Intro to Poetry; Day 6: Screens

Damn You, Covid-19

by Gertie

Staring at a computer screen all day give me a headache

but the headache is well worth it as it is

because I love my new job more than I realize.

A job that is helping me along my career path even though staring at a 

computer screen all day isn’t the most fun thing in the world to do.

I don’t blame my career choice for me staring at the computer

all day; I blame this stupid ass

pandemic known as Covid-19.

If Covid-19 didn’t happen, meeting clients in person;

face to face would be happing and not having to do

virtual appointment would be ideal to not having to stare a stupid computer screen

all day.

Damn you Covid-19, you are causing me to get migraines due to

staring at a computer screen all day;

just to help my clients.

The migraines are well worth it though as

helping my clients is the best feeling in the world.

A Season of Change

Happy Holidays, World!!! It has been six weeks since my last blog. I do not have an excuse to why have not blogged in the last month and a half. It was just pure laziness. It is my hope that I will start doing what I did on several different occasions. In fact I hope to restart my plans for blogging this Sunday, December 13th. I plan on starting my “Weekly Plans” post this Sunday. Starting, Saturday, December 19th, I plan on doing my “Weekly Check-In” post. Part of the reason why I stopped these post was because of my current job schedule but thankfully, I will be able to start them back up.

The reason why I will be able to start them back up is because tomorrow (Saturday) night will my last shift at my current employer. I put in my notice because, I will be starting a new job on Wednesday, December 16th as a Peer Specialist. It is a fulltime office job. It Monday through Friday during typical office hours. I am having some pretty high anxiety with starting a new job especially since it is fulltime. I know I will do okay with it but I am still anxious as hell.

Another reason why I am so nervous is because of my cat, Billie Dean. Billie is use to me being gone for work once a week for about fourteen hours as well as a once week volunteer shift for about four hours. Now, Billie will deal with me being gone for about ten hours a day for five days a week. Plus, one day week I will gone for about four hours due to volunteering. Billie is a real lovey dovey type of cat that wants his person home as much as possible so I worry about possible separation anxiety on his part. On a plus note, I will be able to work from home about half the time so I am sure this will help Billie the Cat get adjusted to my new work schedule. I love my cat so much and don’t want to put him in any type of stress.

I don’t have much more to say. I do want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a great evening world. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings from Work

Hello, World!!! It is the middle of the night in my corner of the world. In fact, I am currently at work. I work an overnight shift for twelve plus hours every Saturday night. I am not a big fan of night shifts nor am I fan of having a twelve plus hour work shift. Even though I am not a fan of a couple of things regarding my job, I am glad that I have a job. Many people are out of work due to the pandemic which is why I am grateful for my job.

As many people are aware of if they live in the United States, is that the West Coast of the United States is having some really bad wild fires. Due to the fires California, Oregon and Washington all have very hazardous air quality. As someone who was born in California and spent the first sixteen years of their life there, I remember horrific air quality. Nothing like it is now. I currently reside in Seattle and have never seen Seattle’s air quality this bad. Hell, I never seen California’s air quality as bad as it is there right now. Something that the mayor of Seattle is shut down all the parks and beaches from Friday till Sunday due to the air quality. I understand why she did it but I think people realize how bad the air is by just looking out their windows. But then again people lack common sense, now a days.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do, however want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Sunday a head of them. Peace Out, World!!!

A Pre-Work Post

Good Evening, World!!! I am now awake and about to get ready for work. Part of me doesn’t want to go to work. The part of me that doesn’t want to go to work is the part where my depression symptoms are acting up. I know ultimately me going to work will help with my depression symptoms. As much as I do not like night shifts, I am grateful to have a job for several reasons. One such reason is that working does help with my mental health symptoms.

The part I don’t like about working is the fact, I am away from my cat, Billie Dean. Billie is my emotional support animal (ESA) and helps me a great deal. On a plus note, coming home from work or any other place, having Billie greet me at the door is always an awesome feeling.

As I type this blog I realize that I need to put my art supplies in my backpack so I can take them to work. Specifically, my coloring supplies. I take my coloring supplies so I can color at work to help keep myself busy. I have a lot of down time at work. I love to color. It is a type of meditation for me.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of thing that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Post About the Fear I Have for the People I Serve

Good Morning, World!!! At this very moment I am at work. I have been at work for ten and a half hours. I have another two and a half hours left of my shift. I am tired as hell. I will be eager to get home for many reasons but I need to get some shit off of my chest.

