Fighting My Way Through Depression Symptoms

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am dealing with increased depression symptoms. Symptoms that have prevented me from working on my Intro to Poetry course I am taking through WordPress. I will start back up the course on Sunday morning. Poetry is quite helpful for me and the symptoms of the handful of mental health diagnosis I am diagnosed with.

The thing that has been helping me through this bought of depression is binge watching television shows since I haven’t been writing poetry. The two television shows I have been binge watching are. The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross and M*A*S*H. The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross has quite a calming affect on me. There is something about watching Bob Ross painting that is soothing or at least he is soothing to me. As far as M*A*S*H; the humor of the comedy of the show has me laughing. Laughing so much that I almost pee my pants. The soothing of Bob Ross and comedy of M*A*S*H is helping lift my depression symptoms and for me that is a great thing.

Since I have updated you on what is going on, I am going to end this blog post as I do not have much more to write about. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great weekend ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

Writing: Intro to Poetry; Day Three: Friends

Four Legged Furr Friend w/a Twitchy Tail

by Gertie

Billie, oh how

I love the fact that you are a

Love bug and a

Lap cat.

I love how you look at me with those big green

Eyes.

Don’t ever loose your

Enthusiasm for greeting me

At the door, as I know you love to

Nuzzle me because you missed me and know that I missed you. Please, know that I will love you to the very end.

Writing: Intro to Poetry; Day Two: Face

Untitled Poem

by Gertie

Look in the eyes of a person of color;

Let the person know they matter;

Let the person you know you care;

Let the person know you see their pain.

Now look into the mirror;

Look at your face, your white face,

and ask yourself,

“What can I do to help fight racism?”

Look into the eyes of another white person;

Now have a serious conversation about racism,

A conversation on how you and that person will help end racism.

Writing: Into to Poetry; Day One: Water

Untitled Poem

by Gertie

Water is peaceful.

As peaceful as a sleeping,

baby in their crib.

Update on Life the Last 24 Hours

Good Afternoon, World!!! I just want to update on life in the last twenty-four hours. First lets start off with my job interview yesterday. Overall, I think it went quite well. There were many awkward moments in the interview but went well. If I get the job, I will like the schedule for the most part. I will have to change some things with my volunteer job but it is workable. Even though the interview went well, I am not holding my breath that I will get the job. I just do not want to get my hopes up too high.

Now back to a couple of hours ago. I took my cat, Billie Dean, into the vet. Don’t worry Billie is just fine and dandy. He went to the vet to get his nails trimmed. It took longer than usual because the vet techs and vet wanted some cuddle time with Billie. The vet even took two dollars off the bill for letting her and her vet techs have cuddle time with my “love bug.” I cannot deny that Billie is a “love bug.”

Now on to a previous post in the last few days about me taking a couple of courses WordPress does for free. I signed up for the courses a couple of days ago and have assignments that I will start on tonight. I will be posting those assignments starting tomorrow. The courses I am taking our: Writing: Intro to Poetry and Photography: Developing Your Eye I. I have done both of these course before and loved them. So I am doing them again. Plus, I feel like if I do these courses again they will be of help to me to blog on the more regular basis. I want to blog on the regular basis to keep you my followers and regular readers engaged.

I do not have much more to discuss in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your Thursday. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Thoughts & Ideas

Hello, World!!! It is the middle of the night and I am unable to sleep once again. I wish I knew why I am unable to sleep but I realize that trying to figure it out will just frustrate the hell out of me.

As I sit here at my laptop, sleepless in Seattle once again, I am trying to figure out ways to blog on the regular basis. One thing that came to mind is to do free courses that WordPress does. I have decided to do their Writing: Intro to Poetry course as well as their Photography: Developing Your Eye 1 course. I figure if I do the courses it will help me get more in a groove of blogging on the regular basis. I know some people set up schedules and I have tried that which is something I will try again with the help of the WordPress courses I take.

I have officially signed up for the courses but I personally most likely won’t start them for a couple days. I am planning to do this so I can have time to work on the assignments. Of course when I work on the assignments, I hope to include my cat, Billie Dean in a couple of them. Most people love cats and hope including my cat, Billie will have new people reading my blog. I also want to incorporate Billie because, I love Billie and he is apart of my family.

I have also thought about other ways to blog on the regular basis. One of those ways is to discuss topics, you my reader are interested in. So, I guess I am asking you to do is comment on this post on what you would like me to discuss. I realize that my request appears to be a wee bit odd but I hope you will comment on this post on what you would like me to discuss.

