Tag Archives: Recovery

Let’s Go Seahawks

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I realize I posted not to long ago but I just wanted to let you know that I have gotten most of my packing done which is a good thing. I also cleaned my bathroom which always makes me feel much better for some odd reason.

Now I am sitting down with a cup of hot chocolate watching the Seattle Seahawks play against the Kansas City Chiefs here in Seattle. I, of course am rooting for the Seahawks. There is nothing like being in my pajama’s drinking hot chocolate watching some football.

Yes, I know it is barely the first quarter of the game and I just recently posted my last post but blogging is good self care for me as is watching some football. Of course it helps being at home comfortable in pajama’s with hot chocolate and a cuddling cat. I am grateful that most of my packing is done and that my bathroom is clean.

I am going to go and watch the Seahawk game. As of right now the score is Kansas City Chiefs: 0 and Seattle Seahawks: 7 and is barely the first quarter. Let’s go Seahawks!!! I hope everyone has a good holiday and enjoys the rest of their Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

A Woe Is Me Moment

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I am not doing so well. I am dealing with a ton a grief and increased symptoms of depression. I realize that as Christmas gets closer that the grief will increase due to my grandmas death and I know that the symptoms of the PTSD will increase due to childhood trauma that happened around this time of year. So, the next few days will be quite difficult for me and I hope that when I am staying at my moms that I will have access to WiFi so I can keep you up to date on how things are going.

At this moment in time I am trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my day. I know I have to pack to get ready to be gone for a few days. Don’t worry Lil Gertie will be staying at my grandpa’s when I am at my mom’s. At least the one thing I don’t have to figure out for the rest of the day is buying gifts and wrapping them as I am already done with doing that chore.

In all honesty I am not sure what to do with the rest of my evening. I know I have to pack and really don’t want to do that. Some of the things I have to pack are going to be last minute stuff like Lil Gertie’s food and water dishes as well as her food. Packing shouldn’t really be a problem as I will be spending most of tomorrow at my grandpas and then tomorrow evening I will be going to my moms and coming home the day after Christmas. I guess, I’ll pack what I can and then watch movies.

When I pack I have to make sure I have all my coping skills I can bring with me as my mom can get on my last nerve especially since this year I am not staying a hotel but at her place. I am taking plenty of books, comic books as well as coloring stuff. I am also taking my computer with plenty of movies and hopefully I can get on someone’s WiFi as my mom does not have WiFi.My mom doesn’t have cable either so at least if I can’t get any WiFi from someone else I will still have my laptop for movies that I will bring.

Thank you for reading my blog. I don’t have much else to say. I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday. Peace Out, World!!!!

Fighting Off Depression With Humor

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I have been up for several hours now and could really use a nap. The problem with taking a nap is if I do take one, I won’t be able to get up in time to go to my volunteer job and will not be able to sleep tonight. The sad thing is I woke up in a very depressive state. A depressive state that is quite concerning for me however if I am able to get through the next few days it is my hope that the depression symptoms with start to subside. I am pretty sure that the grief I am dealing with in regards to the loss of my grandma on Valentines Day of this year (2018) could have a lot to do with the increased symptoms of my depression.

Since I have been fighting off depression and grief I decided to watch the Netflix special that Ellen DeGeneres did and is so happened the show they made into a special was here in Seattle. I wish I was able to attend it in person however I was unable to do so. I am just thrilled that I was able to watch it earlier today on Netflix to help with my mood. Ellen is quite funny and I personally think she is relatable to people or at least she is to me. After watching Ellen’s Netflix special, it was quite helpful in lifting my spirits and not making the decision to call out “sick” for my volunteer job this evening.

Not only did watching the Ellen special on Netflix help me make a good choice to go to my volunteer job tonight but helped to blog about how I am feeling about shit. Shit like the depression and grief I am dealing with at the moment. Blogging seems to help and hope that sharing my story help you my reader some how. Blogging is a great outlet for me just like watching comedy is.

I don’t have much else to say at the moment. So, I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Another Brief Check In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I had a nice time at a Yule celebration with some friends. We started out our celebration by going to Red Robin to eat. We then went to a friends house where we exchanged gifts and played some games. I love Yule celebrations because it is a celebration where I am not judged like I am at Christmas celebrations.

Before attending the Yule celebration with friends my therapist called me to check in with me to make sure I have a good self care plan in place for the next four days. He will be out of the office on Christmas Eve and well the office is closed on Christmas. I informed him of what my self care plan was he thought it was a “great plan.” I am beyond grateful that I have a therapist that cares about me and check up on me when needed.

