Tag Archives: Meds

Boredom Sets In As I Wait For….

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! At this very moment I am sitting in the waiting room of my doctor’s office to see her for our ever two week check up even though I have not seen her since November. Long story short, our schedules didn’t mesh well and the holidays didn’t help with the scheduling. Any way I am sure we will be discussing how things have been going with me both physical health and mental health wise. I am sure we will also be discussing how I have not been using the emergency room on the regular basis and only going to urgent care once as seeing her every two weeks is to help cut down on the amount of times I go to the emergency room. Anyway, one of the things I plan on doing is asking my doctor if she can prescribe me some Ativan for my upcoming dental appointment. Actually, it will be for my oral surgery of taking out all of my teeth. I have anxiety over going to the dentist. I know it sounds a wee bit silly but I do. I know most likely my doctor will not prescribe me the Ativan but at least I will have an answer as if I don’t ask the answer will be an automatic no.

As I wait for my doctor, not only have I been writing this post I have been reading the book Lost Boys by Orson Scott Card. It has been quite helpful to me as I wait to see my doctor. Hell, it was quite helpful to me last night when I was unable to sleep due to sleeping too much for about three days due to depression. I love to read. It helps me get out of my own head space and think about something else for once. It is quite helpful for me and my recovery journey.

I best be ending this particular post as it is getting closer to my appointment time with my doctor. I hope to post more later on today. I hope everyone has a good Monday. Peace Out, World!!!

Lil Gertie’s Health Scare & Other Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I realize that I have not blogged since New Years Day. I don’t really have any excuses as I know I could have found time to blog. I do have some excuses for the evening of Friday the fourth till yesterday. I mention this as my cat, Lil Gertie, had two minute period to where she was struggling to breathe. I immediately took her to my vet who was out sick however the vet techs looked at her and said it would be a good idea to take her in to another walk in vet clinic which they referred me to. The vet techs sent over Lil Gertie’s records and I went to the referred vet clinic. There, Lil Gertie was checked and she has asthma. The vet put Lil Gertie on steroids, antibiotics and just in case a de-worming med. The vet put her on a de-worming med just in case she has parasites which she says it is extremely unlikely but precautionary especially since I would have seen worms in her stools. The vet said parasites could be the reason for Lil Gertie’s asthma but she highly things it is asthma that was aggravated by a respiratory illness is why she is on an antibiotic. Lil Gertie, is also on steroids to help with the inflammation due to asthma.  Taking Lil Gertie to the vet caused me a great deal of anxiety especially since she had another asthma attack right in front of the vet. Thankfully, I didn’t need to get x-rays done on Lil Gertie since she ended up having another episode of struggling to breathe. The vet said if she has another episode, that I might have to get her an inhaler for the asthma. Seeing Lil Gertie struggling to breathe is anxiety provoking. She does appear to be feeling better. She is upset with me because two of her meds are in liquid form and she doesn’t like to be held still to have some nasty tasting stuff being forced in her mouth. I know I wouldn’t like it.

Now on to my own health issues. First and fore most I made an appointment with an oral surgeon to get my teeth taken out. I will be getting dentures which is something I am not looking forward to but it is something that needs to be done desperately. I have high anxiety regarding dentist. Mainly because I am unable to see what the hell they are doing. But in reality I will feel better about myself once I get a new set of teeth which would be dentures.

Besides my dental issue, I too have been having some asthma attacks which highly sucks. It sucks even more that I think I am coming down with a cold or something like a could. I think I am just worn out and need some rest but I do have sore throat which is not a good thing. I have been drinking plenty of water and orange juice. I am trying to stay healthy especially since I have to make sure Lil Gertie gets healthy. I really do love my cat, Lil Gertie, cause I don’t know what I would do if she were not around.

Anyway, I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I am grateful that you read my blog. I don’t have much more to say. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Some Midnight Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is officially twelve midnight in my corner of the world. I am having trouble sleeping at the moment and am a little goofy at the moment due to my sleep medicine. I know my last two post was about my mental health appointments and I have a feeling that is where this post is going to go but I will attempt for it to not be one hundred percent about my mental health appointments.

I am just extremely please that my recovery is progressing well and in the direction that is positive. I am also grateful that my therapist and I came up with some great coping skills as well as some great self care strategies. Most have to deal with art. I love doing art.

