Goodbye, 2019

Happy New Years Eve, World!!! This year has been a year of ups and downs. Mainly a year of ups and a great deal of growth within my mental health recovery. I owe a lot of my growth to my last therapist and my cat, Lil Gertie. Sadly, my last therapist went on paternity leave and when he comes back his job duties will be changing which means I just got a new therapist. My new therapist seems nice enough but I have only had two sessions with him.

As I mentioned, I also owe some major improvements in my recovery to my cat, Lil Gertie. She helped me a great deal. She helped me learn how to love. Lil Gertie not only helped me to love others but to love myself. I think if it wasn’t for Lil Gertie, there would have been some moments, specifically in 2018, I would have tried to take my own life. Thankfully, my love for her is what helped me. The best part of this year was bringing in the New Year with Lil Gertie. The worst part of this year was having to say goodbye to her on Thanksgiving Day evening. Having to say goodbye to your best friend is never easy. The grief of loosing a pet hurts and hurts like hell. If it wasn’t for the grief I have dealt with loosing Lil Gertie, I don’t think I would have come to the conclusion of what grief is all about. Its about realizing that you loved and loved with all your heart.

Bringing in 2020 and saying goodbye to 2019 is bittersweet. It’s bittersweet that I brought it in with my best friend, my cat, Lil Gertie, and won’t be saying goodbye to 2019 with Lil Gertie in it. However, if it wasn’t for adopting in Lil Gertie in 2018, I don’t think I would have ever even considered volunteering at an animal shelter. In fact I am now officially a volunteer where I adopted Lil Gertie at. My first official shift where I adopted Lil Gertie at is on January 7th. So, in essence I will be honoring Lil Gertie by starting off the New Year helping people and families find their perfect cat for their family.

I do not have much to say except that I am forever grateful for Lil Gertie and the hope she has given me for my future. I want to thank all of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great New Years Eve and an awesome 2020 ahead of them. Please drive safely and get home to your families in one piece. Happy New Years, World!!!

10 Days Too Long To Not Blog

Hello, World!!! It has been ten days since I last blogged. I say this like it is a big deal because it is a big deal as I am trying to create a habit of blogging on the regular basis. I want to blog on the the regular basis because I want to keep you my reader interested in continuing to read my blog. Yes, I know that sounds selfish of me but I know from following and reading other blogs that if people don’t blog on the regular basis I loose interest in the blog. I just don’t want you to loose interest in my blog due to me not blogging on the regular basis.

Last weekend I attended Emerald City Comic-Con here in Seattle. I went both Thursday (March 14th) and Saturday (March 16th). I wasn’t expecting to go at all but I was blessed with being able to go. Thursday, I attended by myself and had a grand ole time. Saturday, I attended with friends and had a blast. Both days I ended up going to a great deal of panels. I love attending the panels as I tend to learn new and interesting things. While I was there I got a few things like some Wonder Woman art work, multiple graphic novels and a handful of science fiction/fantasy books. Attending comic-con has me feeling like I belong. I feel like going to comic-con, I can be myself because it’s where people like me go. People like me tend to be geeks, nerds and loners. I did have an awkward moment when I saw my therapist at comic-con but we both knew we were attending. I didn’t go say hi to him as he appeared to be with others and even if he wasn’t with others I don’t think I would have said hi. He of course didn’t acknowledge me due to HIPPA laws and ethical reasons. We did “acknowledge” each other by a smile. A smile that didn’t mean anything but acknowledgement. Overall, I had a great time despite having a few PTSD symptoms.

I don’t have much more to say. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great rest of their Friday. Fridays are great. Again, thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Update On 2019 Goals

Good Afternoon, World!!! I hope everyone is having a good Thursday so far. I have been thinking a great deal about my 2019 goals especially since the major goal I had for this year has already been completed and it only the last day of January. That goal was to get my dental work done and the only thing that is left is going into seeing the denurist once a moth for six to twelve months for some adjustments to my dentures. Yes, I still of some things left to do regarding my teeth but the major part of it has been accomplished. So, since I have accomplished my major goal for the year, I need to focus on my other goals. I discussed this with my therapist when I saw him this past Tuesday and he suggested that the goal I could put most of my focus on without forgetting about the other goals is completing at least one of my workbooks.

