Tag Archives: 12 Steps

A Relaxing Saturday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It has been a nice and relaxing Saturday for me. A Saturday that was surprisingly relaxing and I hope that it can happen again soon. I think one of the reasons why it was so relaxing is because I had therapy yesterday and needed to recharge my batteries today.

One of the things that I did today was go to the farmers market in my neighborhood. It is the same farmers market I go to every Saturday and enjoy going. As per usual I bought myself a yummy breakfast sandwich. I ran into an elderly couple who remembered me from a couple of weeks ago. We talked for a while and had a good conversation.

When I arrived back home from the farmers market I decided to attend an online twelve step meeting. A meeting which I was thrilled to attend. I enjoy attending this particular twelve step program as it focuses on what I can do and how I can help myself versus focusing on the person with the addiction.

Another thing I did was color. I am coloring a gigantic poster I bought from Stuff2Color.com. In fact Stuff2Color.com is located in the Pacific Northwest which is partly why I buy coloring stuff from them. Even though they are located in Oregon I consider them local. I attempt to buy local especially when it comes to being creative as well as food.

I do not have much more to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It is Saturday evening here in Seattle and that means it is that time of the week where I give you my weekly check in. A check where I tell you what has happened for me during the past week. A week that doesn’t always as planned.

I started this week by attending an online twelve step meeting. A meeting that had a focus of step one and will continue to focus on step one for the next three to four weeks so folks can work on the step and not feel rushed doing it. I really connected with this group and let my sponsor know that. She will “attend” with me tomorrow as she has another sponsee that is doing step one plus my sponsor will be in attendance to support me.

Besides attending online twelve step meetings, I returned back to work. I am happy to be back to work despite having a corrective action plan (CAP) looming over my head. I also found out that I will be having my CAP meeting this Monday. I don’t think most of the CAP is fair but I will take responsibility for the parts that I know is fair like missing too many days even though I have medical reasons for missing too many days. As far as the adaptability part, I know I have issues with it however it is disability related and feel like I am in trouble due to my disability. I am also getting a CAP due to how my annual review went but that was done three and half months early which is why I am fighting the CAP. I don’t understand why I wasn’t informed sooner about what I need to work on.

I also had therapy this week. My therapist and I discussed many different things including work. We discussed coping skills around work as well as the mental health symptoms that I deal with on the daily basis. We talked about how attending twelve step meetings is “helpful” for me and my recovery. We also discussed how my symptoms are not as severe due to me doing daily mindfulness meditation practices at least twice daily. My therapist is awesome and I appreciate the fact that she not only points out what I need to work on but points out what I am doing well on.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! This past week has had plenty of ups and downs but then again, life is a roller coaster ride. A roller coaster ride that is never the same.

The roller coast ride was mainly due to work related stuff. In fact it has been nothing but drama and when I can go back to work. The great news is I am going back to work this Monday (October 16th). The not so great news is that I will be getting a corrective action plan (CAP) for various things in which I was not informed of till I received my annual review three and a half months early before going back on medical leave. Little does work know, that I have been searching for a new job. In fact I have a pre-interview and an interview with two different potential employers.

Due to the work drama, I am so glad I have been doing mindfulness meditation practices twice daily. Actually, it has been more than that but I schedule to do mindfulness meditation practice twice daily as it helps with my mental health symptoms.

In fact mindfulness meditation is a part of the twelve step program I am in. I am really happy that I am in this particular twelve step program as I think it will be helpful for me.

I don’t have much more to write about in this particular blog post. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Too Awake to Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am way too wake to sleep or as other people would say, I am wide awake. I am wide awake partly because of insomnia and the other reason is because I ended up taking a late nap that lasted about three hours. Yes, I have attempted to sleep but I am unable to.

Since I am unable to sleep, I have been keeping myself busy. I have attended two online twelve step meetings. Ironically, both meetings focused on step one. I say ironically because my sponsor and I started doing step work together and I am working on step one. I really enjoy attending the twelve step meetings as they are quite helpful for me and my recovery.

Attending online twelve step meetings and working on step is not the only way I have been working on my recovery. The other way I have been working on my recovery is doing recovery based and skills based workbooks. Doing workbooks helps me build upon the skills I already have and reinforce the skills that I already have.

I have also done other stuff besides recovery focused stuff. One thing I have been doing is reading. I am currently reading two books but the book I have been reading tonight is Pet Cemetery by Stephen King. Since it was Friday the 13th and Halloween is coming up, I decided to read a horror book. I am really enjoying Pet Cemetery.

Not only have I been reading but I have been doing some artwork. The type of artwork I have been doing is coloring. I really enjoy coloring and I am coloring a giant poster I bought from Stuff2Color.com. As I colored I listened to some music. I listened to my childhood playlist. My childhood play list consist of music that I listened to that brings back happy memories.

I do not have anything else to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

fRiDaY tHe 13tH

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday the 13th, World!!! It is only nine in the morning here in Seattle and I am already feeling accomplished with my day. Accomplished because I have already done so much already today and it is not even close to twelve noon yet.

I am feeling accomplished because I started out the day doing a mindfulness meditation via the Calm App. Doing a daily mindfulness meditation practice is quite helpful for me. In fact I start everyday with one and I end everyday with one. Sometimes I even do more to help get my head in a better space.

