Poetry; Day Four: Journey

The Journey of Recovery

by Gertie

Recovery is a path.

A path that is journey.

A journey that has valley’s as deep as Death Valley.

Peeks so high that its like you are looking down from the peek of Mount Everest.

The journey isn’t always deep or high its sometimes flat and boring or even like a rollercoaster that goes upside and backwards.

The journey of recovery isn’t meant to be flat and easy but its well worth it.

It’s worth it to have a life worth living, whatever that looks like to you.

Weekly Plans

Good Morning, World!!! As I sit here starting this post, I realize that I forgot to do my weekly check-in yesterday. I’m disapointed that I didn’t do it like I said I would however I’ve also been blogging more on the regular basis that you a well aware of what my week was like. So my plans for the week are as follows:

Sunday:

  • Blog which is obvious as this is my third post of the day. I also plan to blog my poem for the intro to poetry course later on today.
  • Art. I plan on doing some painting. I plan on painting something for my case manager.
  • Read. Pretty self explanitory.
  • Clean my apartment
  • Workbook

Monday:

  • Blog. This is the day where not only will posting my poem for the intro to poetry course but start the weekly fictional writing prompt. I’ll be doing the writing prompt every Monday.
  • Attend Knitting Group
  • Attend Art Group
  • See my case manager
  • See temporary therapist, Gilbert
  • Read
  • Workbook

Tuesday:

  • Phone Interview
  • Read
  • Clean apartment
  • Art
  • Blog
  • Workbook

Wednesday:

  • Go to clubhouse
  • See temporary therapist, Gilbert
  • Art
  • Read
  • Clean apartment
  • Blog
  • Workbook

Thursday:

  • Go to social security office
  • Pay bills
  • Clean apartment
  • Blog
  • Art
  • Workbook
  • Read

Friday:

  • See temperary therapist, Gilbert
  • Blog. This particular post will be Fun Facts Friday
  • Art
  • Clean Apartment
  • Read
  • Workbook

Saturday:

  • Blog; Weekly check-in
  • Volunteer
  • Read
  • Workbook
  • Art

Thank you for reading my long boring post about my week to come. As you can tell I’m cleaning my apartment a lot. Its because its a disaster area. I tend to not keep up household chores when my depression gets bad. I plan on spening about 15 minutes a day to clean so I don’t get overwhelmed.

Thank you again for reading my blog. Its apreciated. Peace Out, World!!!

Addicted to Reading, Stuffed Animals & Not Being Able To Sleep

IMG_0245Good Morning, World!! I am finding myself wide awake just barely after three o’clock in the morning in my neck of the woods. I’m finding myself getting addicted to reading. It’s getting in the way of me sleeping at night.

Actually, I find myself reading when my insomnia is acting up and unable to sleep. The problem comes in is when I get tired and continue reading in bed. I know I should put down my book when I start getting tired however it’s difficult to do so when the book is a good read especially when I’m surrounded by my many stuffed animals.

I love being surrounded by so many stuffed animals because it helps me self-soothe when times become difficult. Difficult enough to need to hold on to one or more of them to help me. Help enough to get back to reading or whatever I might be doing at the moment. That’s why I carry a stuffed animal in my backpack when I go out and about.

Good thing its Sunday and I have nowhere to be today as I’ve been up since eight o’clock yesterday (Saturday) morning. Maybe I should get going and try to go to bed to see if I am able to sleep. If I am unable to do so, I’ll be reading once again. Its time to cuddle up with my stuffed animals. Have a good Sunday. Peace Out, World!!!

Humor To End The Night

Hello, World!!! It’s the middle of the night in my neck of the woods. Today has been quite relaxing and peaceful for both Junior and I. Junior and I had a good day.

Junior and I both read the books we are reading. If you have been reading my blog on the regular basis you know I’ve been reading Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb. I am loving the book to pieces as Junior is enjoying the book he is reading. He is reading Enders Game by Orson Scott Card again. It’s his favorite book.

Junior and I have had several intimate moments today. Yes that means we had sex. Its nice to finally be able to have intimate moments with Junior. It shows that the symptoms of my mental health challenges are improving.

Junior and I ended the night with humor. We watched Saturday Night Live (SNL) and laughed our asses off. Its always nice to end the night with humor. Now we are going to go to bed. Have a wonderful nights sleep!!! Good night, World!!!

Nice Relaxing Day, Thus Far

Good Afternoon, World!!! Its been a nice relaxing day, thus far. I’ve been reading most of the day. I’ve either been reading Wonder Woman comic books or Ship of Magic. It appears that I have some form of addiction to reading as of lately. Maybe its because I’ve been struggling so badly the last year that reading has been a challenge for me and now that things are improving; I’m taking full advantage of reading.

As much as I have been reading today, I have done other things as well. Junior and I have worked on the Wonder Woman puzzle I got for Christmas that my brother Jay got me. Anyone who knows me know that I love Wonder Woman and jigsaw puzzles.

As I continued working on the puzzle Junior made an awesome Mexican dish he learned from his grandma. Junior is second generation born Mexican American on both his mother’s and father’s side. The Mexican dish we had was amazing and we have enough left over for dinner tonight and lunch tomorrow.

