The Basic’s of the Reality of Self Care & Self Love

Happy Midnight from my corner of the world which is Seattle, Washington. As I stated it is midnight here in Seattle and it appears that I am unable to sleep. At this point in time I don’t think it is insomnia that is keeping me up.

The reason why I am thinking it is not insomnia as I have been doing to some good self care after the toe infection I have been dealing with. Even though I am suppose to be staying off of it, I am have been doing some major chores around my apartment. Specifically, I have been cleaning it as it is in desperate need of a major cleaning. The lack of cleanliness hasn’t been good for my depression which is why I am been cleaning about thirty minutes day. While cleaning I have been listening to music. Specifically, I have been listening to my Recovery Music list to keep me motivated.

Another thing that has helping me stay motivated is by doing mindfulness and meditation practices. Practicing mindfulness and meditation as helped me stat focused on what I need to do for good self care as well as good self love. Self love is extremely challenging for me which is why I am doing my best to do things that create self love in myself by doing mindfulness and meditation practices on a daily schedule.

As part of my self care, I am starting read books for fun again. I noticed when I read for fun it helps me go on a mini vacation without costing too much money. It could be done in many situations and can also be considered a form of mindfulness.

Oh an lets not forget about reading comic books. Comic books is a great way to do good self care as well as an awesome form of self love. Comic books has a way for me to believe in myself in ways other types of reading material may not be quite as helpful.

I recently bought some magazines regarding mindfulness, meditation , journaling as well as creativity to help me continue on good self care and good self love. Of course all this will be help me especially if I stick to it like I plan to. Journaling will be a good help with my recovery.

The one thing that helps me everyday, multiple times a day to stay grounded is my cat Billie Dean. Billie has been a great help with staying in the reality of doing good self care and self love. I love my cat Billie so much and am grateful for being able to having as a mindfulness exercise multiple times a day.

On a plus note I was able to go to work today (Friday) and was thrilled about it. I love being a Peer Support Specialist which is why I am focusing on self-care and self-love.

I do not have much more to say i this particular blog. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog; it truly is greatly appreciated. Now it is time to say goodnight now that is it midnight Seattle time. Plus it is time to cuddled with my precious kitty Billie Dean aka Billie the Kat aka Billie. I have everyone has great night ahead of them. Have an awesome weekend ahead and don’t forget to do good self care. You my readers are just very awesome people. Thank you for reading my blog. Good Night and Peace Out, World!!!

The Day That Changed My Life, Again

Good Evening, World!!! Today marks exactly three years since I adopted my last cat Lil Gertie. I miss her a great deal and wish I had more time with her. Sadly, I only had a year and a half with her before she crossed over the rainbow bridge.

The therapist I had three years ago suggested getting an Emotional Support Animal (ESA). We discussed why it would be good for my recovery and help reduce the symptoms of my mental health challenges. So, I decided to adopt a cat from PAWS Cat City here in Seattle. I connected with Lil Gertie at first site. She changed my life in so many ways.

One of the ways that she changed my life is that she gave me something to focus on other than myself and what I was struggling with. She gave me a purpose I was lacking when I adopted her. She helped me gain self confidence and self worth.

Due to the self confidence and self worth I gained, I was able to go back to work. Going back to work even though it was part time for just over two years helped me not just with my self worth and self confidence, it helped me realize what I wanted to do with my life which was to be a peer support specialist again. Now, I can happily say I am once again a peer support specialist and working fulltime.

Sadly, Lil Gertie couldn’t see me become a peer support specialist again because she crossed over the rainbow bridge on Thanksgiving Day of 2019. Lil Gertie received a cancer diagnosis in October of 2019 and she was given six months to live, maybe nine months. When I was given this news I started the volunteer process to become a volunteer at PAWS Cat City. It was in the middle of this process that Lil Gertie had a mini stroke on Thanksgiving Day and made the decision that it was best to end her suffering by having the vet help her cross the rainbow bridge. Yes, I was with Lil Gertie when she crossed over.

