Just a Bullshit of Randomness

Good Evening, World!!! It is the Sunday after Thanksgiving and this year Thanksgiving was difficult for my family and I as it is the first holiday season with out my grandma. When my grandpa said the prayer before we ate dinner on Thanksgiving he broke down crying which led me to cry.

Speaking of grandpa, he had knee surgery a few weeks ago and right now, I am taking care of him as neither one of my uncles are able to do so at the moment due to them both having to work. It is nice to be able to help him as needed. It is also nice to spend some time with him in general as he is 88 years old. For being 88 years old he is relatively good health with the exception of his recent knee surgery.

Speaking of health, I did see my doctor nearly two weeks ago. She put me on on some antibiotics due to having an abscessed tooth. Unfortunately, I needed to go to the Emergency Room the next day to get my tooth taken out. Good thing the hospital I normally go to is a teaching hospital with a dental school. I see my doctor again this Tuesday as we have appointments every two weeks to help keep me out of the hospital for both physical and mental health.

Speaking of mental health I finally saw my psychiatric nurse practitioner as she kept cancelling due to family emergencies and a death in the family. She apologized profusely about the many cancellations however I was quite understanding of the reasons why. She and I discussed my mental health as well as my psych meds. I informed her overall my meds were working except the new sleeping med which she increased. We also discussed not being able to see my therapist due to him being out sick for three weeks. She informed me that if he wasn’t back the week after Thanksgiving to give her a call to see what she could do about me seeing someone on the interim bases.

Thankfully, I didn’t need to call my psychiatric nurse practitioner regarding as my therapist came back last week, the week of Thanksgiving. I was able to see my therapist the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. We discussed a great deal regarding him being gone, my grief regarding it being the first holidays without my grandma and the upcoming holidays and how difficult they are for me due to trauma. Since my therapist is back even though part time we are working on ways to help me get through them. So my next session we are going specifically working on self care tactics so I can stay out of the hospital for psych reasons including the Emergency Room.

As the holidays are upon us, I am thinking on what I am going to give my family for the holidays. I haven’t decided yet but I think I am going to give my dads side a picture of my grandma and my moms side some hand made gifts. I highly dislike giving things that will only be exchanged for something else or gifted out to someone else.

I don’t have much else to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that I have people who read my blog on the regular basis. To you I am the most grateful for. I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season even though I know it is challenging for many folks. I hope you all have a wonderful work week as well. Have good rest of your evening. Peace Out, World!!!

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The Evening Before Thanksgiving

Good Evening, World!!! Long time not blog. I can give you plenty of reasons why I haven’t posted in a while as well as plenty of excuses and have decided I won’t bore you with them. I’ll just go straight into what I am going to post about.

The last few weeks have been filled with anxiety. They have been filled with anxiety because my therapist was out of the office for three weeks due to health problems and finally came back this past Monday (11/19/2018). He still still didn’t look like he was feeling all that well when I saw him yesterday (Tuesday). But at least I was able to see him for a session without seeing him in almost a month. I had an extreme case of anxiety that my therapist wouldn’t becoming back due to health reason after what happened with Diana. Even though my therapist is back only part time due to his health issues, I am glad he is feeling well enough to be back. I just wish he was feeling back to his normal. But at least I will be seeing him weekly just as long as his doctors continue to say it is okay for him to work.

Another thing that has been causing me a great deal of stress for me is that my psychiatric nurse practitioner kept canceling on me due to a family emergency and a death in the family and I had ran out of refills for meds. But thankfully she refilled them before leaving to go to the funeral. I was finally able to see her last Thursday (November 15, 2018). She upped my new sleeping med and even with the increased, it still isn’t helping me fall asleep as quickly as I would like. At least the Melatonin appears to be helping me stay asleep.

Something else that I am not sure I have  mentioned but my regular doctor has been seeing me every two weeks as a precautionary thing to help me stay out of the Emergency Room (E.R) for both physical and mental health reasons. It appears to be helping. In my opinion it has been quite helpful.