I do not have much more to discuss. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things for reading my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog even though it is not interesting most of the time. I hope everyone has a great Tuesday ahead of them. Yes, I realize Alaska and Hawaii are still in Monday as I write this and hope they too have a great Tuesday ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

Plans in Regards to My Blog

Hello, World!!! I know I posted about two hours ago regarding my cat, Lil Gertie however I wanted to let you know what plans are for my blog for the next year. In fact it is one of my goals for this coming up year, 2020. One of my goals for the New Year is to blog an average of three times a week. I say average because some weeks, I will most likely only blog once or twice a week and other weeks I probably will blog everyday of the week. One way I plan on accomplishing this goal is to start doing my weekly plans on Sundays and on Saturdays to do weekly check-ins. I realize Saturdays might be challenging due to sleeping all day and working all night but I know if I schedule it in I will be able to do accomplish this. I am planning on doing this in hopes to keep you my reader engaged with continuing to reading and/or following my blog. So starting tomorrow, Saturday I will be doing weekly check-ins and starting on Sunday I will be doing weekly plans.

I do not have much more to say in regards this topic. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a good rest of their Friday. I also hope everyone has an awesome weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Check In

Good Evening, World!!! I have realized that doing a weekly check in with you my reader has helped me a great deal than you. I also realize that doing a weekly check in keeps you up to date on how things are going for me. It also helps with keeping you somewhat interested in continuing to read my blog. Yes, I know it is a bit selfish on my part however I know from experience when I follow a blog and the person doesn’t blog for awhile I tend to loose interest and I don’t want you to loose interest even though it is just about my boring ass life.

Now that I bored you on why I am doing weekly check ins again, let me bore you on what happened in my life this past week. I really didn’t do much this past week. I found myself doing art related stuff. Mainly, I colored and did some painting. I got inspired to do some painting by watching The Joy of Painting with Bob Ross. Granted, I didn’t do anything Bob Ross did and did an abstract painting.

Another thing I mostly did this week was read. I am reading How to Be an Antiracist. I am really enjoy the book. I am learning a great deal. I hope when I am finished with the book that I do a book review on it. I also hope that if I remember to blog at work during a slow moment that I tell you what I have learn thus far from the book.

Something I did this week was attend a writing class I am in. I love the writing class and am learning a great deal about characters and how to build a scene. I am enjoying the class immensely and will be sad when it ends in two weeks.

Sadly, something that didn’t happen this week was Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) group. I was so looking forward to group. Even though it is not easy to do and I have to take responsibility for my actions, I like the group.

The one thing the writing class and DBT group have in common is homework. I enjoy doing “homework” as it helps me build the structure I need for my everyday life as well as my recovery. Sadly, the homework for my writing class will end when the class ends.

Another thing I did was see my therapist. It was a good session. We scheduled an appointment for next week for three o’clock but forgot if it was for Tuesday or Thursday. But it something I can confirm on Monday which is something I will do.

The one thing I have also been doing is applying for new jobs. I really like my current job but it is the hours I don’t like. I am not fond of working a twelve hour night shift but at least it is job and am grateful for it. I just need a job that is not twelve hours and/or at night. In fact I a work tonight. I do enjoy my job.

I do not have much more to check in about. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys their weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

A Random Post About Things

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am still dealing with the symptoms of both PTSD and Depression which sucks shit. I wish I didn’t have to deal with any mental health diagnosis but sadly I do. There is not much I can do about having a mental health diagnosis except to use healthy coping skills.

Coping skills such as doing mindfulness and meditation practices. In fact this particular skill is something that I make an effort to do every morning on a way to start my day as I find if I quiet my mind at the beginning of the day, my day tends to be a more skillful day to where I can handle things more easily. I also try to use it throughout the day as mindfulness and meditation appears to help me reconnect with the present moment.

The thing I have been doing most of today that I have found quite helpful is writing. I am taking a creative writing class that is put on by an organization that puts on art and creative type of classes for low income people. Anyway, this quarter I am taking a creative writing class that focuses on characters and scenes but mainly characters and no it is not a play writing class. The organization that is putting on this class offers a variety of classes every quarter but you are only allowed to take one and this is the same organization I took my comics class with. Anyway, the instructor of the writing class assigns us homework so he can make comments on it so we know what to improve upon and what he thinks is great. The homework is not for grading but for feedback. I am really enjoying the class so far.

