Friday Night At Home In My PJ’s

Happy Friday Evening, World!!! I have been home for a few hours and have decided to spend my Friday evening in my pajama’s spending time with my cat, Lil Gertie. I spent the night at my grandpa’s last night. I got to my grandpa’s yesterday afternoon and didn’t get back home till this afternoon and it feels great to be home. In fact, it is nice to spend time by myself with my cat. My cat has pretty much been sitting on my lap most of the evening which is very relaxing for me.

I have pretty much done absolutely nothing productive. I have taken a shower and clean the kitty litter box but that is as productive as I am getting this evening. I have been listening to Christmas music as I read comic books. I am reading A Superhero’s Christmas volumes one and two. It is a holiday ritual that I do every year even when I am severely depressed as it is one thing I know I can do as a personal tradition. A tradition I have been doing for about eight years now. I read these two comic books multiple times during the holiday season.  The superhero’s are all DC superhero’s in the comic books.

I thing my Friday evening has been quite relaxing. I have a cat on my lap while listening to Christmas music and reading a Superhero’s Christmas volumes one and two from DC comics. How much more relaxing can a night be? I think I might even watch a Christmas movie but not sure yet.

I don’t have much else to say in this post. I hope you all have a relaxing Friday as well as relaxing weekend. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is very much appreciated from my end. Peace Out, World!!!


Everyday Inspiration; Day 2: Write a List


Things I’ve Learned…

  • To play the flute
  • Recovery is non-linear
  • To laugh at myself when life gets tough
  • Books are usually better than the movie
  • Some movies based a superhero’s suck shit
  • Recovery is difficult but sure in the hell a lot more fun
  • Music soothes the soul
  • Reading is a lot more fun that television
  • Going for walks reduces anxiety for me
  • I’m stronger than I think I am

Full Moon Friday The 13th 2014

     Happy Full Moon Friday the 13th!! A full moon landing on Friday the 13th is a pretty uncommon but cool occurrence. The next time a full moon will on Friday the 13th will Friday, August 13, 2049. That’s 35 years away.

     Well, as some of you may be aware with reading my blog I work Fridays. Fridays are my Mondays. I didn’t have a good day at work. I had a co-worker tell me today, “you’re a nobody,” when I was taking a break. My eyes filled with tears and I said, “you’re right I am a nobody.” The look on his face was an oh shit what did I say look. The tears in my eyes were real and what he said to me triggered me greatly. It not only triggered my PTSD but some of the old tapes in my head. After splashing some water on my face I apologized to him for allowing him to get to me and that I would never tell anybody that they are a nobody. My break finished and I went back to work. Apparently he told on himself and told his department manager who told the store manager. So the four of us had a meeting. My co-worker apologized and I accepted it. The store manager asked why I didn’t notify him on what my co-worker said to me. I told the store manager that I didn’t report it to him because I didn’t think it was warranted. My co-worker looked and me and said, “It takes a lot for you to cry and if someone says something that makes you tear up then you should report it. That’s why I tattled on myself because I made you tear up.” I am just grateful that we got it taken care of. I shunned it off as it being Friday the 13th and a full moon.

     When I got home from work I realized that I felt like cutting myself due to being triggered so I took a nice like shower. After the shower I then finished up a cross-stitch project that I was doing. After I was done with the cross-stitch I put it away because I want to frame it and give it to my grandparents. (Side note: My grandparents helped raised me.) So when I put up my finished cross-stitching project for my grandparents I read a Wonder Woman comic book.

     I read the Wonder Woman comic because somehow it gives me a source of strength. I’m not sure why reading Wonder Woman gives me a source of strength but it does. She is the ultimate superhero. For the longest time she was the only female superhero. I wish that she wasn’t the only superhero girls had in the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s and even part of the 80’s but am grateful that she was there for us “girls” now women. I thank the feminist movement for making sure she stayed around.

     After I finished my Wonder Woman comic book I picked up the book, The Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens. I read the first 11 pages and realized that I was hungry. I fixed me some left overs and ate. After eating I read another 10 or so pages when I decided blog this particular entry. So far I am enjoying The Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens.

    Just so you all know that because I used the skills I learned I did NOT self harm. I think I was triggered to cut because of what was said to me at work earlier today. I am grateful that I used my skills to help me through the urges to self harm. My recovery means the world to me. Now what to do after I am done with this particular blog entry.

    Since I am planning on ending this particular blog entry I am think I am going to look for jobs in the peer support specialist/peer counseling because I am not working in a grocery store has never been my career path. I never thought I would still be working at a grocery store for nine years. So part of my plans for the rest of the evening is to look to see if there are any positions for peer support specialist/peer counseling. I know I am meant to be a peer counselor.

    Well, now that I bored you with my day I am going to end this blog entry. Have a great Full Moon Friday The 13th. Peace out and have out their in the world.

Therapy, Recovery, and Wonder Woman

     Hey! It’s Thursday and that means its the day I go see my therapist and I did. In fact I will start seeing her on Mondays again this Monday after I get off work. I have been seeing my therapist for 5 1/2 years now at a local community mental health clinic. Diana, my therapist has been the longest clinician I’ve had and that has helped a great deal in my recovery process. I’m grateful that she has not given up on me or my recovery process. In fact, Diana was the one who told me the summer of 2013 that I no longer meet the criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). She officially took it off my chart. It took a lot of work to get it off my chart with her help. Of course I’ve had clinicians in the past who have helped a great deal with me with my recovery process.

     Diana, of course is not my therapist real name. I’ve given her a pseudonym for her privacy as well as the privacy of her past, current and future clients. I did ask if it was okay if I could give her a pseudonym for my blog and said yes. In fact we came up with pseudonym together. We chose the name Diana of Diana Prince because I am a huge Wonder Woman fan. Diana Prince is Wonder Woman’s human name. It was the name we both agreed on. I liked it because Diana (Wonder Woman) is a woman of strength and I see my therapist as a woman of strength. I would tell you why she liked it but I am not sure if I would have her permission to do so and most importantly I want to protect her privacy and her other clients.

     Speaking of Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) I finally got the last five issues. I finally had the money to buy them. I am so behind on my reading and collection of Wonder Woman. I have to figure out the other issue I need to buy. Reading and collecting Wonder Woman comic books has helped me a great deal with my recovery process. It’s one of my many Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) skills that I use on the daily basis.

     Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) is an entire blog entry in itself. I do have to say if it wasn’t for DBT I would not be currently employed nor would I be a recovered Borderline. DBT has given me the skills I need to live a life worth living. DBT has been a major part of my recovery and will continue to be part of my recovery. I hope to explain more about DBT later. I need get going to use my DBT Skills by fixing me and my boyfriend something to eat.

     I guess I will end this blog entry for now and hope to do another blog entry tomorrow. Until then go out and have fun in this world of ours. Peace out and have fun.