Despite loosing Lil Gertie in the middle of the process of becoming a volunteering PAWS Cat City, I continued the process. I continued as I knew it would not only help me with my grief of loosing Lil Gertie, I wanted to help cat find their furrever homes and to help people find their new best friend. I had my first shift at PAWS Cat City in January of 2020.

It was while on a volunteer shift at PAWS Cat City, that Billie Dean my current cat and I fell in love with each other. I put him on hold to get the what I needed for him and adopted him the next day. Billie has been apart of my life for just over a year now and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Yes, I miss Lil Gertie and love her with all my heart but I wouldn’t change anything for the world. Today, is the day she changed my life forever and for the better.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope everyone has a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 2: Write A List

Things I’ve Learned In Recovery

  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skills
  • Setting boundaries
  • The love my family has for me
  • Friends and family I can depend on
  • To not take life too seriously
  • Some days are going to be tougher than other days and that is okay
  • Mistakes are teachable moments as well as lessons learned
  • It’s okay if the only I thing do is get out of bed; some days are going to be like that
  • Helping others helps me; but make sure I put myself first or I might not be able to help others in a health way
  • Working helps me with my recovery and gives me a sense of purpose
  • Volunteering not only helps with my depression and other diagnosis it helps the community at large
  • Building a community the accepts me as me
  • Being in more that one community is a good thing
  • Having an emotional support animal (ESA) to take careĀ  to help with depression (currently my cat, Billie Dean)
  • Doing self care is not selfish

Intro to Poetry; Day 3: Friend

Billie Dean

by Gertie

Boy oh boy,

I didn’t realize how much I would fall in

Love with you and how much that

Love grows each day.

I love your facial

Expressions and your

Damn crinkly

Ear is what caused me to fall in love with you and your

Awesomeness.

Never stop being my lovebug.

A Snowy Valentines Day

Good Evening, World!!! It’s been a snowy weekend here in Seattle. Personally, I am not a fan of snow. Hell, most people who reside in Seattle loathe the snow. I just wish the snow would hurry up and melt the fuck away.

As many of you know today is Valentine’s Day. I have never been a fan of Valentine’s Day as I never understood why we need a special day to tell those we care about that we love them. To add on top of why I am not a fan of Valentines Day is today marks three years since my grandma passed away. She passed away due to complications of Parkinson’s Disease. Parkinson’s is a hellish illness and I don’t wish it on my worst enemy. I took my grandma’s death quite hard as she and my grandpa helped my dad raise me. I am forever grateful for grandma and the love she gave me.

Billie Dean, my cat helped me get through today and the three year anniversary of my grandmother’s death. Billie has been more cuddling than he normally is and he is quite a cuddling kitty. I love Billie so much and I consider him my Valentine’s Day date. It is nice to know, that no matter how sucky a day is, is that my cat, Billie is here for me. I love my cat so much. I love the fact that he is helping through the grief of the three year anniversary of my grandma’s death.

I do not have much else to say in this particular blog post. I do wan to thank for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Happy Valentine’s Day and Peace Out, World!!!

1 Year Ago of Billie’s Gotcha Day

Good Afternoon, World!!! Today February 6th 2021 marks one year since I adopted my cat, Billie Dean from PAWS Cat City. Today is what I call Gotcha Day. I love my cat, Billie so very much. I will be posting pictures in the post of Billie. For those readers who have a visual impairment, WordPress allows me to put captions in the picture and I hope that your device allows you to read it the way it is suppose to help you as I know you are not able to see the pictures.

Billie with a gift wrap bow on his back like a present. Even thought Billie was not a Christmas present he sure is a present that came at the right time for me a year ago today February 6th.
Billie helping open Christmas gifts.
Billie just chilling all stretched out on a middle level of his cat tree.
Billie eating his wet food

I love Billie so much and am grateful he came into my life. I hope you enjoyed the picture of my beloved Billie. I don’t know what I would have done to cope with Covid-19 without Billie. I am happy that I adopted Billie before Covid-19 became a major issue here in Seattle as well as the rest of the United States.