Speaking of art, I have been doing some art since I am unable to sleep. I started of my coloring and then realized I wanted to do something a little be more creative. I then started to do a painting which is including some collaging. I am make this particular art work for my neighbor who lives across the hall from me. He has become a good friend to me. We both look out for each other and no it is not a romantic relationship.

I am really grateful for my therapist and how much he has helped me the last eight or so months. He has helped me practice some of my coping skills and has taught me some new coping skills. He has be one of the best therapist I have had.

I think I need to do some good self care by attempting to go back to bed so I can sleep. I hope everyone has a good night sleep. I would like to thank you once again for reading my blog as it is greatly appreciated. Have a goodnight everyone. Peace Out, World!!!

It Is Yet Another Monday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is another Monday which is the start of another work week. The last full work week before Christmas. This is the time of year where many people are under stress due to the holidays. It is also the time of year where many others who have mental health challenges it because that much more stressful and anxiety provoking especially when family is involved. It is my hope for the next eight days that everyone can be able to do some good self care as the Christmas holiday is coming quickly upon us.

The one thing I was hoping to do today was attend art group but unfortunately I have a dental appointment today and it was the only one available before the New Year so I took it. It is for the the dentist to take moldings of my teeth and after that I make an appointment to get my teeth pulled as they all need to be taken out. I however will wait till the new year to get my teeth pulled. I am not looking forward to it but if it will help me eat better to get better nutrition and feel better about myself then I will do it. I just really wanted to go to art group today as art group won’t happen on the 24th or  31st due to the fact that the group facilitators will be out of town.

After my dental appointment this afternoon, I am going shopping for Christmas gifts. I highly dislike shopping especially this time of year because everyone is so rude or at least the other shoppers appear to be rude. Another reason why I highly dislike shopping for gifts is because it always appears that the gifts I give are always returned or re-gifted. Which is why I tend to give cash or gift cards then that way the person receiving the gift can get what they want or need. Plus, then my family can’t argue that I spent more on one person than the other cause they can check the cash or the gift card to see how much it is.

But before I go to the dentist or shopping, I will be going to go get my meds. Meds that I really don’t like taking but do. I take them because I know they ultimately help me with my recovery. They are the primary reason for my recovery but are part of what helps with my recovery. Taking meds sucks but if they are helpful to my recovery then I will take them.

Before I get my meds I need to do some very basic self care stuff. I need to eat breakfast. I also need to take a shower as I haven’t taken a shower in about four days which means my depression symptoms are starting to increase. So doing basic self care items like eating, showering and evening making my bed are quite helpful for me in battling the symptoms of my mental health challenges.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. I hope everyone has a great Monday and most importantly a great work week. Again, thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Still Struggling This Monday Morning

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is still Monday morning in my corner of the world and unfortunately I am still struggling with depression symptoms which sucks shit. Since my last post and since I am still struggling I decided to email my therapist in hopes that he will call me at some point today to check in with me even though I have an appointment with him tomorrow (Tuesday) afternoon. My therapist is usually pretty good with checking in with me when I email and/or call him when I am struggling.

Since, it is only ten o’clock in the morning in my corner of the world and am waiting for my therapist to get back to me, I have managed to do some self care. The self care includes me cleaning out the cat’s litter box (yes, I know that is weird), taking a shower and getting me some food to eat. The shower was quite helpful as I had not taken a shower since Friday evening. I had left over pizza for breakfast.

Another thing I have done since my last post as I wait for my therapist to call me from the email I sent is I went and picked up my meds. I am still on weekly med pick ups and I hope when I see my psychiatric nurse practitioner next week that she will be willing put me back on monthly med pick ups. I am grateful that I don’t have to pick up my meds from my mental health agency and am even more grateful that they aren’t daily pick ups.

Now, I think I am going to spend time with my cat, Lil Gertie, as she has been attempting to get my attention as I have been writing this post. I love my cat very much. This is my first holiday season with her and I plan on spoiling her for Christmas. She is going to be receiving a lot of toys.

I don’t have much else to say in  this post. I want to thank you for reading as it is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I am grateful for each one of you for reading my blog.  Again, thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone continues to have a great Monday. I also hope everyone has a great work week. For those who celebrate Hanukkah, I hope your last days of your holiday are well celebrated. Peace Out, World!!!

