A Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Good Morning, World!!! It is just after three o’clock in the morning here in Seattle. Sadly, I cannot sleep. I am blaming it on insomnia. Insomnia sucks shit. At least I have today off so I can take it easy. Also, my cat, Billie Dean, is keeping me company with laying right beside me at the moment as I type this blog post.

The things that have been keeping me busy tonight since I am unable to sleep is listening to music while I do some art. I am listening to some AC/DC and Guns & Roses as I color. I am coloring a Mandela from a coloring book I bought on Amazon. As much as I am not a fan of buying stuff on Amazon, I am grateful for the coloring book options. For some reason coloring a Mandela while listening to eighty’s rock music is quite soothing. I love AC/DC and Gun & Roses.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post as I want to try to get some sleep. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader read my blog. If it weren’t for you the reader, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Coping Skills I am Using While Being Annoyed with Anxiety and Depression

Good Afternoon, World!!! If you read my last blog post you know that I am taking a mental health day off because my anxiety and depression are getting in the way for me to be productive working today especially with clients. I don’t want my own issues to get in the way of be being productive at work.

On that note, I have been working on some art work. Specifically, I have been coloring. I color because it is a mindfulness meditation for me while I can be creative. It also gives me a sense of accomplishment was I am done with the coloring page. Feeling accomplished with a finished product is an amazing feeling.

As I color, I will be listening to music. Specifically, I will be listening to my recovery playlist. A playlist the helps me with my recovery and how far I have come. It also helps me realize how much more I can grow in my recovery. It also helps me be creative. Not only will I be listening to music, I will be listening to a podcast on philosophy. I love learning about philosophy. The philosophy podcast I will be listening to is “Philosophize This.” I really learn a lot from this podcast. It is nice to be able to listen to music as well as a podcast about philosophy as I color to be creative.

I also have decided that I will be reading as well. I will be reading the book “The Republic and Other Works” by Plato. Which goes along the lines the the topic of philosophy like the podcast I will be listening to. Apparently I am on a philosophy kick at the moment and I am okay with that because I am learning a lot from it.

Of course my cat is being a great comfort to me as my anxiety and depression are acting up and am grateful for Billie Deans unconditional love for me. Billie is such a love bug and enjoys being on my lap. I love my cat, Billie so much. Billie helps me keep grounded. He is an amazing little kitty. Actually not exactly little as he is 15 pounds. I love my cat so much.

Sadly, the weather in Seattle is a bit gloomy which doesn’t help with the depression but on that note, with all the self care things I am doing will help.

I don’t have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Taking a Mental Health Day Off of Work

Good Morning, World!!! Today, I am taking an unplanned day off from work. I am using it as a mental health day as my anxiety and depression are at level where I don’t think I could be of any help to anyone. No, my anxiety and depression aren’t in the mode to be truly concerned about however they would get in the way of working effectively. I want to be in a good state of mind to be able to work with my clients so I don’t want my anxiety and depression or anxiety getting in the way.

On that note, I will be taking care of myself by doing some self care. One way I will be doing some self care is art work. Specifically, the type of artwork I will be doing is coloring. Coloring is very soothing for me. It is a type of mindfulness meditation for me.

While coloring I will be listening to music. The music, I will be listening to is my recovery playlist. My recovery playlist are songs that help be remember how far I have come as well as songs to encourage me to continue my journey on my recovery path. Music helps a great way to help myself and my recovery.

Another think I plan to do as I color is to also listen a podcast. A podcast specifically about philosophy. I love learning about philosophy and wished I learned more about it in high school. The philosophy podcast I will be listening to is “Philosophize This.” “Philosophize This” is an amazing podcast in my opinion. I encourage you to listen to it.

Besides coloring while listening music and a podcast, I will be hanging out with my beloved cat, Billie Dean. My cat Billie is such a lovey Dovey kitty. Billie is such a lap cat and loves to cuddle and spends a lot of time in my lap. I love my Billie and more that grateful that he is a lap cat that sleeps with me when it is bedtime.

I do not have much more to discuss in the particular blog post. I would like to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things that you read my blog. It it wasn’t for you reading my blog, I wouldn’t be writing my blog. Again, thank from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless in Seattle Once Again

Good Morning, World!!! I am wide awake once again at god awful time in in the middle for no reason at all. It is starting to get me fucking frustrating that I can not sleep. Insomnia sucks. I of course am listening to a podcast on philosophy as well as listening to music. Both help with good self care but occasionally don’t help on occasion.

I have also been doing some coloring how ever my hands are getting cramped up. So leads me to doing the CAlm app which helps me a great deal. I think I will be doing to mindfulness stuff to help help me sleep today.

I have hope everyone has a great night head of them. I will b spending tie with my cat Billie Dean as he she loves to cuddled with me. I love my Billie so much.

I don’t have much more to say in this blog post. I thank you for reading my blog post. It means a great deal to me. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 12: Critique a Piece of Work

Today, we are suppose to critique a piece of work which can be artwork, music or writing. It is hard to critique other people work as most of the time other peoples work is better than mine. I critique my own artwork, music and writing all the time. Sadly, the critique becomes self judgement so I try not to critique my own work.

