Tag Archives: Depression

Feeling Meh

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am feeling a little meh. I’m not sure why but I am. Yesterday was a good day. I guess waking up feeling meh is having me vigilant on how my mood is going to be throughout the day.

Being aware of my emotions is something I have learned throughout my recovery. Being aware of my emotions helps me know what skills or tools I need to use to get through. I think today is going to be one of those days where using my skill is going be essential to how I react to whatever comes up.

Today, I think I am going to lay low as it appears that I am on edge due to feeling meh. Part of what I am going to do is do my DBT homework. Doing my DBT homework will help me put myself into wise mind. Being in wise mind will help me make good decisions.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Let’s Get Fucking Real

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Over all it has been a good morning. As good as this morning has been I am angry. This anger has lead me to write this post. I am fucking going to get real here.

I don’t fucking understand why that only time America discusses mental health and suicide is when a mass shooting happens or when a celebrity dies by suicide? Why in the fucking hell does the media wait to something tragic happens. The month of May is mental health awareness month and not one news station in my area discussed mental health unless there was a school shooting involved.

We as not just a country but the world need to discuss more about mental health and suicide. We need to lessen the stigma that goes with it yet nothing is being done. I share bits and pieces of me here on my blog. I have emailed my politicians and local news stations yet nobody appears to give a rats ass till something tragic happens.

So, here I am sitting at my laptop attempting to lessen the stigma of getting help with a mental health challenge and/or suicidal thoughts or actions. I want people around the world that you are not alone in this battle. It is not an easy feat to battle depression or anxiety or any other mental health condition or suicidal thoughts however if you seek out help from people it can and will get better. I’m not going to lie and say its always going to be peachy keen when you get help and get better but you will have the skills to help you when things to get bad again.

The National Suicide Hotline number here in America is 1-800-273-8255. I don’t know Suicide hotline number for other countries or I would be giving those out as well. Please if you are struggling with your mental health and/or suicide please reach out to someone.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

The Elephant In The Room

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am awake at three o’clock in the morning due to not being able to sleep. Both my insomnia and depression are acting up. Not sure why either are acting up but they are.

When I started to write this post I didn’t know what I was going to write about. So lets discuss the elephant in the room; the two celebrities who died by suicide, Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. Many people are mourning their sudden and untimely deaths. People are grieving over this and I don’t blame them as it is sad news.

As sad as it is to hear about someone’s death especially when it is death by suicide people start to discuss it a little bit more. I personally think we need to talk about both suicide and mental health conditions more so we can lessen the stigma that goes with it.

If anyone is in crisis and needs to talk the United States National Suicide Hotline is 1-800-273-8255. I know this number will work in the United States however I am unsure about the rest of the world. I wish I had other crisis numbers for other countries however I do not. Please if you are in a mental health crisis or thinking of killing yourself don’t hesitate to reach out to someone.

Thank you for reading!!! Peace Out, World!!!

Good Morning, World

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I woke up in a depressive state.  A state that I can get out of by the time DBT group happens at one in the afternoon. I am also having some pretty high anxiety at the moment. Anxiety and depression I don’t know why I am having. I have a theory or two but at this point in time I am attempting to do what I need to do to focus on getting out of this anxious and depressive mood.

I’ll hopefully be able to check-in with my therapist today as I think I will  need one due to the anxiety and the depression I am dealing with. I think I am dealing with them due to not getting very much sleep last night. Not sure why I didn’t get very much sleep but that is one of my theories about the anxiety and depression. Checking in with my therapist is something that will help me with this as I want to act effectively when I go to group.

I am looking forward attending DBT group as I am done with my homework. We had to do a chain analysis as well as a diary card. The diary card is no big deal but the chain analysis was the difficult part of the homework. I discussed it with my therapist and he admits it is a difficult part of my homework for the week.

Thank you for reading. Have a great Friday. Peace Out, World!!!

