Monthly Archives: May 2020

A Before I Leave for Work Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am up for the day and mostly ready for work. Overall, I slept pretty well. Even though I woke up earlier than I would have liked at least I know I woke up naturally and not by rude and noisy neighbors. In fact this was the first Saturday that I was not woken up by the same two loud and noisy neighbors on the patio in about a month. Just grateful to not be woken up so rudely.

As I type this blog post, my cat, Billie Dean is laying in my lap. I love the fact that he is in my lap at moment because my anxiety is high at the moment. Also, another reason I love the fact he is in my lap is that I won’t be able have cuddle time with him tonight due to the fact I’ll be at work for more that twelve hours.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I just want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a great rest of your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s 5:00 In the Morning & Time for Bed

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is five in the morning in my corner of the world and time for me to go to bed to sleep the day away. I sleep the day away on Saturdays because I work twelve plus hours on Saturday nights. I am looking forward to going to bed and curly up with my cat Billie Dean at my side.

Speaking of my cat Billie Dean, he hasn’t really left my side tonight. He was curled up on my lap all night long. He was curled up on my lap no matter if I was reading or watching movies. Billie has a calming affect on me which helps a great deal with my anxiety.

Another thing that helps with my anxiety is reading. Just like I said in my last post, I read. I read for about an hour. Of course Billie was curled up on my lap sleeping. I read Dragonsong by Anne McCaffey. I am really enjoying the book a great deal. I hope after I am done reading it, that I will do a book review on it. I love to read a great deal.

After reading for about an hour, I watched movies. Movies help me to escape reality for a few hours. Sometimes escaping reality is a good thing as it helps deal with stress. I watched The Princess Bride and Free Willy. I really enjoy both movies as they remind me of positive childhood memories. Good childhood memories are a rare thing for me so I hold on to them like they are gold.

I am needing to end this particular blog post because it is time for me to go to bed and get some sleep. I want to thank all of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you all read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has an awesome Saturday as well as a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Two in the Morning Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is nine minutes after two in the morning in my corner of the world. After working on some are for almost an hour and a half, I decided to make me some food. I made me some spaghetti with homemade spaghetti sauce I made awhile back and froze. I froze the sauce because I live alone and always make too much. Anyway reheated the homemade sauce to put on my noodles. To go with my spaghetti, I made garlic bread. I love garlic.

After I am done writing this blog, I am going read the book I am reading. It is a science fiction book called Dragonsong by Anne McCaffrey. So far I am really enjoying the book. I am going to be starting chapter five and look forward to what is to come in the book. In fact this book is the first in a series. Actually it is the first in a trilogy. I love book series for a number of reasons. One of which is I tend to get immersed in the story and with the characters so much that I hate to say goodbye. I know that sound silly but it is true.

I, of course will be reading and Billie Dean, my cat most likely will be curled up on my lap. I really enjoy the fact that Billie is a lap cat. Billie is such a cuddle bug and I appreciate it. With Billie, my cat, being such a cuddle bug, it has gotten me to slow down and be in the current moment.

I am hoping to stay awake till at least five in morning. I really do wish I could go to sleep now but I cannot. I cannot because I work a twelve and a half hour night shift on Saturday nights. That means I need to sleep during the day on Saturdays. I wish my shifts weren’t at night because it messes with my sleep schedule and I already have difficulties with my sleep as it is. Even though I don’t like night shifts due to the sleep thing, I am grateful that I have a job that I enjoy for the most part.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has an awesome Saturday as well as a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Midnight Post

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is midnight in my corner of the world. I am staying up all night due to the fact I have to sleep all day. I need to sleep all day on Saturday’s because I work a twelve and a half hour night shift. I really enjoy my current job with the exception of it being a night shift. I am not a big fan of it being twelve and a half hours but I think if it was a day time shift I would be more accepting of a twelve and a half hour shift. My colleagues are great and it feels like a family type environment. The clients I work with are awesome. My supervisor is super supportive. I think the reason I have stayed at my current job for so long is because of my colleagues and supervisor as well as it being a supportive environment. The main reason I am looking for a new job is I don’t do well with a night shift.

