Tag Archives: Meds

Still Awake in Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is just after five thirty in the morning and I still haven’t been to sleep. Yes, I have attempted to get to sleep, I just was unable to do so. I even took my Ambien to be able to sleep and still a no go at the oh so elusive sleep.

Despite getting no sleep I have managed to stay busy. I pretty much stayed busy by reading. Reading appears to be one of my go to activities as of lately. I enjoy reading immensely.

Even though I read most of the night, it still didn’t take my anxiety away a hundred percent. I am worried about money like many people around the world are. I am worried that my tax refund check won’t get here in time to pay the rent. I know I am most likely worried about nothing but I am worried.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Got Sleep?!?!

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am dealing with a major case of insomnia. Insomnia that meds won’t even work for. I took my Ambien right after my last post and well here I am still wide awake. Normally, taking the Ambien works but apparently it is not working tonight and it is frustrating as hell.

As frustrating as it is to not sleep at least I have been able to use my coping skills. Coping skills to help me through the night. The coping skills that I have been doing are art and reading. I have been painting as well as reading The Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb. At least my coping skills have been helpful to me tonight.

Thank you for reading. I hope everyone has a wonderful day. Peace Out, World!!!

Nothing Much Exciting To Read

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! So far today has been an uneventful day. A day full of boredom that thankfully didn’t lead to isolation. As I mentioned in my last post isolation is not a good thing for me. I am grateful that I went to day treatment as I interacted with folks. I went because I have been isolating and Junior is working today.

With all that being said, I am glad I went. I helped make lunch for the folks at treatment and enjoyed cooking. We had chicken stir fry. People appeared to like the food.

I also ended up working on one of my workbooks. The workbook I am working on is my Queer and Transgender Resilience Workbook. It is helping me a great deal with how I view myself as a non-binary, gender fluid, gender queer individual.

I was just finishing up a chapter in my workbook when it was time to do my fifteen minute Friday check-in with my therapist. It ended up being a 45 minute check in as we discussed a little bit about my workbook. We also discussed my med change yesterday and how I felt about it. We also discussed what I was going to do this weekend. We came up with me hanging out with a friend at the stupid mall.

After seeing my therapist, I came home. Now, that I am home I am relaxing before I clean my apartment. I feel like it is getting cluttered again. So I am going to be purging some things. Nobody really like to clean but it is a necessary part of living a life worth living or at least being and an adult.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated al the from drizzly Seattle. Happy Friday and Peace Out, World!!!

An Accomplished Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I sit here today feeling accomplished. Well, not exactly accomplished in a way others may few accomplished.

I started out the day with having an appointment with my new psychiatric nurse practitioner. She appears to be nice and recovery focused. She took me off of my Seroquel as she believes I don’t need to be on it as I am also on Abilify.

Next thing I did was file my taxes. I am not getting as much back this year as previous year because I didn’t work most of last year. I am okay with that as I am happy with what I am getting back.

The last thing I did was spend about an hour cleaning my apartment. It is nice having a clean place. Having my apartment clean helps my depression.

I wish this feeling of accomplishment was the same sense of accomplishment after a hard days work but I’m okay with it.  Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Back Home In The Concrete Jungle of Seattle

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! The funeral was amazing. I am finally back home in the concrete jungle I call Seattle.

The first thing I am going to do after I am done blogging is call Gilbert, my therapist. After that I’m going to get my meds. Good ole meds in the jungle of Seattle.

Thank you for reading my short ass post regarding me back in the concrete jungle of Seattle. Thank you so much for reading and Peace Out, World!!!

Tuesday Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! The last six days has not been the easiest for me. First my grandma died and then last night a neighbor was being a jerk and physically attacked me. I naturally called the police and filed a police report as well as went to the hospital. Good thing is that I have now broken bones. Bad news is that my face is swollen and I have bruising on my arms and back.

The doctor gave me some strong pain meds. He and I discussed ways to reduce my pain without meds as I only asked him to prescribe only three. I informed him that I do daily mindfulness and meditation practice twice a day and that I tend to do extra practices when I am in pain and/or have high anxiety. The doctor was impressed that I have non-medicine ways to deal with pain.

As expected and not surprising my PTSD is acting up. It is acting up severely and is an opportunity to use my mindfulness skills. Skill that have been quite helpful for me.

Thank you for reading. It is much appreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

A Little Buzzed

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I’m a little buzzed from drinking some alcohol. I normally don’t drink but thought I would have a couple tonight. I don’t like the feeling of being buzzed. Alcohol and my meds usually don’t mix so I’m not sure if I will take them tonight as I don’t want to cause any problems.

Some people would say drinking alcohol during a painful time in my life is not wise and they would be correct. I realize this as I choose to not drink but on an occasional basis. I’m not drinking to make the pain go away or to escape it. I just thought I would enjoy some Irish Cream in my hot chocolate.

I miss my grandma and want to make her proud. I’m not sure how to do that right now but I want to make her proud of me.

Thank you for reading.

