Sleepless, Once Again, in Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! I’m Sleepless in Seattle, once again. Since, I am having trouble I decided to work on my workbook: The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook. I am finding this quite challenging for me as its really digging deep into who I am as a genderqueer non-conforming person. Stuff that I’ve been talking to both my therapist, Gilbert, and case manager about. They are helping me process what I need to while doing this workbook.

I also decided to start another self-help work book called The Mindfulness Workbook. It’s a beginners guide to overcoming fear and embracing compassion. I figured since one of my goals for 2018 was to increase my mindfulness and meditation skills. I am incorporating this into my daily practice now in the mornings.

Mindfulness seems to be helping me a great deal with my emotions and how I reacting to them and situations. Gilbert even mentioned it on Friday which shocked me as I wasn’t sure he was observing that.  It’s even helping my mental health symptoms.

Unfortunately, the lack of sleep is not helping with the mental health symptoms which is why I should get going. I think I will try to go and attempt to get some sleep. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World

Weekly Plans

I almost forgot to do my weekly plans post. I did really well with what I planned for last week except for specific blog post and going to Social Security.  Here is what I have planned for this week and everything for today is already accomplished.

Sunday:

  • Blog. Well I’ve done this quite well as this is my sixth blog of the day.
  • Workbook. Done
  • One load of laundry. I did two loads
  • Buy new black dress shoes for interviews this week. Done
  • Get phone fixed. Done
  • Take out garbage. Done.

Monday:

  • See psychiatric nurse practitioner
  • Attend Knitting Group
  • Attend Art Group
  • See Gilbert for therapy
  • Workbook
  • Clean Kitchen and Entry way.
  • Blog

Tuesday:

  • Job interview
  • See Recovery Coach
  • Workbook
  • Clean Living Room
  • Blog

Wednesday:

  • Job interview
  • Therapy with Gilbert
  • Workbook
  • Continue Cleaning living room
  • Blog

Thursday:

  • Social Security
  • Workbook
  • Blog
  • Clean Bedroom

Friday:

  • Blog
  • Workbooks
  • Therapy with Gilbert
  • Clean Bedroom and bathroom

Saturday:

  • Blog
  • Workbook
  • Volunteer at Warm Line

I will be also visiting my grandma everyday I am able to. I hope everyone has a good week. Have a goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

Underdog, No More

The Superbowl and the Eagles winning the Superbowl had me thinking. Had me thinking about my own life. A life worth living is a life worth fighting for. The Eagle fought like hell to win the Superbowl so I need to fight like hell for my recovery. A recovery that I’ve already have been fighting for and will continue to do so.

For me I’ve been an underdog my whole life because of my learning disabilities, mental health conditions/challenges, sexual orientation and gender identity. With all that I just mentioned, I’ve been the underdog my whole life. I’m still considered an “underdog” yet I’m advocating for myself to be the success I want to be in my life. A success I’ve had before and know I will have once again.

I guess, I am saying is I’m not going to be the victim any more and most definitely won’t be the underdog, no more. For me that will be advocating for myself. I will be advocating for others as well. I wont allow myself to be an underdog no more.

Thank you for reading. I hope the rest of your Sunday is a peaceful one. Goodnight and Peace Out, World!!!

Photography 1: Day 2; Street

Good Afternoon World!!! Today is the second day of Photography; Developing Your Eye; Day Two. Today’s topic is street. Piggy backing on yesterdays theme of home and how I shared pictures of my neighborhood I’m going to discuss the “main” street of the neighborhood I live in.

IMG_0249University Way NE fondly known as the “Ave.” The story behind on why its call the “Ave” is because at one point in time the street was called 14th Ave NE and the business’s in the area wanted to bring more business to the area so it started calling it the “Ave.” The city decided to change the name of the street to University Way NE due to the reason that the University of Washington is in this neighborhood yet the “Ave.” stuck.

IMG_0252Looking South on the “Ave.”

IMG_0251

Looking North on the “Ave.”

So as I hope you enjoyed getting to know me a little more with both todays and yesterday’s post as I showed you around my neighborhood. I hope everyone has a good afternoon and good work week. Peace Out, World

Life, The Challenges & Silver Linings

Good Morning, World!!! Its been a tough week for my family. My grandma is going into hospice care and we are attempting the best we can to keep it together for her. My grandma is a strong woman. She keeps giving me “talks” to make sure I go to my job interviews next week.

I am looking forward the possibility of going back to work. I’ve been missing being able to go to work. I really think being able to go to work helps with my mental health or at least the structure that goes with it. Being out of work has you think how much structure one must have to be able to not get so depressed or at least that is how it is for me. Work also gives me the social aspect of life. So for me work helps a great deal with a multiple of things in my life.

Life brings the bad and the good. Sometimes at the same time like at the moment. As life continues I am looking at the silver lining in things. Its difficult at time however it is possible. Yes, I am being realistic about my grandma however I know she wants me to look at the silver lining.

