A Wednesday Evening Post

Good Evening, World!!! I am still dealing with increased Depression and PTSD symptoms and have emailed my therapist regarding it. I emailed my therapist regarding the increased symptoms just to have him be aware of the situation even though I personally think the increased mental health symptoms are due to the health issues I am dealing with. The health issues I am dealing with happen to be a “severe Urinary Tract Infection (UTI) and mild right Kidney Infection.” It is not uncommon for me to have an increase mental health symptoms whenever I have an UTI which just makes things the much more uncomfortable. My therapist emailed me back about the email sent him about me struggling and he too “hope symptoms improves” as my infections improve. I am grateful that I have a therapist that is supportive.

I just got back from Red Robin with a friend who lives in my apartment building. I treated my friend to Red Robin as a thank you for putting up with my shit. My friend is an awesome individual and extremely caring. She was and is very appreciative of me taking her to Red Robin. We ended up having the same thing at Red Robin which was The Whiskey Barbecue Burger with bottomless fries. She had an ice tea to drink while I had a freckled lemonade which is strawberry lemonade. It was nice to spend time with a good friend at my favorite restaurant.

When I arrived home from dinner at Red Robin with my friend, I noticed that the three books I ordered from Amazon arrived. Thankfully, they left them outside my apartment door instead of outside the apartment building door. The three books I ordered are about race as I want to be a better ally to people of color. I also order two more books from Amazon about race. One of which should arrive tomorrow and the other book is on back order and should arrive at the end of September. I am going to start off reading the book “How To Be An AntiRacist” by Ibram X. Kendi. I will let you know how the book is and will do a book review on it. Reading is one of my go to things to help my mental health symptoms and anytime I can be educated on anything is a plus. I really hope I can get a better understanding about race as I want to be the best ally I can be. If anyone has any books about race to suggest, it would be greatly appreciated. Remember, I have three that arrived today including the one I mention, two on the way from Amazon and one in my Amazon cart. So, if you suggest a book that I may have or will have don’t take offence if I say something that “I have it” or “its on the way” or “its in the cart.” I look forward to all the good reads.

I do not have much more to say. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a good rest of your evening as well as your week. Peace Out, World!!!

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A Rude Awaking

Good Morning, World!!! I was almost fully asleep when the fire alarm in my apartment building went off once again. I thought it was another false alarm due it malfunctioning again but this time it was due to someone burning food in the wee hours of the morning. The person who set off the building fire alarm due to burnt food has done this multiple times and never opens his windows to let out the smoke. You would think he would learn especially since he is in a corner apartment. I am annoyed with the fact that it went off and woke up the entire building because someone couldn’t keep an eye on their food cooking.

When the fire alarm went off it triggered some anxiety as well as PTSD symptoms. I was in two fires when I was a kid so fire alarms trigger the hell out of me. When the fire alarm went off I quickly got my cat, Lil Gertie, and put her in her carrier and we exited the building. Sadly, many people didn’t exit because they thought it was another malfunction and burnt food but the folks who did evacuate were and are annoyed as hell like I am.

Being highly annoyed, full of anxiety and extremely triggered due to the fire alarm and in my apartment now, I have my music playing. I have my music playing to help me calm the fuck down. The fire alarm going is not conducive to having PTSD or Insomnia especially since I was finally almost asleep. Anyway, having my music on is helping.

Another thing that is helping is that my cat, Lil Gertie, is laying next to me in my chair. She is very calming and surprisingly chill after the fire alarm went off. Yes, she does get startled by the fire alarm and doesn’t fight me getting into her carrier. She appears to calm down once in the carrier because I think she knows she is going to be safe. I love my cat and how quickly she can chill out after the fire alarm goes off.

After I finish this blog post, I plan on continuing to listen to music as I do art work. Specifically, I plan on coloring as it appears to be a type of mindfulness for me. Coloring is very calming for me and am grateful to have it as a skill.

I think I am going to get going now. I plan on listening to music as I color and hopefully am able to get to sleep. I am tired as hell. Having the fire alarm go off when one is almost asleep is a rude awaking and just make one even more tired. But on that note, I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of their weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Late Friday Night Post

Happy Friday, World!!! It is 11:40 at night on a Friday and I am taking a brief break from doing some art work. Specifically, I am taking a break from coloring. I enjoy coloring immensely. Coloring is a type of mindfulness and meditation practice for me.

