It’s Been a Busy Couple of Weeks

Hello, World!!! It has been almost two weeks since I last posted. I have been busy with a lot of things lately especially job related. I’ve done my three shadowing shifts that I needed to do. In fact it is suppose to be six shadowing shifts however everyone I shadowed informed my supervisor that I don’t need all six shadowing shifts. I still have other training’s I need to do as part of my job. Despite having to do more training’s for work, I still yet to be called to do a shift for someone as I am an on call shelter counselor.

On top of work stuff I have been volunteering at the Warm Line as well as a group facilitator at a peer run agency. Not only am volunteering two places and working I am also volunteering for two local politicians. I am the annoying person who calls you to remind you to vote and to endorse the candidate I am volunteering for. So, yes, I am getting more involved with politics this year. I loved it the last time I did it and have decided to do this year.

I have also been going to doctors appointments every two weeks. This is to help me not go to the emergency room for minor health issues as well as mental health stuff. It appears to be working a great deal as it is keeping me from going to the emergency room for minor health issues.

On top of seeing my regular doctor every two weeks, I am seeing my therapist twice a week.  He is doing this to help me stay out of the emergency room as well the extra support I need right now in regards to my new job. My therapist is amazing. He is just as amazing as Gilbert and Diana were.

Thank you for reading. I hope to be more vigilant when it comes to blogging on the more regular basis. I am grateful for all of you who read my blog regularly. Have a goodnight everyone. Peace out, world!!!

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Hump Day Morning Ramblings

Good Morning, World!!! Happy Hump (Wednesday) Day!!! I woke up extremely early this morning due to a fucking nightmare and couldn’t get back to sleep. I have attempted many times since waking up to post but am finally in a space to be able to do so.

Just like this morning, I didn’t have a good morning yesterday. In fact my day yesterday (Tuesday) was shitty. I woke up yesterday with strong urges to self harm which I did NOT act on. I thankfully had an appointment my doctor and I was noticeably upset which is rare for my doctor to witness. We discussed the issues of self harm and did a safety plan before we called my therapist. Surprisingly, he picked up and the three of us talked. We decided that I would go see my therapist yesterday for an unexpected session.

When I attended my unexpected session yesterday, my therapist and I spent an hour and a half talking about what the hell was going on with me. We discussed self harm issues of course.  We also discussed how a combination of the grief with my grandma and the stress of starting a new job which could be causing the high urges to self harm. During our unexpected session yesterday we both agreed that me coming in today for my regularly scheduled appointment would be very much needed.

So, when I woke up this morning with a nightmare, I also woke up feeling suicidal and having urges to self harm. So that is when I called the after hours crisis line I am able to call when I am in a crisis. As I talked with the woman on the other end who knows me well, we discussed ways to keep myself safe till I see my therapist later this morning. So, yes, I can keep myself safe till I talk with my therapist and come up with another safety plan with him during our appointment.

Another thing that is keeping me from self harm and dying by suicide is that I have a training I need to be at for work this evening. So, working is actually helping me with keeping myself safe from myself.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is very much appreciated. I am grateful for all of you because you read my blog. I hope everyone has an awesome day. Peace Out, World!!!

(SIDE NOTE: I will NOT attempt to die by suicide and I will NOT harm myself.)

No Zzz’s In Seattle

Hello, World!!! It is just a few minutes after two in the morning in my corner of the world. I am unable to sleep and it is starting to piss me off. I think it is pissing me off more than usual that I can not sleep because my health insurance company is being a butthead in regards to covering my new sleep med. I don’t think it is too much to ask to look over a piece of paper that was faxed over last week on two different occasions. It is just infuriating as hell when one is waiting on a decision that could effect one’s health and mental health.

On a plus note Lil Gertie successfully took most of her meds to treat her asthma and allergies. Granted it wasn’t the full dose but at least it was most of it. So far she hasn’t had any coughing attacks since taking the meds. I am hoping that the meds are working as I love Lil Gertie. She has become family and I don’t want to loose her. I know asthma is treatable it just worries me.

