Nothing but Just a Bunch of Rambling

Good Afternoon, World!!! First and fore most I am having anxiety as Social Security informed me that I am “no longer disabled” and are discontinuing money that I worked hard for. They are also telling me I owe them money when I told them of the over-payment to begin with. I am having really high anxiety over this yet I can not do anything about it till I go into the office about it. I plan on going on Monday as I am sure tomorrow will be busy as it is the day after everyone gets paid. I may have anxiety over it but there is nothing I can really do right now.

I am also really sad right now because I am missing my grandma. I miss her and I know she would tell me everything is going to work out. I just have to remember that. I know she is watching over me and will want me to not worry about the Social Security.

The one thing that is helping is helping is something I just got from Amazon which is a weighted blanket. It is helping with everything that is going on for me at the moment. I am sweating by the weighted blanket. It is quite helpful.

I also saw my therapist today. I discussed with him my social security issue and he is going to help me the best he is able to do. I then checked in with him about a half an hour ago to inform him about how the weighted blanket is being of major help and how I wasn’t expecting till tomorrow. He really wants to help me the best he way is able to do so.

Thank you so for reading my blog. It mean the world!!! Peace Out, World!!!

A Happy Little Post

Good Morning, World!!! I am sitting here trying to figure out what to blog about. I did finally get some sleep last night. I actually got five hours of sleep and for me that is a lot of sleep. I am not complaining about it as I am thrilled about it.

My anxiety isn’t as bad as it has been and I think it has something to do with the sleep I got last night. Not having as much anxiety has me thrilled as well.

That is my happy little post. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Wednesday Afternoon Rambilings

Hello, World!!! As, I mentioned in my last post I went out to lunch with some friends. Spending time with friends helped my anxiety a great deal. I am beyond grateful that spending time with friends helped me and my anxiety.

After coming home from lunch I attempted to take a nap due to not getting sleep last night. I, unfortunately, was unable to sleep due to the fire alarm going off again. This time it wasn’t a false alarm like it normally is. Someone had a grease fire from cooking. Not sure what they were cooking but I am sure it is not edible now.

Now, I am going to reading one of the books I am reading. A book that I am enjoying immensely. I encourage you to read Ship of Magic by Robin Hobb.

Have a great afternoon. Thank you for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!

Fighting Off High Anxiety

Good Morning, World!!! I am have some high anxiety again. Anxiety that appears to come and go as it pleases. I just don’t understand why it is so high lately. I think part of my high anxiety today is due to not sleeping. Having no sleep adds to my symptoms of the mental health diagnosis I struggle with.

I think I am going to be working on one of my workbooks. I am not sure which one yet but I will be working on one of them. They appear to be helping me in multiple ways. They are helping me better myself.

Another thing that has been quite helpful as of lately is reading. I am really enjoying the books I am reading. Yes, I am reading multiple books. I am enjoying them immensely.

Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Wanting The Oh So Elusive Sleep

Good Morning, World!!! It is now five thirty in the morning for me. I still haven’t gotten any sleep. Sleep that I am desperately wanting and needing. I finally took some Ambien and it didn’t fucking work. It usually does and it is frustrating the hell out of me that I can not get some fucking sleep.

I am so frustrated that it is putting me in crisis mode. Enough of a crisis mode that once I am done blogging, I am going to take myself to the Emergency Room (E.R). I will be okay, I just need someone to fucking hear me on how fucking frustrating getting no sleep is. Right now I think going to the E.R is the best bet. I don’t want to concern you all. I just wanted to let you know what is going on. I know I will be okay, I just need to get the sleep thing taken care of.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Is It Too Much To Ask For Sleep

Good Morning, World!!! It is three o’clock in the morning and I haven’t been to sleep yet. I have been keeping myself busy by reading. Reading appears to be of help to me. Especially on nights where I am unable to sleep. Reading is so much more fun than watching middle of the night television. Television that is nothing but infomercials.

I have also been working on my workbook. A workbook that is geared toward folks with insomnia who struggle with depression and anxiety. I am only on the first chapter but so far I am finding it helpful.

I am grateful that I have the abilities to help myself through not being able to sleep. Yes, insomnia suck shit but I am able to help myself. I am able to help myself by reading, doing workbooks, blogging and other such things.

Thanks for reading. I hope to be able to get some sort of sleep. Have a great morning even if it is still the middle of the night for you. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Almost a Peaceful May Day

Hello, World!!! Well, the protest made it to my neighborhood. There is major property damage in near by businesses. I don’t understand why people think it is okay to do property damage. How is their agenda going to be heard with violence. I know I don’t hear their message. They even damaged a local veterinary clinic. What kind of person does that?

Other than being pissed protesters did property damage, I am doing okay. Yes, I am still having some anxiety issue but they are not as severe as yesterday. I highly dislike having anxiety yet I have learned from the anxiety. Learned that I need to persevere through it.

Thanks for reading. Have a great night. Peace Out, World!!!

I Should Be In My Job Interview

Good Afternoon, World!!! As this is posting I should be in my interview. My interview is suppose to start at twelve noon and I am unsure if my interview started on time. I say this as I scheduled this post.

When I wrote this post I was (or am) writing to help with some anxiety. Anxiety that is related to the job interview. I know it is normal to have anxiety when dealing with a job interview. I do not think I know anyone who doesn’t have some anxiety with job interview anxiety.

Thank you for reading!!! Peace Out, World!!!

Pre-Interview Anxiety

Good Morning, World!!! My anxiety has subsided a great deal from this time yesterday. Do I still have anxiety at this moment? Yes, I do except I am pretty sure it is not left over from yesterday.

I am pretty sure it is not left over from yesterday because I am have a job interview today. So, the anxiety I am feeling at the moment has a lot to deal with the job interview and nothing to do yesterday.

Something that has been quite helpful since I got up this morning has been music. Listening to music has proven helpful to me as it reduces stress, anxiety and blood pressure in me. I was part of a study to see how music can be of help to peoples mental health and they found it lowered my anxiety, depression and the plus part of it all, my blood pressure. My blood pressure doesn’t need to get any lower as it is naturally low any way.

Thank you for reading. I am most likely going to blog at least once more before my interview. Peace Out, World!!!

 

Anxiety That Won’t Go Away

Good Evening, World!!! As I mentioned in an earlier post I didn’t see my therapist today for our session due to anxiety. We did reschedule our appointment for Thursday. He has checked up on me twice today to make I am doing okay. Yes, I am doing okay. Or better than I was.

Better than I was earlier especially since my budget is better than I thought it was going to be. I forgot to include my tax refund I got in my budget.

Even though I had anxiety over my budget my therapist and I figured out that I was having anxiety due to PTSD symptoms. Symptoms that don’t help with my general anxiety symptoms. Symptoms I wish were subsiding but they are not so much.

Thank you so much for reading. Peace Out, World!!!