So instead of critiquing, I am going to go on rant. A rant about how people in recovery get stigmatized all the fucking time. People who are in recovery from addiction and/or mental health challenges get stigmatize so much that some people choose to not share their struggles and sadly pass away from their addiction or die by suicide. People can live in long term recovery from addiction as well as mental health challenges. I just wish we weren’t judges so harshly for something that is not are fault. So, before you judge someone due to an addiction and/or mental health challenge think of how you would feel if it was you being judged.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 9: Writing and Not Writing

When I got today’s inspiration the two things I initially thought on what I do when I am not writing is work and volunteering. I then realized that do write when I work. I have to write notes regarding clients. It is not my favorite part of the job yet I have been informed that I am really good at it.

As far as volunteering, I don’t write. When I volunteer I help take care of cats. Cats that are up for adoption and all of them really cute. I love volunteering my time helping cats get new homes. Volunteering gives me a sense of community as well as a sense of satisfaction.

Another thing I do when I am not writing is listen to music. I listen to music to help with my mental health as well as to have background noise as I live alone with my cat, Billie Dean. I sometimes dance to the music. When I dance to the music, my cat, Billie gives me this weird look that makes me laugh.

I also listen to podcast when I am not writing. I love listening to podcast. I listen to podcast that can educate me on a topic, I do not know much about. I also listen to some podcast for the entertainment. I love to learn as well as to be entertained.

I do many more things when I do not write but I do not want to bore you with everything. I am grateful that I have the ability to read and write.

The Basic’s of the Reality of Self Care & Self Love

Happy Midnight from my corner of the world which is Seattle, Washington. As I stated it is midnight here in Seattle and it appears that I am unable to sleep. At this point in time I don’t think it is insomnia that is keeping me up.

The reason why I am thinking it is not insomnia as I have been doing to some good self care after the toe infection I have been dealing with. Even though I am suppose to be staying off of it, I am have been doing some major chores around my apartment. Specifically, I have been cleaning it as it is in desperate need of a major cleaning. The lack of cleanliness hasn’t been good for my depression which is why I am been cleaning about thirty minutes day. While cleaning I have been listening to music. Specifically, I have been listening to my Recovery Music list to keep me motivated.

Another thing that has helping me stay motivated is by doing mindfulness and meditation practices. Practicing mindfulness and meditation as helped me stat focused on what I need to do for good self care as well as good self love. Self love is extremely challenging for me which is why I am doing my best to do things that create self love in myself by doing mindfulness and meditation practices on a daily schedule.

As part of my self care, I am starting read books for fun again. I noticed when I read for fun it helps me go on a mini vacation without costing too much money. It could be done in many situations and can also be considered a form of mindfulness.

Oh an lets not forget about reading comic books. Comic books is a great way to do good self care as well as an awesome form of self love. Comic books has a way for me to believe in myself in ways other types of reading material may not be quite as helpful.

I recently bought some magazines regarding mindfulness, meditation , journaling as well as creativity to help me continue on good self care and good self love. Of course all this will be help me especially if I stick to it like I plan to. Journaling will be a good help with my recovery.

The one thing that helps me everyday, multiple times a day to stay grounded is my cat Billie Dean. Billie has been a great help with staying in the reality of doing good self care and self love. I love my cat Billie so much and am grateful for being able to having as a mindfulness exercise multiple times a day.

On a plus note I was able to go to work today (Friday) and was thrilled about it. I love being a Peer Support Specialist which is why I am focusing on self-care and self-love.

I do not have much more to say i this particular blog. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog; it truly is greatly appreciated. Now it is time to say goodnight now that is it midnight Seattle time. Plus it is time to cuddled with my precious kitty Billie Dean aka Billie the Kat aka Billie. I have everyone has great night ahead of them. Have an awesome weekend ahead and don’t forget to do good self care. You my readers are just very awesome people. Thank you for reading my blog. Good Night and Peace Out, World!!!

Ramblings About Today

Good Evening, World!!! I missed my session with my new therapist on Tuesday and she called me today to do fifteen minute session. Something I wasn’t expecting but I am very much grateful for the time she gave me. Her kindness is awesome. I am a little weary of her being so timid but I will give her a chance as sometimes the timid ones tend to be the best therapist I have had.

I did work from work from home today. I only had three clients today and all were done via phone. The other part of the day was a two hour meeting as well as writing notes. According to the Clinical Director, I “write really good notes.” I am not sure about that but I having to train all the Peer Specialist how to write them when the lead peer comes back from leave. I am not sue how this person will react as I have only be at my new employer for five months. I really do love my job.

As much as I love the work I do, I do need time to take care of myself. So I am spending this evening doing art. The type of art I am doing is coloring. I love coloring as it is quite helpful. I colored as I listened to a podcast about philosophy. The specific podcast I listened to is Philosophize this. I learned a great about philosophy and finished a picture that I am proud of.