Thank you the reading. Have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Photography 1: Day 1; Home

Good Afternoon, World!!! Today is the first day of the Photography; Developing Your Eye Day One. Today’s topic is home. Home can mean different things to different people. When I think of home I think of the neighborhoods I live or have lived in. Specifically, the neighborhood I grew up in as well the one I currently live in. If I had photo’s of the neighborhood grew up in I would be sharing them with you but I don’t so I can’t.

When we think of home we all think of the neighborhood we live in. That’s why I’ve decided to share photo’s of my current neighborhood. Each photo will have a description of what that specific place means to me and/or the neighborhood below the photo.

IMG_0168This King County Metro bus travels through my neighborhood every 20 minutes or so. It goes to one of my favorite places to hang out which is the Ballard Locks.

IMG_0166This is one of the many bikes that clutters Seattle’s neighborhood’s including mine. You can rent for money to ride to get where you are going. The down fall is you have to have a smart phone to do so and not everyone has one. I’ve never rented one and don’t plan to. They litter the sidewalks and have usually fallen on the ground. This one is in rare form and actually in an upright position.

IMG_0172Good ole Seattle traffic. You can see that it has been raining in this picture as I shot it looking towards downtown which you can sort of see. This is one of the many reasons people ride their bikes and/or take public transportation.

IMG_0170Good ole Seattle Fire Department. In fact this is the engine Junior works on. Lights and sirens were going at the time of the picture. Something one gets to living in the city and near a fire station.

IMG_0164Another joy of living in the city is the never ending construction!!! (Can you hear me being sarcastic?) You can see one of the many cranes Seattle has. Last time I checked Seattle had the most cranes working in the using at the moment.

IMG_0169The iconic Blue Moon Tavern. It opened in April of 1934 and back then it was state law that all bars had to be at least a mile away for college campuses. Not sure if it’s still state law but this is an iconic bar.

IMG_0157Washington’s own pharmacy. Its a family run local drug store chain. Bartell’s has several stores around the Puget Sound area. This is the particular Bartell’s in my neighborhood and is where I get my meds at.

Now that you have had a tour of my neighborhood, I hope you feel at home. Thanks for reading. Have a great day and go enjoy your neighborhood. It’s an extension of your home. Peace Out, World!!!

Small Freak Out + Reality Check = DBT Skills

Good Afternoon, World!! I was starting to freak out about my grandma still being in the hospital. Actually, I was freaking out when nobody was answering their phone and told by a nurse on the phone that my grandma’s nurse was dealing with an emergency. So, I thanked the nurse and called my great aunt. She gave me the reality check I needed and told me my grandma was okay. She then informed to do things that help me and asked me to tell her what I was going to do.

I informed my great aunt that I would blog about what I was going to do while listening to music. Than I would do some art and read. My great aunt suggest I play my flute. Or at least my grandma’s favorite song I know on the flute to feel close to my grandma till I talk to her on the phone.

So, I’m now doing my plan to help me get through a rough moment. Thank you for putting up with me. Have a wonderful day. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Happy February

Good Morning, World!!! Its a typical drizzly morning in Seattle. I woke up early so I could have a fresh hot breakfast on the table when he get home from a long 24-hour shift as a firefighter. I made him banana pancakes and scrambled eggs with hot chocolate. Junior was thrilled that I made him breakfast and even more thrilled that I didn’t burn the house down when I made him breakfast.

After breakfast Junior and I had quite the intimate moment. We made love to our favorite music. More or less we had sex to our “love songs” play list. Music that turns both of us on and has our love making time last a tad bit longer. It was very pleasurable  moment for the both of us.

After our intimate moment, Junior decided he is going to take a nap. As he is napping, I decided to blog. After blogging I tend to read. As many of you know I love reading and am enjoying the science fiction book I am reading.

I should get going as I want to get to reading my book. Have a great day everyone. Enjoy your lovely February and Peace Out, World!!!

A Day of Information

Good Morning, World!!! Today is a going to be a day of “information” for those of us that live in the United States. What I mean by that is that this evening is the State of the Union address. I rarely watch them because its the same bullshit every year.

Something that won’t be the same bullshit for me today is that I will be having a phone interview. I’ve never had a phone interview before and hope that I do well on the interview. It’s for a peer specialist job. I am looking forward to the future and have hope.

Having hope is a major deal for everyone especially for those who are in recovery. Recovery is something that is really important for me. Being in recovery no matter how tough it may be is well worth it. It means I’m living a life worth living.

Thank you for reading. Peace, Out World!!!

Poetry; Day Five: Imperfect

Untitled Poem

by Gertie

Looking at the their arms.

Arms that look like railroad tracks.

Arms that aren’t suppose to look like a railroad track but do.

Sadly the scars have others stare.

Fortunately, the scars have help with being an advocate

An advocate for those who have no voice.