Tag Archives: Mental Illness

2020 Hindsight (A New Year’s Eve Post)

Posted on by Gertie

Happy New Year’s, World!!! It is still 2020 here in Seattle, Washington. 2020 has been a challenging year for the entire world. It has been challenging due to the stupid pandemic known as Covid-19. Sadly, many people lost their life due to Covid-19 and hope you my reader will take a moment to remember those who lost their lives. As we honor those who lost their lives, those of us still here have been in quarantine for most of the year or least some form of quarantine.

Seattle along with the rest of Washington (State) has been in quarantine for most of the year because Seattle was where the first cases of Covid-19 happened in the United States. You would have thought with being in quarantine for most of the year with most of Washington, I would have achieved most if not all of my goals but sadly I didn’t. On the positive note, I did accomplish my four top goals. The goals I accomplished was paying off my credit cards, starting to volunteer at PAWS Cat City, getting a new job and adopting my cat, Billie Dean. My cat, Billie did help me through the quarantine a great deal. On the note of goals, I will have some of the same ones as I want to accomplish the goals I did not accomplish. I do have new goals to accomplish as well.

As I look back on 2020, it was overall a better year for me than last year (2019) even through the pandemic. I think the year could have been much worse for me with the pandemic but I am very happy it was not and I learned a great deal about myself. I also think the year could have been better if it wasn’t for the pandemic but I am looking at the positive side of it all or at least trying to do so.

I don’t have anything more to say and this will be my last post of 2020 and I will see you all next year even though it is next year for most of the world already. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great New Year. I also hope Covid-19 goes away in 2021. Happy New Years and Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Arrive home from my last shift of the homeless shelter I work at.
  • Spend time with my cat, Billie Dean
  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Take a nap.
  • Do laundry.

Monday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Take my cat Billie to the vet to get his vaccines.
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Therapy
  • Clean apartment.
  • Get meds.

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Start new job.

Thursday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Work.

Friday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Work.

Saturday

  • Mindfulness and Meditation.
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Chill out.

Billie the Cat Wasn’t Amused

Posted on by Gertie
  • “Okay, if you have to. Only this one picture, Mom.”
  • “Mom, you have had enough amusement with this thing. Time to take it off.”

Happy Holidays, World!!! This is my cat, Billie Dean. Also known as Billie the Cat. The above pictures are of my cat, Billie who has some reindeer antlers on. For those who are visually impaired, may not be able to see Billie’s facial expression and just wanted to tell you that his face clearly states that he is not amused. I did put captions with what I thought he was thinking. I love my cat so much. Anyway, I thought I would share the pictures to help spread the holiday cheers.

Before ending this post, I want to wish you all a happy holiday season. I also want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Happy Holidays and Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am awake sort of by choice due to needing to sleep during the day to work my last shift at my current employer. See, I work a thirteen hour night shift at my current employer. So, that is why I said, “sort of by choice” regarding sleep. I will miss the folks I work with as well as the clients I serve but I am glad to be leaving because night shifts suck especially such long shift and already having sleep issues.

So far the thing that has helped me stay up tonight was doing some art work. Specifically, coloring. I am coloring. I am coloring some holiday pictures. I love coloring and enjoy being able to color holiday pages. The one I am working on currently is a Hanukkah coloring page. In fact it is currently Hanukkah as we speak. Tonight will be the third night. The Hanukkah page I am coloring is for a friend of mine who celebrates Hanukkah. It is almost finished and I will be able to give it to her on Monday night.

As, I have been coloring I have been listening to a podcast. The podcast is about philosophy. The philosophy podcast I am listening to is “Philosophize This.” I really enjoy this particular podcast for various reasons. One of which is Steven West does a great job relating the topic of philosophy to his listening. The cool thing is that Steven West lives in the Seattle area.

Of course, Billie Dean, my cat has been quite helpful with keeping me awake so I can sleep during the day. I love Billie so very much. He has helped me so much this past year. I love the fact that Billie is so lovey dovey and very much a lovebug that loves to sleep in my lap. Billie, is such a sweet little kitty.

I do not have much more to write about. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a wonderful Saturday world. Peace Out, World!!!

A Season of Change

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Holidays, World!!! It has been six weeks since my last blog. I do not have an excuse to why have not blogged in the last month and a half. It was just pure laziness. It is my hope that I will start doing what I did on several different occasions. In fact I hope to restart my plans for blogging this Sunday, December 13th. I plan on starting my “Weekly Plans” post this Sunday. Starting, Saturday, December 19th, I plan on doing my “Weekly Check-In” post. Part of the reason why I stopped these post was because of my current job schedule but thankfully, I will be able to start them back up.

The reason why I will be able to start them back up is because tomorrow (Saturday) night will my last shift at my current employer. I put in my notice because, I will be starting a new job on Wednesday, December 16th as a Peer Specialist. It is a fulltime office job. It Monday through Friday during typical office hours. I am having some pretty high anxiety with starting a new job especially since it is fulltime. I know I will do okay with it but I am still anxious as hell.

Another reason why I am so nervous is because of my cat, Billie Dean. Billie is use to me being gone for work once a week for about fourteen hours as well as a once week volunteer shift for about four hours. Now, Billie will deal with me being gone for about ten hours a day for five days a week. Plus, one day week I will gone for about four hours due to volunteering. Billie is a real lovey dovey type of cat that wants his person home as much as possible so I worry about possible separation anxiety on his part. On a plus note, I will be able to work from home about half the time so I am sure this will help Billie the Cat get adjusted to my new work schedule. I love my cat so much and don’t want to put him in any type of stress.

I don’t have much more to say. I do want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Have a great evening world. Peace Out, World!!!

