Tag Archives: Mental Illness

Coming to Terms with the Reality but there is a Glimmer of Hope

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I’ve been absent from blogging due to finding out that the agency I work at will be be closing down according to the board of directors. On the hopeful side King County wants to keep my employer open. Open because we have been the longest opened Queer mental health agency in North America if not the world. It’s been open for 53 years. It’s been around longer than I have been a live. I know the reality is that it most likely will close but at least there is some hope from King County,

I trying work with some amazing colleagues who I have grown to love a family. I just hope they feel the same about me. My colleagues have become both friends and chosen family. I just hope a miracle from the universe or a hail Mary happens before the final decision is made. If it were up to the board of directors the agency would have been shout down by now.

Any way peoples cats and other pets have been keeping us entertaining during meetings as well as sessions with clients. I will miss seeing all the pet and animals my clients and colleagues have. Shutting down Seattle Counseling Services is not a good thing especially for the Queer community.

I don’t have much to say but I have a very slightly hope that my employer can stay open. I don’t have anything else to say except thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you reading my blog, I wouldn’t be writing my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading m blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check In

Posted on by Gertie

It is another Saturday night in Seattle. Of course I am spending it alone with my cat, Billie Dean. In fact Billie has been helping me with the depression and the anxiety. My friends and family have been helping as well, like my cat Billie as well as my colleagues. It feels great to feel loved by my pet cat as well as my friends, family and colleagues.

The best part of this week is that I will be there to the last day which is May 6th. I might even be there to September but that is not one hundred percent yet. At least there is somewhat of a date. I really love this job and feel like I have a niche at this job.

It is a sad day in a America when the longest queer mental health agency is closing down. My employer serves more than two thousand clients and it breaks my heart that the clients have to go to other agencies that has caused trauma to them.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you the reader, read my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Cat Sleeping in Human’s Lap While Human is Having a Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Posted on by Gertie

Good Very Early, Morning, World!!! It is 5:34 in the morning Seattle time and have not gotten much sleep. I think part of the reason I am sleepless in Seattle is because I am worried about the clients my employer serves. Sadly, the board of directors made the decision to close the doors of the longest running Queer mental health agency in the United States. Someone told me the world but I am not sure about that the world but I do know it’s the longest Queer mental agency in the United States.

I may not have liked finding out six days before my birthday that I will be getting a lay off without an unknown date especially since the following week; I am on my vacation. As depressing and anxiety provoking all this is, I am having an okay vacation. I was able to spend a couple of days in Bremerton an am now back home in Seattle.

It was nice getting out of town for a few days which helped a little bit with the depression and the anxiety. Now if I can get some sleep as the depression and anxiety regarding the lay offs for my job isn’t helping any of the sleep.

On the plus side of all this my cat hasn’t left my side since my grandpa watched Billie for me at my grandpa’s place. I think we are both glad to be home. I love my cat Billie Dean so very much and I know Billie loves me very much.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank for reading by blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Good night and Good early morning world!!! Peace Our, World!!!

A Late Birthday Post While on Vacation & Getting Laid Off +Supportive People in My Life

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Early Friday, Morning!!! This past Monday (March 7th), I turned 43 years old and was and still am on vacation. Sadly, I found out on Tuesday, March 1, 2022 that my employer is closing its doors. The doors to the longest running queer mental health agency in the United States. Some say the world but I’m not sure about the world thing.

On that a note I did go on my vacation to Bremerton, Washington. I am glad I went because it helped me clear my head. I was able to to see friends over in Bremerton which is always good thing. While I was in Bremerton my grandpa took take of my cat at his place in Lynnwood.

I appreciate all the people who have been supporting me. I feel loved and supported by my by friend, family, colleagues, and of course my cat Billie Dean. I love my cat, Billie so much.

Despite the news of being laid off with an unknown date, I am one lucky person. I live in a country where I don’t have to flee from due to war.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. If it wasn’t for you the blogger reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Wish me luck on finding a new job once I get laid off from my current employer. Peace Out, World!!!

A gRaTiTuDe & CoMpLaInInG pOsT

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!!! It has been a week and two days since I last blogged. I found out that my employer will be no longer a mental health agency much longer. The board let us know on Tuesday, March 1, 2022. It came to a surprise to everyone including to the CEO. Needless to say we are all going through grief especially for our clients. I am still in shock one week and two days later. On top of that I found out six days before my birthday and my vacation.

On to the gratitude part of this post is at least I’ve had the support of my friends, family and colleague who have become family. I think all this has brought my colleagues closer together. As far as the clients go most of them are taking better than I thought they would. I am grateful for my colleagues and clients. They are the reason I do what I do and be a peer support specialist. I will miss working with my clients and colleagues. Oh, the supervisors are amazing.

I do not not have much more to say in this blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end. Peace Out, World!!!

Still Struggling but Doing Better

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World. It is almost ten o’clock on a Sunday night here in rainy Seattle. I feel like the rain fits my current mood of being depressed. On that note, it feel like the depression is lifting a little bit which is a really good thing.

