Dreaming of Sleep

Good Morning, World!!! I am unable to sleep. I am not sure why. I can only guess it is my insomnia acting up once again. I wish I could sleep  but unfortunately I am unable to do so. One of the ways I have been attempting to get back to sleep is by doing some mindfulness and meditation practices. Usually this helps after the third time but sadly it hasn’t helped.

Since I am unable to sleep, I have been trying to keep myself busy. I have worked on my art. Specifically, I have been painting and collaging. I have been doing a combination of both genre’s I mentioned. I must say the particular piece I am working on is coming out quite splendidly.

Another thing I have been doing to keep myself busy is binge watching television. I watched an entire season of Friends as well as a half season of M*A*S*H. I had some great laughs watching both shows as comedies help me in many ways.

Just a reminder that I have advertisements on my blog to help me earn a little extra money. I hope that you my reader would be willing to click on an ad or two, once or twice a week so I can earn the extra money so I can buy people gifts for the holidays coming up. I would be greatly appreciated if clicked on the ads. I may not make much with the ads but every penny counts. I really want to give the people in my life some gifts that they will enjoy for the holidays.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate it very much. I hope everyone has a great Saturday and weekend and that you are able to enjoy some of the weekend. Again, thank you for reading. Hopefully, I will be able to get some sleep. Peace Out, World!!!

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Two O’clock in the Morning Bullshit

Good Morning, World!!! It is two o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world and all I have to say is a bunch of bullshit for being in the middle of the night. Bullshit that is nothing but a bunch of randomness. I, of course obviously can not sleep if I am blogging at this time of night. I did get a few hours of sleep in since I posted my last post which is a good thing.

Right now, with the way I things are going I have to make sure I use my Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) skills. My DBT skill have helped me a great deal over the last seventeen years. Yes, the DBT skills helped me in both the good a bad times. Right now my DBT skills are helping me with being somewhere in the middle of good and bad.

One of the things I am going to do is do some art work. I have been working a great deal on combining two genres of art and this painting and collaging. As awesome as it has been combining the two genres, I feel like now is not the time to work on neither painting or collaging and even both. So the art the I am going to focus on right now is coloring. Coloring is a mindfulness skill for me and it is quite meditative to me.

Speaking mindfulness and meditation I will also be doing some mindfulness and meditation practices. As they help me put me in a better place than I am in even if I am in a great place.

I, of course will be doing some binge watching some television tonight. Not sure what show I will be watching but it will be on one of the streaming sites a subscribe to. That will either be Netflix or Hulu but again not sure what type of television I will be watching. Hell, I might even watch a movie instead of television. I am pretty sure you don’t like the ads on my blog as I don’t either but I don’t get paid till I hit $100 and I am barely at $50. So once I get paid I will take of the advertisements off of my blog. So please click on the advertisements once or twice a week so I can get the $100 I need to get paid so I can get gifts for friends and family for the holiday season.

Again, I want to bring up some bullshit I keep bringing up in recent post and hope that you can do me the favor of clicking on the advertisements that appear on my blog. Every time someone clicks on an advertisement and lets it load all the way, I get anywhere from a few cent to a couple of dollars.

I want to thank you all for reading my post especially this one since it is a bullshit post. The main bullshit of this post is me asking you to click on the advertisements on my blog as each click does give me money but I don’t receive that money till it hits $100 which sucks but what can I do about it. Nothing. Thank you again for reading my blog as it is much appreciated. I hope you continue to read my and even click on an advertisement or two. Peace Out, World!!!

Still a Struggle on This Sunday Afternoon

Good Afternoon, once again, World!!! As I mentioned in my last post I was planning on going to both an art store and book store. I did manage to go to both of the stores and bought some things that would be helpful for me in both the good and bad times.

When I got home from the stores, I decided to do some coloring while listening music. It helped temporarily but not enough to make my self harm urges to go away. The urges appear to be getting stronger.

Since they are getting stronger, I decided I would do some mindfulness and meditation practices. They helped slightly but not enough. Doing the mindfulness and meditation practices made me realize that I need to go to the hospital to get evaluated. I most likely won’t end up on in inpatient unit but at least I will be safe for a few hours.