Getting Ready For The Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! As I sit here writing this post at my laptop, I am figuring out what I need to for the day as I see my therapist. I want to make sure I take what I need on things I want to show him as well as discuss with him. He appreciates when I bring things in to discuss. An example or two is art work, poetry and even my scrap book. Showing him these things brings on conversations. Conversations that helps my therapist get to know me better as he is still new to me. Conversations that also bring out things that I need discuss and that is important in my recovery. One thing we will be discussing for sure is my depression. Depression that appears to want to go away but still sticking around.

I am not sure what I am going to do after my therapy appointment. That is yet to be determined but I have some idea’s. Ideas I have is come home and just chill. While another idea is to hang out with friends. I like the idea of coming home and hanging out with my cat but that means I will be isolating. Isolation is never good for me.  I think I might go to a peer run group at a peer run agency that is fully funded by grants.

I should get going and eat breakfast. Have a great day. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Afternoon Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! I am sitting here at day treatment bored half out of my mind. I did get my hair cut which is a good thing. It feels more like a summer cut now.

I am looking forward to what this summer has to bring. Summer is my favorite time of year. The sunny weather actually helps with my depression. I just love the fact that the days are longer and it is warmer outside.

My interview yesterday went extremely well. It went so well that I think I might be getting the part time position. I hope I do get as I miss working a great deal. I miss the clients and being able to be of help to others.

My depression has been acting up and I am just ready for it go the fuck away. Sorry but not sorry for the cussing as it is the best way describe how I feel about the depression. Depression sucks shit but that is why I have skills to help me through the depression.

I am going to get going as other people in day treatment want to use the computer and I have a laptop at home I can use. As always, thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Lil Gertie, My Lil Fur Baby

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am enjoying the fact that I am a cat parent. Lil Gertie is quite entertaining. When she is not eating or napping she is at my side purring. She has been following me around like a lost little puppy when I am up moving around. Lil Gertie even sits at the door till I get home.

I am looking forward to telling my therapist about Lil Gertie tomorrow. I emailed him about her already and sent some pictures of her to him as well. I am so grateful that I got Lil Gertie as it has she has decreased my symptoms of my mental health diagnoses so soon after getting her. She is doing what she is suppose to be doing.

I need to get going. I am hungry and need to eat. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Meet Lil Gertie

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I like to introduce you to Lil Gertie. We share the same name. Hence the reason she is Lil Gertie. IMG_0354

The above picture is Lil Gertie sitting among my puzzle pieces. I think she wants to help me do my puzzle.

IMG_0355 The above picture is Lil Gertie standing by my chair contemplating something.

IMG_0357The above picture is Lil Gertie laying on my chair. Looks like she found her favorite spot which happens to be mine. She is perfect for me.

For my sight impaired readers Lil Gertie is a white short haired mixed breed domestic cat. She loves to purr.

Thank you for reading everyone. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Getting Excited

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am getting excited as I am planning on getting a cat today. The cat will be an Emotional Support Animal (ESA). Getting an ESA will help reduce the symptoms of my Anxiety, Depression and PTSD.

Having an animal of any kind has been proven to be helpful to reduce people’s symptoms’s of their mental health diagnosis. This is why my therapist has suggested and supported me getting an ESA. I can’t wait to tell him tomorrow about it as well as during our session on Tuesday.

Before I get the cat I have to go to the pet store and get more supplies for my new kitty. I already have food and litter. I just need a litter box, treats and toys. I also need to get a carrier for the cat.

I need to get going as I the excitement as I write this is getting overwhelming for me. Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Too Excited To Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am too excited to sleep as I get my cat later today. My cat is going to be an emotional support animal. I am hoping that the one I fell in love with on Friday is still up for adoption.

The cat is help me with the symptoms of both the Depression and the PTSD. I emailed my therapist telling him about it. I am sure he is going to be happy to hear about that I will be helping myself with getting a cat for my symptoms.

Thank you for reading and Peace out, World!!!