Sleepless In Seattle & In An Ambien Fog

Good Morning, World!!! I am sleepless in Seattle and have taken my Ambien which means I am in an Ambien fog. I am blogging in an Ambien fog in hopes that it will help me become sleepy.

I have done my normal sleep hygiene routine and even took an Ambien yet sleep isn’t coming easy to me tonight. I even had a busy Monday to help me sleep better. But apparently sometimes everything you do to help you get to sleep doesn’t always help. I guess it is just time to try to lay down again and try to get to sleep. Not getting a good nights sleep can have an effect on ones mental health so I really need to get to bed as soon as possible. It could effect physical health as well.

Have a good night sleep. Peace Out, World!!!

Update on Doctor’s Appointment

Good Morning, World!!! Yup, it is still morning in my corner of the world. I went to my doctor’s appointment and it went well. I have a slight concussion from being hit in the eye by a neighbor. I am taking 800mg ibuprofen for the pain and an anti-nausea medicine for nausea.

I am now going to read. I am not sure if I am going to read my Star Wars book or a book on Buddhism. I might read both at some point today. I might even do a workbook or two as well. I love to read and work on my workbooks.

Thank you for reading. Peace out, World!!!

Nothing But Random Thoughts

Hello, World!!! I am sitting here just going to blog about whatever the hell is on my mind at the moment. I don’t care what comes out of my fucking mouth right now. I am a little angry for no apparent reason.

I am angry at myself for locking myself out of my apartment. This increased my anxiety. So, I took my Xanax to help me with the anxiety once I was let back in. I had to wait an hour and half before someone could come unlock my door.

Now I am going to read my book about Why Buddhism Is True by Robert Wright. After that I will read my Buddhist Scriptures as this might be of help me to help myself calm down from the anxiety.

Having a spiritual bath is a key part to people’s recovery. I hope this the right path for me especially in regards to my recovery. Plus to help reduce my anger and anxiety without having to take any meds for it.

I think I might be doing some more painting to help me through the anxiety. Painting helps me express all my emotions when I have trouble acknowledging what they are.

Thank you for reading. Have a good Mother’s Day!!! Peace Out, World!!!

Midnight Ramblings

Hello, World!!! It is midnight in my corner of the world. I am up watching television. Actually, I am watching The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. I watch this show as it helps with my anxiety especially before I go to bed for the night.

Another thing that helps with my anxiety is the new weighted blank I got today. I really recommend it as it appears to be helpful. Or at least the twelve or so hours I have had it. I didn’t think it would be helpful and boy was I wrong.

I have been working on one of my workbooks. In fact I have been working on the workbooks that deals with mindfulness. Focusing on mindfulness as been quite helpful when I am dealing with.

I think the Ambien is starting to kick in. I think I should get some sleep before I get a little loopy from the Ambien.

Thank you for reading. It is very much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Back From The Emergency Room

Good Morning, World!!! I am back from the emergency room (ER). They gave be some other meds to help me sleep. They want me to try to get sleep without the meds first. I will try to take a nap but wont take the meds till tonight. The doctor wants me to contact my mental health treatment team which I am going to do. I just want to sleep.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Wanting The Oh So Elusive Sleep

Good Morning, World!!! It is now five thirty in the morning for me. I still haven’t gotten any sleep. Sleep that I am desperately wanting and needing. I finally took some Ambien and it didn’t fucking work. It usually does and it is frustrating the hell out of me that I can not get some fucking sleep.

I am so frustrated that it is putting me in crisis mode. Enough of a crisis mode that once I am done blogging, I am going to take myself to the Emergency Room (E.R). I will be okay, I just need someone to fucking hear me on how fucking frustrating getting no sleep is. Right now I think going to the E.R is the best bet. I don’t want to concern you all. I just wanted to let you know what is going on. I know I will be okay, I just need to get the sleep thing taken care of.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

May Is Mental Health Month

Hello, World!!! May is mental health month. Today, is the first day of mental health awareness month. I hope that I can have at least one educational piece about mental health each day of this month. I can’t promise I will be able to do so but I can at least try.

My goal for mental health month and beyond is to help lesson the stigma about mental health. For me stigma is one of the biggest issues that we who have a mental health diagnosis struggle from beside our symptoms of the illness as the the side effects of meds.

Thank you for reading and hope you can help me with fighting the stigma that goes to having a mental health challenge. Peace Out, World!!!

Still Awake in Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! It is just after five thirty in the morning and I still haven’t been to sleep. Yes, I have attempted to get to sleep, I just was unable to do so. I even took my Ambien to be able to sleep and still a no go at the oh so elusive sleep.

Despite getting no sleep I have managed to stay busy. I pretty much stayed busy by reading. Reading appears to be one of my go to activities as of lately. I enjoy reading immensely.

Even though I read most of the night, it still didn’t take my anxiety away a hundred percent. I am worried about money like many people around the world are. I am worried that my tax refund check won’t get here in time to pay the rent. I know I am most likely worried about nothing but I am worried.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Home From the Emergency Room (E.R)

Good Evening, World!!! I am home from the Emergency Room (E.R). I went to the E.R because I self harmed again. I ended up getting stitches. While in the E.R I used my coping skills. I ended up doing some are work. Specifically, I colored mandala’s. The nurses and social work were impressed with my color scheme of the mandala’s.

The social worker on duty asked what let me to self harm this time and I explained that I dissociated and that is when I self harmed. Dissociation is a problem for me and when I self harm while dissociated it makes it that much worse for me.

Now that I am home, I will be working on one of my workbooks. Not sure which one yet but I will do one. I have found that workbooks help me with my recovery. My therapist likes the fact that I do self help workbooks to help myself and my recovery.

Thank you for reading. Peace out, World!!!

Got Sleep?!?!

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am dealing with a major case of insomnia. Insomnia that meds won’t even work for. I took my Ambien right after my last post and well here I am still wide awake. Normally, taking the Ambien works but apparently it is not working tonight and it is frustrating as hell.

As frustrating as it is to not sleep at least I have been able to use my coping skills. Coping skills to help me through the night. The coping skills that I have been doing are art and reading. I have been painting as well as reading The Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb. At least my coping skills have been helpful to me tonight.

Thank you for reading. I hope everyone has a wonderful day. Peace Out, World!!!