Tag Archives: Mental Illness

So Far It’s Been A Productive Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! It is just after twelve noon, Seattle time and I feel like it has been a productive day so far. I am beyond grateful that I have done a great deal. In fact the day is barely half over and I still have a few more things to accomplish today.

I started off my day cleaning for about an hour which surprised the hell out of me as I normally clean about fifteen minutes at a time. I then worked on a workbook to finish up the first chapter which I am happy to announce that I did. I read a couple of chapters in a book followed by attending an online group. After the online group I worked on an art project I am doing for my therapist. The art project I am doing is that I am coloring a giant poster for my therapist as an appreciation gift for all of her help.

I do not have much else to write about in this particular blog post and have other things I would like to accomplish today. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write on my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Love Does Help One With Struggles

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am currently struggling at the moment with some pretty major PTSD symptoms and some slight depression symptoms. Due to the PTSD symptoms I called my boyfriend, Junior and he came over. (Yes, Junior and I are back together after much discussion.) Junior and I talked for a couple of hours and we both fell asleep. It is nice to love someone who you know that hurts you or harms you.

Now that we are both up, Junior is fixing the both of us breakfast. He is making French toast and scrambled eggs and bacon. I am looking forward to breakfast this morning and I am beyond grateful to have a fresh and homemade breakfast that is soon to be ready to eat.

Billie, my cat really likes Junior. Hell, if Junior and I lived together, I am sure that Junior would be Billie’s human. Of course Billie likes most people and Junior and I have no plans on moving in with each other anytime soon no matter how much we love each other.

Well, I best be going as I want to help Junior finish making breakfast and I also do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you the reader for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Structuring My Time

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I haven’t been unemployed for a full week yet and I am wanting and needing more structure in my daily schedule despite me doing my best to structure my days. At this point in time I do not regret quitting my job as it was not the best fit for me for reasons I rather not disclose at the moment. I know ultimately leaving my job was the best decision for me.

Yes, I may not have the structure of work that I may need but I am doing the best I can to structure my days. As part of my daily schedule doing mindfulness meditations and walking will continue. I will also be doing workbooks as a part of my recovery. I will also be setting out some time daily to read as well as some art work. Specifically, I will be coloring a giant poster for my therapist. Of course, I will be attending therapy every other week. Let’s not forget, I get to spend more time with my cat, Billie.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post.I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Blustery Winter Post From Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is that time of year where you never know what the weather is going to be here in Seattle. Well, I am partly wrong on that as most of the time it is usually dark, dreary, damp, wet and rainy. On that note, there are the occasional wind storms and sometimes snow. According to the weather report there are supposed to be strong winds today. In fact the view from my window proves this to be true as the trees are moving due to wind.

Despite the current windy and wet weather, various news reports are reporting that Seattle is supposed to have snow at the end of the week. Seattle shuts down when it snows. Part of the reason is many folks in Seattle don’t really know how to deal with which includes me especially since I spent the first sixteen years of my life in Southern California. The other reason is the lack of things such as snow plows and the fact that Seattle is the second hilliest city in the United States. (The hilliest city in the United States is San Francisco.) Snow is pretty to look at but I am not a huge fan of it due to the fact that I do not like the cold.

Even though there is a threat of snow at the end of this week, I at least know that if it does that I will have therapy on Friday as my session is virtual due to the fact my therapist works from home on Fridays. My therapist and I are working on skills to help with the Depression and PTSD symptoms I deal with especially how intense the symptoms are this time of year. Winter is a really challenging time of year for me in regards to increased Depression and PTSD symptoms which is why my therapist and I work on skills to help me through tough moments.

I do not have much else to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Managing Through a Tough Day

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It has been a rough day so far and it is not even twelve noon yet, here in Seattle. I think part of the reason why it has been a rough day is partly due to PTSD symptoms as well as depression symptoms. Both depression and PTSD symptoms suck but I think a factor of the depression symptoms is due to the current weather here in Seattle. It is currently cloudy with a great deal of rain. On that note at least it is not cold enough to snow as I am not a big fan of snow.

Since it hasn’t been the greatest weather outside, I have been doing some things to help myself through this tough day. I have been doing some mindfulness meditation practices as well as doing workbooks to focus on different aspects of my recovery. I have found that both the mindfulness meditation practices and doing workbooks have been quite helpful. Of course my cat, Billie, has been a major help.

Speaking of cats, I go back to volunteering at PAWS Cat City later today after taking some time off. I will be doing some sub shifts and hopefully, will be back on a regular shift soon. Volunteering with cats is awesome and I enjoy it immensely.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Workbooks
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Dinner with friends
  • Read

Monday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Go to Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Workbooks
  • Dinner with friends
  • Read

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Go to Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Workbooks
  • Read
  • Dinner with friends

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness Mediation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Virtual Group
  • Workbooks
  • Read
  • Online 12 Step Meeting

Thursday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Virtual Group
  • Workbooks
  • Read
  • Attend a college women’s basketball game at the University of Washington with friends

Friday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • Go to Emerald House (a mental health clubhouse)
  • Therapy (virtual session)
  • Workbooks
  • Read
  • Dinner with friends

Saturday

  • Mindfulness Meditation practice through the Calm App
  • Morning Walk
  • University District Farmers Market
  • Lunch with friends
  • Workbooks
  • Read
  • Clean apartment

Nightmares Suck Sh!t

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World. It is just after three o’clock in the morning, Seattle time and sadly, I am unable to sleep. I woke up to a nightmare. Nightmares suck sh!t and I wish I didn’t have to deal with them but sadly they are a major symptom of PTSD for me.