As much as I love to write, I was starting to come to a type of writers block in regards to my writing homework so I stopped and decided to do some things that needed to be done. One of those things that I needed to do was to make a doctors appointment with my primary care physician for my regular check up I have every two to three months. In fact I am about a month and a half over due for this appointment. After making my doctors appointment I went and picked up my meds. My psychiatric provider wants me to pick up my psych meds twice a week. So I pick them up ever Monday and Friday. There are reasons I will discuss at a later time on why I pick up my psych meds twice a week. I am not a big fan of it but if it is helpful for my recovery then I am willing to do so.

Now, I am about to go on to Spotify to listen to a podcast. Specifically, I will be listening to a podcast about philosophy. The philosophy podcast I will be listening to is Philosophize This. I am learning so much about philosophy from this particular podcast and am grateful for the learning for many different reasons. One such reason is it gives me something to discuss with others.

Since I will be listening to a podcast on philosophy I will also be coloring. I will be coloring the color page I have discussed with you as well as shared with you of what I had done. In fact I finally finished the bridge in the picture. In fact let me share with you what I have done thus far. The picture below is what I have accomplished so far:

20190819_132757

The picture I showed you in an earlier post except the bridge was just barely started and now the bridge is finished.

As you can tell from the picture above the bridge is complete but I have so much more coloring to do in the picture. I think, I will either work on the tree or the river next. Not sure what yet but will get to that once I turn on the philosophy podcast I am listening to.

Now that I have bored you to death with what I do to help myself when my PTSD and Depression act up, I am going to end this post. I also want to end the post so I can list to the philosophy podcast as well as color. But before I go, I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things as if it was for you my reader, I don’t think I would continue to blog and I would only journal. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great rest of your Monday. I also hope everyone has a great work week ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

Fighting Off Depression & PTSD

Hello, World!!! At this moment in time I am struggling with the symptoms of both my Depression and PTSD. I am not sure why the symptoms of my PTSD and Depression are acting up but they are. I wish I was not struggling with Depression or PTSD at the moment or ever but sadly both are a part of my life.

Since I am dealing with Depression and PTSD symptoms I am doing a variety of things to help not make the symptoms get worse are at least that is my hope. Right now I have been focusing on getting things together for a peer conference I will be attending on August 27th and August 28th however I will be arriving August 26th as I will be volunteering once again at this particular conference. I have attended every except the first year. So that means, I have volunteered at the second and third year it occurred and now am volunteering at the fourth annual Peer Pathways Conference. I am preparing for the conference by making my travel plans and booking a spot on an Amtrak train. I love taking the train. Another thing I am taking care of is making sure my cat, Lil Gertie, will be taken care of. Thankfully, I have secured a reservation for an Amtrak train and have secured a cat sitter for my cat, Lil Gertie. So, I am looking forward to this conference as many of the seminars, happen to be training’s that will be helpful for my career as a Peer Counselor even though I am not currently employed as one at the moment. The best part of this conference is that it is totally free for me since I am volunteering. Well, the conference, food, and hotel stay are free but I have to pay for my own travel which is okay with me. I will be going to the Amtrak station tomorrow to purchase my train ticket for my travels to the conference in a week. When I am at the conference I will miss my cat, Lil Gertie a great deal but she will be in good hands.

Speaking of cats, Lil Gertie, has been a great help with dealing with the symptoms of both my PTSD and Depression. She has been extra snugly and cuddly today which is something I have been need all day. I love the way she just lays on my chest and purrs. Having, Lil Gertie pick up on the signs when I am struggling is great because she didn’t need any training to do so and I haven’t had her since a kitten which means when I adopted her last year, she was meant to be my emotional support cat.

Another thing I have been doing to help combat my PTSD and Depression is doing homework for the writing class I am taking. I am really enjoying the writing class as it is focusing on characters and later scenes and now it is not a play writing class. I am enjoying the fact that I am learning different types of characters and how they play a part in a story. Maybe I can share one of my homework assignments with you later on in the writing course I am taking.

Besides writing another creative way I have been trying to reduce my Depression and PTSD symptoms is art work. The genre of art I have been focusing on besides writing is coloring. Coloring has been quite helpful for me and plan on giving away the stuff I color away as gifts. I will be framing the finished coloring projects so people can put it on their walls. I love to color and have been coloring since I was a kid. I got made fun of as a teenager because I continued to color and now “adult coloring” is a thing and it is something I never stopped doing. Coloring relaxes me.

I don’t have much more to say because I would end up repeating myself and nobody wants that. I want to thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great week ahead. Peace Out, World!!!