As many of you know today is the first day of winter in the Northern Hemisphere which means it is the shortest day of the year. As much as I dislike the shorter days at least I know starting tomorrow (Saturday the 22nd) the days will slowly start getting longer.

I don’t have much to say. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated especially this time of year. I hope to blog some time tomorrow. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Have a great evening everyone. Happy Solstice and Yule. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Check In Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! As many of you know is that today is the first day of winter in the Northern Hemisphere. This means it is the shortest day of the year which is never a good thing for me when it comes to the symptoms of my mental health challenges especially the depression. Despite it being a not so good day for the symptoms of my mental health challenges, I have created ways to make it a good day.

First and fore most, I am looking forward to spending the first day of Yule with my friends this evening. I love spending time with friends anytime of the year especially when it comes to celebrating them or their beliefs. I do have to mention that I am having anxiety over this get together and I am unsure why. I have done this get together with these friends for several years now. Granted, I may have anxiety over this get together for some unknown reason but I am really looking forward to spending the first day of Yule with my friends.

It appears that life is throwing me a wrench at the moment with increased anxiety, depression and PTSD symptoms. Symptoms that come when it is the most inconvenient of times but then again there is no convenient time for symptoms to surface. I did email my therapist about the increase of symptoms and that I am not in need of a check in at the moment. I emailed him just to make him aware of what was going on so if I need a check in, he is not surprised.

Before I end this post, I want to remind you my reader about the ads on my blog. I have ads on my blog to earn extra money. The only way I make the money is if you my reader click on to the ads. I am hoping that you my reader can click on the ads so I can earn a few extra cents to dollars. I am hoping that enough people click on the ads so I can get paid the money. The only way they pay out the money is if you reach one hundred dollars and if you don’t reach out one hundred dollars the money just sits there until you collect enough money that reaches one hundred dollars. I hope that you all can do me this favor. I need about twenty dollars to reach one hundred dollars to collect it. So I beg you to click on the ads so I can reach the one hundred dollars.

Thank you for reading my blog and I apologize for begging you to click on the ads. Once I reach one hundred dollars is the moments I turn off the ads on my blog. Again thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great Friday and awesome Winter Solstice. Blessed Yule to everyone who celebrates Yule. I hope everyone also has an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Blessed Solstice

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I still have not slept and am a little annoyed with the fact that I did not sleep a wink last night. Despite not being able to sleep I am really grateful for what I have. I am grateful for the celebration I will be doing this evening with friends.

I celebrate Yule or Winter Solstice with my Pagan friends. Yule last from December 21st to January 1st and we usually get together on the first of Yule which is December 21st to celebrate with each other. That way we can celebrate Yule and other holidays that may be at the same time Yule with family. Other such holidays include Christmas, Kwanza and sometimes Hanukkah. My friends and I celebrate Yule by eating dinner together as well exchange gifts. It is a great time had by all. I am glad that I do this every year with my Pagan friends even though I am not Pagan. I attempt to celebrate everyone’s holiday and be as diverse as possible. I even celebrate Kwanza with my friends who are people of color even though I am a not a person of color. My friends of color who celebrate Kwanza always ask me to attend their celebrations and I accept a good portion of time. I guess what I am saying is that I celebrate everyone this time of year and all year long.

As I end this post I hope to post later on today. I hope everyone has a great Yule as well as great Friday. Blessed Solstice everyone. Peace Out, World!!!

No Sleep For Me

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am unable to sleep right now. No matter how much I try, I am unable to sleep. I have taken my sleep meds as well as some Melatonin and neither are working. I am starting to get quite frustrated with not being able to sleep.

Thankfully, I have electricity because it keeps going out due to the windy weather and power lines keep going down. I am grateful for electricity at the moment because I have been watching movies which has been quite helpful to me.

Unfortunately, yet fortunately the electricity would go out due to the windy weather and I then get a battery operated lantern and read. I am reading a book that I keep putting down and picking back but have to reread from the beginning due to forgetting where I left off. I am reading a science fiction / fantasy novel. I love reading

So between reading and movies I have been keeping myself busy. Lil Gertie, appears to be happy that I am awake right now as she is getting a lot attention as she is a night owl. I love my cat so much. She makes my life so much better.

