Wanting to Post but Nothing to Post

Hello, World!!!! Right now, I am feeling left out or left behind. I feel like this because some of the things I am discussing to friends and family especially family don’t seem to understand how traumatic this entire lay of thing has been on not just the clients but the staff. I just feel like I have nobody to go to that understand but my therapist. I need someone other than my therapist to talk to about it. My family it traumatizing me more about talking about it with them so what the use of discussing it with them. I don’t want to wear out the friends I do have. I just feel like the only people who know are the ones I work with and we just want to discuss it with others because it will make us more upset discussing at this point.

I do have to I Billie has been a great help through all of this and keeping an eye me. I feel like I am neglecting him in a away. Mainly by not play with him as much. I love my Billie so much and he was a good boy today. I took him outside the building with his leash and harness and it was the first time he didn’t try to run back to the building door. It only last five minutes but I’m proud of Billie for it. It was also the perfect Seattle weather to do it in as well.

I don’t have much to say except thank you for reading my blog. Have a good rest of you Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!

Official Date for Lay Off from Work

Good Evening, World!!!! I finally found out when my lay off date is at work and am not sure if I am allowed to share it as I signed some documentation. In all honest with you, I think it’s the other shit that they don’t want out there. Not everyone has the same lay off date but mine is June 3rd of this year. I’m sad I only have a couple of weeks to say goodbye to client but they will be going to place that will be helpful to them. My place employment was a mental health agency the was geared toward the queer community was it’s main focus so Seattle experience a big loss especially since it’s been around for fifty three years.

On that note I’ve have friends and family checking on me that makes me feel loved. Having a good support system is needed when you are in recovery from anything. I truly love my friends and family and that they love and care for me back. My colleagues are in the same category as friends and family.

Speaking of friends and family, Billie Dean, my cat is on my lap as I write this post as I listen to my recovery playlist from Spotify. My cat being near me is surely helping my emotions just like the music is. Music is a go to for me to change my mood around. Billie my cat listening to the music just helps that just much more.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, again thank you from the bottom of my hear for reading my blog. Peace Out, World.

Weekly Check In

Good Evening, World!!! Good news is my grandpa’s Honor Flight finally happened was not post poned for the hundredth time. So for are he is enjoying it and the is making me happy. As I sit here hat home in Seattle with my cat Billie Dean, I wish I was with my grandpa but I understand why he want to go alone and not make anyone jealous or envies. It’s also nice to just be home alone with my cat Billie.

As far are as my job goes, it is still up in the air and driving everyone including staff, clients and the count bat shit crazy. The Board of Directors want’s is closed completely however the county it is trying to keep the agency open. Honestly, I think the reality of it is that it will close.

I really wish I was in the other Washington (DC) with my grandpa but I respect his wishes and am happy his honor flight is finally happening. I am happy that I have friend and family sending cards to my grandpa for “mail call” during his honor flight.

I just that is my weekly check in. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless in Seattle with Reminders of Childhood

First and fore most I would like to wish my friend Jodi a happy birthday. If she were still alive she would be 40 years old today. I think that is why I am listening to my childhood playlist on Spotify. To remember all the good things we had growing up.

I wish I could sleep but sadly I can’t. I think it is because I have so much on my mind which is why I am listening to childhood music and reading comic books. Of course Billie Dean my cat wants to help me blog.

Reading comic books and listening to childhood music help me grieve the death of my friend. She was a great friend, I should get going and try to sleep. I do have to work. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out World!!!

Gratitude of Ramblings

Hello, World!!! The last month and a half has been a whirl wind especially at work. My past and current collogues have been nothing but awesome. Despite the board directs wanting to close our agency down there is some hope because the county wants us to stay open. To me the very little hope is what is keeping me going. That and the clients we serve.

I’m also grateful to the blogging community for the support you are giving me. You fellow bloggers are a big reason I continue to blog and that is because of of the support you give to me and others.

Now on to my friends, family and my cat, Billie Dean. I wouldn’t have gone through this if it it wasn’t for your support. The same support my colleagues give me .

The love and hope a receive from all of you helps me stay in my recovery and helps me keep focused on the clients my employer serves. Thank you again from the bottom of my hear for reading my blog. Without you reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Semi-Woe Is Me Moment

Hello World!!!I went to my volunteer job at PAWS Cat City like I do every Sunday. I had me a great time. I love spending time with kitties waiting for their furrever home.

