Frustrated w/Noisy & Aggressive Neighbors

Hello, World!!!! I’m frustrated with my neighbors. Actually, I am furious with one particular neighbor who started some shit with another neighbor for no reason. I finally got to bed and sleep at a decent time when I got woken up by a neighbor screaming for help. A disabled neighbor started beating my other neighbor with a crutch for no reason at all. When I heard the screaming I opened my door and looked into the hallway and witnessed what was going on. When I noticed my neighbor being hit by another neighbor and their crutch, I called 911 and I was not the only one who did. My neighbor who was injured went to the hospital. The other neighbor doing the violence got arrested and screamed the entire time.

On that note I’m not sure if I can go back to sleep at the moment. I just don’t know which neighbors to trust now but at least I know which neighbors are my friends. The neighbor who got attacked is a friend. The neighbor who did the attack will no longer be trustworthy and will no longer be a friend of mine.

Since I’m not sure if I’m going to go back to sleep anytime soon, I will seek comfort from my cat, Billie. Billie is really great at comforting me in hard moments. I’m so happy to have a pet to comfort me and keep me company.

Since I am not sure if I will be able to go to sleep right away, I will be applying for jobs. Even jobs I may not want but I need the money to help pay for bills. I’m running low on money. But that’s enough about this topic.

I’m thinking I might do something creative. Not sure if I will color, latch hook or cross stitch. All three get me relaxed. I most likely will either color a cross stitch.

I don’t have much more to say but thank you for reading my post. Peace Out and Good Night, World!!!

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Intro to Poetry; Day 2: Face

Today’s poem is about “faces” and I know the picture is of a skull but it has a face. I wanted to challenge myself with today’s poem. I name him Mr. Skull Face. I hope to keep you update on him one I start on him. The poem of him is below.

Mr. Skull Face

by Gertie

Mr. Skull Face is a cross stitch

that yet has to be started.

Once started and finished,

Mr. Skull Face will be a piece of work

and a piece of beauty.

Loving My Coping Skills Box

Good Evening, World!!! I am sitting here at my laptop slightly depressed. I can’t blame the weather on my depression today as it is sunny outside. It’s a wee bit chilly but beautiful day.

As my depression acts up this is when I use my coping skills to make sure it doesn’t get worse or at least give it a try that it doesn’t get worse. In fact I used my coping skills box to help myself. One of the skills I used was Sudoku. I also did some cross-stitching and feeling like I am making some progress with it.

After I am done blogging, I am going to go and read. I’ll probably go to the local park and read. There is something special about reading outside. Reading appears to be helping me a great deal lately. Maybe it is because things are starting to get better that I am able to concentrate on reading.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

 

My Coping Skills Box

Hello, World!!! As I sit here at my laptop I’m thinking about my coping and the suggested therapy homework my therapist gave me yesterday during our session. The reason he suggested it is because it is an art project that he thought I would like to do. An art project that would help me in the long run. So, I decided to start making one last night. In fact I just finished and all I have to do is put coping skill stuff that will fit into it. I am happy that the coping skill box was an art project.

An art project that will help me help myself. I am going to be putting two stand alone books in the box. Stand alone books that are known to be what people call “eye candy” or “easy reads” because sometimes that is what is needed. I am going putting both Sudoku and Logic puzzles in my box to help me get out of emotional mind and think wisely. I also will be putting in some affirmations in the box to tell myself. I will be also putting in some cross stitch items as well.

When I need to use my coping skills box, I will have a plethora of choices to choose from. Having choices is always a good thing especially when you are needing ways on what to do when you are coping. Coping with undesired and intense emotions and/or urges.

Thank you for reading. Have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Cross Stitch
  • Color
  • Basically be lazy all day

Monday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art Group

Tuesday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Therapy /Case management

Wednesday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Not quite sure quite yet

Thursday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • See Psych ARNP
  • Clean Apartment

Friday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Again, another day with nothing really planned

Saturday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Cross Stitch
  • Be lazy

Weekly Check-In

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I should be volunteering however I am still dealing with the grief of loosing my grandma. I miss her very much.

Besides dealing with grief all week, I’ve been busy. Busy doing attempting to be a productive individual in society. Society that expect me to be doing well but I am not or least not where I want to be.

The week started out with me meeting with Gilbert (now old therapist), my now old case manager and my new clinician. It was interesting. Interesting in the fact I am not sure how this is going to play out for me therapeutically.

I have also been reading my book off and on this week and am grateful to have the time to read. I am enjoying the book I am reading.

Most importantly I am starting up cross stitching again. It is helping me with my depression symptoms. Cross stitching and reading is something I have been doing most of the day as it’s even too rainy for us Seattleites.

Now I am going to watch movies from my childhood and binge eat on stack food. Thank you for reading. Goodnight and Peace Out, World!!!

