Hello, World!!! The last month and a half has been a whirl wind especially at work. My past and current collogues have been nothing but awesome. Despite the board directs wanting to close our agency down there is some hope because the county wants us to stay open. To me the very little hope is what is keeping me going. That and the clients we serve.
I’m also grateful to the blogging community for the support you are giving me. You fellow bloggers are a big reason I continue to blog and that is because of of the support you give to me and others.
Now on to my friends, family and my cat, Billie Dean. I wouldn’t have gone through this if it it wasn’t for your support. The same support my colleagues give me .
The love and hope a receive from all of you helps me stay in my recovery and helps me keep focused on the clients my employer serves. Thank you again from the bottom of my hear for reading my blog. Without you reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Saturday, Morning, World!!! It is five zero four (5:04) in the blasted morning here in Seattle area. In fact as I looked out the window it is currently foggy outside. In all honesty, I wish I was able to sleep despite liking fog when I don’t have to be out in it.
As far as my cat, Billie Dean, he is sound asleep. Something I wish I was doing at the moment. Sadly, Mr. Sandman forgot to stop by my place so I could get some sleep. I just would like to sleep a solid eight hours, preferably at night. I am however grateful that Billie, my cat, is still asleep or he would most likely be wanting to play. And as much I as enjoy playing with Billie, I am just way too tired to play with him at the moment which is why I am glad he is sound asleep.
Since I haven’t been able to sleep I have been listening to a podcast about philosophy. Specifically, I am listening to the podcast “Philosophize This.” Of course as I listen to this podcast, I am coloring. In fact I am coloring the creepy, morbid Disney Horror coloring book that I ordered off of Amazon. I’m hopingo to show you updates on the pictures I am coloring.
I do not have very much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Saturday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Very Early Morning, World!!! Or at least it’s very early in the morning here in my corner of the world, known as Seattle. Apparently, some readers got offended by my last post regarding coloring a morbid coloring book that is all Disney characters. I received an email from WordPress that it disturbed some of my readers but it doesn’t break any rules or community standards. All they wanted was me to put a “Trigger Warning” at the beginning of the post. I totally understand about getting triggered by things and when I do, I talk with my mental health treatment team as well as other who are in recovery. I also use the skills I learned through therapy when I am triggered. Am I sorry the post triggered other, no not really. I feel bad that I triggered others but I’m not sorry about it as it could be a way for people to learn to cope by using coping skill that help them. For me coloring this coloring book is a way for me to heal from some things that are Disney related. For me coloring and doing a morbid coloring book is a form of self care and healing for me.
As far a the morbid Disney coloring book, it appears that my cat, Billie would like to help with me at times. He doesn’t seem bothered by the morbid Disney coloring book. I love my cat and how he likes my morbid sense of humor.
I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading it. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means a great deal to me that you read my blog. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! Apparently, the sandman forgot to stop by my place as I have not been able to sleep. I have been up all night and am grateful for my cat, Billie Dean’s company. Billie has been awesome company since I adopted him in February especially on sleepless night like last night.
Since my last post I watched movies. The movies I watched were under the genre of comedy as I know that humor works great to help me relax. Hopefully, relaxed enough for me to sleep even if it is for a few hours. Anyway, Billie laid on my lap as I watched the movies. I watched Little Miss Sunshine and Ted. I love both movies.
I am going to end this particular blog post in hopes that I can get some sleep. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I am having a challenging time sleeping. I wish I wasn’t having difficulties sleeping but I am. When I can’t sleep I just say that I am Sleepless in Seattle since I live in Seattle and unable to sleep in honor of the movie Sleepless in Seattle. Anyway, not being able to sleep sucks shit.
Since I am unable to sleep, I have been watching late night television. I have watched both Jimmy Fallon and Seth Meyers. They are both extremely funny men and make late television worth watching. Being able to laugh helps make life a bit easier to live and to deal with the world around us. Something relatively new or at least I think it is new that at 1:30 in the morning a new show comes on with a woman by the name of Lilly Singh and I personally think she is funny as hell. It is also nice to see a person of color on late night television. Just wish she was on earlier. Anyway, just watching late night television helps me just deal with shit when I am unable to sleep. Being able to laugh is quite helpful for me and my mental health.
Besides watching late night television, I have been doing art work. Specifically, I have been coloring. I recently received a Day of the Dead coloring book from a friend. I am including a picture of what I colored as I started coloring it tonight and this is how far I have gotten. It is obviously not finished if you are not sight impaired. I love coloring and it helps me relax. Coloring is a type of meditation for me. For those who are sight impaired the picture of what I colored so far is below and I have included a caption with it.
Besides late night television and coloring, my cat, Billie Dean has been quite helpful for me tonight. Billie is an amazing cat. Normally he would be fighting for space on my lap as I type this blog post but he is sound to sleep on his cat tree. I love Billie so much and am beyond grateful for him. I hope he lives at least another ten years as I want him to live a long life with me. He is a great cat.
I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post so I am going to end the post. I just want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!
Hello, World!!! It is nearly midnight in my neck of the woods and I am watching The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. I love watching The Tonight Show as in makes me laugh. I love the fact that humor helps me a great deal.
As I write this blog post I am waiting for my ambien to kick in so I can get to sleep. I didn’t sleep last night and it sucks shit. In fact I didn’t sleep Saturday night either. I just hope that I can get some sleep tonight or I am not going to be able function at all tomorrow (Tuesday). Sleep has been issue for me as long as I can remember and wish it wasn’t.
