Tag Archives: Television

Beating My Depression

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am pretty sure that many people have heard the news of Luke Perry passing away due to a massive stroke. This saddens me as I remember watching 90210 as a tween turning into a teenager. Yes, Luke Perry was attractive but he wasn’t the one I had a crush on in the show but I did act like I had a crush on him to fit in with my friends. It is sad that Luke Perry is dead at the age of 52. It is just another reminder on how short life really is.

Now on to other stuff that isn’t as depressing as Luke Perry passing away. Anyway, I did some adulting today. Adulting that is much needed this time of month. That is paying my bills. Nobody that I know enjoys paying bills. I know I don’t like paying them but it is part of being an adult. Another part of me adulting today was to pick up my weekly psych meds. I wish I didn’t need to take meds for my mental health challenges but they are a necessary evil for me as if I don’t take them, my symptoms are that much more unbearable and challenging to deal with.

Today’s weather in Seattle was absolutely beautiful. Chilly but beautiful. I ended up taking a three mile walk after doing my adulting for the day. It was yet another much needed walk. The walk in the sunny weather was quite helpful for me. Getting the much needed Vitamin D was an added plus during my walk as it is usually dreary and drizzly this time of year in Seattle.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated on my end of things. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

All I Want Is Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I have not slept all night and it is now eleven o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world. At this point in time attempting to go to sleep will be useless as I have plans with friends to go eat lunch. Hopefully, after lunch with my friends, I can try to get a nap in.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I was going to binge watch a couple of television shows. I did binge watch a couple of television shows. I watched the Big Bang Theory and laughed my ass off. It feels good to be able to laugh.

Something else that I did to keep myself busy due to insomnia was art. I finished one painting that I will be giving to a friend for his birthday on Friday. I also started another painting and so far it is coming along nicely with a bit of a twist. I also did some coloring.

I, of course read some comic books. Specifically I read Wonder Woman comic books. I am in desperate need to catch up to the latest issue of Wonder Woman. I have been reading and collecting Wonder Woman comic books since I was five years old.

When I was doing some art and reading Wonder Woman comic books, I was listening to music. Music tends to help me be in the creative mind as well as to help me focus on things. In fact as I am writing this post, I have my music on. Currently, I am listening to my Recovery playlist on Spotify. Music tends to soothe my soul and heal my soul at the same time.

I do not have much more to say in this post. I really should start getting ready to go to lunch with my friends as it is eleven o’clock in the morning and we are leaving to go to lunch at twelve noon. I want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope you all have a great Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

A Sleepless Night In Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am having another sleepless night in Seattle due to insomnia. I wish I knew how I could get some sleep besides the typical stuff I already do. It is just frustrating as hell that I can not sleep. Not being able to sleep on the regular basis sucks and no matter what I try it may or may not help.

So, I have been watching television since my last post. I started out binge watching the Umbrella Academy as I really like this show. I realized that it was time of Saturday Night Live (SNL) and decided to watch SNL as comedy and humor help me get to sleep. After trying to sleep for about an hour after SNL got over with. After an hour of trying to sleep I decided to binge watch the Big Bang Theory. I love the show as it is hilarious.

Humor and comedy some how helps me with a great deal of things in my life. One of which is sleep. Another way humor helps is that it gets me to thinking in a more positive light and that is always a good thing. Laughter is in my opinion the best medicine.

I don’t have much more to say. I hope everyone enjoys their Sunday. I am going to attempt to get some sleep once again as it is just past three in the morning in my corner of the world. Have a great Sunday everyone. Peace Out, World!!!

A Sleepless in Seattle Type of Night

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is barely six forty five in the morning in my corner of the world and I have not been to sleep yet despite many attempts at sleep. I even took my as need (PRN) sleeping pill and that didn’t even work. I am annoyed that my sleep in inconsistent and that there is much my psych doctor and regular doctor can do except refer me a sleep study. I was referred yet I am unable to make an appointment due to the fact the medical review board at the office I was referred to has to review the referral first which make now sense to me especially since they haven’t even notified my insurance yet. I guess, I just want to figure out why I am not sleeping and am at a loss on what to do as the one thing that could possibly give any ideas has to review the referral and that could take up to six weeks which mean my insurance wont pay for it. I have to have an appointment scheduled within the first four weeks of the referral or my insurance won’t pay for it. And that frustration is whole other story I won’t even get into.