After my mindfulness meditation practice, I read the newspaper. The newspaper I read is the Seattle Times which is a local newspaper to Seattle. Sadly, there isn’t much good news to report and I wish there was some good news to report.

When I was done reading the news paper, I attended two online twelve step meetings. Yes, you read right, two twelve step meetings. Twelve step meetings that I find helpful for me and my own recovery.

Speaking of the twelve steps I am doing some step work. I am working on step one. The twelve step program I am has a twelve step workbook you can work with alongside your sponsor. The twelve step program suggests that the sponsors have done all the steps themselves at least once before becoming a sponsor. In fact that is one requirement I have as sponsee is that my sponsor had done the twelve steps at least once and has been in recovery at least a year. In fact my sponsor informed me that she would like me to take the steps at my own pace which I like but I have to work on it most days of the week.

Now lets talk about what today is. As you the reader already knows; today is Friday the 13th. Some people think that today is bad luck I am not sure why people think Friday the 13th as there are so many theories that it is just way too hard to figure out the “most popular” theory.

I do not have much more to talk about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World

Just Another Post

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I don’t know how to feel right now. Depression is hitting me hard tonight but at least I got some sleep in earlier. Even though I only got about four hours of sleep I am grateful for the much needed sleep as I was tired. Hell, I am still tired which is why I am probably slightly depressed.

Depression sucks but at least I know how to help myself. One of the things I have been doing is some step work. Specifically, I am working on step one. I really like the fact that the twelve step program I am in has its own twelve step work book. My sponsor is willing to go at my own pace working on the steps as she knows how challenging doing the steps can be.

Since the steps can be hard to do, I’ve done some self care. One of the forms of self care that I have done is to read. I have decided to switch books to read. I am now reading Abraham Lincoln; Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith. So far the book is good but I am only thirty pages into the book.

I also have been doing art work. Specifically, I have been coloring. I have been coloring to some music. As I color I have been listening to my childhood memories playlist on Spotify. I love being able to color as I listen to music.

I do not have much more to talk about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of Day Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Good , World!!! So, far this is my third blog post of the day and I would be lying if I informed you if I wasn’t struggling. I am struggling at the moment however I have hope. Having hope is a good thing especially when one’s depression is acting up.

As you know from an earlier post, I am struggling a great deal. Mainly, due to not sleeping the last two nights which sucks, but I have kept myself. I, of course have colored as well as read a horror book. The thing I am most proud of is having my first conversation with my sponsor.

That conversation led me to start the first step. The first step is a huge step for everyone involved in any twelve step program. Being part of a twelve step program is healing and gives a sense of community with the meetings and having a sponsor. During my conversation with my sponsor she asked me to attend at least one more meeting today as I already attended one and have the time to attend a second one for the day. I did attend the second meeting and it was awesome.

After the meeting I decided to work on some workbooks for my mental health recovery. I worked on two separate workbooks and I am grateful that I did. I think the workbooks will help me build new skills and reinforce the skills that I currently do have. Recovery is a process and is non-linear. It also looks differently to each person as everyone’s recovery journey is unique to the individual walking along the recovery path.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader continue to read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

First Conversation with Sponsor

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I had my first conversation with my sponsor a few moments ago. My sponsor asked what I was looking for in a sponsor in which I did inform her what I was looking for which is someone with great boundaries. We then discussed how she sponsors and I like the fact that she only sponsors no more than three people at a time.

We will have regular phone calls every week at a set day and time with the option to meet up. I have been given the assignment of starting step one. I will be reading a little bit in the yellow workbook and doing at least one question. I will also start reading step one in the Big Red Book (BRB).

I am looking forward to working the steps and growing as a human being. This is going to be hard work and I am so willing to do it. My recovery depends on it.

(Side Note: Getting a sponsor is not by any means that I am going to stop therapy or anything else that helps with my recovery. Recovery looks different for everyone.)

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my perspective that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Do Food Handlers permit class and test

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (First day at actual job site)
  • Spend time with Billie when I arrive home

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work from home as I have online training
  • Dinner with neighbors who are friends

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Spend time with Billie when I get home from work
  • Attend an online 12 step group

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Spend time with Billie after I get home from work

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Dinner with a friend
  • Get home and spend time with Billie

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Spend day at grandpa’s house
  • Do laundry while at grandpa’s
  • Make grandpa dinner while at his place

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness Meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Spend time with my cat, Billie
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • If still having issues with phone, go back to Verizon
  • Color
  • Read
  • Spend more time with Billie the cat

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Lyft to first day of work
  • Work
  • Read Comics on Public Transportation from work
  • Get home and spend time with Billie my cat
  • Color
  • Evening Walk

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Work (I think remotely for training)
  • Read Comic books
  • Spend time with Billie, my cat
  • Color
  • Evening Walk

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Work (I think remotely for training)
  • Read Comic books
  • Spend time with Billie, my cat
  • Color
  • Evening Walk
  • 12 Step Meeting (hopefully)

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Work (I think remotely for training)
  • Read Comic books
  • Spend time with Billie, my cat
  • Color
  • Evening Walk

 Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Work (Not sure if it will be in office or remote)
  • Read Comics
  • Spend time with Billie, my cat
  • Color
  • Evening Walk
  • Vege out for the evening

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Morning Walk
  • Spend day with Billie my cat
  • Spend day reading comic books and/or coloring