Phuck Guns; A Shooting Woke Many People Up Including Myself

Good Morning, World!!! I feel asleep binge watching a television show on Netflix like I informed you I was going to do in my last post. Unfortunately, I was woken up by gun shots from outside my apartment building and not the television show that was still playing on Netflix.  No, I will no discuss gun control in this post but might speak of ii in another post.

I looked out my window and saw the shooter still shooting the person who was already on the ground. Unfortunately, the shooting victim didn’t make it but the shooter was thankfully caught with the gun still on their person. I was one of many individuals who called 911. There was but load of police, paramedics and firefighters to deal with what happened in front of my building. Sadly, the shooting victim was a person who lived in my building the person who did the shooting use to live in my apartment build who was recently evicted.

Both the fire department and police departments sent out their Chaplin’s to talk with us who live in my apartment building. Neither the police department nor the fire department had to do that but I am glad they did. They also called out the Red Cross to help us out if we needed to talk with crisis workers. The management company of apartment building I live in is actually bringing crisis workers who deal with this sort of thing. The crisis workers will be here later today and the rest of the week.

Good thing I have my cat to help me through all this even though she was scared of the sound of the gun shots.  She was freaked out but not as freaked out as I thought should would be. She has been by my side ever since the shooting when I have been in my apartment. Lil Gertie, my cat, has been quite helpful for me in regards to trauma, PTSD, depression and other mental health challenges.

Good thing  I am going to group therapy as well as seeing my therapist.  Talking with my therapist about this and everything that has happened this wee with being assaulted in the hospital on Sunday plus the multiple fire alarms will be a great help to me. Being triggered is not a good thing. Even though some of the fire alarms going off over the weekend were due to malfunctions, a couple of the fire alarms were due to actual fires because people started cooking and decided to do drugs and well their stove and/or kitchen caught on fire.

So, yes, I have had quite a week that most likely create more PTSD symptoms as well as trigger other PTSD symptoms. I am happy that I will be seeing my therapist today. Also it is a good thing I have a busy day today as I mention in my last post or maybe the post before my last post.  I am happy that I will be able keep what happened earlier out of my mind a little bit easier today as it is going to be a busy one and I get to see my therapist and spend time with friends later. I also have a work training which will be quite helpful. Tomorrow (Thursday) is the day I am most worried about however I will discuss that with my therapist today and crisis counselors that will be in my apartment building for the rest of the week a maybe part of next week.

Like I said I will not discuss gun control in this particular post but I want you to be forewarned that there might be a post later on in regards to gun control as I am grieving along side with my neighbor of the shooting death of a neighbor. Please keep me and my neighbors in your thoughts and send out positive thoughts and vibes our way and maybe even prayers. I am not praying person but it never hurts to ask for them.

Thank you so much for reading my blog especially this one since it is a triggering one as well as a very lengthy post. I appreciate that you all read my blog. I hope everyone has a good Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!

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Ugh!!! Someone Pulled The Fire Alarm

Hello, World!!! I’m getting frustrated as hell. Someone keeps pulling the pull station and it sets off the fire alarm. I was in the middle of working on one of my workbooks. I am now shaken up by this. It triggers my PTSD as I been in two fires.

Now that I have been triggered, I am going to do some mindfulness and meditation practices. I need to get back to being relaxed so I can sleep tonight.

I hope everyone has a great night. Thank you for reading my blog. Goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 10, Let the Scene Write Itself

Good Morning, World!!! Today’s assignment appears to be easy. Or it’s a simple one for me. It pretty much ask to let the scene write itself. In fact it was and is the scene I am waking up to at the moment.

Junior woke me up in bed by giving me a simple kiss on the cheek. He then served  me some breakfast me bed. He made me French toast covered in banana’s and caramel, strawberries and cream oatmeal and chocolate milk. Junior made me breakfast in bed to reassure me that his love for me grows for me each day.

I already knows how much he loves me. I wish I was able to show my love for him a little bit more however as of lately it’s been difficult to do so. Junior understands and will be there for me no matter what. I love Junior with all my heart.

