Tag Archives: Blog

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! It has been a while since I last did a weekly check-in and have been encouraged to “make more of an effort to blog on the regular basis.” I agree with the multiple individuals who have pointed this out to me. The one way I can “blog on the more regular basis” is by doing the weekly check-ins.

In fact one of the individual’s that have encouraged me to start “blogging more” is my case manager. I saw her this past Monday (September 25th) for our regularly scheduled appointment. My case manager checked-in with me about what happened to me and am greatly appreciative for it. We spent most of our half hour session discussing ways to use my skills to help me through the not so good moments. One of those skills is blogging and that how the topic came up. We also discussed me doing some art work after I showed my case manager some of the art the I did in art group before our session. We also discussed how I can use other skills that I have in my tool box which I will bring up one that I’m surprisingly enjoying later on in this post. Before the session ended my case manager wanted to make sure I was going to attend my doctors appointment the next day (Tuesday). I reassured I would.

In fact as mentioned in my previous post, I did go to my doctors appointment. My doctor and I discussed how I was doing as well as checking in with me regarding my mental health. She is “concerned” that I’m “not receiving the proper mental health” that I need. I reassured my doctor that I am. I informed her that I am not only receiving both therapy and case management services but attending three groups. She inquired more about the groups and I happily obliged. My doctor appeared to be content with all this at least for a moment.

Since I’m on the topic of groups, I attended all three groups this past week. The first group I went to is held on Monday’s and is an Art group. I love attending the Art Group however I don’t attend every Monday but I did this past Monday. I highly enjoy attending it and both my case manager and doctor would like me “attending every week because being creative appears to be of help” to me. I can’t argue with that.

The second group I am attending is on Thursdays and about Sexual Health and Relationships. Primarily it’s about sexual health. In fact my case manager co-facilitates this group.  I’m not quite sure about this group yet because of what happened. I’ve only attended once and it has only been a group in existence for two weeks. My case manager recommended this group to me before I got sexually assaulted. I’m toying with the fact if its a good idea to continue with this group however it’s something to discuss with my therapist as well continue discussing with my case manager.

A group that needs no discussing for me to continue for me to attend is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) on Fridays. In fact attendance is a requirement of DBT and is one that has a waitlist to for is which why once I finally got into it, I make it a priority to attend DBT. I did attend yesterday. In fact I admitted to group and will admit to you that I was willful with not doing part of my homework. In fact I don’t want to do part of my homework that is due next Friday. I will however do the homework as I know it will ultimately help me. Validating others is easy. Self validation is not so easy and it’s something that would hopefully help me. In fact I am pretty sure self validation will be helpful.

Another thing that is helpful and a major part of DBT is mindfulness. In fact I mentioned earlier in this blog post that I would bring up a skill that I have found surprisingly enjoyable which is mindfulness and meditation. In fact a fellow peer (specialist) suggested an app that I have found quite helpful and is how I found out that mindfulness and mediation is enjoyable. The app is called Calm and I highly recommend using it if you have a smart phone. I have found it quite helpful. The longest stretch I’ve used the app is seven days in a row. Unfortunately, that stretch ended when I was assaulted. That’s why my case manager encouraged me to start using it again since I have found the app helpful and enjoyable. In fact she informed me that she will let my therapist know about the app. In fact I have a two day stretch as of today. Hopefully by the time I see my therapist it will be a five day stretch. I’m hoping that I can make mindfulness and meditation a daily habit.

Speaking of habits, I need to make blogging a habit. Which is why I am planning on making an effort to put it into my schedule to blog. That’s why I want to make I at least do my weekly check-in post.

As I end this post I want to thank you for reading. I hope that everyone has a great day and Peace Out!!!

Woo Hoo; 200 Followers!!!

Posted on by Gertie

WOO HOO!!! I finally got my 200th follower. It has taken three years and three months to get my 200th follower. I know it might not be a big deal to you but is to me. It means that I’m actually reaching people who want to read what I have to say.

