Two In The Morning Ramblings

Good Morning, World!!! It is two o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world. I am of course having trouble sleeping once again. Sleep hasn’t come easy to me recently and as frustrating as it is, I am glad to have the skills I need to help me through sleepless nights.

One of the many skills I used tonight is art. I painted some. I also did some collaging. I actually collaged on some of my paintings and I personally think it looks really cool. But then again beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Another skill I have been doing on sleepless nights like tonight is reading. I am still reading Ship of Magic. Yes, I realize it is taking me a while to read it but I’m enjoying it. Enjoying it is all that matters

I have also worked on my workbooks. Specifically, The Mindfulness Workbook as it gives me ideas to calm my mind to help me sleep or at least get some rest. Doing any of the workbooks is helpful to me and my recovery.

Thank you for reading. Goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

Thursday Night Ramblings

Hello, World!!! It is eleven o’clock at night in my corner of the world. I have attempted to go to sleep yet I am unable to do so. I am hoping that I can get to sleep tonight as I took a nap earlier today because I was unable to sleep last night.

I have been using the Calm app to help me with my sleep. I find that it does help me get some great rest if I’m unable to sleep. Mindfulness and meditation helps me sleep as well as relax because it gets me to be in the present moment.

Being in present moment is always a good thing as it means I am in the here and now. Being in the here and now means I am able to enjoy the moment even if it is a negative moment. It is my goal to enjoy each moment as it comes even if it is a not so good moment.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Recovery Ramblings

Good Evening, World!!! It has been an uneventful day for me and right now that is a good thing. It’s a good thing because recent events regarding an assault I experienced and the death of my grandma.

I have been doing one of my workbooks for most of the day. The workbook I have been doing is The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook. I have been finding it quite helpful for me not just in regards to my gender identity and sexual orientation but my recovery as well.

In fact realizing my gender identity and sexual orientation is apart of my recovery. Something that Junior is proud of me for acknowledging as well as accepting me as I am and loving me. I consider myself as a gender fluid, non-binary, pansexual individual and Junior loves me as I am.

I have also been doing another workbook called The Mindfulness Workbook to help me keep up my mindfulness practice’s. I have been finding this helpful with my recovery as well as my everyday life. It’s been quite helpful in ways I never thought were possible. It has been helping me be more mindful of the present moment.

Speaking of being mindful of the present moment, I realize I am hungry and need to eat. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World.

Tough Moment = Reading Wonder Woman

Good Morning, World!!! It’s a beautiful sunny, frigid day in Seattle with snow on the ground. As beautiful as it is outside, I am emotionally not doing so well at the moment. I think part of it has to do with not being able to sleep for the last two nights.

As, I struggle to sleep I think I am going to read some Wonder Woman comic books as it is helpful to me. Plus it’s quite enjoyable to read comic books. I am happy that I have a dad that got me collecting Wonder Woman comics as it is something I can do for the rest of my life.

I am going to go and read. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Educational Piece: Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) is a type of depression that’s related to changes in seasons — SAD begins and ends at about the same times every year. If you’re like most people with SAD, your symptoms start in the fall and continue into the winter months, sapping your energy and making you feel moody. Less often, SAD causes depression in the spring or early summer.

Treatment for SAD may include light therapy (phototherapy), medications and psychotherapy.

Don’t brush off that yearly feeling as simply a case of the “winter blues” or a seasonal funk that you have to tough out on your own. Take steps to keep your mood and motivation steady throughout the year.

In most cases, seasonal affective disorder symptoms appear during late fall or early winter and go away during the sunnier days of spring and summer. Less commonly, people with the opposite pattern have symptoms that begin in spring or summer. In either case, symptoms may start out mild and become more severe as the season progresses.

