Tag Archives: Friends

Early Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is 3:33 in the morning in my neck of the woods. Yes, I realize it is early but at least I got some sleep. I think I got about four hours of sleep. I, did however wake up from a nightmare. A nightmare that scared the shit out of me but thankfully I was able to get the support I needed from a friend.

After talking to my friend, I am now blogging. Pretty much I am blogging about whatever comes to mind at the moment. Hence the reason why my title is what it is.

As mentioned in a previous post, I checked in with my therapist yesterday (Friday). We discussed what I am going to do this weekend. I told him I don’t have much going except cleaning my apartment later on today (Saturday). We discussed a little about what I could for fun over the weekend. I came up with my usual stuff like reading, art and blogging. He encouraged me to do something out of the box for me. So, this is where I get stumped as this means going to the stupid mall or something like that. I informed my therapist that I could call a friend and spend a few hours with them at the mall. Apparently, his first impression of me was correct when he stated “You don’t appear to be a mall type person. Good job with thinking outside of the box with doing something different with a friend.” I told my therapist that he was right that I am not a “mall type person.” He chuckled and we continued to discuss what my weekend plans were. I hope I am not wrong on this but my therapist appears that he is good at what he does. Yeah, he may be a little timid but I think that is his personality.

I think I am going to spend most of the weekend reading. I am hoping to finish my book this weekend. No promises on finishing it but I am getting closer to finishing it. I love reading.

I don’t think I have anything else to ramble on about. Peace Out, World!!!

Nothing Much Exciting To Read

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! So far today has been an uneventful day. A day full of boredom that thankfully didn’t lead to isolation. As I mentioned in my last post isolation is not a good thing for me. I am grateful that I went to day treatment as I interacted with folks. I went because I have been isolating and Junior is working today.

With all that being said, I am glad I went. I helped make lunch for the folks at treatment and enjoyed cooking. We had chicken stir fry. People appeared to like the food.

I also ended up working on one of my workbooks. The workbook I am working on is my Queer and Transgender Resilience Workbook. It is helping me a great deal with how I view myself as a non-binary, gender fluid, gender queer individual.

I was just finishing up a chapter in my workbook when it was time to do my fifteen minute Friday check-in with my therapist. It ended up being a 45 minute check in as we discussed a little bit about my workbook. We also discussed my med change yesterday and how I felt about it. We also discussed what I was going to do this weekend. We came up with me hanging out with a friend at the stupid mall.

After seeing my therapist, I came home. Now, that I am home I am relaxing before I clean my apartment. I feel like it is getting cluttered again. So I am going to be purging some things. Nobody really like to clean but it is a necessary part of living a life worth living or at least being and an adult.

Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated al the from drizzly Seattle. Happy Friday and Peace Out, World!!!

Boredom Strikes, Again

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am at my mental health center bored half out of my mind. I, technically didn’t have to come in today but decided to do so, so I wouldn’t be isolating. Isolating is not a good thing for me when I am dealing with depression.

As I am sitting here in the computer room of day treatment, blogging I am waiting for my therapist as we have fifteen minute check in’s on Friday. The check in’s can be in person or over the phone. My therapist appears to be invested in my recovery which is good thing. But I don’t know how much he is invested at the moment as our therapeutic relationship just started.

Since I am so bored, I think I am going to schedule some things in to do for next week. Having a regular schedule tends to help me out a great deal. The structure is what I need for my recovery or at least part of my recovery.

Another thing I might do is one of the workbooks I carry around with me. I carry two workbooks with me so when I get bored or am waiting for an appointment, I have something to do.

I better get going and socialize with others as I am here to not isolate. Have are great day and Peace Out, World!!!

A Woe-Is-Me Moment

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am having a woe is me moment. I have been on Facebook a lot lately and well it feels like that everyone else have some major accomplishments in their lives. I know realistically that I have accomplishments in my life. It just  feels like I have nothing to show for my life.

The above woe is me moment is due to seeing other peoples successes and accomplishments on Facebook. This can be quite dangerous for me. I tend to compare myself to others which means I become really hard on myself. Being really hard on myself is not a good thing.

I need to be me and no one else. Thank you for reading my woe is me moment. Peace Out, World!!!

Hump Day (Wed.) Morning Ramblings

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am sitting here at my laptop thinking about what I have going on today. Mainly, what I have going today is an interview. An interview to have a job as a Peer Specialist (Counselor). A job that I know I am capable of doing.