Part of the reason why I am taking a break from coloring at the moment is that I realize that I am hungry and am eating a snack. In fact, I am having an avocado with sour cream and a cheese quesadilla with sour cream. I know it is late to be eating but I am hungry and thought a snack would be a good idea especially since I am not tired and have a feeling I’ll be up late tonight.

My cat, Lil Gertie, is enjoying the fact that I am not in bed yet. She is enjoying it because she is getting plenty of attention and play time during a time she is typically is awake wondering around the apartment. I love my cat, Lil Gertie, so much. I am so grateful that I adopted her nearly a year and a half ago. It has been one of the best decisions I have made in my life.

As I was eating and writing this blog as well as coloring I have been listening a podcast about philosophy. Specifically, the philosophy podcast I am listening to is Philosophize This. I highly recommend it. I am learning so much about philosophy and even some about history with this particular podcast. I really enjoy the podcast Philosophize This because I am intrigued with what is being discussed.

I think I am going to continue to listen to it till I am caught up to the most recent episode but it will take a while to get caught up. As I listen to the philosophy podcast I will be coloring. As I have mentioned before coloring is form of mindfulness and meditation for me. It helps me get in a good mindset. I really love coloring and plan on giving what I colored to people who I care about as well as to people who have helped me in the past. I am hoping that the big poster that I am coloring to be able to give it to my therapist but it is a slow process at this point in time. Coloring is something I never out grew and never stopped doing. I use to get laughed at in junior high and high school because I colored and now adult coloring is the in thing to do. I am glad I never stopped coloring even though I was bullied for it.

I don’t have much else to say in this post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my hear for reading my blog. I really hope that everyone enjoys their weekend. For those in the United States, I hope you enjoy your three day weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Random Sunday Evening Post

Good Evening, World!!! It is yet another Sunday evening in my corner of the world. I have not really done much today. I am not sure why I have not done much but am grateful that it has been a lazy day for me as it seemed like it was something I needed.

I may have not done much today but I have been productive in little ways today. I did go with a friend who happens to be a neighbor to a local Catholic church to have a free meal. There is Catholic church in my neighborhood that puts on a free meal for homeless and low income people every Sunday afternoon. The cool thing about this meal is that it is not a requirement to go a church service to be able to eat the meal like it is at some other churches around the area. The other cool thing is that this particular Catholic church has been doing this free church for over forty years and there a couple of volunteers that have been volunteering since the church started doing the free meals. In fact many of the volunteers have been volunteering more that twenty years. I think it is extremely cool that people are willing to help low income and homeless individuals. I am grateful to be able to attend this free meal every Sunday with friends who live in my apartment building. This one free meal a week helps me a great deal to save money. Money that I need for other things.

Speaking of money and before I go on to the other semi productive things I have done today, I want to remind you my reader of something. As you might be aware of is that I have advertisements on my blog. Yes, I am well aware of how annoying they are but every time one is clicked on that fully loads I make a cent or two from you just clicking on it. The only way I get paid is when it accumulates to a hundred dollars. I am now on my second round of trying to accumulating one hundred dollars as I finally hit one hundred dollars last month (June). So, it will be highly appreciative if you could click on advertisements so I can make money. I hope to get to another one hundred dollars by the end of November so I can buy holiday presents for family and friends.

Okay, enough with my begging for you to click on to the annoying advertisements for me to earn money and on to what else I have done today. After getting home from the free lunch at the Catholic church I spent the rest of the day doing art and listening to a podcast about philosophy. The type of art I did was coloring a poster for my therapist and painting something for a friend. I listened to a podcast about philosophy because I am really getting into the subject and love learning about it. I am grateful that I am into philosophy and learning about it as do my art work. Being able to learn as I do something creative is always a good thing for me even if some don’t consider it as being productive.

I do not have much more to say without repeating myself so I am going to end this blog post. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things. Again, I want to thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys the rest of their Sunday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Happy Independence Day

Happy Fourth of July, America (and World)!!! Today is Independence Day here in the United States of America. Since it is Independence Day here in the United States which is fondly called the Fourth of July, many people are spending it by celebrating.