Unfortunately, I did end up in the E.R last Wednesday (11/14/2018) due to an abscessed tooth. Thankfully, they were able to get the Dental Resident over from the Dental school to take care of the tooth and pull it. I am now on antibiotics for three weeks due to the severity of the infection.

On that note, I have been dealing with anxiety regarding the upcoming holidays. It is not just the anxiety I am dealing with in regards to the holidays, I have been dealing with the grief of this being the first holiday season without my grandma. I just wish the anxiety wasn’t so bad especially with the added grief. The one thing that has been quite helpful with the anxiety is my cat. She has been laying on my chest as I sit in my chair when I am high anxiety. She does this to help me focus on my breath. I find it quite helpful that she does this even though it hurts my boobs.

Well, I don’t have much more to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope that I can post more often and not let things get in the way. Again, thank you so very much for reading my post. If I don’t post tomorrow, I want to wish everyone in the United States a very Happy Thanksgiving. Peace Out, World!!!

A Roller-coaster of A Day

Good Evening, World!!! Today has been roller-coaster  type of day when it comes to my emotions. I was able to meet my spend down for medicaid due to a comprehensive  dental examination. That means I officially have medicaid back on. Which will help with my dental, mental and physical health care. I also happy that I will be able to get the proper care I need to take care of myself.

On a side note I went to call my grandma on her cell phone to tell her some good news. The sad part of this is I had a lapse in judgement that she passed away just over six months ago which let the flood gates of grief come rushing in. I miss my grandma so much. A plus note, I did have lunch with my grandpa.

I talked on the phone with my therapist about my grief dealing with my grandma and he gave me the support I needed. He suggested that I journal and/or blog about the grief. Dealing with grief is not easy.

On to the positive note. I have an interview on August 31st for a Peer Specialist position. I am looking forward to having an interview and hopefully a job a peer. I should here back later on this week about getting an interview for a shelter counselor position. Not sure what position I would want more put at least I will have some job prospects coming my way.

I am also happy that I will be able to get the much needed dental care I so desperately need. Getting the proper dental care helps your overall health. Having good health will help me with being able to go back to work.

As you can tell I’ve had an emotional roller-coaster type of day. Please send out positive energy or vibes or prayers or whatever good mojo my way about getting the job that is best suited for me.

Thank you for reading. It is greatly appreciative to have readers like you in my life. I hope that my post as of lately gives out some hope to people because some of my post appear a little hopeless and depressing when I read back on them. It means a great deal that I have extremely awesome readers like you to help me keep blogging. If it weren’t for you the reader, I wouldn’t still be blogging. Thank you again for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been A Long Day

Good Evening, World!!! As many of you know I have had a long day. It didn’t really turn out as planned but that is okay for me. It started when I saw my doctor this morning to look at my weird ass mouth infection. She gave me some more antibiotics.  We also discussed how long I have been seeing her and her concern that I could be over using the hospital’s which is valid. So I’ll be seeing her every two weeks just for checks about physical health stuff and if needed mental health stuff as well. Which I am okay with.

I then saw my trusty therapist who is trying his best to gain my trust and it is slightly working. We discussed ways on how I can change certain behaviors and how he can help me with that. He now wants to see me twice a week to help me with my behaviors and help me not use the Emergency Rooms as much for both physical and mental health reasons.

Plans changed when my grandpa picked me up to go to Red Robin. We decided that he would take me to a walk in dental clinic and get a comprehensive dental check up. He paid for it. Looks like that I will need to get all my teeth pulled and get a full set of dentures which is not surprising for me. So next week, I am going to the DSHS office to get some paper work straightened out as it appears I am loosing some things due to a computer and/or human error. So hopefully, I’ll be able to get back on medicaid so I can get my teeth fixed.

My grandpa and I did go out to eat to IHOP but it surely was no Red Robin. Hopefully, we can go to Red Robin soon. I love Red Robin. I think we might go to Red Robin on Sunday.

As far as getting an interview with a potential employer, I am still waiting to hear back. I think it is ridiculous that they haven’t even set one up with me yet when I informed them that the time they gave me I was unable to do so due other obligations. I gave them dates and times when I was available next week and the person said they would get back to me by the end of Friday which is today.