Not Much To Say This Monday Afternoon

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I hope everyone’s day is going well. Mine is just going okay. Nothing too exciting has happened today. The only thing I have done so far today was pick up my meds. Meds that are much needed but I taking but I take them because they help me with my recovery.

I do have to go to work this evening for a stupid monthly meeting. I didn’t go to Octobers meeting because I didn’t know about it and Novembers meeting was cancelled. So, I guess what I am saying is that this my first meeting at my current job and have no idea what to expect. I really don’t want to go and have absolutely no clue how long it is going to last.

Hanukkah arrived yesterday evening and I celebrated it with a friend of mine. I was suppose to go to another friends to celebrate Hanukkah tonight but due to work I won’t celebrate it with my other friend till tomorrow. I am not Jewish but two of my friends invite me to celebrate with them both at least one of the eight nights. I do this because it’s a way to honor my friends faith. I may feel disappointed that I can not celebrate Hanukkah with one of my friends tonight but I am grateful that I can celebrate with her tomorrow.

I don’t have much more to say except Happy Hanukkah to those who celebrate it. I also want to thank you from the bottom from my heart for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Have a great rest of your Monday. Peace Out, World!!!

It Feels Like A Monday Because It is A Monday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It sure feels like a Monday. Yes, I realize it is Monday but it most definitely feels like Monday. It feels like a Manic Monday because of all the shit I have had to do today.

First I had to attend an appointment for my housing. It is for my annual review to continue on getting subsides housing. My rent is going up starting in February because of my job but I am okay with that.

Something else I had to do in regards to my job is fill out paper work for Social Security. I also had to send them my pay stubs. I really dislike paper work but I rather fill out the paper work and send in pay stubs than owe Social Security money.

As much as I hate paperwork I am glad I got it done for both my housing and my social security. As far as my job is concerned I am looking for a new one as being on call for a night shift is not exactly best for me and my mental health. I plan on actively looking now and start applying in hopes I can start in the New Year.

I also went out in the crappy Seattle weather to go get my meds. I wish I didn’t have to get my meds on the weekly basis but I do. The weather in Seattle sucks today. It has been raining and extremely windy. I just wish it was normal Seattle yucky weather which is overcast, cold and drizzly.

I don’t have much else to say. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is very much appreciated. I hope to post again sometime tomorrow to tell you how my doctors and therapy appointments went. Peace Out, World!!!

Just a Bullshit of Randomness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It is the Sunday after Thanksgiving and this year Thanksgiving was difficult for my family and I as it is the first holiday season with out my grandma. When my grandpa said the prayer before we ate dinner on Thanksgiving he broke down crying which led me to cry.

Speaking of grandpa, he had knee surgery a few weeks ago and right now, I am taking care of him as neither one of my uncles are able to do so at the moment due to them both having to work. It is nice to be able to help him as needed. It is also nice to spend some time with him in general as he is 88 years old. For being 88 years old he is relatively good health with the exception of his recent knee surgery.

Speaking of health, I did see my doctor nearly two weeks ago. She put me on on some antibiotics due to having an abscessed tooth. Unfortunately, I needed to go to the Emergency Room the next day to get my tooth taken out. Good thing the hospital I normally go to is a teaching hospital with a dental school. I see my doctor again this Tuesday as we have appointments every two weeks to help keep me out of the hospital for both physical and mental health.

Speaking of mental health I finally saw my psychiatric nurse practitioner as she kept cancelling due to family emergencies and a death in the family. She apologized profusely about the many cancellations however I was quite understanding of the reasons why. She and I discussed my mental health as well as my psych meds. I informed her overall my meds were working except the new sleeping med which she increased. We also discussed not being able to see my therapist due to him being out sick for three weeks. She informed me that if he wasn’t back the week after Thanksgiving to give her a call to see what she could do about me seeing someone on the interim bases.

Thankfully, I didn’t need to call my psychiatric nurse practitioner regarding as my therapist came back last week, the week of Thanksgiving. I was able to see my therapist the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. We discussed a great deal regarding him being gone, my grief regarding it being the first holidays without my grandma and the upcoming holidays and how difficult they are for me due to trauma. Since my therapist is back even though part time we are working on ways to help me get through them. So my next session we are going specifically working on self care tactics so I can stay out of the hospital for psych reasons including the Emergency Room.

