Sleepless, Once Again, in Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! I’m Sleepless in Seattle, once again. Since, I am having trouble I decided to work on my workbook: The Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook. I am finding this quite challenging for me as its really digging deep into who I am as a genderqueer non-conforming person. Stuff that I’ve been talking to both my therapist, Gilbert, and case manager about. They are helping me process what I need to while doing this workbook.

I also decided to start another self-help work book called The Mindfulness Workbook. It’s a beginners guide to overcoming fear and embracing compassion. I figured since one of my goals for 2018 was to increase my mindfulness and meditation skills. I am incorporating this into my daily practice now in the mornings.

Mindfulness seems to be helping me a great deal with my emotions and how I reacting to them and situations. Gilbert even mentioned it on Friday which shocked me as I wasn’t sure he was observing that.  It’s even helping my mental health symptoms.

Unfortunately, the lack of sleep is not helping with the mental health symptoms which is why I should get going. I think I will try to go and attempt to get some sleep. Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World

Weekly Plans

I almost forgot to do my weekly plans post. I did really well with what I planned for last week except for specific blog post and going to Social Security.  Here is what I have planned for this week and everything for today is already accomplished.

Sunday:

  • Blog. Well I’ve done this quite well as this is my sixth blog of the day.
  • Workbook. Done
  • One load of laundry. I did two loads
  • Buy new black dress shoes for interviews this week. Done
  • Get phone fixed. Done
  • Take out garbage. Done.

Monday:

  • See psychiatric nurse practitioner
  • Attend Knitting Group
  • Attend Art Group
  • See Gilbert for therapy
  • Workbook
  • Clean Kitchen and Entry way.
  • Blog

Tuesday:

  • Job interview
  • See Recovery Coach
  • Workbook
  • Clean Living Room
  • Blog

Wednesday:

  • Job interview
  • Therapy with Gilbert
  • Workbook
  • Continue Cleaning living room
  • Blog

Thursday:

  • Social Security
  • Workbook
  • Blog
  • Clean Bedroom

Friday:

  • Blog
  • Workbooks
  • Therapy with Gilbert
  • Clean Bedroom and bathroom

Saturday:

  • Blog
  • Workbook
  • Volunteer at Warm Line

I will be also visiting my grandma everyday I am able to. I hope everyone has a good week. Have a goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

Underdog, No More

The Superbowl and the Eagles winning the Superbowl had me thinking. Had me thinking about my own life. A life worth living is a life worth fighting for. The Eagle fought like hell to win the Superbowl so I need to fight like hell for my recovery. A recovery that I’ve already have been fighting for and will continue to do so.

For me I’ve been an underdog my whole life because of my learning disabilities, mental health conditions/challenges, sexual orientation and gender identity. With all that I just mentioned, I’ve been the underdog my whole life. I’m still considered an “underdog” yet I’m advocating for myself to be the success I want to be in my life. A success I’ve had before and know I will have once again.

I guess, I am saying is I’m not going to be the victim any more and most definitely won’t be the underdog, no more. For me that will be advocating for myself. I will be advocating for others as well. I wont allow myself to be an underdog no more.

Thank you for reading. I hope the rest of your Sunday is a peaceful one. Goodnight and Peace Out, World!!!

Last 9 Seconds

I literally only watched the last 9 seconds of the game. And well the Eagles one. Never underestimate the underdog. The Patriots looked disappointed however from the last nine seconds I saw, they didn’t work all that hard to make sure they got the ball. Eagles worked their asses of in the last nine second to make sure the Patriots didn’t get the ball. So from what I saw Eagles deserve the win and got the win. Never underestimate the power of the underdog. Thank you EAGLES from the Seahawk and 49ers fan!!!

I can relate todays win by the Eagles to my life. I’ve always been the underdog and underestimated throughout my life due to multiple disabilities as well as mental health challenges. If it weren’t for those who believed in me as well as music, I wouldn’t be here today blogging. So, just like the Eagles, I’m going to be a winner in life.

Thank you for reading. Have a good rest of your weekend and Peace Out, World!!!

Sports Talk

Good Morning, World!!! It’s Superbowl Sunday here in the United States. Some folks watch it for the football while other watch it for the commercials or the half time show. I’m not planning on watching it as I am NOT a Tom Brady fan and most definitely NOT a Patriots fan. I don’t want to support the Patriots by watching the Superbowl. I, however, hope the Eagles win.

Usually when the Superbowl is over with I consider it the unofficial start of baseball season. I am a huge baseball fan. This year is slightly different as it the Winter Olympics. Its the one sporting event that bring the world together. I plan on watching the Olympics as its a great sporting even to watch.

Thank you for reading my post about sports. Peace Out, World!!!