I want to write more but my lights are starting to flicker again so I want to make sure this post gets posted just in case the electricity goes out again. The weather in Seattle the last few days has been yucky to even those who have spent their entire lives in the Seattle area. I just wish it wasn’t so windy.

Again, I really should get going. I hope everyone has a good Friday as it is officially Friday everywhere in America. Before I go, I would like to wish everyone a Blessed Solstice. Have a wonderful weekend everyone. Peace Out, World!!!

 

 

Nothing But Random Sh*t, Once Again

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Overall, today has been a good day despite some challenging moments. Today, I went to the mental health agency I am a client of as their day treatment was having a holiday lunch. I helped serve lunch which always makes me feel great help other out. Anyway some of the clinicians from the agency even ate with including my own therapist. He said he wouldn’t have come if I didn’t invite him even though the day treatment staff invited all the staff to join. Him saying this made me feel good about myself and that he cares about his clients as will do what he is able to do to help with his clients recovery.

It was nice to see some old faces in day treatment today. Seeing old friends is always a good thing. It was great to catch up with others especially people I haven’t seen a year or two if not longer. The one thing I did not like about today was the bullying that was going on. I am unable to comprehend why people bully others. I did stick up for those who were being bullied and the bully told on me and thankfully other stuck up for me and the bully was asked to leave for the day.

The weather in Seattle today was shitty. There was high winds today on top of the yucky rain. In fact I didn’t have power when I got home from the day treatment holiday lunch. I finally got it back on about an hour ago and my apartment is freezing as I have electric heating so the heaters are on full blast at the moment. I just hope the wind dies down soon. I don’t like yucky weather like today.

I don’t have much else to say. I will post tomorrow or at least that is my plan. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Have a wonderful rest of your Thursday evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Wednesday Evening Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today, overall has been a good day. Yes, I have had some down moments however it has mostly been a good day. I spent most of the day with my grandpa. He picked me up and I went over to his place and did two loads of laundry.

As my second load of laundry was in the washer and first load was in the dryer, my grandpa and I finished up our Christmas shopping which means we are the only two on my dads side to be done with shopping. As my second load of laundry was in the dryer I wrapped all my gifts which is relief as I don’t have to worry about last minute shit. I even put all the stockings together.

So, even before all what I did today, I emailed my therapist inviting him to the day treatment’s holiday party. He emailed me back later in the day saying that he would make an appearance which make me happy because it shows he is interested in my recovery and me making new traditions for myself. He also said he wanted to do a brief check in with me tomorrow since I will already be there. I emailed him back and said that would be great to do a check in since I won’t have an appointment with him till the 28th of December.

When I got home from day with my grandpa, I of course checked my email and found out my therapist would be going to the holiday party tomorrow. After replying to his email, I then did some chores. I put away the laundry I did at my grandpa’s. I did the dishes and deep clean the litter box. After that I did some good self care and took an hour long shower. I usually only take a fifteen to twenty minute shower and occasionally a half an hour shower so a one hour shower for me is very rare but today I felt like it was needed. Now I am waiting for my hair to dry so I can attempt to go to bed by eleven even though it is not even nine thirty in my neck of the woods yet.

Well, I do not have much else to say. So, I am going to end this post for now. I hope everyone has a good rest of their evening and/or night. Peace Out, World!!!

Some Midnight Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is officially twelve midnight in my corner of the world. I am having trouble sleeping at the moment and am a little goofy at the moment due to my sleep medicine. I know my last two post was about my mental health appointments and I have a feeling that is where this post is going to go but I will attempt for it to not be one hundred percent about my mental health appointments.

I am just extremely please that my recovery is progressing well and in the direction that is positive. I am also grateful that my therapist and I came up with some great coping skills as well as some great self care strategies. Most have to deal with art. I love doing art.

Speaking of art, I have been doing some art since I am unable to sleep. I started of my coloring and then realized I wanted to do something a little be more creative. I then started to do a painting which is including some collaging. I am make this particular art work for my neighbor who lives across the hall from me. He has become a good friend to me. We both look out for each other and no it is not a romantic relationship.

I am really grateful for my therapist and how much he has helped me the last eight or so months. He has helped me practice some of my coping skills and has taught me some new coping skills. He has be one of the best therapist I have had.

I think I need to do some good self care by attempting to go back to bed so I can sleep. I hope everyone has a good night sleep. I would like to thank you once again for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated. Have a goodnight everyone. Peace Out, World!!!