Since the nightmare was almost as horrific as the trauma I experienced as a child, I am pretty sure what I am going to do to get myself relaxed enough to hopefully get back to sleep. I think I will try to read first. I think I will start reading the book Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith. I have started this book a couple of times before but sadly never finished for various reasons.

If reading does not then, I will put on some music and do some artwork as I listen to the music. I am not sure what type of music I will listen to but I do know the type of artwork I will be doing. The type of artwork I will be doing is coloring. I enjoy coloring a great deal.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom for my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A New Years Update

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Happy New Year!!! It has been awhile since I last blogged. Some pretty major things have happened since I last blogged. Well, technically just one major thing has happened and surprisingly I am more relieved than I thought I would be. So, this past Thursday (January 4, 2024) was my last day at work. I would be lying if I said if I didn’t miss aspects of my job because I do. I miss the majority of my colleagues and all of my clients but I am so happy that I am no longer walking on eggshells around the direct supervisors on the team I worked on.

On that note, I had therapy yesterday and my therapist is just as thrilled as I am about my previous job. We not only discussed the job situation but my New Year’s goals for 2024 as well as my hopes for the year. We both agree that both hopes and goals will change or need some adjusting as the year goes on and will work on them throughout the year. We also discussed how challenging last year was despite a good start to last year.

Since it is the start of the New Year, I am hoping to restart blogging on a regular basis. This includes the Weekly Plans on Sunday mornings, Hump Day Updates on Wednesday evenings, Caturday with Billie (the Kat) featuring pictures of my cat on Saturday mornings and Weekly Check-In on Saturday evenings. Of course I will be doing other posts as well. I will be starting all this tomorrow (Sunday) with Weekly Plans.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated that you read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Life Update

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It has been quite a while since I updated you on my life which hasn’t been going to well which is mainly due to my job. I am on thin ice at work and I know I haven’t been meeting expectations of my job and take full responsibility for what I have not met those expectations. I also know that I have not been given the disability accommodations I much needed for work that have been known since my first day on the job with human resources full support up until returning from my first medical leave due to a traumatic event. I am such thin ice that I can be fired which is why I put in my resignation. I am resigning at a later date than I was planning on doing primarily due making sure I have money to pay my rent for the month of January as I am on another medical leave and want to make sure I have the money to pay rent and other bills. Yes, not resigning later than I had planned, I need to make sure I finish much needed things at work as well being able to say goodbye to clients and colleagues. My planned last day on my job will be my one year anniversary date of starting this job. I just hope I don’t get fired by my planned last day on the job.

Since I am resigning from my job I am hoping that Social Security will not stop my partial disability payments. I also hope I can get my full disability benefits back once I am no longer working. I am really worried about money. I am hoping I can get some form of employment so I don’t have worry about money.

Part of the reason I am so worried about money is credit card debt. But the main reason why I am worried is because my cat is still at the very beginning stages of kidney disease for the last couple of years and has vet visits every six months to keep any eye on his health. My cat Billie means the world to me and I love him so very much.

Now that it is the holiday season, I have a way to not be split between both sides of my family as I have to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas day which means I can wait till after my last day at my employer to have a celebration with my dads side one day and my moms side another day. Plus, I can also continue with my own Holiday traditions as well as start new ones. The ones I already have for myself is to do a winter type and/or a Christmas jigsaw puzzle, read both volumes of A Superheros Christmas, read a fiction Christmas book and color a Christmas picture poster or two. My two new holiday traditions this holiday season are to do Christmas logic problems which they do have books to do which sorta surprised me and a Christmas adult dot to dot. No, the dot to dot is NOT by any means X rated. The dot to dot is more advanced than the dot to dots we did as kids.

Well, I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!

An Early Morning Post Due to Waking up Too Early

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! At the start of writing this particular blog post it is 4:14 in the morning here in Seattle. I haven’t been getting much sleep due to the fact I most likely will be losing my job and having some insomnia over it. Some of the reasons I agree with while other reasons I don’t agree with due to the fact that I have not been able to use my reasonable accommodation request. I own up to the stuff that I haven’t need reasonable accommodation stuff but I just want to prove to my employer that I can do much better at my job if they allow me my reasonable accommodations.

Enough about work as I am trying to ge my mind off of work. by doing a number of things. First and foremost, I have been spending my time with my beloved cat, Billie. Having Billie by my side has been quite helpful. He is such an awesome and loving kitty. I am in awe of his unconditional love.

Besides my time with Billie, I have been doing my normal skill set to help myself through the challenging stuff the world throws at me such as artwork by coloring as well as reading. Let us not forrget about doing some mindfulness meditation practices. In fact I started to do log problems or logic puzzles. I find them quite fascinating Some are extremely challenging to .do but the satisfaction that comes with completing one is priceless. Plus I have a sense of pride when I am done with a logic problem or puzzle.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog post. It is greatly appreciated that you are the reader for reading my blog post. If it was not for you reading my blog post I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!!