On that note I, posted about when I applied for the interview on a social media site. I informed people that “if and only if I get the job will I need stricter boundaries with a handful of individuals.” I deleted it primarily because I accidently crossed a friends boundary. On that note another “friend” commented on it. To find out this person thought I deleted it because of them. They passive aggressively mentioned something about my post on his wall without mentioning my name. More or less mutual friends knew who they were talking about as I got some private messages via social media and some text asking me if I’ve read and if I think it was about me. I’m not sure if it about me but I see how others may see it. The original post wasn’t even about them or geared toward them. I stated that “I’m freaking out” and that was the key part of the post as I was freaking out due to the possibilities of setting stricter boundaries that didn’t involve the person being passive aggressive. Maybe with me posting about this is being passive aggressive.  If it is being passive aggressive, I am not attempting to do so as I am just venting about. I guess I wish this individual would have reached out to me as I did them after seeing their post. Now this person is “livid” with me because they think I am “bragging” as I posted on social media that I have an interview. I am not sure what is going on with this person but I am concerned for them as they appear to be quite symptomatic to me.

Enough about that situation and on to a different topic, sort of. It’s about boundaries and how everyone has some form of them. Some of us are better at not letting folks cross them. For me it is easy for me to not allow folks to cross my boundaries with the exception of some of my family. I think that is why I got angry yesterday with family. I allowed them to cross my boundaries and that was all on me. Realizing this I can discuss it more my therapist so we can work on it.

I don’t have much more to say other than what I have already said. So, I am ending this post as I do not want to risk repeating myself. Peace Out, World!!!

Anxiety Over Job Interview

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! I am having some anxiety over my job interview tomorrow. I think I am more concerned on transportation than anything. Actually, I worry about the bus to get be back to the ferry after the interview as it only runs once an hour. The bus not the ferry.

I know myself well enough that once I am on my way there I won’t be so high anxiety. I say this because riding the ferry is helpful for me. It is one of the skills I have for myself to calm myself the fuck down.

As I am working through the anxiety I realize that I need use some skills. Skills like I have discussed multiple times in past post. One such skill is reading. I am hoping to finish the book soon but I am loving it. Another skill I can do is some art. Specifically, coloring.

Thank you for reading my blog as I go and use my skills. Peace Out, World!!!

Anger Subsided

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I am feeling slightly better than my last post. The anger subsided a great deal. After reading a couple of chapters in my book I realized that I needed to talk with friends so I did. Reading as well as talking with friends helped the anger subside. My therapist gave me a great suggestion of reading.

I need to get going as I realize I am hungry. I need to make dinner. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Musical Incantation

Posted on by Gertie

The Prompt: You’re absent-mindedly singing to yourself, when suddenly the topic of the song comes true.

I would hope to be singing something like Lean On Me or Stand By Me as these songs are about friendship and being of support to someone. Being a good friend and being of support to someone is one of my goals in life. A simple goal to change my little corner of the world. If we can make a difference in one person’s life then maybe that person can change the world and you helped in a small way.

Fun Times At The DSHS Office, NOT

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I had to go to the Department of Social and Human Services (DSHS) office to get back on Medicaid as Social Security stopped part of my disability benefits. It’s frustrating as hell when you pay into the system and unable to get your full benefits.

As I was in the at the DSHS office I found out I will be getting food stamps as well as them paying for my Medicare premiums which will be quite helpful for me. I just need to figure out how to pay for my bills.

This is where having a great support system comes in. Having friends to help in tough times including tough financial times is great. I wish everyone could have awesome friends like me.

Thank you for reading. Have a great day. Peace Out, World!!!

Just Another Rambling From Me; Gertie

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today, I went to therapy and saw Gilbert. We worked on both on my crisis plan and treatment plan. We spent about an hour and a half  working on both. On a sad note Gilbert is going to be working on a different team starting April but he will make sure that there will be a soft (or warm) hand off when my new clinician starts in April. As sad as I am that Gilbert is going to a different team, I am grateful that he will make sure I’ll have a good clinician.

I also went to DBT group. Only four of us showed up to group including myself. I am a little disappointed that only four people showed up today as I tend to learn better by hearing what others have to say.

Even though today is not quite St. Patrick’s Day, I celebrated it with friends a day early. We had corn beef, potato’s and cabbage. I love an authentic Irish meal especially when it’s celebrating my heritage.

Thanks for reading. Peace Out, World!!!