For me, celebrating the fourth isn’t what it use to be. Mainly because I worked retail for ten years and I feel like it is too commercialized. Don’t get me wrong I still celebrate it but not like the way I use to especially as a child. Today, I went to a barbecue a friend put on around lunch time. I enjoyed being surrounded by friends and eating food with them for lunch. I was invited to stay but I declined as I had made other plans with some of my neighbors. Neighbors that have become friends. In fact a couple of these neighbors are barbecuing dinner as I write this blog post. I donated meat for this barbecue. After eating we are going to play some board games and then go to the roof of our building to watch the fireworks.

As far as the fireworks go, I don’t think my cat, Lil Gertie, will react to them as she seemed pretty chill last night when someone was light off fireworks in front of our building. I love my cat so much and if I think she would react I would give her some of her anxiety meds. I am grateful that I have had pets throughout my life that didn’t seem to be affected by fireworks. I do know that many pets have issues with the noise as well as the brightness of fireworks. As far as my pet cat, Lil Gertie, I am preparing a “safe place” for her as a precaution. Her safe place is usually my bedroom and bathroom with treats and her favorite toys.

I don’t have much more to say. I should really go and help my neighbors with the barbecue. I want to thank you all for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has great day and for those who live in the United States, please enjoy your Fourth of July and stay safe. Again, thank you for reading my blog. You are all awesome in my eyes. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Day

Good Evening, World!!! I am slightly struggling at the moment. I wish I wasn’t struggling but sadly I am. I am specifically struggling with the symptoms of both my anxiety and depression. Having symptoms from both act up at the same time is a hell in of itself yet it appears that I always tend to pick myself up from dealing with both at the same time.

Despite dealing with intense depression and anxiety symptoms I managed to hang out with a couple of friends. My friends and I decided we would go out and have a late lunch early dinner. We went to a local diner we had never been to and love the food as well as the service. As much as I didn’t want hang out with friends or go out to eat, I am grateful I did both. It got me out of my apartment and my head. It is never a good thing for me to isolate so hanging out with friends was a good decision for me.

Now that I have been home for a couple of hours, I realize that I am getting stuck in my head again. I went to turn on the television and well poof a political debate was on just about every channel. I knew it was going to be on tonight and tomorrow but I wasn’t paying attention to the time so I when I realized it was on I turned off the television and now I am writing this blog post. Don’t get me wrong about not wanting to watch the political debate but since I haven’t educated myself on all twenty candidates I don’t want to watch the debate. I know I will watch political debates when the election gets closer.

Since the political debate is on I am going to listen to podcast on philosophy. The philosophy podcast I am going to listen to is called “Philosophize This.” I will be listening to it from my laptop via Spotify. I am learning a great deal about philosophy from this podcast because I listen to it and then look up some of what is discussed in the podcast. I love to learn about new things especially if helps me have educated conversations.

As I listen to “Philosophize This,” I will be doing some art. The type of art I will be doing is coloring. I am coloring a poster that I have been coloring on and off since late 2016. It is my goal to finish it so I can give it to my current therapist as a thank you. The poster I am coloring has an awesome saying that is great when it comes to the therapeutic relationship. I am hoping that when I am finished with it that I take a picture of it to share with you.

I do not have much more to say so I guess I will end this post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s 7:11 AM & It’s Time for a Slurpee from 7Eleven

Good Morning, World!!! Like I mentioned in my last post, I didn’t sleep all that well last night but I did get some sleep. I wish I was able to get more consistent sleep and being able to sleep longer than four hours. Having insomnia sucks but hopefully a sleep specialist will be able to help when I see one at the end of July.

Well, it is 7:11 in the morning and guess what time it is. It is time for a Slurpee from 7-Eleven. I love Slurpee’s and the junk food I get from 7-Eleven. To me 7-Eleven is like me being a kid in a candy store. I miss some of the ole school candy they use to sell but don’t do anymore. When I went to 7-Eleven I got my Cherry flavored Slurpee as well as Bar-Be-Que chips, Sour Cream and Onion chips, a butt load of candy and three cherry Pepsi’s. So I got a bunch of junk food for breakfast even though I won’t eat all in one setting.

I do not have much more to say. I want to thank everyone for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a good day and rest of their work week. Peace Out, World!!!