Photography 1: Day 1; Home

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! Today is the first day of the Photography; Developing Your Eye Day One. Today’s topic is home. Home can mean different things to different people. When I think of home I think of the neighborhoods I live or have lived in. Specifically, the neighborhood I grew up in as well the one I currently live in. If I had photo’s of the neighborhood grew up in I would be sharing them with you but I don’t so I can’t.

When we think of home we all think of the neighborhood we live in. That’s why I’ve decided to share photo’s of my current neighborhood. Each photo will have a description of what that specific place means to me and/or the neighborhood below the photo.

IMG_0168This King County Metro bus travels through my neighborhood every 20 minutes or so. It goes to one of my favorite places to hang out which is the Ballard Locks.

IMG_0166This is one of the many bikes that clutters Seattle’s neighborhood’s including mine. You can rent for money to ride to get where you are going. The down fall is you have to have a smart phone to do so and not everyone has one. I’ve never rented one and don’t plan to. They litter the sidewalks and have usually fallen on the ground. This one is in rare form and actually in an upright position.

IMG_0172Good ole Seattle traffic. You can see that it has been raining in this picture as I shot it looking towards downtown which you can sort of see. This is one of the many reasons people ride their bikes and/or take public transportation.

IMG_0170Good ole Seattle Fire Department. In fact this is the engine Junior works on. Lights and sirens were going at the time of the picture. Something one gets to living in the city and near a fire station.

IMG_0164Another joy of living in the city is the never ending construction!!! (Can you hear me being sarcastic?) You can see one of the many cranes Seattle has. Last time I checked Seattle had the most cranes working in the using at the moment.

IMG_0169The iconic Blue Moon Tavern. It opened in April of 1934 and back then it was state law that all bars had to be at least a mile away for college campuses. Not sure if it’s still state law but this is an iconic bar.

IMG_0157Washington’s own pharmacy. Its a family run local drug store chain. Bartell’s has several stores around the Puget Sound area. This is the particular Bartell’s in my neighborhood and is where I get my meds at.

Now that you have had a tour of my neighborhood, I hope you feel at home. Thanks for reading. Have a great day and go enjoy your neighborhood. It’s an extension of your home. Peace Out, World!!!

Is It Too Much To Ask That I Get Some Sleep?

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I’m finding myself not being able to sleep once again. Its not like that I don’t have a regular sleep hygiene plan I do ninety percent of the time. Before, I go on let me give you the definition of sleep hygiene: Sleep hygiene is a variety of different practices and habits that are necessary to have good nighttime sleep quality and full daytime alertness.

I do have multiple practices and habits that I do a good portion of the time. Yes, I do need to do some things differently however for the most part my sleep hygiene plan works despite having “treatment resistant insomnia.” Not sure what exactly that means but I know that part of my nighttime ritual is to take sleep meds every other night. In fact my sleep hygiene schedule is (all times are Pacific Time):

9pm: Read a book or comic book,

10pm: Color and/or jigsaw puzzle while listening to music.

11pm: Eleven O’clock news.

11:30pm: Meds

11:35pm: The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon.

12:30am: Meditation/Mindfulness practice

12:45am: Lights out and bed time.

7am: Out of bed no later than seven o’clock in the morning except weekends then its eight o’clock in the morning, no matter what. This is to help with good sleep habits.

Despite not having very good sleep that last few days I haven’t taken a nap. That’s another important part of having a good sleep hygiene plan is to try and not take naps. If you do limit the length of the nap and try to not make it late in the day. I’m pretty good at not taking naps. Another key part to good sleep hygiene is to go to bed at the same time at night and get up at the same time in morning. I have found this quite helpful. The thing I need to work on is to lessen the about of caffeine and sugar I have before bed as this can be a hindrance to getting a good night sleep.

Of course my PTSD nightmares don’t help with me not sleep through the night however that’s why I take meds for nightmares. The meds for nightmares appear to be helping.

I should really get going and try to get back to sleep. Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Halloween, 2017

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Halloween!!! It’s been a couple of days since my last post. Overall, today has been a good day despite a few set backs. Set backs I hope to talk to my therapist about tomorrow.

As many of you know, today is Halloween which means I dressed up in a costume. I don’t care what others thought of me as it is only one time of year. On that note, I went to see my psychiatric nurse practitioner today dressed as Eeyore. My psychiatric nurse practitioner was “impressed” that I had the “courage” to dress up. I don’t think it takes courage to dress up in a costume on Halloween. Anyway, my meds got changed slightly. One med got increased while my sleeping med got completely changed. Part of the reason he changed is because its a benzo and it can feed two birds with one grain. It can help me sleep as well as help with anxiety. Not sure if I like the idea as it is a benzo and my dad was addicted to benzo’s  when I was a kid. But I am willing to give it a try. Worse case scenario, it doesn’t work and I get put back on my other med.

Before I end this post, I am looking forward to attending a Halloween party with my partner that our friends are hosting. Junior is going as a Zombie. Don’t ask me why but he is. For him that an easy costume so I guess that’s why he is going as a Zombie. We are both looking forward to spending time with each other and our friends. I am having some anxiety about attending the party however getting out and not isolating with be helpful to me.

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you all have a great rest of your Halloween. Please stay safe. Peace Out, World!!!