I don’t have much more to say expect thank you. I appreciate that you read my blog and hope you continue to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Billie the Cat Wasn’t Amused

Happy Holidays, World!!! This is my cat, Billie Dean. Also known as Billie the Cat. The above pictures are of my cat, Billie who has some reindeer antlers on. For those who are visually impaired, may not be able to see Billie’s facial expression and just wanted to tell you that his face clearly states that he is not amused. I did put captions with what I thought he was thinking. I love my cat so much. Anyway, I thought I would share the pictures to help spread the holiday cheers.

Before ending this post, I want to wish you all a happy holiday season. I also want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Happy Holidays and Peace Out, World!!!

Yet, Another Post About my Depression

Good Afternoon, World!!! It is two days shy of a month since I last blogged. I do not have an excuse of why I haven’t blogged in nearly a month. Or at least an excuse that I feel okay with because there isn’t an excuse good enough for why I haven’t blogged.

Right now my depression is acting up. I am wondering if the increased depression is due to the time of year or due to Covid-19 or due to the up coming elections here in the United States or all of the above. No matter the reason the why I am dealing with increased depression symptoms at least I am aware of it and that it is currently a mild case for me. I know I shouldn’t be dismissive of my depression symptoms as being “mild,” its just that they could be much, much worse.

As far as trying to make myself feel better, spending time with my cat, Billie Dean is quite helpful. Billie is very much a cuddly cat and loves to spend as much time as he can on my lap. I love Billie so much and am grateful for his unconditional love. The love of an animal is the best feeling in the world.

Another way, I am going to do to help with the depression is to read. I most likely will read the fantasy/science fiction book that I am currently reading. Reading helps me cope with my reality. It helps me forget my reality for an hour or two at time without doing harm to myself.

I do not have much more to say as I want to go read. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. I am greatly appreciative that you have chosen to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Just a Post About Dealing with Depression

Hello, World!!! For some reason my depression has decided to rear its ugly head. Yes, I have been feeling a little meh lately but part of that is due to the isolation this stupid pandemic put us in. The depression I am experiencing is not the meh feeling have been dealing with. The depression I am feeling, feels like the typical depression I experience which sucks but at least it is something I am aware of. Being aware of it is helpful as I know what I can do to help fight it off or least not make it worse.

Honestly, the weather sort of fits my mood but at least I know its not the weather causing my depression or at least not adding to it. Right now it is raining in Seattle. Actually it is the normal Seattle mist type of rain. I have been wanting this weather due to the poor air quality due to all the wild fires that are happening. Plus this weather is letting me wear my flannels and I love my flannels.

I am hoping the weather last as I love to be able to have an excuse to stay home with my cat, Billie Dean. I am so grateful for the unconditional love that Billie gives me. He has helped a great deal with my depression.

Billie not only helps with my depression, he also tries to help me with my art work. Tonight the genre of art work I have been doing is coloring. Billie has been laying on the picture I have been coloring or trying to bite the colored pencil I would use. I take it he just wants to help.

As I colored to help with the depression, I also listened to a podcast. A podcast about philosophy. The philosophy podcast I am listening to is called Philosophize This. In fact, Steven West, the podcaster of Philosophize This is from Seattle which I personally think is cool since I live in Seattle. Anyway, I really enjoy Philosophize This and learning about philosophy.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank each one of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Photography: Developing Your Eye I; Day One: Home

Good Morning, World!!! Today, I am starting a WordPress course on photography. Today’s topic is “home” and for me home wouldn’t be home without my cat; Billie Dean. For me there is no place like home without my cat. Billie gives me unconditional love. Unconditional love that humans cannot give me. Below it the picture of my cat, Billie. For those who are site impaired, I included a caption with the photo of Billie.

Billie Dean sitting in a box staring off into LaLa Land.