Now that we are done cleaning up after a late lunch Junior and I are going to watch movies for the rest of the day. We are going to watch Wonder Woman first. Then we are going to watch Suicide Squad. Both movies Junior and I love both movies and are looking forward to watching them.

I should get going so I can watch the movies with Junior. I hope every has a great Saturday. Enjoy the rest of your weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Poetry; Day Three: Friends

Friends

by Gertie

Friends become family. A chosen family

Rare as it is, some even risk their own life for you.

It never ceases to amaze how close chosen family be.

Even thought there are an argument or two,

Nothing can get between our chosen family.

Dependability is something that is always counted on when times get bad.

So here’s to those friends who have become family.

 

 

A Tough Morning Turning Into A Relaxing One

Good Morning, World!!! I woke up this morning with an increase in my Depression and PTSD. When I realized this I realized what I needed to do. I needed to start my morning routine instead of just laying around.

So, I made some tea, read the news paper, had a bowl of cereal and took my meds. As always the news paper had nothing but bad news in it. I would like to be able to read some positive or heartwarming stories more often. I know of course I’m not the only one who feels like this.

After my morning routine I decided to read some comic books. Specifically, I read Wonder Woman comic books. I spent about an hour reading about a dozen Wonder Woman comic books. I’ve been collecting Wonder Woman comics since I was about six years old.

After reading Wonder Woman comics I decided to read Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb. I am really enjoying this book. When I am finished with this book I am looking forward to reading the second book in the series. Below is yet another picture of the book I am reading with two of my stuffed animals.

IMG_0247Well I think I’m going to get going and get back to reading. Have a great day everyone and Peace Out, World!!!

Needing Consistency W/My Mental Health Treatment Team

Good Afternoon, World!!! I’m a little sad as I’m having yet another change in my treatment team. It involves one of my DBT Group leaders is leaving. She was one of the biggest supports I had right after Diana left suddenly due to a life threatening illness. So it came to a shock to me when the female group leader said she was leaving. I am feeling sad. This makes the fourteenth change in my treatment team in as many months. As much as I am sad I know this group leader is going to make sure I have a goodbye with her.

Even though she is not a clinician who works with me a good portion of the time she has worked with me a great deal. That is why she is wanting to have a half an hour goodbye session with her. She say and I quote “You deserve goodbye from me. We have always had a good rapport and you deserve to have a goodbye and proper goodbye” unquote. I’m glad I’m having a goodbye with her.

I just want to have some consistency in my treatment team and not have so many changes in as many months. Realizing I was getting upset with the lack of consistency I decided to do a mindfulness exercise using the Calm app as I was on the bus home. After the mindfulness exercise I listened to music. So more or I used my DBT skills to help me not be so upset and/or angry with the inconsistency in my mental health treatment which helped reduced the urges to self-harm. So I am proud of myself for reducing my anger and self harm urges by using skills.

Thank you for reading about my not so good news. I am truly proud of myself for using my DBT skills. Peace Out, World!!!

Poetry; Day Two: Faces

Monster’s Eyes Within The Face

by Gertie

Face’s amongst us.

Look at their face and you can not tell.

Look into their eyes.

Look deep into their eyes and you can tell there is a monster within them.

A monster that may have hurt me but helped me.

Helped me by making me stronger despite them trying to make me weak.

 

A Lot on My Mind

Good Moring (again), World!!! I have a lot on my mind. Some of it has to do with blogging, while some of it has to do with other aspects of my life. The two kind of go hand and hand as my blog has a lot to do with me writing about my struggles and triumphs of my life.

I’ve been thinking on how I can get more people reading and/or following my blog. Some of it means that I have to put more effort into reading the post of the blogs I follow. If that means scheduling a time do so then I am more than willing to do so. The reason for me to start reading the blogs I follow is to like post and commenting on them. I have found that if I comment and/or like post I tend to get more traffic even if I don’t post on my blog that day. Another way is to get more traffic on my blog is tags. I’ve notice quite frequently that if I use tags I normally don’t use I tend to get more traffic. Tags appear to help a great deal. I know that is how I started following many of the blogs I currently follow. I also realized a long time ago is that if I post a picture on my blog post I get more traffic. That’s why I make every effort to read post without pictures. Not everyone has the luxury to post pictures for whatever reason. Another way that I’m trying to increase my traffic is to do free courses WordPress has to offer. Plus having a guest blogger will be helpful as well as me having a schedule on when I blog. I have found that if I blog on a regular basis folks tend to keep their interest more.

My mind is also reeling because of mental health symptoms. Specifically PTSD symptoms. Having flashbacks and body memories are not my idea of fun. Having both of these symptoms at the same time makes it feel like the trauma is happening all over again.

Something that helps me with the symptoms of PTSD is reading. I love to read especially book series as I hate to say good bye to characters. Yes, I know the characters are fictional but you can help but they become part of your life even for a short while. The book I am reading is by Robbin Hobb and is the first of a trilogy; Ship of Magic. I highly recommend it. The picture bellow is a picture of it as well as stuffed elephant a friend made me:

IMG_0244Thank you for reading this post. A post full of woes. Its much appreciated. Have a wonderful day. Happy Friday. Peace Out, World!!!