A Podcast Type of Night

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It is the middle of the night in my corner of the world. I am not exactly tired enough to even try to go to bed and sleep. I say this because if I went to bed now, I wouldn’t be able to sleep and sadly, would be tossing and turning. So, instead of trying to go to sleep when I know I won’t be able to, I am blogging as I listen to a podcast about philosophy. The philosophy podcast I am listening to is “Philosophize This.”

“Philosophize This” is one of my favorite podcast. It is the first podcast, I started listening to. In fact, I am trying to catch up to present day episodes. I am really enjoying this podcast as I am learning a great deal about philosophy. I highly recommend listening to “Philosophize This” especially if you enjoy learning from someone who appears to be down to earth just by listening.

Of course as I listen to the podcast, my cat, Billie Dean, is laying right next to me. Billie is an extremely sweet cat. He loves to lay on my lap and is very much a cuddly lap cat. I love him so very much.

I do not have much more to say at the moment. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end that you took the time out of your day to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Goodnight and don’t the let the bed bugs bite. Peace Out, World!!!

Yet, Another Post About my Depression

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! It is two days shy of a month since I last blogged. I do not have an excuse of why I haven’t blogged in nearly a month. Or at least an excuse that I feel okay with because there isn’t an excuse good enough for why I haven’t blogged.

Right now my depression is acting up. I am wondering if the increased depression is due to the time of year or due to Covid-19 or due to the up coming elections here in the United States or all of the above. No matter the reason the why I am dealing with increased depression symptoms at least I am aware of it and that it is currently a mild case for me. I know I shouldn’t be dismissive of my depression symptoms as being “mild,” its just that they could be much, much worse.

As far as trying to make myself feel better, spending time with my cat, Billie Dean is quite helpful. Billie is very much a cuddly cat and loves to spend as much time as he can on my lap. I love Billie so much and am grateful for his unconditional love. The love of an animal is the best feeling in the world.

Another way, I am going to do to help with the depression is to read. I most likely will read the fantasy/science fiction book that I am currently reading. Reading helps me cope with my reality. It helps me forget my reality for an hour or two at time without doing harm to myself.

I do not have much more to say as I want to go read. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. I am greatly appreciative that you have chosen to read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is almost one o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world of Seattle. I am unable to sleep due to insomnia and it fucking sucks. As much as having insomnia suck, there is a plus side to it at times and tonight is one of those times.

Tonight is one of those times because I get to catch up on a couple of things as my cat, Billie Dean, lays in my lap. Billie is happy as a clam when he is able to be in my lap. Or at least it appears that way to me. I love my cat, Billie so very much.

As Billie, happily lays in my lap I have been catching up on my reading. Specifically, I have been reading Star Wars, Heir to the Empire by Timothy Zahn. Tonight I have read the first five chapters and am about to start chapter six. Actually, I am debating if I should start chapter six tonight as I am really getting into the book. When I get into a book, I tend to read as much as I can before getting too exhausted to where I am not able to function and really need to get some sleep. Not only to I not sleep, I forget to eat when I am really into a book.

Since I am really, getting into Star Wars, Heir to the Empire and am needing to stop reading for the night, I am going to listen to a podcast. A podcast about philosophy. Specifically, I will be listening to Philosophize This as I want to be able to get caught up to present day episode. I really like how Stephen West presents the topic of philosophy which is part of the reason why I really like the podcast. I am learning stuff I wish they would have taught in high school especially since I have not had the luxury to attend college.

Now that you know what I have done tonight and what I am going to do next, I am going to end this particular blog post for now. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I really hope everyone is having a good nights sleep and hope you have a great Tuesday ahead when you wake up. Peace Out, World!!!

Yucky Weather Fits My Mood

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I am dealing with increased depression symptoms. I am not a big fan of my symptoms increasing but at least the weather reflects my current mood of depressed. Depression sucks no matter the time of year but it feels easier to deal with when the weather is yucky outside.

Having depression sucks shit but at least I trying to do something to improve it even in the slightest. One of the things I am doing is cuddling up in my new Wonder Woman fleece blanket that I ordered on Amazon. It came yesterday (Wednesday) which was a day early. I am so grateful that it came early as it has been quite helpful with soothing me.

Something else that has been helpful is my cat, Billie Dean. Billie has been cuddling with me and my new Wonder Woman blanket. At this point in time, it is hard to figure out who likes the blanket more, me or Billie. I am beyond grateful that Billie knows when I need some extra cuddles. I love Billie so much and am glad he is in my life.

Another thing that I have been doing to help combat my depression and the gloominess is reading. I am currently reading a fantasy book that a friend suggested I read. I am enjoying the book so far. I enjoy reading fantasy and science fiction genre books. It helps me get out of my own head.

I think I will get going and end this particular blog post so I can get back to reading. I would like to thank all of you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my perspective that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great night. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Take nap due to working all night
  • Spend time with my cat Billie Dean
  • Listen to a podcast
  • Walk in the rain

Monday

  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Walk in the rain
  • Listen to a podcast
  • Spend a half an hour cleaning apartment

Tuesday

  • Attend therapy appointment over Zoom
  • Go to see my doctor in person at her office
  • Listen to a podcast

Wednesday

  • Listen to a podcast
  • Go to Target or Walmart to buy new sheets for my bed
  • Attend a Zoom meeting

Thursday

  • Listen to a podcast
  • Attend a Zoom meeting
  • Spend a half an hour cleaning apartment

Friday

  • Listen to a podcast
  • Attend a Zoom meeting
  • Buy cat litter for my cat Billie Dean
  • Stay up all night to sleep all day Saturday (Watch movies and read)

Saturday

  • Sleep all day
  • Work all night