Signs and symptoms of SAD may include:

  • Feeling depressed most of the day, nearly every day
  • Losing interest in activities you once enjoyed
  • Having low energy
  • Having problems with sleeping
  • Experiencing changes in your appetite or weight
  • Feeling sluggish or agitated
  • Having difficulty concentrating
  • Feeling hopeless, worthless or guilty
  • Having frequent thoughts of death or suicide

Fall and winter SAD

Symptoms specific to winter-onset SAD, sometimes called winter depression, may include:

  • Oversleeping
  • Appetite changes, especially a craving for foods high in carbohydrates
  • Weight gain
  • Tiredness or low energy

Spring and summer SAD

Symptoms specific to summer-onset seasonal affective disorder, sometimes called summer depression, may include:

  • Trouble sleeping (insomnia)
  • Poor appetite
  • Weight loss
  • Agitation or anxiety

 

Sleepless in Snowy Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! I am unable to sleep however I am enjoying watching the snow fall. It is rare when it snows in Seattle so it is both exciting and annoying. Exciting because it is beautiful and not a common occurrence in Seattle. It is an annoyance because nobody really knows how to drive in snow here in Seattle counting myself. But then again I don’t have a car and take public transportation.

Besides watching the snow fall, I am watching the Winter Olympics. I am loving the fact that the Olympics are on as they have been quite helpful for me get through some rough moments as well as some sleepless nights like tonight.

I am get going and watch the snow fall as well as the Olympics. Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Woo Hoo!!! U.S.A Women Win Gold In Hockey!!!

Hello, World!!! I’m watching the United States versus Canada women’s hockey game and the U.S just won. Woo Hoo!!! As many of you know that the United States and Canada have a huge rivalry in hockey and tonight’s Gold Medal game went into a shoot out round to determine the winner. Happily and  surprisingly the U.S.A won.

Watching the Olympics have been quite helpful for me especially since my grandma passed away a week ago today. It’s been quite helpful for me during sleepless nights as well. I really miss my grandma and I think that the U.S.A winning the women’s hockey is a sign from my grandma that I do have the strength to carry on.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Snowing In Seattle

IMG_0281Hello, World!!! As you can tell with the above picture, snow is falling in Seattle. Snow is pretty and cool just as long as you don’t have to go out in it unless it is for fun. I have mixed emotions regarding snow but right now, I am going to live in the present and enjoy it.

One way I’ll enjoy this weather is by drinking hot coco and reading Wonder Woman comic books. There is nothing like wearing comfy pajama’s and reading comics while drinking hot chocolate on a cold winter’s night.

Well, I want to get going to enjoy my comics and hot chocolate. Thank you for reading. Have a great night. Peace Out, World!!!

Rambling About Sh*t

Good Evening, World!!! Today, has had its ups and downs yet I am grateful for both. Grateful, that I am able to be an okay enough place to have gratitude toward both the ups and the downs for the day. If it were December I don’t think I would have been grateful for the downs I experienced.

I discussed this with Gilbert today in our session and he stated that I am making a lot of progress. Progress with my recovery. Progress with my recovery that I am finally starting see in myself. Not only did we discuss the progress but we discuss the physical assault I experienced on Monday evening as well as the death of my grandma last Wednesday. We discussed on what I can do during the down moments when dealing with the death of my grandma and the assault I experienced.

One of those things I came up with was to journal. To journal about the strength my grandma had. Not just journal in any of my journals but my Wonder Woman journal. I journal in my Wonder Woman journal when I think it is going to be about someone who as some form of strength because Wonder Woman is a strong superhero.

Since we are on the topic of Wonder Woman I also discussed with Gilbert that reading my Wonder Woman comics would be helpful. He agreed as he thinks Wonder Woman gives me some form a strength and he is right. Yes, I know Wonder Woman is a fictional character but she does give me strength.

Thank you for reading. It is very much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 10: Let the Scene Write Itself

As I look out the west window of my living room, I notice that the sun is attempting to come out from behind the clouds. I quickly realize there is a bald eagle sitting in the tree outside my window looking in. I’m wondering to myself what he wants but realize that the eagle is paying attention to a squirrel on a lower branch of the tree.

I quickly turn my attention to my living room as the eagle went after the poor squirrel. I see my art supplies and a canvass or two waiting to be painted. I’m wondering if I should paint the eagle and squirrel in the tree. Wouldn’t be the best painting in the world but would be a reminder of what I saw today.

I continue to scan my living room and see music sheets on the floor. I really need to pick those up or practice the music on my flute. What music piece would I practice? I think I need to put playing my flute into my daily schedule.

I look at my couch and see the book I am reading. I really want to finish the book as soon as possible. Its not that difficult to take time out to read a few chapters a day. Oh how I love to read.

I look over to see what time it is on my Wonder Woman clock and it says 12:34pm. I’m thinking it’s time to eat some lunch. Thanks!!! Peace Out, World!!!