I agreed with the workbook idea. I informed him that I don’t know what workbook to work on as some of them I have already started and haven’t even finished the second chapter. He asked if I ever bought the workbook “The Artist’s Way” and I informed him I did. He suggested I do “The Artist Way” workbook as it will pull out my creative side and be challenging in a good way. He suggest this workbook several months ago as he thought it would be good for me to do and he wouldn’t be recommending the workbook to me if he didn’t complete it himself. To me that is what I like to hear when someone suggest a workbook that they have completed it. When he brought up again in our session this past Tuesday, I informed him that it was a good idea that I do this particular workbook especially since it will involve art and journaling. Both of which is quite helpful to me and my recovery. So I am looking forward to what this workbook has to bring especially since it involves both art and journaling. So, focusing on this workbook is going to be the next major goal I focus on to accomplish for 2019 and I will not neglect my other smaller goals as I have set time aside for all of my goals.

I don’t have much more to say and hope to continue to update you on my 2019 goals as I continue to accomplish them. Have a great day. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Random Post

Good Afternoon, World!!! I hope everyone is having a good Saturday!!! Right now I am in some pain due to having all my teeth pulled out on Wednesday morning. The only thing they gave me for pain is ibuprofen. It sucks that all they gave me for pain is ibuprofen however I understand due to the opioid epidemic here in the United States. I am hoping that the pain subsides sooner than later because I want to be able to eat solid food again. All I am eating is liquids and some soft food like scrambled eggs and cream of wheat.

I have been spending the last few days with my grandpa due to the oral surgery. He was worried how I would be taking the pain. Not only that, when I get sick or something, my mental health symptoms start to increase so I am thinking that my grandpa wanted to make sure that the oral surgery didn’t increase my mental health symptoms. Yes, my depression and PTSD has slightly increased but I think being around my grandpa has helped a great deal and the fact that my therapist and I discussed on ways to be preventive about my mental health symptoms.

I have been reading a great deal since I got my oral surgery. I am about half way done with the book I am currently reading and that is a major deal since I just had all my teeth pulled and dealing with pain isn’t helpful to one’s concentration. I am also happy that I am half way done with the book as it make me that much closer to accomplishing another one of my 2019 goals. That goal is to read six books this year. I would have a higher number but since I really didn’t accomplish reading any books last year due to my mental health, I decided to make it a realistic goal.

Speaking of goals, the one 2019 goal I already completed was getting my dental work done. Yes, I am in pain from the oral surgery and the dentures aren’t helping much in that department, it is a goal I have completed and can check off my list. In fact it is a major goal that has been accomplished for this year. I am so glad it is done and of the way or at least the major part of it is. I will still need to go in for follow ups regarding the dentures but that is the easy part of the goal.

Since it is nearly one thirty in the afternoon in my neck of the woods, I am thinking I need to get dressed for the day. I am also hoping my grandpa can take me shopping at Walmart so I can use my gift card I received for Christmas. I am not a big fan of Walmart but I am not going to waste someone’s money due to the fact I am not a fan of the place.

With that all being said, I really think I should end this post. I hope everyone has a great Saturday and weekend ahead. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Again, I hope everyone has an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Welcome To 2019

Happy New Years, World!!! It is hard to believe that it is 2019 in most of the world including my neck of the woods. I spent the New Years looking out my window toward the Space Needle as fireworks shot off of it. I don’t live near the Space Needle but I am still able to see it from my apartment. My cat didn’t freak out as much as she did when the Fourth of July fireworks went off over Lake Union and no I don’t live near Lake Union either but can still see it from my apartment. Anyway, I brought in the New Year with Lil Gertie and am grateful that I was able to bring it in with her.