If you are new to reading my blog, WELCOME!!!! This blog was started to help educate individuals who do not struggle with a mental health condition that people like myself who do struggle can live productive and fulfilling lives in hopes to lessen the stigma that goes with having a mental health condition. I did at one point in time have an education piece of my blog regarding mental health and hope to get that started back up again.  The other aspect of my blog was and is to give those who do struggle with a mental health condition hope that there is recovery. Recovery is not an easy process and is non-linear. There will be bumps in the road and relapses in symptoms of mental health conditions. I hope that I can be of some encouragement to those who have mental health conditions. Again, I want to thank you all for following my blog.

I hope everyone has a good rest of the week. I appreciate each on everyone of you. Peace Out!!!

Not Good Start; The Rest Will Be Good

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I’m up at 4:09 in the morning because of a nightmare. A nightmare that is a symptom of PTSD. I highly dislike having PTSD and would not wish this on my worst enemy.

Waking up from a nightmare is never a great start to any day. I did have Junior by my side helping me through the after effects of the nightmare. Junior sat with me as I cried through the pain. The emotional and physical pain the nightmare brought. Yes, PTSD symptoms can cause not just emotional pain but physical pain as well. As I allow myself to cry, Junior held me to help me feel safe.

After I finished crying, I gave myself a few moments to recompose myself. As I recomposed myself I decided I will blog. Blog about what!?!? Nobody knows not even me.

I am looking forward to what today has to bring. I will be attending a continuing education training for Peer Support Specialist. Its on Ethics and Boundaries in Peer Support. Ethics and boundaries is something we all need in our personal and professional lives. This continuing education training I am attending will help me with my career when I get back into being a Peer Specialist.

Having a career as a peer specialist is know when to step away from things to focus on ones recovery. That’s what I am doing. As much as I would love to be working as a Peer at the moment, I realize focusing on my recovery is important. I just hope that me focusing on my recovery will help me grow as a person and as a Peer Specialist.

Anyway, I’m thinking that I should end this particular blog post for now. I need to get ready for the day ahead. I want be in a good space when I attend the continuing education training I will be attending. If I’m not too tired when I get home from the continuing education training, I hope to blog about what I learned I hope everyone has a great work week. Happy Monday and Peace Out!!!

The Reawaking of Weekly Check-Ins

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon!!! About a year and a half ago or so, I joined a blogging event through WordPress that occurred on the weekly basis. This event focused on how your week went and when the event ended I decided to continue to do it but on a different day. I chose Saturdays as Saturday is the last day of the week.

Unfortunately, due to a relapse in my not so lovely depression symptoms as well as symptoms of other mental health diagnosis’s, I ended up stopping the weekly check-ins. It’s something I wish I didn’t stop and wish I started the weekly check-ins sooner than now. The weekly check-ins, ultimately helped me with my mental health symptoms and it also kept you the reader update date on what was going on in my life as well as keeping you interested in reading my blog.

Now that you are aware that the weekly check-ins are now being awoken; I guess, I will do my weekly check-in for this week. I pretty much isolated most of this week with a couple of exceptions. The first exception was on the 4th of July when I went to celebrate it at a friends picnic at their house. I’m glad I went because attending the 4th of July celebration helped me get out of my head as well as helped me forget even for a few moments that I have a mental health condition. Plus, I had fun spending time with people who truly care about me.

The second exception is when I went to an appointment to see my case manager’s supervisor on Thursday. I saw him this past week instead of my therapist or case manager because they both happened to be on vacation at the same time for week of their vacations. Normally, I would be “okay” with not seeing someone on my treatment team for a week or two but due to, two recent suicide attempts as well as not improving as quickly as I have in recent years from a crisis. My case managers supervisor is a nice dude and is quite helpful. He is concerned about “the lack of progress as well as the lack of purpose” I have in my life at the moment. He has every right to be concerned about the lack of progress as well as the lack of purpose of my life. As I mentioned in my last post that work gave me sense of purpose and the supervisor knows all to well of the purpose work gave me. I discussed with him about wanting go back to school and he appeared to be of support of this. Having the support of going back to school gives me hope.

