Weekly Check-In

Good Evening, World!!! It is that time of week where I do my weekly check-in. I do not have much to discuss in this week’s weekly check-in. The major thing that has happened is the fact that my grandpa took a major fall yesterday while on errands. He has a broken jaw and nose as well as being in extreme pain. He is currently in the ICU due to his blood count being out of whack. He is 93 and I hope he gets out of the hospital soon.

As far as everything else, I have been depressed and isolating. While isolating I have been reading a pretty awesome book and doing some art work. The book I am reading is the second book in a series that I am enjoying. As far as the art work goes, I have been coloring a giant poster as well as some rock painting. When I do art work I also listen to some music. The music I have been listening to is from my recovery playlist that I created.

I have also been spending time with my cat, Billie. I love my cat so very much. I cannot imagine my life without my cat Billie, in it. He is an amazing kitty and I am grateful that he is a lap cat that loves spending time with me.

I do not have much more to discuss in this week’s weekly check-in and I will keep you all updated about my grandpa. I do want to thank you the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Somewhat Of A Challenging Night

Good Morning, World!!! I am tired as I didn’t sleep well last night. I didn’t sleep well last night due to the fact I was in so much pain that Junior ended up taking me to the hospital. Turns out that I have a kidney infection in the right kidney. I also have kidney stones as I had to have an MRI despite being pregnant. MRI’s, CT scans and X-Rays are not the best for pregnant people however the pain I was (and still am) experiencing could cause distress to the baby which causes harm. So, Junior and I with the help of the doctors weighed out the risk and thought it’s better to do the MRI. The MRI confirmed kidney stones.

Having kidney stones and a kidney infection is not fun especially since I am unable to take the pain meds doctors normally would prescribe. I am unable to take the pain meds due to being pregnant. On that note, I am able to take antibiotics for the kidney infection which is a good thing. The doctors put me on ten days worth of antibiotics and informed me to get in to see the OBGYN as soon as possible to make sure the kidney infection is clearing up and pain subsiding from the kidney stones.

I am just happy that Junior was able to take me to the emergency room and that what I am dealing with can be treated. I wish I was able to get some sleep but I am glad that the doctors were able to figure out what was wrong with me health wise.

I do not have much more to write about in the particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Post About Therapy

Good Evening, World!!! I had therapy today and it was a virtual appointment as it has been for the last year due to me working. My next appointment will be an in person appointment which I am thrilled about. My therapist and I will attempt to make a more set schedule for in person appointments now that I am not currently working.

My therapist and I of course discussed being pregnant. We discussed how being pregnant most likely will trigger my PTSD due to having the OBGYN checking me down below the belt on the monthly basis while pregnant. We discussed the things I could do to help me if I get triggered by getting examined by the OBGYN.

We also discussed a hard traumatic event that happened to me when I was a child. My therapist validated this experience and reiterated that I am not the monster despite me feeling like a monster. My therapist is really awesome and I am grateful that she is a safe person to talk with and that she makes therapy a safe place.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Daily Prompt; What’s Your Dream Job

Bloganuary writing prompt
What’s your dream job?

My dream job is being a peer specialist that works in the emergency room of a hospital. I would love to be able to help those at the most challenging time of their life whether it is mental health related or physical health related. Having someone there to help a patient in the emergency room could ultimately help them get the best care possible. I just think emergency rooms could benefit from having a peer specialist in them.

Hump Day Update

Good Evening, World!!! It is that time of week where I do a mid week update in which I like to call hump day update due to it being Wednesday. As I mentioned in my last post, I had my first OBGYN appointment yesterday after medically confirming last Friday with my primary care provider that I am pregnant. The OBGYN discussed the risk of being pregnant in your mid forties and that many people have healthy babies. The OBGYN also discussed my mental health diagnosis and her concerns about postpartum depression which is understandable and I will be working with her and my mental health treatment team about it. Junior and I are looking forward to being parents.

I have also been applying for jobs. Jobs that can be challenging especially for a high risk pregnancy but I really would like to work again as I really miss working and the feeling of being a productive member of society. I miss working and I realize this might not be the best time to look for a job since I am pregnant but many people work when they are pregnant.

