Good Morning, World!!! It is just after four in the morning in my corner of the world and I have not slept a wink all night. It is kind of frustrating as I will be celebrating Christmas with my dads side of the family today and then head off to my moms later this evening. I just don’t want to be a cranky bucket for anyone in my family.
I most definitely don’t want to be a cranky bucket when I am at mom’s as she and my uncle want me to go to the midnight church service with them to bring in Christmas. I don’t consider myself Christian but if my mom wants me to go to church as part of her Christmas gift from me to here I might as well. It won’t hurt me going just this once.
In fact I have been looking into Buddhism for awhile now and am going to start attending a Buddhist temple in the new year. Or at least that is my goal at the moment. I know Buddhism and Christianity don’t go hand and hand but I can respect other people’s religion. My mom doesn’t like the fact that I have been looking into Buddhism which is why I think she want me to go to church as part as my gift to her.
I best be going. I am hoping to at least get some sleep in. I hope everyone has a good holiday if you celebrate Christmas. Thank you for reading my blog. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I am sleepless in Seattle once again. It has nothing to do with Lil Gertie wanting to play at this hour of the day. It has everything to do with the insomnia that I am experiencing. Insomnia sucks!!!
Since my last post, I have not only attempted to sleep but I have read. I am reading about Buddhism. It is helping me be at peace with myself and the world as a whole. The more I read about Buddhism, the more I realize it is the right spiritually for me. Having faith in something is quite helpful for me as an individual as well as my recovery.
I am going to go now. I am going to play with Lil Gertie as she appears to be playful at the moment. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I haven’t been back to sleep since my last post. I have been busy since my last post. I read a little bit. I read about Buddhism. If you regularly read my blog you know I have been looking into Buddhism. I am looking into it as I haven’t really been searching spiritual wise the last couple of years. Spirituality is a part of being in recovery. Being in recovery is something I have aspired to be and have been for quite some time. Yes, I have had bumps in the road. Yes, I have fallen however I have picked myself up and wiped myself off.
Being in recovery means doing things that are difficult. For me doing workbooks is quite challenging for me as it pushes me to aspire to be the person I am meant to be. This morning, I have chosen to work on the workbook that focuses me being queer and resilient. Being able to push myself with my gender identity, queerness and resiliency goes right along with my values in my personal recovery path with mental health challenges.
Being in recovery is a major deal for me. I was informed that I would never be in recovery from a mental health condition because my symptoms were so severe. Never tell me I can’t do something because I end up proving you wrong with being able to do it.
Thank you for reading. Have a nice Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I woken up by Lil Gertie. She licked me smack dab on the nose. Some how this cat knows when I am having a nightmare or some other symptom of PTSD. I’m not sure how she knows but she knows.
I think once I am done blogging this post, I will read. Read about Buddhism. I am learning so many different things about this religion. A religion that knows that you’re going to struggle yet doesn’t shame or guilt you into a being something you are not. It encourages you to strive to be the best you are.
Having a faith in something spiritual is key to being in recovery for anyone. It doesn’t have to be Buddhism or even Christianity. Just as you have faith in something. For me it is Buddhism. Or at least for now it is because I am looking into it, to make sure it is the right faith for me.
Thank you for reading. Have a good morning. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I just got done watching the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. He is a very funny person. I am planning on going to bed within the next hour. Lil Gertie is smack dab in the middle of my bed. If she is still there when I go to be, I will move her.
I am planning on watching M*A*S*H after I am done blogging. Watching something that is a comedy or has humor involved helps with my anxiety especially before bed. Some how laughter helps me sleep.
I haven’t really done much all day as I didn’t have much planned but an interview that got cancelled. It was a nice and relaxing day for me. I read a great deal. I read about Buddhism. I also read Buddhist Scriptures.
Thank you for reading. Goodnight and Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I am unable to sleep at the moment and it has nothing to do with my cat and every thing to deal with the symptoms of my mental health challenges. Dealing with a mental health condition is not my idea of fun yet I have learned a great deal from them. I have learned that acceptance of oneself is not easy however you can still have fun despite all the challenges the conditions bring.
For an example; painting can be fun. I love to paint. I am painting an abstract version of my cat for my grandpa per his request. My grandpa loves the idea that I am painting. He thinks it is a great way to express myself in a healthy and productive way.
Something else that being in recovery brings to me is faith. Or at least searching for a particular faith. Right now I have been reading books on Buddhism. It has given me some hope and peace that I have been looking for. Some people in my life may not like the idea that I am looking into Buddhism but they are grateful that I am searching for some type of faith even if it is not their faith.
I have been working on my strengths based recovery workbook. That part that I am working on is about attitudes. That attitudes that it is discussing at the moment is hope and courage. I am thrilled that I decided to get this workbook as I have been finding it quite helpful to me as well as to my recovery.
I find it amazing that being able to write in the middle of the night can come easy to me. Maybe it is because I am naturally a night owl or that I am more creative at night. Whatever the reason, I am glad that I can express myself in a healthy way. A way that my old therapist, Diana, would be proud of me.
Thank you for reading. Have a great morning and Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I got sleep last night which is good news. The bad news is I woke up with depression. Yes, I know I am up early but I am happy I got sleep. Waking up depressed is no fun.
I am not sure what I am going to do today. My therapist will be out of the office today so I will be checking in with his supervisor. His supervisor is a nice woman. I will be checking in with her over the phone for a fifteen minute check-in.
I am most likely going to be reading. I am going to be reading my Star Wars book. I make it a habit to read every day. I love reading. I am also going to be reading a book or two on Buddhism. One of those books happens to be Buddhist Scriptures.
I need to be finding things to do to help combat this depression. For me having plans helps me with fighting off the depression. I am hoping I can talk with my therapist supervisor early so we can come up with a plan.
Thanks for reading. It is very much appreciated from my end. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Evening, World. Since my last post I decided to work on one of my workbooks; Pathways to Recovery. It is a strengths based workbook focusing on your recovery. I am now done with the first chapter.
I also have been reading Buddhist Scriptures. Reading about Buddhism is a form of mindfulness for me. It gives me hope and a sense of peace. Finding faith that potentially will help me with my recovery path is a huge deal.
As I am writing this post I am sipping on some tea and enjoying some scented candles. Doing things like lit candles and sipping tea is extremely soothing for me. Being able to soothing myself is a good thing. I feel like I don’t deserve to self soothe.
Hello, World!!! I am now home from the Emergency Room. As I mentioned in my last post I self harmed and took myself to the Emergency Room. I punched a brick wall out of anger and frustration. I didn’t break any bones.
I am going to be reading one of my books. Not sure which one yet. No, I haven’t finished my Star Wars book but I will finish it soon. I am thinking about reading my Buddhist Scriptures.
I think I am going to go read now. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!