I know all this worrying isn’t helping with the insomnia and I am hoping that with posting about it, that it could be helpful for me to get some sleep. Sleep that is much needed if I am to remain healthy myself.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. I think I am going to attempt getting some sleep once again. Your readership is greatly appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Worries of the Night

Hello, World!!! It is now twelve thirty in the morning in my corner of the world. I am still up due to watching late night television. Late night television helps me deal with life in general especially today. I say this because Lil Gertie has given me a couple of days due some coughing episodes and today’s coughing episodes were scary and worrisome. So, I took her to the vet. The vet diagnosed her with allergies and mild asthma even though the vet didn’t hear wheezing. She determined the mild asthma diagnosis by watching the two videos I took of Lil Gertie’s coughing attacks. The vet, Dr. B, said I did the right thing with the videos.

Another thing that I am worried about is the sleeping meds and my health insurance being slow to approve the pre-authorization for it. It is tough to be dealing with lack of sleep but am grateful for what little sleep I do get especially when I don’t have anything to help with it.

I do not have much more to say. I think I am going try to get some shut eye. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a good night. Peace Out, World!!!

A Post In Respect to Senator McCain and My Grandma

Good Morning, World!!! As I type here at my laptop, I watching the Sunday morning news. The main topic of the morning news is about the death of Senator John McCain. The news is doing a great job in honoring Senator John McCain.

As the country mourns the death of an amazing man, John McCain, my heart goes out to his family. My heart goes out to his family because my family and I are still mourning the death of my grandma. Yes, my grandma’s death was on Valentines Day of this year (2018) which was six and half months ago and Senator McCain’s death was only yesterday. My heart goes out to the family of Senator McCain because I truly understand the pain they must be going through. Yes, the deaths of my grandma and Senator McCain were due to two different diseases but still as difficult deal with.  My grandma passed away due to complications from Parkinson’s Disease while Senator McCain passed away due to Brain Cancer. Both the diseases my grandma and Senator McCain may have be completely different but both affected the brain. So that is why my heart goes out a little more to his family because I understand to an extent of what his family is going through.

As I watch the news about Senator McCain, I can’t help but be hit my grief to not just his death but the death of my grandma. As many of you know, I have been hit hard by a wave of grief of my grandma’s death within the last week even though her death was six and half months ago.

So, as I end this post I want to honor both Senator John McCain and my grandma. I may not be a conservative like Senator McCain, I admire his work as a war hero and politician. So, please take the time out today to honor Senator McCain and the loved ones you have lost just like I am going to do. Thank you for reading my blog. Please, if comment on this post, be respectful. I am honoring my grandma and Senator McCain. Have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Blog
  • Co-Facilitate Group (A volunteer gig I have)
  • Spend time with family

Monday

  • Blog
  • Therapy
  • Head to Hotel for conference
  • Help set up last minute stuff for peer conference
  • Spend time with friends (who are fellow peer specialist/counselors)

Tuesday

  • Blog
  • Attend and Volunteer at Peer Conference
  • Spend time with friends (who are fellow peer specialist/counselors)

Wednsday

  • Blog
  • Attend and volunteer at peer conference
  • Head home after conference is over
  • Spend time with cat when I get home from the conference

Thursday

  • Blog
  • Go to doctor’s appointment
  • General lazy day
  • Spend time with cat, Lil Gertie

Friday

  • Blog
  • Job interview
  • Spend time with family

Saturday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Spend time with friends
  • Volunteer at the Warm Line

 

Noon Time Randomness

Good Afternoon, World!!! I just woke up from a late morning nap and is now twelve noon. I decided to take a nap after reading the news paper and a good cry over my grandma. I still miss my grandma and I don’t think that will ever go away.

I also had a good cry over what was in the newspaper this morning. Actually it has been all over the news on television as well. The good cry I had was about how there is a cat killer in Washington’s capital city of Olympia. Sadly, eleven cats have been killed in Olympia. Olympia is about sixty miles southwest of Seattle. As a cat owner this angers me. What kind of sick individual kills harmless animals especially cute cuddly cats that love with all their heart.

Now onto a totally different subject, the weather. Seattle weather is much more cooler. But unfortunately the cooler weather isn’t helping the air quality of the region due to the wild fires. The poor air quality is effecting my asthma greatly.

I don’t have much to say in the post either. Sorry for such short post as of lately. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!