One of the things I have done to entertain myself was watch the Umbrella Academy. I am not finished with the season yet but it is getting extremely interesting. I am finding it very intriguing and entertaining. I am hoping to finish season one by the time Friday comes around.

The other thing that helped me get through yet another sleepless night is reading. I read comic books. Not just any comic books. I read Wonder Woman comic books. I love Wonder Woman. In fact I collect Wonder Woman comics as it is a hobby of mine. It is not just only a hobby but reading them is also a skill that helps me with challenging times. I read Wonder Woman comic books even when I am not having challenging times.

I am now watching the morning news. Not very much going on in the news that I am really interested with the exception of the weather. Everything else in the news in pretty bleak. The news is so freaking depressing.

I do not have much else to say. I just hope that when I attempt to go back to bed that I can actually fall asleep. Sleep is extremely important to ones mental health. I should get going so I can try to get some sleep since I didn’t have a wink of sleep all night. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated.  Have a wonderful Wednesday. Peace Out, World!!!

Bump In The Road

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! It hasn’t been the easiest of weeks for me emotionally. Having dealt with the one year anniversary of my grandma’s death just over a week ago is challenging enough but when other shit pops up makes it that much more challenging. Granted it is small shit but it is a bunch of small shit that has been building. Sadly, some of the small shit involves family. Specifically my mom and brother. I love them both but when I can’t get both side of the story, I can’t give the “advice” my mom wants me to give her. Anyway, there is other small shit that I won’t bring up but the mom and brother shit has been the most challenging as my mom won’t let up.

Anyway, when I saw my therapist for our scheduled appointment on Tuesday we discussed what was going on and he said “this doesn’t appear to be a crisis but just a bump in the road” and I have to agree with him. We discussed how the anniversary of my grandma’s death and all the small shit that has been building has increased my urges to self harm. We, of course discussed ways for me to keep myself from harming myself when the self harm urges get strong. Before my session with my therapist ended on Tuesday we made a “check-in appointment” for yesterday (Friday) to see how things were going. I of course went to the appointment and we did a check-in. We discussed plans for the weekend as well as ways to manage self harm urges. During my “check-in” session with my therapist, I brought up the fact that one of the things I would be doing was binge watching a Netflix show called The Umbrella Academy as I watched the first show on Thursday. I found out that he binged watched it with his wife and loved it. In fact one of the things my therapist is having me do this weekend when I watch Umbrella Academy is to write a paragraph or two on each show. I am not exactly sure why he is having me do this but I am thinking he seeing how some things can be beneficial  to me.

In fact last night (Friday) re-watched the first episode and did what my therapist wanted me to do. I also watched episodes two and three. I am really enjoying the show. In fact it is a show that is up my alley. The cool thing about it is when I watched the first episode on Thursday, I have discussed it with various people and I didn’t realize how popular it was. The best part of it being a popular show is that I didn’t start watching it because everyone was watching as I didn’t realize that most people I know were watching it as well.

One of the things I have been doing this weekend thus far is some art. In fact I am working on a piece of art work for a friend of mine as a birthday present. His birthday is the day after mine. I am painting him something as he is the one who got me into painting. It is not a big painting but a painting that I think he will enjoy and appreciate.

The other things I have been doing is a workbook called “The Artist Way.” In fact one of the things of the workbook is to journal everyday.  Journaling isn’t difficult but doing it everyday and it needing it to be three pages is challenging. In fact this is a workbook my therapist suggested for me to get and work on so I decided to do so. I have only been working on this workbook for a week and I find it challenging but I am also finding it helpful so far. In fact I plan to work on it some more today.

The one thing I have been doing this entire weekend except when I am watching Umbrella Academy and the news is listening to music. I have been mainly listening my Recovery Playlist but have also been listening to some emo music. Both have been quite helpful with reducing my self harm urges. Music is very soothing to the soul or at least it is for me.