My cat, Lil Gertie is being affectionate right now and I am grateful for it. With Lil Gertie being affectionate I am realizing that I am starting to have some PTSD symptoms. Specifically, flashbacks and body memories. I really dislike PTSD but I realize most of the time that it’s the past and not happening now. As far as my cat, Lil Gertie, I am petting her and trying to type at the same time.
I should get going as I think my ambien is starting to kick in and I am wanting to pay attention to my cat, Lil Gertie. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from end of things. I hope everyone has a good night of sleep. Good Night and Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! It is officially twelve midnight in my corner of the world. It being twelve midnight, I can say that I am now officially forty years old. Today is a big day for me because it is my 40th birthday. Turning forty for anyone is a major deal however it is a bigger deal for me that most people because there was a point in time where I didn’t think I would live to see forty. I didn’t think I would live to see forty because I sincerely thought I would have taken my own life. Yes, I thought I would die by suicide. Turns out that recovery happened. When recovery happens then you have the will to live most day. Yes, I did say most days. The days where the will to live is lower then that’s when you seek out the support you need to seek out. I am so happy to be forty and I hope I have at least forty plus more years of being in recovery.
Yes, I do plan on celebrating my birthday. In fact I have a couple of celebrations already planned with others. I also have my own personal plans to celebrate turning forty. In fact I hope to post about the various celebrations in a later post. I say this as I really want to finish watching The Tonight Show. It is one of my favorite shows to watch. In fact there is nothing better than bringing in any birthday than with laughter and humor.
I don’t have much more to say in this post. I am just really grateful to be alive. I am beyond grateful that I chose to be in recovery as I do not have a clue where I would be at this moment in time. So I am full of gratitude for my life, recovery and everyone who has helped me along the way.
I just want to thank everyone for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I really do enjoy sharing my story of recovery with each one of you. I hope everyone enjoys today. I know I will. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! I am having another sleepless night in Seattle due to insomnia. I wish I knew how I could get some sleep besides the typical stuff I already do. It is just frustrating as hell that I can not sleep. Not being able to sleep on the regular basis sucks and no matter what I try it may or may not help.
So, I have been watching television since my last post. I started out binge watching the Umbrella Academy as I really like this show. I realized that it was time of Saturday Night Live (SNL) and decided to watch SNL as comedy and humor help me get to sleep. After trying to sleep for about an hour after SNL got over with. After an hour of trying to sleep I decided to binge watch the Big Bang Theory. I love the show as it is hilarious.
Humor and comedy some how helps me with a great deal of things in my life. One of which is sleep. Another way humor helps is that it gets me to thinking in a more positive light and that is always a good thing. Laughter is in my opinion the best medicine.
I don’t have much more to say. I hope everyone enjoys their Sunday. I am going to attempt to get some sleep once again as it is just past three in the morning in my corner of the world. Have a great Sunday everyone. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Afternoon, World!!! I have been up for several hours now and could really use a nap. The problem with taking a nap is if I do take one, I won’t be able to get up in time to go to my volunteer job and will not be able to sleep tonight. The sad thing is I woke up in a very depressive state. A depressive state that is quite concerning for me however if I am able to get through the next few days it is my hope that the depression symptoms with start to subside. I am pretty sure that the grief I am dealing with in regards to the loss of my grandma on Valentines Day of this year (2018) could have a lot to do with the increased symptoms of my depression.
Since I have been fighting off depression and grief I decided to watch the Netflix special that Ellen DeGeneres did and is so happened the show they made into a special was here in Seattle. I wish I was able to attend it in person however I was unable to do so. I am just thrilled that I was able to watch it earlier today on Netflix to help with my mood. Ellen is quite funny and I personally think she is relatable to people or at least she is to me. After watching Ellen’s Netflix special, it was quite helpful in lifting my spirits and not making the decision to call out “sick” for my volunteer job this evening.
Not only did watching the Ellen special on Netflix help me make a good choice to go to my volunteer job tonight but helped to blog about how I am feeling about shit. Shit like the depression and grief I am dealing with at the moment. Blogging seems to help and hope that sharing my story help you my reader some how. Blogging is a great outlet for me just like watching comedy is.
I don’t have much else to say at the moment. So, I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!
Good Morning, World!!! It is 2:30 in the morning in my corner of the world and I am unable to sleep despite everything I have tried to get to sleep. Let’s begin what I know is keeping me up and the corrupts are anxiety and PTSD. Both really suck any time of day especially when you are trying to get to sleep.
Now lets get to how I have attempted to get to sleep so far. I started off with taking some Melatonin and then doing both a mindfulness and meditation practice after watching late night television. Late night television is quite helpful for me with my sleep as humor and comedy help a great deal as does doing mindfulness and meditation practices after late night television. I decided to take melatonin for the first time and took it an hour before I knew I was going to go to bed. Unfortunately, melatonin, late night television with humor and comedy as well as mindfulness and meditation practices didn’t help me get to sleep. So, that is when I took my anxiety medicine in hopes that it would help me get sleepy enough to get to sleep. Sadly this did not work either. So, I tried my new sleeping med and it appears that it is not working either. It is quite frustrating for me to not be able to sleep. My next step is take a benadryl and watch M*A*S*H in hopes that it can be helpful for some sleep.
Well, I hope everyone has a good night or morning or evening depending where they are in the world. I am saying goodnight in hopes to getting some sleep. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end that you read my blog. I am grateful for each one of you. Peace Out, World!!!