Since I am talking about my cat, Lil Gertie, I can’t help but wonder where she was and what she was doing last year at this time. I try not to think about it very much but I hope she was happy and safe. I just hope that she is happy living with as this year starts. I know I am happy to have her.

It is hard to believe that last year at this time, I had absolutely NO hope at all. Having no hope left me extremely suicidal to where I ended up in the psych ward on the second day of the year. Now, I can say that this year I have no hope and that I won’t end up in the psych ward on the second day of the New Year. So, this year as started so much better than last year. I am so grateful that I am so much more hopeful this year than I was last year.

So, I as I sit here blogging, I am drinking some sparking apple cider thinking about the triumphs and trials of last year and what this year is going to bring. I know that when Valentines Day comes around this year that it will be difficult as it will mark the one year anniversary of my grandma’s passing away. Yes, it will be hard but I know that a few weeks later I will be celebrating my 40th birthday. Something I didn’t think will happen because I thought that I would have died by suicide. But thankfully, I am going to make it to my 40th birthday. So yes, I know I will have tough moments but I will also have some awesome moments as well.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I just want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. You are all awesome. I hope all  of you continue to read my blog well into the New Year. Again, thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone has has an awesome New Year and that 2019 brings you some joy as well as some hope. I also hope this you brings you what you want and what you need. Happy New Years, World!!!

Randomness of 2018

Good Morning, World!!! It is hard to believe that last year at this time I was wish 2017 to go to hell and had absolutely no hope coming into 2018. This year I am not wish the year to go to hell even though it was difficult and I have hope going into 2019. As bad as 2017 going into this year (2018) was, I am grateful that 2018 going into 2019 is on a more positive note and that I have had a great deal of growth this year.

Growth that I really wasn’t expecting but wanting so badly. Growth that has helped given me a sense of hope and purpose. Purpose that has once again given me the reason to continue to live. And having a reason to live is what helps a persons recovery with a mental health challenge. I am beyond grateful for my growth in 2018.

2018 may have not begun well for me but I am grateful for it ending on a better note than it started. In fact it didn’t start well for many people and sadly is not ending very well for people. Granted 2018 isn’t ending as well for as other years but it is ending better than it started and that is all one can ask for.

I am really not sure how I will bring in 2019 but most likely will be spending it at home with my cat or with neighbors. Neighbors that have been there for me this year. Through the good, the bad and the (very) ugly. People who helped make 2018 end on a better note.

I don’t have much more to post about as it appears to me that I am rambling on about a bunch of randomness. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you for reading my blog. I also want to wish you all a Happy New Years. I hope 2019 is a good year for all of you. Peace Out, World!!!

Thinking About New Years Goals

Good Evening, World!!! It is the last Friday of the year and it is hard to believe that 2018 is pretty much over especially since it has been a pretty tough year for me. Yes, things have improved a great deal for me this year however I am grateful beyond my wildest dreams that it is ending better than it started. Anyway, since it is that time of year where many people start thinking about New Years resolutions, I start thinking about New Years goals. Yes, I realize they are the same thing however I tend to accomplish my goals and not the resolutions. Not sure why but I think it is all about the wording and people expect you to not follow through with resolutions but people do expect to follow through with goals.

As I think about what I want to accomplish during 2019 or at least start to accomplish, I am having a tough time figuring out what I want my goals to be. I want and need them to realistic. I know I want to accomplish goals in regards to both my physical and mental health. I also want to accomplish getting a job with a more consistent schedule, preferably in the social services field but at this moment in time I might be happy with going back to working at a grocery store even if that isn’t really what I want to do. One thing I do know what I want to do is put in an effort of doing meditation and/or mindfulness on the daily basis again. Anyway, goals are ever changing and can be tweaked from time to time.

I don’t think I have much more to say except that I will be thinking a great deal about my goals for 2019. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope that everyone has a great rest of your Friday. I also hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!