I don’t have much more to say in the post. But before I end the post I want reassure everyone that I am not a risk to do any self harm acts. I am also not at risk to attempt suicide. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

The Irritability That Seems Like A Never Ending Story

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am quite irritable at the moment. My grandpa is starting to get on my nerves. First he won’t put in his hearing aids to the television is up to an unbearable noise. Noise to where his upstairs neighbor came down and him to turn it down. He said “no” and then twenty minutes later the cops showed up. Lets put it this way, he refused to turn it down and now the television is turn off. He said if “I can’t hear the t.v then nobody watches it.” Which means he is only punishing himself as well as me. All he needs to do is stick in his hearing aids and put on his hearing aid amplifier and then he would not have to be miserable. I just don’t understand why he could make life easier for himself by putting in his hearing aids. If he would have just turned down the television when the neighbor complained about it then the police would’t have been called by the neighbors. But then again the neighbors dog kept my grandpa, my uncle and myself up last night due to its howling. The dog must have been loud if my grandpa could hear it without his hearing aids. I am don’t trying to excuse my grandpa but his irritability as well as some of mine was caused by the neighbors dog due to the lack of sleep from the dog howling. The other part of my irritability is caused by the commotion that was caused due the loud television and the neighbor. I don’t blame the neighbor as it is Sunday and I wouldn’t want to hear somebody else’s television however her dog kept a lot of her neighbors up last night and not just my grandpa. I guess I am just frustrated over the entire issue as it could have been preventable if my grandpa would have swallowed his pride and put on at least his hearing aids.

Another reason why I am personally irritable is the pain I am in due to the oral surgery I had this past Wednesday. I know I shouldn’t be complaining about the pain as it is only temporary but my mouth hurts like hell and yes, I know I should be grateful and I am but I highly dislike being in pain. I know overall that getting my teeth fixed will help with my self esteem however it appears to me that all I am focused on is the now which is the pain and not what it will help me with later, my self esteem.

I have yet another reason why I am irritable which is me being hungry. I am not able to fully chew yet due to my gums not being fully healed from the surgery and I am not quite use to my dentures. I am pretty much still limited to liquids and some soft foods which sucks but I know once I am healed and use to the dentures I will be able to eat even more than I was able to before my teeth were pulled. I say that because my teeth were so bad I couldn’t eat nuts and I love nuts. I know some people struggle eating nuts with dentures but I know with practice and determination I will be able to eat nuts again.

I think I need to do something to help myself not be so irritable. I think I will read a chapter or two the book that I am reading. I also will do some art work. The only things I have to do art work wise here at my grandpa is collaging and coloring. So, think with the combination with reading and the art work I have to work on will help with my irritability. Irritability that is caused by a number of factors.

I don’t have much else to say and it is almost twelve noon in my corner of the world that I think it time to get something to eat. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated, as if it wasn’t for you my reader, I wouldn’t have continued to blog. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Dreaming of Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am unable to sleep. I am not sure why. I can only guess it is my insomnia acting up once again. I wish I could sleep  but unfortunately I am unable to do so. One of the ways I have been attempting to get back to sleep is by doing some mindfulness and meditation practices. Usually this helps after the third time but sadly it hasn’t helped.

Since I am unable to sleep, I have been trying to keep myself busy. I have worked on my art. Specifically, I have been painting and collaging. I have been doing a combination of both genre’s I mentioned. I must say the particular piece I am working on is coming out quite splendidly.

Another thing I have been doing to keep myself busy is binge watching television. I watched an entire season of Friends as well as a half season of M*A*S*H. I had some great laughs watching both shows as comedies help me in many ways.

Just a reminder that I have advertisements on my blog to help me earn a little extra money. I hope that you my reader would be willing to click on an ad or two, once or twice a week so I can earn the extra money so I can buy people gifts for the holidays coming up. I would be greatly appreciated if clicked on the ads. I may not make much with the ads but every penny counts. I really want to give the people in my life some gifts that they will enjoy for the holidays.

I want to thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate it very much. I hope everyone has a great Saturday and weekend and that you are able to enjoy some of the weekend. Again, thank you for reading. Hopefully, I will be able to get some sleep. Peace Out, World!!!

Phuck It, I’m Going To Bed

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I attempted to stay up all night but unfortunately I am unable to do so. It is three o’clock in the morning in my neck of the woods and tried to stay up to seven o’clock in the morning. I tried to stay up to seven in the morning my time because I have to be at work at eight o’clock at night and work a twelve hour night shift so if I slept through the day, the twelve hour night shift wouldn’t be so bad.

Things I have done to try to stay up was voting. Washington (State) has an all mail in ballot voting. So, I decided I would vote and now my ballot is in the mail box. I am not going to say who I voted for or what initiatives I voted for but I voted and hope that it counts. Hell, each persons vote counts.