On that note I got to my floor where one of my neighbors started raising her voice at me. I ignored her and passed by her so I can get to my apartment. Of course I’m greeted my by cat who escaped into the hall way and this neighbor who already yelled at me, started screaming on my cat and myself. I’ve never seen cat so scared and run back to the apartment. It took all my might to not interact with this neighbor.

I spent some time with Billie Dean to calm him down which calmed me down. Which was helpful for the both of us. I went down to the community room to get a soda not know this neighbor has going to be down there doing a puzzle. She screamed at me an called me names that I won’t mention here because I found them offence of and don’t want to offend anyone else. I got my soda and listened to her and I left the community room crying. I did not say anything to her except “I hope you have a good Sunday” and left the community room and came to my apartment. Spent some more time with a Billie Dean my cat which helped.

I then reached out to a neighbor who is a friend so I could get a good reality check and a hug. We talked about twenty minutes and I felt better. The conversation I had with the neighbor I am friends with pointed out that I wouldn’t have taken all this so hard due to my work situation and being laid off with an unknown lay of date. He said “I would be having a woe is me moment if I were in your situation. The only difference is that yours is a semi woe is me moment which is goo for you.” He also suggested the I try to be friends with some of my neighbors which is true.

I do not have much more to say. I just want to say thank you for reading my blog. If it wasn’t for you reading my blog, I would not be writing it. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Sleepless Night in Seattle for this Human but not the Cat

As I mentioned in my last post a colleague of mine attempted suicided. This friend and colleague are going to make it. I visited for a couple of hours and came home to do some self care. Self care that included reading about Seattle History while holding my teddy bear and other stuffed animals. Of course I am unable to sleep due to my colleague but my cat is sure sound asleep snoring a way. I love my cat so much and am appreciative that you read my blog not matter how debby downer it is or positive polly it is and everything in between. Thank you for being loyal readers.

Coming to Terms with the Reality but there is a Glimmer of Hope

Hello, World!!! I’ve been absent from blogging due to finding out that the agency I work at will be be closing down according to the board of directors. On the hopeful side King County wants to keep my employer open. Open because we have been the longest opened Queer mental health agency in North America if not the world. It’s been open for 53 years. It’s been around longer than I have been a live. I know the reality is that it most likely will close but at least there is some hope from King County,

I trying work with some amazing colleagues who I have grown to love a family. I just hope they feel the same about me. My colleagues have become both friends and chosen family. I just hope a miracle from the universe or a hail Mary happens before the final decision is made. If it were up to the board of directors the agency would have been shout down by now.

Any way peoples cats and other pets have been keeping us entertaining during meetings as well as sessions with clients. I will miss seeing all the pet and animals my clients and colleagues have. Shutting down Seattle Counseling Services is not a good thing especially for the Queer community.

I don’t have much to say but I have a very slightly hope that my employer can stay open. I don’t have anything else to say except thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you reading my blog, I wouldn’t be writing my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading m blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Not the not So Typical Weekly Plans Blog

This weeks, weekly plans are not going go as planned. I didn’t get much sleep because I ended up in the hospital because my depression and anxiety were acting up. Thankfully, I wasn’t in a suicide mode or self harm mode.

After a few hours of sleep I am going to my grandpa’s house to do laundry. So sleep and laundry are on the list for today.

Of course I will be working Monday through Friday this week. It will not be an easy week but at least my friends, family and colleagues are being supportive.

Weekly Check In

It is another Saturday night in Seattle. Of course I am spending it alone with my cat, Billie Dean. In fact Billie has been helping me with the depression and the anxiety. My friends and family have been helping as well, like my cat Billie as well as my colleagues. It feels great to feel loved by my pet cat as well as my friends, family and colleagues.

The best part of this week is that I will be there to the last day which is May 6th. I might even be there to September but that is not one hundred percent yet. At least there is somewhat of a date. I really love this job and feel like I have a niche at this job.

It is a sad day in a America when the longest queer mental health agency is closing down. My employer serves more than two thousand clients and it breaks my heart that the clients have to go to other agencies that has caused trauma to them.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you the reader, read my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!