Tag Archives: Recovery

Plans to Make a Better Future

Posted on by Gertie

Right now I have a lot of desires to improve my life. Of course my cat Billie Dean helps improve my life. I love him so very much. I know he loves me very much as well. He has kept me stable the last two and half years. I love him so much and wish his dental work wasn’t so expensive.

I am also teaching myself tarot card in hopes it will give me a better direction in my life. I also have a tarot journal to help with it creating a life worth living. A life worth living is something I desire.

Therapy helps build a life worth living as long as doing self help books. I just want to be come a better self even if therapy and self help books are helpful.

Another thing that helps me is applying for jobs a reading. I hope to get a lot done next week. I don’ have much more to say except thank you for reading my blog. it it greatly appreciated from my end of things. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World and have an awesome weekend.

Updates on Billie & Internet Issues

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, World!!! First and fore most I took this entire week off of work due to stomach flu as well as mental health stuff. Well all expect yesterday when I took the day off to take Billie to the vet to get some major dental work done Plus I had therapy yesterday as well. I would have told you sooner but my home internet is having some issues. So I am spending time with my family and their internet. I hope to update with you about my new job when my home internet is fixed. I hope everyone has a great Friday and Peace Out World!!!!

Developing Your Eye; Day 8: Treasure

Posted on by Gertie
My teddy bear that I’ve had since the day I was born or so I’m told

Treasure can mean different things to different people. For instance I have what I call many treasures including my cat Billie and having a place to call home. But for today, the treasure I’ve decided to feature for this assignment is my teddy bear. In fact my uncle got him for me the day I was born or at least that is way the story goes. Considering, that he needs to be stuffed again and have his arm sewn back together at this very moment, I believe the story. The picture in this post just shows the Teddy wasn’t in dire need of being put back together. I call my teddy bear; Teddy or Ted. My family says it’s time to put him in retirement and let him watch over me as I sleep while he sits on the dresser. I agree but I’ve been sleeping with this stuffed animal for my entire life and it’s hard to give up. Teddy has been pretty much everywhere with me except when I went to camp as a preteen and teenager. So, Teddy is a treasure that has seen it all with me; the good, the bad and the ugly and lets not forget he has seen me in my recovery process. Since he has been with me my entire life that is why I chose him to be my featured treasure.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 17: A Map As Your Muse

Posted on by Gertie

Well, whenever it comes to a map as your muse assignment, I don’t use the “typical map” as it doesn’t seem very interesting to me so I find maps such as above the focuses on a topic and doesn’t use the “typical” map style. I chose one on affirmations because they seem to help me with my recovery especially now that I am dealing with imposter syndrome due to the new job.

In fact this particular map has me inspired to look over my affirmation and say a few out loud. I might even a new affirmations to my list. I hope this inspires to continue and/or create affirmations to say on the daily basis.

Anxiety Increasing as Tomorrow Gets Closer

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! My anxiety is increasing as tomorrow gets closer. Even though I’ve had my first week of work it was mostly done remotely or in person with the HR and IT departments which is at different location that I will be working at. See tomorrow in my first day at my job site and I am nervous as fucking hell. I know it is okay to be nervous but not just anxious about my first day at my job site.

I am nervous about having to take public transportation again. The last two years I’ve been either working from home or taking Lyft to and from work due to Covid-19 as I was trying to limit the amount of exposure I could get. I’m not so worried about the exposure as much due to having the vaccine, the booster and actually being diagnosed with Covid-19 the day after I got the booster. Covid suck shit and I know there is a possibility of getting it again but that is not why I’m worried about using public transportation. I’m nervous because, I’ll be taking a route I’ve never taken before. I’m nervous because even on routes, I am familiar with, there are times I have to get off due anxiety and/or PTSD issues and would have to wait for the next bus so I could be in a better head space to be back on the bus. I know everything will be fine but I’m still anxious about it. I just to get use to public transportation again as well as a new route to me.

When I get home from work tomorrow I am sure my cat Billie dean will be more than happy that I am home. Hell, Billie is always happy when I get home even if it is for five minutes for checking my mail or taking out the garbage. I’m more than certain that I will be just as happy to be home as my cat will be.

I do not have much else to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, once again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Do Food Handlers permit class and test

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (First day at actual job site)
  • Spend time with Billie when I arrive home

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work from home as I have online training
  • Dinner with neighbors who are friends

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Spend time with Billie when I get home from work
  • Attend an online 12 step group

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Spend time with Billie after I get home from work

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Work (at job site)
  • Dinner with a friend
  • Get home and spend time with Billie

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Spend day at grandpa’s house
  • Do laundry while at grandpa’s
  • Make grandpa dinner while at his place

Up Before the Butt Crack of Dawn

Posted on by Gertie

Good Sunday Morning, World from Seattle, Washington, USA. It is two o seven in the morning as I start this lovely post. I would rather be sleeping soundly like my cat Billie Dean is right now.. In fact he is snoring. Snoring is normal for him.

Lets start why I’m probably up before the but crack of dawn which would be work tomorrow (Monday). I go into my work site for the first time I go into my actual job site and I have anxiety over it. Not sure why but I think it’s because I want to do a good job at what I do and proof my supervisor and myself that I can do the job.

