seattle is a bit gloomy which is fitting for it being Memorial Day. Today is Memorial Day here in the United States and is a holiday that we remember our fallen troops. The one thing I do not understand is many people here in the United States don’t really understand what Memorial Day is all about and that saddens the hell out of me. I just wish I could do what I normally do on Memorial Day; put flags on the grave of fallen soldiers but sadly I cannot due to Covid-19.

Since it is a gloomy day here in Seattle, I will be spending it at home with my cat, Billie Dean. If Billie has his way, he will be spending Memorial Day in my lap and he will be getting his way in this aspect as he and I both need it today. I think we both need him to be in my lap today as it comforting to the both of us.

While Billie is in my lap sleeping, I will be watching one of my favorite childhood shows; The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. I do not know why but for some reason this show puts me at ease and calms me down. Maybe it is how he speaks or how he paints or maybe a combination of both. I also think the reason why I like the show so much it that Bob Ross makes the painting look so easy. I just love watching the Joy of Painting with Bob Ross.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys your Monday. Please do not forget to take moment of silence for those who lost their lives fighting for our freedom. Peace Out, World!!!