Speaking of looking for a new job, I mentioned in an earlier post, I have a job interview at a local mental health agency. I hope I get the job because I love working in supportive housing. I also love being employed as a peer support specialist also known as a peer counselor. I am trying to not get my hopes up high about getting the job because if I don’t get it, I don’t really want to be let down. No matter what if I don’t get it the job, I will be let down but if I keep my expectations low then the let down won’t be so hard. I am looking forward to the interview because I will consider it practice especially if I don’t get the job.

Anyway on to something completely different. One of the ways I will keep myself from falling asleep is doing some art. I will be doing different mediums (genres) of art. I will be doing some coloring, painting and some collage. I most likely be combining the collage with some painting. I love my completed art work when it combines painting and collage. It is very interesting. I also enjoy giving my art away. People wonder why I don’t sell it. I don’t sell it because I don’t think its worth very much. I also love being able to give people hand made gifts.

The best part of Friday nights is that I get to spend the entire night awake with my cat, Billie Dean. I really think he appreciates when I don’t sleep at night because that way I spend the night playing with him and being awake with him. I love my cat so much. I really enjoy the fact that he is a cuddle bug. I think if it were up to him, he would spend all of his time in my lap.

I do not have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Saturday. I also hope everyone has an awesome weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

Feeling So Much Better

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am feeling better that I was than my last two post. I spent time with family. Actually, I spent time with my grandpa and uncle as I did laundry at their place. It is always great to spend time with my family. I love my grandpa so much.

After spending time at my grandpa’s, I came home and spent time with my cat, Billie Dean. While spending time with Billie in my lap I read. I am reading a science fiction book. So far so good. I am only on the third chapter but I like thus far.

As I was reading one of my neighbors who has become a good friend asked me if I wanted to go to their place to play some card games. So, I went to her place and we played cards for a couple of hours. I had a great time. I really enjoy spending time with friends.

I do no have much more to talk about in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have an awesome weekend ahead of you. Peace Out, World.

Still Gloomy but Hopeful

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! My depression is still acting up a little bit. Wish it wasn’t but it is something that I have dealt with for as long as I can remember. The gloomy weather isn’t helping much but it also makes me feel slightly better knowing the weather fits my mood.

Even though my mood is still low, I am hopeful. Even in my last post I was hopeful but now I am even more hopeful. I am at my grandpa’s spending time with him and doing my laundry. I am grateful for my family especially my grandpa. Not very many 40+ year olds still have a grandparent left which is why I am extremely grateful to have my grandpa in my life.

Another reason why I am feeling hopeful is that I have a job interview next week at a local mental health agency for a peer specialist position. The peer position is for supportive housing and thankfully I have experience working in supportive housing as well as a peer. I am hopeful that I could be on the short list but I wouldn’t be surprised if I don’t get the job. The reason being is that the job is at the mental health agency I am a client of.  Yes, it is okay to be employed as a peer at the agency where you are a client at just as long as you don’t work for the program you are a client of. In fact my employment specialist made sure it was okay before I applied. Again, I am hopeful that I will be on the short list but realistically know that they most likely won’t hire a client and I am okay with that. At least I will have the experience of an interview.

Anyway after I am done writing this post, I am going to start reading a book. Not sure which one as I brought two to choose from. Both of which are science fiction books. I really enjoy science fiction and fantasy genres. I really enjoy reading. I will let you know what book I am reading and hope to let you know what I think of it after I am finished with the book.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. In fact I hope everyone has a great weekend ahead. Peace Out, World!!!

A Little Gloomy

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am feeling really lonely and my depression symptoms are starting to increase. I am positive that my increased loneliness and depressive symptoms have to deal with the stay at home order. Not being able to do the things I normally do is starting to get to me. I know I will be able to do things again, sooner or later but I just want the human connection.

In fact I will be getting some human connection in a couple of hours. I will be going to a family members house to hang out. In fact I will be going to my grandpa’s place. I will be doing laundry when I am there but am grateful to be able to spend time with him. I am hoping it will be helpful for both my grandpa and myself.

As I am writing this post, my cat, Billie Dean, is wanting some cuddle time. Much needed cuddle time for the both of us. I love the fact he is such a cuddle bug. Having Billie during the pandemic has been quite helpful for me. Having a pet around is great no matter when but right now during Covid-19, I am that much more grateful to have a pet. I love my cat so much.