I think I should end this post for now as Junior is finishing up getting ready for work. He is doing his 24 hour shift as a firefighter. I love him so much. Both of our hearts goes to the firefighters fighting fires in California. Have a good weekend!!! Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been An Interesting Day

     Good Monday Evening!!! Today has been an interesting day. On my bus ride to my appointment with my therapist, a fellow passenger passed out because he was so drunk. Of course the bus driver had to stop the bus and check on the dude. The bus driver had to call the police as well as the fire department. The police showed up as well as the fire engine and paramedics. As the firefighters were trying to help the drunk dude came to and hit one of them. The police then tackled the guy and with the help of the paramedics and other firefighters he was handcuffed to the gurney and put in the back of the ambulance. Of course myself and the other passengers had to give witness statements to the police. Finally after everyone gave their statement the bus was on its way again. I got off at my bus stop and walked about a half mile to my appointment. On the walk from the bus stop to my appointment I found $20. Finding money is a rare thing for me.

     I of course made it to my appointment with my therapist on time. In fact I was 45 minutes early. I’m usually an hour early due to OCD tendencies. While waiting for my therapy appointment the admin assistant got me my stuffed Eeyore that I have my therapist hold for me so when I am waiting to see her I can hold on to him. My stuffed Eeyore also sits in on my sessions with me because its easier to talk with a stuffed animal to hold. As I was holding Eeyore, in the waiting room I pulled out a Wonder Woman graphic novel to read. If you are a regular reader or follower of my blog you know I am a huge Wonder Woman fan. About 15 minutes before my session an old high school friend walks into the waiting room of the mental health clinic I see my therapist at. This high school friend was seeking therapy for the first time in her life. She of course was seeing a different clinician. It was nice to “catch up” with an old friend.

    My session with my therapist Diana was quite draining. We discussed what happened on the bus then I pulled out 3 copies of what I wanted to go into my treatment plan. Of course many of things I want to work on can be condensed and we did that. In fact it was getting a bit overwhelming for me. We had to take a break from it and we talked about why it was overwhelming. I had come to the conclusion that I’ve been defined by my mental illness so long that it scares me what it would be like to not be “crazy.” Diana my therapist says that I’ve dealt with my mental illness for so long that now that I am walking in recovery I’m learning what its like to not be “crazy.” She also says that I’m in the process of redefining on who I am. She is absolutely correct. I am redefining who I am. Recovery from a mental illness is difficult work. I still have a great deal to work through so I am no where done with needing treatment but I am an active participant in my treatment planning. I still have to work through all the trauma I’ve been through when I was a child as well as an adult. That’s going to be a long process. So Diana and I still need to finish working my treatment/recovery plan and we both hope that we can continue to work on in in the next session next Monday. I never knew how draining it would be. Working on changing for the better is not only draining and difficult but a good thing. (Side Note: Diana is a pseudonym for my therapist)

   So after my therapy appointment I took the bus home. Thankfully nothing eventful happened on my bus ride home. In fact on my bus ride home, I read A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens. I am really enjoying the book. It’s going to take me awhile to read it due to my dyslexia but that is okay with me. Like I’ve said before, I enjoy reading.

   As I am blogging right now, I am at my boyfriends house. He is fixing me dinner. He is a good cook. Not as good as my grandma but good enough. He cooks better than me and I love to cook. Hell, my boyfriend loves to cook as well. He learned to cook from his mom. I learned to cook from my dad and grandma. My paternal grandpa is not a very good cook. My maternal grandpa was an awesome cook. Anyway, my boyfriend is making me spaghetti. I love spaghetti. I should get going. I want to see if my boyfriend will let me help him finish cooking. After dinner we are going to watch a movie. Not sure what movie but it’s going to be a comedy.

   Well, I best be going. I hope to blog again tomorrow. Have a good rest of the evening. Enjoy the rest of your Monday. Well at least enjoy the 4 hours that’s left of Monday. Peace out and enjoy life.