I do not have much more to update you on for the hump day update. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Update on First OBGYN Appointment

Good Afternoon, World!!! I just wanted to inform you of what the OBGYN said yesterday in my first appointment with her. Junior did attend the appointment with me as he is the father. My OBGYN is as sweet as can be as well as very direct. She informed me of the risk to myself and the fetus due to being in my mid forties and that many people deliver “healthy babies” at my age.

My OBGYN discussed a lot of the risk of having a baby at my age but also stated she deals with high risk pregnancies. She also deals with many folks with an extensive trauma history like mine and understands fully how traumatic it can be having someone look below the belt several times during the nine months of pregnancy and during delivery. She was honest with me stating there is a high possibility of me having a c-section due to all the scarring down below the belt from the severe trauma I experienced throughout my life.

We also discussed a great deal about my mental health challenges and how I am at “greater risk” for postpartum depression. We talked about staying on most of my psych meds and continuing to seek treatment from my mental health treatment team. I let the OBGYN that I had no plans of stopping treatment with my mental health team and that I was glad to hear we were on the same page regarding meds. The only meds the OBGYN wants me to not take until I see my psychiatric nurse practitioner which are the Ativan and the Ambien. Both of these meds are PRN’s for me as well as controlled substances which can put the baby at greater harm. I am pretty sure my psychiatric nurse practitioner will agree with the OBGYN and myself regarding not taking the Ativan and Ambien as she is pretty knowledgeable with this kind of stuff.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on a recovery workbook

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Go to Emerald House (a mental health club house)
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbooks

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • OBGYN appointment
  • Lunch with Junior and mutual friends
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbooks

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning walk
  • Emerald House virtual group
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbooks
  • 12 Step virtual meeting

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Emerald House virtual group
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbooks
  • Dinner with friends and Junior

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Go to Emerald House (a mental health club house)
  • Virtual appointment with therapist
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbooks
  • Movies and dinner with friends

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation through the calm app
  • Morning walk
  • University District Farmers Market with friends
  • Read
  • Color
  • Work on recovery workbook
  • Dinner with best friend

A Bundle Of Nerves With A Bun In The Oven

Good Evening, World!!! As of right now I am a mixture of emotions. I had my annual exam this morning and thankfully my partner was able to come with me as I struggle with the annual exam due to trauma. Junior, my partner, also came for another reason which was to medically confirm if I was pregnant as the two take home tests I took last week said I was. My doctor did medically confirm that I am pregnant and that I am about eight weeks pregnant. My doctor also made me an appointment with the OBGYN in the same clinic as my doctor is in, for next Tuesday. Of course Junior will be coming with me. Needless to say we are both scared shitless and ecstatic.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post with the exception that I will keep you all updated about the pregnancy. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Anxiety Over Tomorrow’s Doctor’s Appointment

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am nervous as hell for tomorrow morning as I have my yearly annual wellness exam with my doctor tomorrow. I am scared due to trauma related issues that my doctor is quite aware of. I am also scared and full of anxiety due to the fact that my doctor will confirm something medically which is why I am having my partner Junior come with me. It is something he would like medically confirmed as well.

Anyway, I am sadly having intrusive thought ping ponging in my head at the moment and it is not a good thing which is partly why I am currently writing this blog post. Blogging tends to help with the ping ponging of my thoughts as well as help with anxiety I deal with. I am just happy that I have various skills in my tool box to help with the anxiety.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you, the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Boring Post

Hello, World!!! It appears to be another typical autumn weather day in Seattle. It started out nice and reached 70 degrees (Fahrenheit). Now it is raining and yucky outside. Of course this is normal for Seattle for this time of year.

I went to the doctor’s again today. It was a follow up to a follow up apartment. I still have a stupid urinary tract infection (UTI). The doctor decided to have me extend me taking more antibiotics for the UTI. While at the doctor’s office I received the flu shot. Now my shoulder hurts which is a normal side effect for receiving the flu shot.

After getting back from the doctor’s office, I spent the rest of the day at home with my cat, Billie. I love being able to spend time with my cat. Not only did I spend time with my cat, I spent the afternoon and evening doing art. Specifically, I colored. As I colored, I also listened to music. I listened to my childhood memories play list as I colored.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it were not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!