I work with homeless individuals for young adults. Many of whom aged out of the foster care system and have a major distrust of the police. Anyway, I work in a shelter that is in Downtown Seattle. Right in the middle of where the riots are. The thing that pisses me off is that many of the police officers have accused some of the young adults of looting. Sadly, many of the folks being accused are people of color and the police officers that are doing the accusing are white. I know for a fact that the young adults I work with were involved with the peaceful protest and had absolutely nothing to do with the riots as they didn’t want to be apart in harming their community. Many of the young adults were harassed by white police officers as they were trying to get to shelter. Many of the folks I work with just want justice for George Floyd and many other like Mr. Floyd that were senselessly murdered by white cops.

I just hope that people realize that the murder of George Floyd needs to be dealt with. I say this because people of color live in fear everyday of their life that some white person or even worse a white cop will kill them. I worry most about the homeless folks who are of color as they get harassed even more than other people. Please lets all just take care of each other.

As I end this post here at work, there is still a major police presence and the National Guard is present as well. Sadly, people are still committing arson as well as looting. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you have taken the time to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Sunday. Please protest peacefully. Stay safe while you are out protesting. I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Peace Out, World!!!

Full of Anxiety about Job Interview

Good Morning, World. Right now I am full of anxiety regarding my job interview later on this morning. I am not sure why I am anxious about it but I am. Personally, I am always anxious before job interviews.

On the plus note about my job interview is that the weather is nice out here in Seattle. That means I do not have to wear a jacket or sweater which can be a bit cumbersome at a job interview especially when you depend on public transportation or car services like Lyft.

Right now the hard part for me is trying to keep my cat, Billie, from sitting on my lap. As much as I would love for my cat, Billie, to be on my lap, I want to limit the amount of hair I get on me. Sadly, I don’t have one of those lint rollers. I totally forgot to buy one when I was at the store last night.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys their Wednesday. If you live in Seattle, I hope you enjoy the weather. Peace Out, World!!!

A Before I Leave for Work Post

Good Evening, World!!! I am up for the day and mostly ready for work. Overall, I slept pretty well. Even though I woke up earlier than I would have liked at least I know I woke up naturally and not by rude and noisy neighbors. In fact this was the first Saturday that I was not woken up by the same two loud and noisy neighbors on the patio in about a month. Just grateful to not be woken up so rudely.

As I type this blog post, my cat, Billie Dean is laying in my lap. I love the fact that he is in my lap at moment because my anxiety is high at the moment. Also, another reason I love the fact he is in my lap is that I won’t be able have cuddle time with him tonight due to the fact I’ll be at work for more that twelve hours.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I just want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a great rest of your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Midnight Post

Hello, World!!! It is midnight in my corner of the world. I am staying up all night due to the fact I have to sleep all day. I need to sleep all day on Saturday’s because I work a twelve and a half hour night shift. I really enjoy my current job with the exception of it being a night shift. I am not a big fan of it being twelve and a half hours but I think if it was a day time shift I would be more accepting of a twelve and a half hour shift. My colleagues are great and it feels like a family type environment. The clients I work with are awesome. My supervisor is super supportive. I think the reason I have stayed at my current job for so long is because of my colleagues and supervisor as well as it being a supportive environment. The main reason I am looking for a new job is I don’t do well with a night shift.

Speaking of looking for a new job, I mentioned in an earlier post, I have a job interview at a local mental health agency. I hope I get the job because I love working in supportive housing. I also love being employed as a peer support specialist also known as a peer counselor. I am trying to not get my hopes up high about getting the job because if I don’t get it, I don’t really want to be let down. No matter what if I don’t get it the job, I will be let down but if I keep my expectations low then the let down won’t be so hard. I am looking forward to the interview because I will consider it practice especially if I don’t get the job.

Anyway on to something completely different. One of the ways I will keep myself from falling asleep is doing some art. I will be doing different mediums (genres) of art. I will be doing some coloring, painting and some collage. I most likely be combining the collage with some painting. I love my completed art work when it combines painting and collage. It is very interesting. I also enjoy giving my art away. People wonder why I don’t sell it. I don’t sell it because I don’t think its worth very much. I also love being able to give people hand made gifts.