I’m looking out my window and realize the weather here in Seattle is gloomy once again. I don’t mind the gloomy weather especially right now as it seems to be fitting of my current mood. Seattle is a great place to live even in the gloomy weather.

I do not have much more to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Friday. Peace out, World!!!

Just Another Random Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am sad right now and dealing with some grief which explains why I am feeling a bit on the gloomy side. Today marks the two year anniversary of me adopting my last cat, Lil Brooke. I miss her dearly and wish she didn’t cross over the rainbow bridge on Thanksgiving Day of last year (2019) as she was only with me for a year and a half. I would have loved to have more time with Lil Brooke but I am extremely grateful for the time I did have with her. I am also grateful that she had a furrever home for the last year and half of her life. She will always have very special place in my heart.

As sad as I am with missing Lil Brooke I am grateful for today. I had a therapy session with my therapist on the phone earlier. My therapy session went well. We discussed a number of things that needed to be discussed. I am grateful to be able to still have a session with my therapist even if it is on the phone for now.

Anyway, I am going to go to a friends place to watch movies and eat food. This friend is a neighbor so I will just be taking an elevator ride to their place. It is perfect weather for movies especially with good friends and food. Looking forward to spending time with other people.

I do not have much more to talk about. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of their Wednesday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Gloomy Weather + Art + A Cat + Therapy = A Day of Self Care

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I finally got some sleep. Not much sleep but some. I am grateful for the little sleep I did get. Sleep is key for me to help maintain the mental health symptoms of the diagnosis’s I have.

In all honesty my mood fits today’s weather here in Seattle. It is gray and gloomy which is how I feel at the moment. My gloomy mood most likely has something to do with the lack of sleep however it is something to be aware of as a just in case. A just in case depression symptoms start increasing. On that note, I am sort of glad the weather fits my gloomy mood because it means I can just lay back and do some art.

The type of art I plan on doing is coloring, collage and painting. In fact I am planning on finishing up one art piece that combines collage and painting. In fact I am extremely proud of this particular piece and hope to share it with you. I also plan on doing some coloring. Coloring soothes me as well as soothes the inner child in me.

Speaking of art, I will be watching the television show, The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. It is another thing that soothes me and my inner child. The Joy of Painting helps me be at peace. There is something about Bob Ross and his painting that puts me in a state of calm.

Another thing I will be doing since I will be spending the day at home on this gloomy day is spending time with my cat, Billie Dean. I love Billie so much. I love the fact that he is a cuddle bug and very much a lap cat. I am happy to have him love on me today.

I am looking at the time and realize my therapy session  will be starting in the next twenty minutes. My therapist will be calling me at 12:30pm to have our session. Our session are currently on the  phone due to Covid-19. I would much rather have an in person therapy session but I totally understand why it is not at the moment.

I do not have much more to say. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have an awesome day. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Phuck It!!! I Can’t Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, I still haven’t slept and am getting extremely frustrated about. Especially since I have things that need to get done and be attended to. Not being able to sleep is quite annoying as well as frustrating and wish my meds would work. I guess this is the time to use the DBT Skill; Radical Acceptance. Radical Acceptance isn’t one of the easiest DBT skills for me to use especially in regards to not sleeping but it is one of the most useful skills for me to use.

Besides using radical acceptance, I have been doing some art. I have been coloring, collaging and painting. I have also been doing a combination of mediums (genre’s) which has been quite fun and interesting. In fact I am happy to see some great finished pieces that I hope to give to people at some point. I enjoy making things and giving the finish product to people for the hell of it.

Billie Dean, my cat, has been keeping me company as I do art work. I am grateful to have Billie in my life and happy that he came into my life when he did. I really miss my last cat, Lil Gertie and think she was the one that led Billie and myself to each other. I know it seems weird but I think it’s the case. I sure love Billie and that he is a such a lap cat.

I don’t have much more to say. I do however want to thank every single one of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope each one of you enjoys the Wednesday ahead of you and that you are able to find joy in this day. Peace Out, World!!!