Monday Moodiness

Good Evening, World!!! Right now, I am realizing that I have been moody most of the day. I have been moody for many reasons. My depression is acting up. My grief dealing with my grandma hit me like a tsunami today. Oh yeah and that weather sucks shit.

It doesn’t help things that I have been isolating myself today. Not sure why I am isolating today but I have. I did email my therapist and primary care doctor about the depression, grief and isolation. Both my doctor and therapist reminded me of my appointments with them tomorrow which I know will be quite helpful for me. My therapist also informed that I do have refills for my psych meds as he talked with the “shrink on duty.” So, at least I know I have meds for the next two weeks.

My cat, Lil Gertie, has been of great help to me today. She has been laying by my side on my share or laying on my lap. She even let me hold her for about ten minutes as I paced around my apartment. She usually only lets me hold her for about two to three minutes max. She is an awesome emotional support animal. Right now she is taking some “me time” by sleeping on my bed. Everyone needs some space at times and she has done a very good job with supporting me today so she deserves the “me time.”

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Knowing that I have perfect strangers that care about me and that I am able to help by sharing my story helps me get through tough days like today. I hope everyone has a good rest of your Monday. Enjoy your week with whatever you are doing. Peace Out, World!!!

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Still Sleepless In Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! Yes, it is still morning in my neck of the world. It is now 7:15 in the morning in Seattle and I still haven’t been to sleep even though I have tried many times and many ways.

As I mentioned in my last post, I used meditation and mindfulness practices as well as meds. I did take an extra dose of both my anxiety meds and sleeping meds with permission from the doctor on call yet it didn’t help. I also attempted to watch television that is know for it’s comedy and humor which helps a good portion of the time but this time it didn’t help like I was wanting it to.

So, what I decided to do next was to spend time with my cat as she is quite helpful with helping me with my PTSD and anxiety and she helped a great deal. She is now sleeping next to me in my chair as I write this post.

Another thing I have been doing is hopes to help me sleep is reading. I have been reading comic books. Specifically, I have been reading Wonder Woman comic books as Wonder Woman gives me sense of strength to do what I need to do. Yes, I know I am getting strength from a fictional character but if it helps me with whatever I am going through which on this moment is attempting trying to get to sleep then I’ll use it.

So, as I say good morning (and goodnight again) I hope you all have a good day. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Have an awesome day. Peace out, world!!!

Needing Some Zzz’s In Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! It is 2:30 in the morning in my corner of the world and I am unable to sleep despite everything I have tried to get to sleep. Let’s begin what I know is keeping me up and the corrupts are anxiety and PTSD. Both really suck any time of day especially when you are trying to get to sleep.

Now lets get to how I have attempted to get to sleep so far. I started off with taking some Melatonin and then doing both a mindfulness and meditation practice after watching late night television. Late night television is quite helpful for me with my sleep as humor and comedy help a great deal as does doing mindfulness and meditation practices after late night television. I decided to take melatonin for the first time and took it an hour before I knew I was going to go to bed. Unfortunately, melatonin, late night television with humor and comedy as well as mindfulness and meditation practices didn’t help me get to sleep. So, that is when I took my anxiety medicine in hopes that it would help me get sleepy enough to get to sleep. Sadly this did not work either. So, I tried my new sleeping med and it appears that it is not working either. It is quite frustrating for me to not be able to sleep. My next step is take a benadryl and watch M*A*S*H in hopes that it can be helpful for some sleep.

Well, I hope everyone has a good night or morning or evening depending where they are in the world. I am saying goodnight in hopes to getting some sleep. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you read my blog. I am grateful for each one of you. Peace Out, World!!!

No Zzz’s In Seattle

Hello, World!!! It is just a few minutes after two in the morning in my corner of the world. I am unable to sleep and it is starting to piss me off. I think it is pissing me off more than usual that I can not sleep because my health insurance company is being a butthead in regards to covering my new sleep med. I don’t think it is too much to ask to look over a piece of paper that was faxed over last week on two different occasions. It is just infuriating as hell when one is waiting on a decision that could effect one’s health and mental health.

On a plus note Lil Gertie successfully took most of her meds to treat her asthma and allergies. Granted it wasn’t the full dose but at least it was most of it. So far she hasn’t had any coughing attacks since taking the meds. I am hoping that the meds are working as I love Lil Gertie. She has become family and I don’t want to loose her. I know asthma is treatable it just worries me.

I know all this worrying isn’t helping with the insomnia and I am hoping that with posting about it, that it could be helpful for me to get some sleep. Sleep that is much needed if I am to remain healthy myself.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. I think I am going to attempt getting some sleep once again. Your readership is greatly appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Worries of the Night

Hello, World!!! It is now twelve thirty in the morning in my corner of the world. I am still up due to watching late night television. Late night television helps me deal with life in general especially today. I say this because Lil Gertie has given me a couple of days due some coughing episodes and today’s coughing episodes were scary and worrisome. So, I took her to the vet. The vet diagnosed her with allergies and mild asthma even though the vet didn’t hear wheezing. She determined the mild asthma diagnosis by watching the two videos I took of Lil Gertie’s coughing attacks. The vet, Dr. B, said I did the right thing with the videos.

Another thing that I am worried about is the sleeping meds and my health insurance being slow to approve the pre-authorization for it. It is tough to be dealing with lack of sleep but am grateful for what little sleep I do get especially when I don’t have anything to help with it.

I do not have much more to say. I think I am going try to get some shut eye. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a good night. Peace Out, World!!!

Wednesday Ramblings

Good Morning, World!!! I did end up getting some sleep last night. I got about three hours even though it is still not enough sleep, I will take any sleep I can. I hope the sleeping med situation with my insurance company is taken care of soon.

I don’t have anything planned for today. It is a see what comes up type of day. I do know that I will need to get out of my apartment at some point because if I don’t it might turn into one of them days. I don’t know why it feels like but it does.

I am excited about my new job even though I don’t know when my first shift will be. I hope it is soon. I am not sure if I like everything about it. The reason why is because it is at night and is a twelve hour shift. But the thing about it is, is that it is only one to two days a week.

I don’t have much more to say in this post. I appreciate everyone who reads my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has an awesome day. Again, thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Jobless, No More & Other Stuff

Hello, World!!! I got a job over yesterday to be an on-call shelter counselor at a local drop-in center for homeless youth and young adults which does an overnight shelter for young adults. This morning I accepted the job offer. It may not exactly be the job I want however I know from experience that you’re more likely to get a job if you are already working. I am hoping that working even as an on call staff will be helpful with me getting a Peer Specialist job.

I was able to tell my therapist the good news today. We discussed both the benefits and down falls of going back to work. We both agreed that the benefits out way the down falls of going back to work. We also discussed other aspect of my life that I am not willing to share with you at the moment.

Now on to the issue I am having with my meds. My new sleeping med is now not being covered by my insurance yet they paid for it last week but not this week. I need a pre-authorization and my doctor filled it out and faxed it on three different occasions the last two days yet my insurance company claimed they didn’t receive none of the pre-authorization forms.  Dealing with the insurance company regarding my sleep medication doesn’t help with my sleep. It is actually making my lack of sleep even worse.

Speaking of sleep I think I got about an hour and last night which is more than I got on Sunday night. I really hope I am able to sleep tonight because if I don’t I am afraid I might be a cranky bucket tomorrow when I call the insurance company again as well as my doctor regarding my sleeping med.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is very much appreciated. I hope you have a good night (or day). Peace Out, World!!!