One of the things I also did to try to stay awake is by doing art work. Specifically, I colored. I colored some prisms and mandala’s. It was nice and relaxing.

I also binge watched some television on a couple of streaming sights. It was helpful in keeping me awake but not helpful enough.

I just hope going to bed at three o’clock in the morning doesn’t make my shift at eight o’clock at night a long twelve hour long night shift. I hope I get a good nights or in my case days sleep so my shift doesn’t go by slowly or I don’t get tired. I guess what I am saying is I am really tired. I hope I am able to get enough sleep and not wake up too early for a twelve hour night time work shift. I am probably not making very much sense right now since I am so tired and attempting to stay awake as long as possible so I can make it through twelve hour night shift.

Thank you for reading my blog!!! I am grateful that you read it. Maybe when I have a free moment at work later on tonight I can post cause I know I will have time on my hands. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end. I hope everyone has a good nights sleep and/or good day at work. Peace Out, World and Good Night.

Thinking Of Ways To Stay Awake

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, once again, World!!! I am extremely tired and am more than reading to go to bed and most likely will be able to fall right to sleep however I am trying to stay awake as I work a twelve hour night shift for Thursday night into Friday morning. Right now it is 1:30 in the morning and it is officially Thursday morning. Late night television is done for the night and now I have to figure out ways to stay awake so I can sleep during the day.

I think after I am done posting this blog, I will take a shower as it will help me wake up. Taking a nice long shower helps me relax as well as wake me up. So I think that is what I am going to do after I am done posting.

After taking a shower, I am most likely going to be doing some binge watching some television. Not sure what television shows I will be watching but I know I will be binge watching some form of television show.

As I binge watch some form of television show I will do some art work. Actually, I most likely will be coloring as it is something that can be done with watching television. Coloring and binge watching television is quite helpful with keeping me awake.

Needing to stay awake all night to sleep during the day so I can stay awake for a twelve hour night shift is difficult at first. But I am sure once I get a regular schedule it won’t be as difficult. As difficult as it is to stay awake so I can sleep during the day so I can stay awake at work, my boss is appears to be quite supportive. He stated that if I needed help staying awake during my shift Thursday night into Friday morning, I could call him and he will help me stay awake. But I feel like doing what I am doing is the best way to stay awake for my shift for Thursday night into Friday morning. It is my first shift by myself.

My therapist informed me that when I get off on Friday morning, that I could call him to check in with him. He also stated that if I am not too busy sleeping during the day on Thursday that I could call him to check in about my anxiety regarding my first shift by myself.

I want to thank you for reading my blog and putting up with all the post tonight. I hope that the shower I take helps keep me awake so I can do some binge watching television as well as some coloring. Again, thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I am grateful for each one of you. If it was not for you my reader, my blog would not exist. I hope that if it is night time where you live that you are having a good night sleep. If it is not night time where you are, I hope that you have a good day. Again thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Midnight Madness & Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is officially twelve midnight in my corner of the world. I am tired as hell and personally, I probably could fall asleep now but I am attempting to stay awake all night as I have to work Thursday night from 8:00 pm to Friday morning at 8:00 am. I am attempting to stay awake all night since I have to be awake all night Thursday night so I can sleep all day on Thursday.

I watched the eleven o’clock news as I posted my last post. There was really nothing really good in the news which is normal. I guess according to the weather person, it is suppose to rain tonight and tomorrow which is typical for Seattle. It just hasn’t really been rainy which is unusual for this time of year in Seattle.

Right now, besides blogging, I am watching television. I am watch late night television. Once the late night television is done, I will then binge watch television or movies on Hulu and/or Netflix. Not sure exactly what I will watch. I just know I need to stay awake as long as possible so I can sleep during the day since I work a twelve hour night shift on Thursday night.

Well, as a reminder that might be quite annoying to you. I would really like you my reader to click on to the advertisements that are on my blog. Every time an advertisement is clicked on and fully loaded, I get money. I earn as little as a few cents and as much as few dollars per click of an ad. So please do me a favor and click on an ad or two at least once if not twice a week if you read my blog that often. I want the extra money to pay for gifts for my friends and family for the holiday season. Yes, I know its only October but I like to make sure the gifts I give are special to my loved ones.

Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great night. I hope that if you live in the United States or Canada that you having a good nights sleep. Again, thank you for reading. Good night, once again. Peace Out, World!!!