Sleepless In Seattle & Middle of Night Ramblings

Hello, World. Ugh, I am unable to sleep. I’m unable to sleep because of insomnia and being worried about my grandma. Being worried about my grandma is what has helped me use my DBT skills.

Skills that are helping me do the one of the photography courses WordPress does for free. I’ve realized through this that I like photography. Some of the assignments I already have pictures while others I have to go out and take pictures. Most of my pictures are taken right here in Seattle while others are taken in other parts of Washington. I, of course explain where the pictures are taken if they are not in Seattle.

Another thing that has been helping me is reading. I’ve been reading a history text book. I’m finding that really interesting. I have also been reading the book I’ve been talking about for the last week or two. I’m loving the book.

Thank you for reading. Goodnight and Peace Out, World!!!

Processing Grandma Being In Hospice Care

Good Evening, World!!! I wish Junior was not working for a multitude of reasons. Main reason is to help me through the fact that my grandma is in hospice care. But he has to work to pay his bills.

Having my grandma in hospice is really difficult for me and my family. Something that has been helpful to be are my DBT skills. I’ve been doing a lot of reading. It’s been helping me get out of head. Art has been helpful to me as a way to express my emotions. A way to not explode on myself or anyone else. Blogging has been helpful to process all this stuff.

I don’t deal well with painful emotions and my grandma being in hospice is quite challenging. She is aware of what is going on about eighty percent of the time which makes it that much more difficult. I love my grandma and hope she doesn’t suffer.

Thank you for reading my depressing post. I hope everyone has a good night. Enjoy the Superbowl tomorrow for those of you that live in the United States. Peace Out, World!!

Photography 1: Day 2; Street

Good Afternoon World!!! Today is the second day of Photography; Developing Your Eye; Day Two. Today’s topic is street. Piggy backing on yesterdays theme of home and how I shared pictures of my neighborhood I’m going to discuss the “main” street of the neighborhood I live in.

IMG_0249University Way NE fondly known as the “Ave.” The story behind on why its call the “Ave” is because at one point in time the street was called 14th Ave NE and the business’s in the area wanted to bring more business to the area so it started calling it the “Ave.” The city decided to change the name of the street to University Way NE due to the reason that the University of Washington is in this neighborhood yet the “Ave.” stuck.

IMG_0252Looking South on the “Ave.”

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Looking North on the “Ave.”

So as I hope you enjoyed getting to know me a little more with both todays and yesterday’s post as I showed you around my neighborhood. I hope everyone has a good afternoon and good work week. Peace Out, World

Life, The Challenges & Silver Linings

Good Morning, World!!! Its been a tough week for my family. My grandma is going into hospice care and we are attempting the best we can to keep it together for her. My grandma is a strong woman. She keeps giving me “talks” to make sure I go to my job interviews next week.

I am looking forward the possibility of going back to work. I’ve been missing being able to go to work. I really think being able to go to work helps with my mental health or at least the structure that goes with it. Being out of work has you think how much structure one must have to be able to not get so depressed or at least that is how it is for me. Work also gives me the social aspect of life. So for me work helps a great deal with a multiple of things in my life.

Life brings the bad and the good. Sometimes at the same time like at the moment. As life continues I am looking at the silver lining in things. Its difficult at time however it is possible. Yes, I am being realistic about my grandma however I know she wants me to look at the silver lining.

Thank you the reading. Have a great weekend. Peace Out, World!!!

Unproductive Day & Unable to Sleep

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Hello, World!!! I’ve been unproductive today and unable to sleep. Or at least I feel like I’ve been unproductive despite the things I’ve done today. The picture above is one of the many things I’ve done today. I may not be finished with it but I say I was successful with my art today since I started the picture today.

Another thing I did was read. I read the book I’ve been reading for a while and am still enjoying the book a great deal. Below is a what I am reading.

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Another thing I did was watch a handful of TedTalks. I watched some on race as well as those who live with autism. Here are my notes on two of them. One is about Autism and the other about race.

The World Needs All Kinds of Minds

  • Autism is a continuum
  • To understand Autism is to think pictures.
  • Visual learning is key
  • Pattern Thinkers: Music and math minds
  • Verbal minds: Poor at drawing.
  • Photo Realistic Thinks: Poor at Algebra
  • Autistics tend to be fixated on one certain  thing

Color Blind or Color Brave

  • Race is a risky topic to talk about
  • The first step in taking action is awareness
  • Racial discrimination is bad for business
  • Color blindness means ignoring the problem
  • We have to be “color brave” by being willing to have open discussions about race.
  • Observe your environment
  • Speak up

Thank you for reading. I’m going to try and get some sleep now. Goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!