Sadly, I did not go to my volunteer job at PAWS Cat City this morning because I did not get much sleep last night. It felt like I didn’t getting any sleep but I’m sure I got some sleep; sort of like cat naps or I would have most likely slept all day today if I got absolutely no sleep last night.

I’ve been lucky today as I had some of my support system help me out today. My uncle and grandpa came over with some breakfast. After we ate breakfast, my uncle and grandpa helped me a little bit with cleaning my apartment. It’s still a disaster area but at least you can tell there is some improvement.

After my family helped me with my apartment, I decided to turn on my music and play it very loudly. So, loud I will be surprised if one of my neighbor don’t complain to the apartment management. On that note, while having my music on full blast, decided to do some art work. The type of art work I did was coloring. I love to color and was able to finish the piece I was coloring to give to a friend who is a neighbor and live in my apartment building.

So, I went up to my friends apartment who is a neighbor and gave him my finished coloring piece I colored for him. In fact his music was on blast as well. He was also doing some art work except he was painting. In fact he allowed me to add to his painting which I found cool that he let me help him with this painting.

When I came back from my friends apartment, I decided to binge watch a couple of television shows on Netflix and Hulu. Of course, Billie Dean, my cat sat on my lap as I binged watched television shows. I love my cat so very much. He is a very sweet and loving kitty. He is also very much a lap kitty which is great especially when my depression is acting up.

As far as the Everyday Inspiration course I am taking through WordPress, I plan on continuing the course where I last left off. I really enjoy taking this course. It helps me stay focused on blogging. It also helps me keep you the reader more interested in my blog or at least that is my hope in what it does.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you, the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Wishing the Depression Would Disappear

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is late Friday evening, In fact it is almost on eleven at night on Friday. I went to work today and that went fine and dandy despite the depression and anxiety would go away. I love my job and am grateful for it. I just wish Depression and Anxiety wouldn’t get in the way of my job but at least I am still able to work and do an okay job at it. Of course when I got home from work Billie Dean greeted me at the door which helped with the depression and anxiety

When I got home I spent time doing some art while listening to music. Specifically the type of art work I was doing was coloring. I was doing some coloring of some morbid coloring books while listening to YungBlud and Nirvana. I love doing art while listening to music. As I was coloring and listening to music, Billie of course was trying to “help” me do my art work by coloring.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope to start back to Everyday Inspiration course tomorrow (Saturday). I really want to finish the course. Again, thank from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World.

Depression & Anxiety Suck Sh*t

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is another Sunday afternoon here in Seattle. Thankfully, it is a Sunday of a three day weekend because tomorrow (Monday) is Presidents Day here in the United States. Not sure why we have a Presidents Day but I’m grateful that I don’t have to work and get paid for doing nothing. I would rather be working tomorrow but I have the day off.

Part of the reason why I want to work because both my depression and anxiety are acting up at the moment. I wish they were not acting up especially at the same time which sucks sh*t.

In fact volunteering at PAWS Cat City this morning helped both the depression and anxiety. I love volunteering and being able to help cats find their furrever home. Today, we only had three cats. One was on hold, one isn’t ready for adoption and the other is adoptable and not on hold. Lets hope the two adoptable cats get adopted today.

On that note, Billie Dean, my cat has been quite helpful for both the anxiety and depression. He love getting attention no matter if my symptoms are acting up or not but he seeks it out more when my mental health symptoms are acting up. I am grateful that he knows when I need the attention from him when he ask for more attention than he usually wants which he loves.

I do not have anything else to discuss in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate you the reader, reading my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Can’t Sleep & Slightly Depressed

Posted on by Gertie

Good Early Morning, World!!! It is a few minutes after two o’clock in the morning here is in Seattle. I am unable to sleep and I am slightly depressed most likely due to the lack of sleep tonight and last night. The lack of helps play into the increase of depression symptoms which sucks shit.

Billie Dean, my cat has been helping my depression a great deal. He has been by my side all day and night with couple of exceptions when he was eating, drinking water or using the litterbox. Having Billie not leave my side has been quite helpful to my depression

Another thing that has been helpful is doing some art work. In fact the type of art work I have been doing is coloring. As I have been coloring, I have going back and forth listening to a podcast on philosophy and music. Coloring while listening to a philosophy podcast or music has helped my depression decrease just like having my cat Billie by my side.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Three Weeks in a Row of Blogging Everyday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!!! According to WordPress, I have a twenty-one streak of blogging. That means, I’ve been writing everyday for the last three weeks. I say that has been pretty consistent like I have been aiming for.

Blogging more consistently has been has been quite helpful maintaining my self-care. Self care helps me keeps me on track with my mental health recovery. Of course, my cat Billie Dean, like to help me do the occasional blog post. Mainly because Billie wants the attention.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, again, thank you again from the bottom of my hear for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!