The best part of Friday nights is that I get to spend the entire night awake with my cat, Billie Dean. I really think he appreciates when I don’t sleep at night because that way I spend the night playing with him and being awake with him. I love my cat so much. I really enjoy the fact that he is a cuddle bug. I think if it were up to him, he would spend all of his time in my lap.

I do not have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Saturday. I also hope everyone has an awesome weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

Still Gloomy but Hopeful

Good Afternoon, World!!! My depression is still acting up a little bit. Wish it wasn’t but it is something that I have dealt with for as long as I can remember. The gloomy weather isn’t helping much but it also makes me feel slightly better knowing the weather fits my mood.

Even though my mood is still low, I am hopeful. Even in my last post I was hopeful but now I am even more hopeful. I am at my grandpa’s spending time with him and doing my laundry. I am grateful for my family especially my grandpa. Not very many 40+ year olds still have a grandparent left which is why I am extremely grateful to have my grandpa in my life.

Another reason why I am feeling hopeful is that I have a job interview next week at a local mental health agency for a peer specialist position. The peer position is for supportive housing and thankfully I have experience working in supportive housing as well as a peer. I am hopeful that I could be on the short list but I wouldn’t be surprised if I don’t get the job. The reason being is that the job is at the mental health agency I am a client of.  Yes, it is okay to be employed as a peer at the agency where you are a client at just as long as you don’t work for the program you are a client of. In fact my employment specialist made sure it was okay before I applied. Again, I am hopeful that I will be on the short list but realistically know that they most likely won’t hire a client and I am okay with that. At least I will have the experience of an interview.

Anyway after I am done writing this post, I am going to start reading a book. Not sure which one as I brought two to choose from. Both of which are science fiction books. I really enjoy science fiction and fantasy genres. I really enjoy reading. I will let you know what book I am reading and hope to let you know what I think of it after I am finished with the book.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. In fact I hope everyone has a great weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

Friday Morning Post

Good Morning, World!!! I hope everyone is having a good Friday. My cat woke me up this morning my gently nudging my arm with her head. I knew that she wanted both attention and food with the gentle nudges. So, I of course gave her both. Lil Gertie was appreciative of both. Right now she is laying on my chest as I am writing this post on my laptop. Yes it is slightly challenging but I am grateful for Lil Gertie laying on my chest as it is helping me focus on my breath which is helping my anxiety.

I want to update you on my dad. He is doing as well as expected after having emergency surgery on Wednesday afternoon. He sadly is still in pain which is to be expected but I wish he wasn’t in pain. On a good note in regards to my dad is that he is using his sense of humor. My dad using his sense of humor is a good thing because it means he is doing better.

My friends and fellow peer counselors/specialist having been checking up on how I have been doing since I had to leave the peer conference early due to the fact my dad had emergency surgery. Having awesome friends checking up on how both myself and dad are doing is a great feeling. Knowing that I have friends checking up on me is just another reminder that people do care about me. I am grateful for my friends and that they check up on me.

Now lets discuss work. I am taking Saturday off because I wasn’t sure how serious the situation with my dad was going to be so I was able to get someone to cover my shift. I am grateful that I have amazing colleagues willing to step up to the plate when a family emergency arises.

Since I am now on the topic of work, I want to share with you something that I think is cool that happened at the peer conferences. On Tuesday, shortly after finding out about my dad, I was sitting in the hospitality room as part of my volunteer duties and starting talking with another peer. A peer who works for an agency I applied for a job at. To find out this peer advocated for this position and has been able to look at the resumes while her boss was out of the office on a honeymoon. This peer informed me that she is not apart of the interview or hiring process but will able to put some input in, in regards to the resumes she discusses with her supervisor. The cool thing about this is that this peer looked at my name tag and said she remembers seeing my resume and was “impressed” with it. She also said if it were up to her, that I would be on the “short list.” The best part about attending peer conferences or any other type of conferences in the mental health field is the networking. I am grateful that I was able to network with a lot of peers during this conference but I want to thank the universe for the interaction I had with the peer I just told you about because, there is a chance that I could at least get an interview. I hope to inform you more about what the job is all about in a later post but I think it will be a good fit for me. Especially since it is a part time position and that it involves working a drop in center which I have experience in. I think this could help my career if I get the job. This is one of the many reasons I love going to conferences is because of the networking.

I don’t have much more to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. I also hope everyone has a great weekend and for those who live in the United States I hope you have a great three day weekend. Peace Out, World!!!