Thank you again for reading my blog as I ramble on about different shit. Have a good rest of your Friday and I hope you enjoy your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Nothing Much To Say

Hello, World!!! I sit here wondering if I should have kept my appointments with my vocational (employment) specialist and therapist. I have a feeling that I am going to regret cancelling however the mouth infection I have is making it difficult to talk due to the pain of the infection. You would think that the doctors at the hospital would admit me to the hospital for I.V antibiotics but they say it’s not “severe enough” which maybe I need to be grateful for. Another thing I am grateful for despite poor dental hygiene is that the infection has nothing to do with my dental health. I do see my regular doctor on Friday for this stupid infection that fucking won’t go away.

On a side note I have been playing email tag with a potential employer about setting up an interview for sometime next week. It would only be one to two shifts a week which would equal twelve to twenty four hours a week. The shifts are twelve hours due to it being an overnight shelter for homeless young adults.  Working with people who are currently and/or formally homeless is a passion of mine and really hope that I get this job. Yes, I know that the interview hasn’t been set up yet but at least that is in the works. Dealing with homeless individuals for me is easy because all they want are the basics in life.

Thank you for reading. It is very much appreciated from my end. Have a wonderful Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!

 

A Not So Good Sunday

Good Evening, World!!! It hasn’t been a very good Sunday for me. I ended up in two Emergency Rooms at two different hospitals. One which told me it I had a bad tooth and needed to get a dentist. The other hospital said I had a mouth and facial infection with a possible tooth infection. So I am now on antibiotics for a the mouth and facial infection along with taking ibuprofen for the pain. I was suggested by the second hospital to get a dentist whom gave me referrals to.

On a plus note I was able to do some art work as well as post this blog. On a bigger plus note I am able to be home with my cat, Lil Gertie and able to play with her. She is such a sweet cat.

Thank you for reading. I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. Peace Out, World.

Who The Hell Knows Where This Post Is Going To Say?

Good Afternoon, World!!! Yes, I know this is like my third post for the day in just a few hours but I have a lot on my mind. Plus I am wanting to start blogging more often. Blogging about my journey appears to help others and even helps me with my own mental health challenges.

One of the things I want to bring up which I have discussed before and is sort of a random though is the the advertisements I have to earn some extra cash to help pay for some desired things I would like have such as art supplies. I just hope that those who do get the advertisements click on to them for me as that’s how I make the money. You don’t have to purchase anything from the sights. You just need to click on it and let it load from my understanding. I know it’s asking a lot from you my reader to do that and I hope you know it helps me with my hobbies like my art work and blogging and other such things.

As I blog, I hope to blog about different things in my post to add different tags in hopes to bring my readership. I know the might seem a little weird or odd but anyway I can get folks to read my blog then maybe I can help just one more person get the hope they need to be in recovery with their mental health challenges, no matter what their recovery looks like for them. Giving others hope is what I desire the most about the blog.

If you read my blog on the regular basis even the semi regular basis you know that I love to do art. Primarily painting and coloring with some occasional collaging. I am hoping that I can share my art work with you all on my blog as soon as I get my camera fixed.

Something I am going to have to do this next week is get some medical care for a possible kidney and bladder infections. Something I don’t want have to deal with but will have to do so. Another thing I have to get checked out is my teeth. I need to get some major dental care done. Getting both medical and dental health care done also helps with mental health.

Something that has been helping me a great deal with my mental health recovery is my emotional support animal, my cat, Lil Gertie. She has been a great help to me with my recovery.  Knowing when I need to be tended to emotionally. Lil Gertie knows when to get my attention when I am in a bad spot which is good thing. Too bad I can’t take her into places lie grocery stores.

I think I am going to get going now. I am wanting to go read and have lunch. I know what book I am going to read as it’s one I have already started and want to finish. Now trying to figure out want I am going to have for lunch. I hope everyone has a good weekend. Don’t blink or the weekend will disappear. Have an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!