I did call the crisis worker again. You know the one I talked about in an earlier post. So, she said, that going to a hospital is a solid idea however she wants me spend about twenty minutes with my cat. In fact I spent about a half an hour with my cat before I decided to post this.

Now that I am done spending time with my cat and blogging, I’ll be going to the hospital. I will post when I am back from the hospital as I think it is not going to be more than five or six hours if not sooner.

Thank you so much for reading my blog. No need to worry about me. You know I am going to be safe as after I am done with this post, I will be on my way to the hospital. Thank you so much, again for reading my blog. I hope you all have a good rest of your Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

Needing Some Zzz’s In Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! It is 2:30 in the morning in my corner of the world and I am unable to sleep despite everything I have tried to get to sleep. Let’s begin what I know is keeping me up and the corrupts are anxiety and PTSD. Both really suck any time of day especially when you are trying to get to sleep.

Now lets get to how I have attempted to get to sleep so far. I started off with taking some Melatonin and then doing both a mindfulness and meditation practice after watching late night television. Late night television is quite helpful for me with my sleep as humor and comedy help a great deal as does doing mindfulness and meditation practices after late night television. I decided to take melatonin for the first time and took it an hour before I knew I was going to go to bed. Unfortunately, melatonin, late night television with humor and comedy as well as mindfulness and meditation practices didn’t help me get to sleep. So, that is when I took my anxiety medicine in hopes that it would help me get sleepy enough to get to sleep. Sadly this did not work either. So, I tried my new sleeping med and it appears that it is not working either. It is quite frustrating for me to not be able to sleep. My next step is take a benadryl and watch M*A*S*H in hopes that it can be helpful for some sleep.

Well, I hope everyone has a good night or morning or evening depending where they are in the world. I am saying goodnight in hopes to getting some sleep. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you read my blog. I am grateful for each one of you. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Street Fair
  • Get Emotional Support Animal (I’m getting a cat)
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Monday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Club House / Day Treatment
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Tuesday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Therapy
  • Vocational Appointment
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Wednesday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Thursday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Minfulness
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Friday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Club House / Day Treatment
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Saturday

  • Blog
  • Meditation / Mindfulness
  • Read
  • Workbooks

Midnight Ramblings

Hello, World!!! I have trouble comprehending why I have such a difficult time at night. Not just with sleep but with the symptoms of anxiety and depression. I am struggling a little bit with depression and anxiety relating to PTSD. Dealing with symptoms this time of night when your natural supports are unavailable for whatever reason can be difficult and challenging for me.

As challenging as it is for me right now, I know what I can do to help myself. I can turn to my coping skills. Coping skills that have helped me a great deal throughout my recovery. Coping skills that will continue to help me even in this moment in time.

One of the things I will do is color. As any type of art has helped me a great deal. In fact I’ll probably end doing some collaging as well because it helps me put words to my emotions.

Another thing I will be doing is a mindfulness and meditation practice as this helps quiet my mind. It puts me in a better head space. A head space that is at least in neutral gear.

Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Mr. Sandman Skipped Me, Again

Hello, World!!! I am having trouble sleeping once again. I’m getting frustrated with not being able to sleep. Sleeping is vital to one’s recovery or at least mine which is why I am wanting to be able to get a decent nights sleep.

Since I am unable to sleep I have been working on one of my workbooks. Actually, I think I’ll work on the mindfulness workbook as it might help me get into a wiser mind. Mindfulness has been helping me with a great deal of things like sleep.

After doing a workbook I think I’ll read a few pages in my book. I am really wanting to finish is soon. I have only been reading ten to twenty pages at a time due to lack of concentration from depression.

Depression sucks just as much as insomnia but that is why I am doing some things this next week to help with them. Things that I didn’t put in my Weekly Plans post as I realized that I could do the activities after I posted it. The activities that will help with the depression are peer run groups at a peer run community center.

Thank you for reading. Have a good work week everyone. Peace Out, World!!!