On that note, I will be volunteering at PAWS Cat City later this morning and am proud to say that Boris got adopted Friday morning. If he wasn’t FIV positive and more lovey dovey than my Billie Boy I would have add him to the family.

My other plans to do today is to do a math workbook to freshen up on my math skills. I also plan on doing a mindfulness workbook to help me with being more mindful of the moment and maybe start a mindfulness group at work if it’s the type of recovery work I can do at the Triage center. I’m also going to work on a workbook specifically for mental health recovery.

As part of my self care besides volunteering at PAWS Cat City, I’ll do some art work by coloring. And of course spending time with my cat Billie.

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! It’s been a long week. It’s been a long week. It started with me volunteering on Sunday as I normally do. We were slammed due to it being “kitten season.” The place I volunteer at has a super sweet lovable senior kitty who surprisingly hasn’t been adopted yet.

Then I started my job on Monday. It’s been a week full of training and my brain hurts from everything I learned this past week. Best part was having yesterday (Friday) off so I did an extra volunteer shift. I love me some kitten time but I love my Billie so much.

Then today I took a training to get certified in First Aid and CPR which is required by my employer. I had to pay for the training but I’m okay with that especially since it included AED training. To find out, I will get a “few cent raise” for the AED training or so I’m told. Weather or not I get the raise having all three certifications will help make me more employable.

All I need to do now is get my food handler’s permit and I am all set in what I need which will be easy to attain since I needed one for working at Safeway. On that note I just realized I need to show proof on auto insurance but since I don’t have a car I don’t have any. I still might have to get it if I’m required to drive a company car but if that is the case then I get to use auto insurance for tax purpose’s then.

Have a great rest of your weekend and Peace Out, World!!!

Happy Friday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am off from work today yet I woke up at five o’clock in the morning. Wish I could have slept longer but the sleep I got was restful. It’s always a good thing to get restful sleep.

Since I was up so early a neighbor of mine who is a good friend goes out to breakfast every Friday so I asked if I could join him for breakfast. He said yes so we went out to breakfast. I had biscuits and gravy while my friend had was is called the Seattle omelet. It was cool hanging out with this friend.

Since I don’t have anything to do today since I don’t have to work; I signed up for an extra volunteer shift at PAWS Cat City. So I will be volunteering for a few hours today. I love volunteering and seeing cats get their furrever home.

On that note I’ve been doing some art work since waking up as well as after breakfast with a friend. I’ve been coloring the poster for my mom. In fact I plan on coloring after my volunteer job as well. I love doing art work.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you all for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great weekend ahead. Happy Friday and Peace Out, World!!!

The Healing Love of the Cats of My Recent Life

Posted on by Gertie

Lil Gertie the first cat that captured my heart as an adult. She was only 8 when she crossed over the rainbow bridge, I would still adopt her even only having a year an half with her.

Lil Gertie wasn’t exactly the type of cat I would looking for. I go into wanting a black cat knowing the realities I might not connect with a black cat. Anyway, after filling out the survey, I talked with a volunteer who I know from his place of work. He said we have a cat who needs to be an only cat. She is all white and the two of you share the same name. Then he explained to me about her ear issues and fell in love with out looking at her. So I decided to not put her on hold as I wasn’t sure at the moment and wanted a couple days to think about while still giving her a chance of being adopted sooner as I made my decision. So two days later I made my decision to adopt Lil Gertie. Sadly she got cancer and ended up having a mini stroke. It was the best choice to let her cross over even I only had a year and have with her. She got her furrever home and helped with some hard shit like the the first holiday season without my grandma as well as the first Mother’s day with my grandma. She was also there during the first anniversary of my grandma’s death. As much as I miss Lil Gertie, her untimely death helped me put into action becoming a volunteer at PAWS Cat City in Seattle.

I now volunteer there and started January of 2020 so we continued volunteer through mid-March. Volunteers were furghloaded till June were a hand full off us could start back up and I was one of the first to start volunteer again.

Billie wanting to take a shower with ne when he realize he didn’t lie it;’

I was very lucky when I adopted him because it was right before the lock down from Covid and he helped me through the initial part of isolating and not go to big gatherings like I was planning on going to. Billie was the on constant in my life during Covid-19 pandemic. In fact he has helped me be more mindful in my life and realized he has now ended two jobs with me and started two new jobs one of which I started this week. Billie helped me realize that working nights once a week and an occasional on call shift was not for me so I got a job as a full time Peer Specialist at an agency that treated me like family. Sadly after being there for a year and half the agency permanently closed its doors. Staff found out March 1st of this year and I didn’t find out my lay off date till two weeks before hand. My last day was June 3rd. Billie was and is my calming affect through all the recent work stuff. If I didn’t have my loving Billie on June 3rd, I don’t think I would have lived much less continue to want to work. Billie’s unconditional love is what got me through a very dark time that I hadn’t had in four years. The Healing affect of Billie helped me get back on track and I started a new job this week as peer.

Both of my cats have healed me in ways with their love that human could not do. My cats are family to me even the ones I help take care of at my volunteer job at Cat City. Thank you for listening to me babble on about my cats. Peace Out, World and go pet a cat.