Yucky Weather + Depression = Desire to Isolate

Good Morning, World!!! I didn’t get much sleep last night but I did get more than the night before. Getting sleep is key to helping the symptoms of the mental health challenges I face. Yes, I may have gotten slightly more sleep last night and it is helping my mood just in the slightest, I just don’t think it is exactly enough to help beat off the depression symptoms.

I don’t think it is enough to be off the depression symptoms because it is the time of year they get worse and well the typical yucky Seattle weather ain’t helping much. In fact the weather today, I think is making the symptoms a little bit worse. Worse in a sense that I am wanting to isolate. Part of is cause of the weather while the other part is due to the depression symptoms which both really suck today.

As much as I want to isolate today, I am unable to do so because I have two appointments today. One with my therapist which is much need and the other is with my employment specialist. I really need my therapy today even though I really do not want to go, mainly because of my depressive symptoms and a little to do with the yucky Seattle weather. No matter how I feel, I need to attend both appointments today due it will ultimately help my recovery. All I can say is the depression suck shit.

I don’t have much else to say in this post so I think I am going to end it for now. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciate it from my end of things as well as from the bottom of my heart. Again, thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone enjoys their day. Peace Out, World!!!

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Still Fighting Off Fucking Depression

Good Afternoon, again, World!!! I am still fighting off fucking depression however it is slowing going away with the things I have done so far. I hung out with a friend. We went to Red Robin and had a late lunch, early dinner. We then walked around the mall and ended up getting pictures with Santa Claus. Getting a picture together with Santa was fun.

Even though the holidays bring more depression my way, I am glad I am coming up with new ways to fight off the depression and to start new traditions. My friend and I are going to do the Santa picture every year from now on.

I am now at my volunteer job waiting for five o’clock to come around as that is when my shift start. I only have about fifteen more minutes till my shift starts which is okay with me. I love my volunteer job. I have been at this volunteer job for four years now. It has helped me a great deal with my life and mental health.

Granted my depression is still acting up at the moment but I am glad I have decided to not isolate. Isolation is a persons worst enemy when they have depression. Fighting isolation and depression sucks shit but I am currently doing it at the moment.

I am just realizing this is my third post today. I have not posted multiple times in a day in a very long time. I am grateful that I am utilizing this great coping skill for me. I hope that me blogging helps you my reader.

I do not have much else to say. I hope everyone has an awesome Saturday afternoon and evening. Thank you so very much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of this. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

More Monday Moodiness

Hello, World!!! It is still Monday in my part of the world. I am still dealing the Monday moodiness I wrote about in my last post. I am still dealing with depression, grief and isolation as well as other not so good emotions.

I have been doing things to help me through the rough emotions since my last post. My cat is now back sitting next to me on my chair. She is purring right now and the purring is helping calm me down.

I have also done some art work. I have done some painting. I am painting something for a friend of mine to give as gift to her as she has been of great support to me. I am not finished with the painting and she has no idea I am painting her something. I hope to be able to give it to her by Thanksgiving.

I have also been writing. I have been mainly writing poetry. Poetry that I hope to share with you my reader someday but not today. Writing poetry is quite helpful for me and I wrote a poem for my grandma in regards to dealing with my grandma’s death on Valentine’s Day of this year (2018).

Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope to blog again tomorrow. I hope to inform you how my doctors and therapy appointments go tomorrow. Thank you again for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Monday Moodiness

Good Evening, World!!! Right now, I am realizing that I have been moody most of the day. I have been moody for many reasons. My depression is acting up. My grief dealing with my grandma hit me like a tsunami today. Oh yeah and that weather sucks shit.

It doesn’t help things that I have been isolating myself today. Not sure why I am isolating today but I have. I did email my therapist and primary care doctor about the depression, grief and isolation. Both my doctor and therapist reminded me of my appointments with them tomorrow which I know will be quite helpful for me. My therapist also informed that I do have refills for my psych meds as he talked with the “shrink on duty.” So, at least I know I have meds for the next two weeks.

My cat, Lil Gertie, has been of great help to me today. She has been laying by my side on my share or laying on my lap. She even let me hold her for about ten minutes as I paced around my apartment. She usually only lets me hold her for about two to three minutes max. She is an awesome emotional support animal. Right now she is taking some “me time” by sleeping on my bed. Everyone needs some space at times and she has done a very good job with supporting me today so she deserves the “me time.”

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Knowing that I have perfect strangers that care about me and that I am able to help by sharing my story helps me get through tough days like today. I hope everyone has a good rest of your Monday. Enjoy your week with whatever you are doing. Peace Out, World!!!

It’s Been A Couple Of Days

Hello, World!!! It has been a few days since I last posted. In all honesty things haven’t been going all that well for me and surprisingly I haven’t been hospitalized. Mainly, because I have been isolating so I won’t do anything. No, I am not currently suicidal nor am at risk of self harming myself. I have been disassociating bad enough that I lost track of my days and missed my appointment with my therapist yesterday.  So, since I missed my appointment with my therapist yesterday, I think it might be a wise decision for me to try to connect with him at some point today.

Due to the dissociation I don’t remember much of this week including yesterday, the first day of summer.  For me the solstice is a major deal especially the summer solstice. It helps me remember to focus on my goals for the year and to see where I am at with my goals. Goals that I wanted to go over with my therapist yesterday with my therapist.

I have an inkling that there is a very small chance of me being hospitalized just for the fact I haven’t been taking care of myself this past week. On a good note I have been taking care of my cat, Lil Gertie. Having an emotional support animal like my cat has been quite helpful for me.  I think, Lil Gertie has been a life savor for me.

I think I am going to go now and call my therapist. I hope everyone has wonderful summer. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

So Far So Good

Good Afternoon, World!!! It’s been a pretty chill day for me. I went grocery shopping for myself and my grandpa wanted to tag along. It was nice spending time with my grandpa while doing a chore I don’t really like doing; grocery shopping. My grandpa likes grocery shopping for some reason so whenever I go it’s when I spend time with him.

In all honesty if I didn’t need to go grocery shopping, I think I would have isolated today. Not sure why the depression is acting up to where I want to isolate a lot lately. Since I am aware that the depression is acting up to where isolation could become a problem, I know what I need to do. I need to use my DBT skills. Skill that have helped me a great deal.

Today is going to be one of many days that will be above eighty degrees Fahrenheit here in Seattle. Many locals start to melt at eighty degrees. I however start to melt at about ninety five degrees due to spending the majority of my childhood in Southern California. Days like today are the one reason why make an effort to go for walk. Going for walks on days like today help bring up the good parts of my childhood. Most of the good parts involve me being in California living with my dad and grandparents.

I think I am going to go so I can go for a walk. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Just Some Random Thoughts

Good Morning, World!!! I am not quite sure how I am doing this morning. I just know I got sleep and am happy about that. Sleep doesn’t come easy for me and am eager to let people know that I received a semi-good night of it.

Right now I feel like social media such as Facebook can cause me to isolate from the “real world.” I learned this when I did some of my homework for both Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and my therapist.  I learned from the homework assignments that setting a set time I spend on social media.

I am looking forward to art group. Art group happens early this afternoon. I love attending art group. Art helps me express my emotions in ways I can not explain.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!