As the holidays are upon us, I am thinking on what I am going to give my family for the holidays. I haven’t decided yet but I think I am going to give my dads side a picture of my grandma and my moms side some hand made gifts. I highly dislike giving things that will only be exchanged for something else or gifted out to someone else.

I don’t have much else to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that I have people who read my blog on the regular basis. To you I am the most grateful for. I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season even though I know it is challenging for many folks. I hope you all have a wonderful work week as well. Have good rest of your evening. Peace Out, World!!!

The Evening Before Thanksgiving

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Long time not blog. I can give you plenty of reasons why I haven’t posted in a while as well as plenty of excuses and have decided I won’t bore you with them. I’ll just go straight into what I am going to post about.

The last few weeks have been filled with anxiety. They have been filled with anxiety because my therapist was out of the office for three weeks due to health problems and finally came back this past Monday (11/19/2018). He still still didn’t look like he was feeling all that well when I saw him yesterday (Tuesday). But at least I was able to see him for a session without seeing him in almost a month. I had an extreme case of anxiety that my therapist wouldn’t becoming back due to health reason after what happened with Diana. Even though my therapist is back only part time due to his health issues, I am glad he is feeling well enough to be back. I just wish he was feeling back to his normal. But at least I will be seeing him weekly just as long as his doctors continue to say it is okay for him to work.

Another thing that has been causing me a great deal of stress for me is that my psychiatric nurse practitioner kept canceling on me due to a family emergency and a death in the family and I had ran out of refills for meds. But thankfully she refilled them before leaving to go to the funeral. I was finally able to see her last Thursday (November 15, 2018). She upped my new sleeping med and even with the increased, it still isn’t helping me fall asleep as quickly as I would like. At least the Melatonin appears to be helping me stay asleep.

Something else that I am not sure I have  mentioned but my regular doctor has been seeing me every two weeks as a precautionary thing to help me stay out of the Emergency Room (E.R) for both physical and mental health reasons. It appears to be helping. In my opinion it has been quite helpful.

Unfortunately, I did end up in the E.R last Wednesday (11/14/2018) due to an abscessed tooth. Thankfully, they were able to get the Dental Resident over from the Dental school to take care of the tooth and pull it. I am now on antibiotics for three weeks due to the severity of the infection.

On that note, I have been dealing with anxiety regarding the upcoming holidays. It is not just the anxiety I am dealing with in regards to the holidays, I have been dealing with the grief of this being the first holiday season without my grandma. I just wish the anxiety wasn’t so bad especially with the added grief. The one thing that has been quite helpful with the anxiety is my cat. She has been laying on my chest as I sit in my chair when I am high anxiety. She does this to help me focus on my breath. I find it quite helpful that she does this even though it hurts my boobs.

Well, I don’t have much more to say. Thank you so much for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things. I hope that I can post more often and not let things get in the way. Again, thank you so very much for reading my post. If I don’t post tomorrow, I want to wish everyone in the United States a very Happy Thanksgiving. Peace Out, World!!!

Monday Moodiness

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Right now, I am realizing that I have been moody most of the day. I have been moody for many reasons. My depression is acting up. My grief dealing with my grandma hit me like a tsunami today. Oh yeah and that weather sucks shit.

It doesn’t help things that I have been isolating myself today. Not sure why I am isolating today but I have. I did email my therapist and primary care doctor about the depression, grief and isolation. Both my doctor and therapist reminded me of my appointments with them tomorrow which I know will be quite helpful for me. My therapist also informed that I do have refills for my psych meds as he talked with the “shrink on duty.” So, at least I know I have meds for the next two weeks.

My cat, Lil Gertie, has been of great help to me today. She has been laying by my side on my share or laying on my lap. She even let me hold her for about ten minutes as I paced around my apartment. She usually only lets me hold her for about two to three minutes max. She is an awesome emotional support animal. Right now she is taking some “me time” by sleeping on my bed. Everyone needs some space at times and she has done a very good job with supporting me today so she deserves the “me time.”

I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated. Knowing that I have perfect strangers that care about me and that I am able to help by sharing my story helps me get through tough days like today. I hope everyone has a good rest of your Monday. Enjoy your week with whatever you are doing. Peace Out, World!!!