Hope that I want to give to others, which is why I am needing to end this post. I am needing to get ready to go so I can volunteer to give others hope. Before I go to give hope to others, I need to eat. I hope everyone has a good rest of their weekend. I will be making every effort to do weekly check-ins every Saturday. Have a wonderful day everyone. Peace Out!!!

Poetry, Day Four: Journey

Posted on by Gertie

Fork in the Road

by Gertie

There is a fork in the road

Which way to go.

Continue on the miserable journey you already know

or choose the one less traveled one.

What the hell?

It couldn’t be any worse than the journey,

I’m already on.

Turns out that fork in road changed

my life I would have never imagined.

A life worth living.

A life in recovery.

Something that wouldn’t have happened if

I didn’t have that fork in the road

to choose what recovery journey I wanted to take.

Poetry, Day Three: Friend

Posted on by Gertie

Untitled Poem

by Gertie

Looking back on life,

its the friends that helped me through the rough moments.

Friends that have become family

and accepted me as me;

no matter what life throws at us

our friendship will always

be strong.

Poetry, Day Two: Face

Posted on by Gertie

Face Full of Pain

by Gertie

Look at their face,

you wont see the pain that they hide.

Look at their arms full of scars,

you might get a hint of the pain,

they deal with everyday.

You don’t care

as you fear they might

harm you.

Look at their face,

deep inside their eyes,

then and only then

you will see the pain

they are really in.

Poetry, Day One: Water

Posted on by Gertie

A Sense of Peace

by Gertie

Water brings a peace.

A peace nothing else can bring.

Peace that brings freedom.

Improving My Blogging Skills, Once Again

Posted on by Gertie

I’ve been thinking a great deal over the past week about doing one of WordPress’s courses on blogging.  I’ve decided I’m going be re-taking WordPress’s “Intro To Poetry.” I took it a few years ago and enjoy it immensely so I’ve decided to take it again.

As you may already know if you read my blog on the regular basis is that, I’ve been struggling with blogging the last seven or so months due to a relapse in my mental health diagnosis. I figure if I do one of the blogging courses that it will help me get back into blogging on the regular basis. If I blog on the regular basis then maybe, things will start improving a lot more in regards to my mental health.

I apologize for the short post but it is goal to keep you the reader, reading. Have an good week everyone. Peace out!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

It’s the middle of the night in my part of the world. I woke up with a stupid nightmare. A nightmare that was a little bit more challenging that the typical PTSD nightmare I usually deal with. The nightmare was that of four babies saying I killed them. Diana, my former therapist, thought that it is my subconscious attempting to deal with the miscarriages of two sets of twins. It makes sense especially since I blame myself for the miscarriages even though the doctors don’t have a clue or a reason for the miscarriage.

Despite still dealing with the grief of two miscarriages of two sets of twins, Junior and I still want to start a family. We aren’t exactly trying to have children but we aren’t using any type of birthday control or protection either. If it happens, it happens. Whether or not we conceive and have biological children we want to adopt at least two children from foster care. We have a lot of love to give and want to share that love with the world.

Okay, on to another subject as I’m not wanting to deal with the grief of miscarrying two sets of twins. So, I’m going to talk about blogging. As I informed you in my last post, I have been blogging for three years now. I was really good at blogging on the regular basis when I first started and when I started working fulltime I didn’t make time to blog and then I became depressed and lost all interest in everything including blogging. Now that I don’t work anymore, I need to make an effort to blog on the regular basis. Most everyone knows that if you blog that blogging on the regular basis is a way to keep your followers reading and to attain new followers. I’m hoping that Junior and Mama Bear will be able to blog from their point of view on my blog at least twice a month each. We all get busy and that’s why they haven’t posted much.

Anyway, that’s enough about the boring topic of blogging. As I switch to yet another topic, I’m not sure how I’m feeling at the moment. I’m not really wanting to deal with the emotions that are popping up currently. I also know if I don’t deal with the emotions and stuff them that’s when unhealthy coping mechanisms pop up.

As my emotions pop up, I realize I need to end this post and try to go back to sleep as I have an appointment with my case manager. Before I go back to bed I plan on coloring first so I can relax. Have good night and peace out!!!