A Rainless Day In Seattle, It Is Not

Good Evening, World!!! It is a yucky weather day here in Seattle. The rain has stopped for now as pictured below. Yes, the ground is wet and the sky is grey but at least no rain for now. See picture below.IMG_0340.JPG

Something I did today was work on my stamped cross stitch. It is cross stitch where the pattern is stamped already to the fabric. Which is different from counted cross stitch. It is that of a skull. Kind reminds me of Day of the Dead skull. As you can tell from the picture below I’ve only done the red part of the eye on the left.

IMG_0336

I also read quite a bit today. I am grateful for days like today. I was pretty much able to be lazy for a good portion of it. I was able to cross stitch and read after getting food from the grocery store and farmers market earlier in the day. I love it when I get chores done early than I expect.

Thank you for reading. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!!.

 

 

Nap + Dinner = Better Mood

Good Evening, World!!! I’m in a slightly better mood than I was when I posted my last post. I owe it to being able to sleep due to taking a nap and eating dinner. Sleep and food always equals a better mood or at least it is for me. I had boxed mac and cheese for dinner. Not the best meal but hey it is comfort food. Comfort food is always a good thing.

I got my order from Amazon today. I got a cross-stitch pattern that I’ve been wanting to do. I am teaching myself to cross-stitch. I have found that is has been helpful when I’ve done a cross-stitch pattern before. So why not get back into it and continue to teach myself to cross-stitch.

Another thing I got from Amazon was yet another workbook. For me being able to help myself with my recovery is very satisfying. Yes, I still get professional help but being able to help myself is a good feeling.

Thanks for reading. It is very much appreciated from my end. Peace Out, World!!!

Good Morning!!

     Good Morning!! It’s Tuesday and I need to figure out what to do today. Structure is a good thing for me. Although staying home and being lazy sounds like a good idea. Maybe its because the weather isn’t so great today. I think it might be one of those days that I will spend the day with my boyfriend watching movies and doing jigsaw puzzles. I love jigsaw puzzles. I might even start on a new cross-stitching project today. I of course will continue to read A Tale Of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens. I am truly enjoying A Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens.

      Well I’m going to end this particular blog entry so I can go out and enjoy the day with whatever I may do. Have an awesome Tuesday everyone. Peace out and enjoy your day.

Full Moon Friday The 13th 2014

     Happy Full Moon Friday the 13th!! A full moon landing on Friday the 13th is a pretty uncommon but cool occurrence. The next time a full moon will on Friday the 13th will Friday, August 13, 2049. That’s 35 years away.

     Well, as some of you may be aware with reading my blog I work Fridays. Fridays are my Mondays. I didn’t have a good day at work. I had a co-worker tell me today, “you’re a nobody,” when I was taking a break. My eyes filled with tears and I said, “you’re right I am a nobody.” The look on his face was an oh shit what did I say look. The tears in my eyes were real and what he said to me triggered me greatly. It not only triggered my PTSD but some of the old tapes in my head. After splashing some water on my face I apologized to him for allowing him to get to me and that I would never tell anybody that they are a nobody. My break finished and I went back to work. Apparently he told on himself and told his department manager who told the store manager. So the four of us had a meeting. My co-worker apologized and I accepted it. The store manager asked why I didn’t notify him on what my co-worker said to me. I told the store manager that I didn’t report it to him because I didn’t think it was warranted. My co-worker looked and me and said, “It takes a lot for you to cry and if someone says something that makes you tear up then you should report it. That’s why I tattled on myself because I made you tear up.” I am just grateful that we got it taken care of. I shunned it off as it being Friday the 13th and a full moon.

     When I got home from work I realized that I felt like cutting myself due to being triggered so I took a nice like shower. After the shower I then finished up a cross-stitch project that I was doing. After I was done with the cross-stitch I put it away because I want to frame it and give it to my grandparents. (Side note: My grandparents helped raised me.) So when I put up my finished cross-stitching project for my grandparents I read a Wonder Woman comic book.

     I read the Wonder Woman comic because somehow it gives me a source of strength. I’m not sure why reading Wonder Woman gives me a source of strength but it does. She is the ultimate superhero. For the longest time she was the only female superhero. I wish that she wasn’t the only superhero girls had in the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s and even part of the 80’s but am grateful that she was there for us “girls” now women. I thank the feminist movement for making sure she stayed around.

     After I finished my Wonder Woman comic book I picked up the book, The Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens. I read the first 11 pages and realized that I was hungry. I fixed me some left overs and ate. After eating I read another 10 or so pages when I decided blog this particular entry. So far I am enjoying The Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens.

    Just so you all know that because I used the skills I learned I did NOT self harm. I think I was triggered to cut because of what was said to me at work earlier today. I am grateful that I used my skills to help me through the urges to self harm. My recovery means the world to me. Now what to do after I am done with this particular blog entry.

    Since I am planning on ending this particular blog entry I am think I am going to look for jobs in the peer support specialist/peer counseling because I am not working in a grocery store has never been my career path. I never thought I would still be working at a grocery store for nine years. So part of my plans for the rest of the evening is to look to see if there are any positions for peer support specialist/peer counseling. I know I am meant to be a peer counselor.

    Well, now that I bored you with my day I am going to end this blog entry. Have a great Full Moon Friday The 13th. Peace out and have out their in the world.