Now it is time for me to turn on the music full blast as I clean my bathroom. Doesn’t sound very fun but I enjoy cleaning the bathroom especially since that is where my cats litter box is. I love my cat Billie Dean so much that I clean the bathroom everyday. Billie seems to like it as I play some really good music.

I don’t have much more to say in this particular blog post. I, do, however, want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means a great deal to me. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Self-Care Saturday

Good Afternoon, World!!! Today has been a day of self care and I dubbed today as Self-Care Saturday. I didn’t realize I was actually to a couple of friends over a Zoom call and the let informed me that I was doing self-care. We discussed that doing self-care is a very good thing even when we are doing well. As my two friends and I discussed self-care I realized that doing self-care when I am well like I am now will help do good self-care when I am not doing so well.

One of the ways, I have done self-care today is attended three twelve-step meetings over Zoom. One of the meetings is based here in the Seattle area while another is based in London, England and the other is based in Sydney, Australia. So, I have been attending twelve-step meetings all of the world today. The twelve-step program I am in is awesome and has both twelve-step principles and peer recovery principles. I think the reason why I love this particular twelve-step program is because it feels more like a peer recovery program than a twelve-step program.

Another way I have been doing self-care today is doing artwork. Specifically the type of artwork I have been doing is coloring. Coloring has been a great way for me to do self-care. It is a way for me do mindfulness and in a way a meditation. I have always enjoyed coloring and love to do it. It brings me joy and connects me with my inner-child. An inner-child that needs to be healed and is being healed with all the work I am doing in my recovery.

As I colored, I listened to music. Music that brings me so much joy. Today, as I colored I listened to my “Childhood Memories” playlist that is over sixteen hours long. I don’t remember how many song on my “Childhood Memories” playlist at the moment. I’m grateful that I chose my “Childhood Memories” playlist along with the coloring helped with the healing process of healing my inner-child.

Of course part of my self-care is my cat Billie Dean. Billie is such a help to me. He knows exactly know when I need attention from him. I also can’t imagine what my life would be like without him. I love having Billie lay in my lap as I type this blog post. I think he is needing some connection right now and I am grateful that he is such a lap cat.

Something Billie likes is when I eat chicken for a meal and I ordered a big bucket meal from Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC). The big bucket meal will feed me for five meals including breakfast. Of course when I eat the chicken I will share it with my cat, Billie.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your Saturday as well as your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Been Exposed & Under Self Quarantine

Good Morning, World!!! It has been a few weeks since I last blogged. There are multiple reasons why I have blogged as well as many excuses but neither the reason or excuse really matter at this moment in time. Or at least they don’t matter to me at the moment.

A lot has happened in the last week alone. I found out last Thursday (July 16th) that I was exposed to Covid-19 the last time I worked which was on Saturday, July 11th. A client of the homeless shelter I work at test positive and am grateful that this person is now at a quarantine site here in the Seattle area.

Anyway since I was exposed, I am under self quarantine and am getting tested later on today (Monday). I made the appointment to get tested right after finding out I was exposed. Another good thing regarding all this is that I had already had a virtual appointment with my doctor made for this past Friday (July 17th) which made it easy for me to talk to my doctor about what to expect regarding the test. She also informed me that she didn’t want me to go work on Saturday (July 18th) till I get tested and the results come back as negative. I informed her that my employer was being very insistent with me going into work to do my regular shift. She and I discussed that if I get fired over going against doctors orders in the midst of a pandemic will make my employer “look bad and is grounds for a lawsuit.” I am just grateful that she has my back and wrote me a note for work. She also advised me to self quarantine which is a no brainer.

Since I am under quarantine till I get tested and the results, I will be spending a lot of time at home. At least I will have my cat, Billie Dean with me. I am so happy that I have Billie especially right now. My doctor and I came up with a plan on things I can do to make sure my mental health doesn’t decline while in self quarantine. We discussed a great deal about my cat Billie Dean and how he will be helpful. I told my doctor that I have plenty of art projects I can do especially in the coloring and collaging genres. I also informed her that I have a lot of reading to catch up on. This brought up the topic of our love of reading and the books I am hoping to read. I also mentioned that I have movies I want to watch and she even suggested some that I might be interested in. We discussed music as well. Specifically we discussed me not playing my flute or harmonica just in case I am positive. This will be challenging for me to do as playing one of my musical instruments especially my flute has been a life saver for me when things get challenging for me. We did discuss that listening to music is an option and will be used. We also discussed me keeping in touch with my therapist and that she will reach out to my therapist and I informed her that I already did which she wasn’t surprised about.

Anyway, my therapist to get back to me this past Friday after talking with my doctor. He was grateful that she and I, both reached out to him regarding me being exposed. We basically discussed similar things my doctor and I talked about regarding keeping myself busy. The last thing he and my doctor want is my mental health to decline while in self quarantine and I don’t blame them. I am worried as well. I am also grateful that we will be doing daily check-ins till I get my test results back. If they come back negative then the daily check-ins will discontinue and I hope my test results will come back negative.

Anyway, I don’t have much more to say. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. I hope everyone has a great Monday ahead. Peace Out, World!!!