Tag Archives: Mental Illness

A Mindfulness Type of Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Or maybe I should say Happy Friday Eve!!! Either way, I am greeting everyone with a smile despite being somewhat anxious. Not sure why, I am anxious and I am okay with that. I am okay with that because of doing mindfulness and meditation.

I started doing the “Daily Calm” on the “Calm” app once again. At one point in time I did the “Daily Calm” over one hundred days in a row. I am hoping that I can get back into the habit of doing it again like I did before because it helped me be in a better headspace.

Not only does the “Daily Calm” put me in a better headspace, my cat does it as well. My cat, Billie Dean has helped me a great deal to be in a better headspace. Billie has also helped me do mindfulness especially when he is on my lap. I am so grateful for my cat.

I don’t have much else to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. Once again, thank you from the bottom of heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Yesterday Was Not a Good Day

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World or at least it is three twenty one in the morning in Seattle. Yesterday (Tuesday) was not a good day for me. I ended up in the hospital twice in the Emergency Room due to being suicidal. First time I went in it was four something in morning and was discharged. Thankfully I got home just in time for my psychiatric nurse practitioner called me for our phone appointment, She put me on Ativan which was a good thing.

Being home was not a good thing so I called my therapist who is fairly new to me and appears to be a great therapist. I also called one of the supervisors who happens to be my therapist supervisor. I called the both and left them both an email. The supervisor suggested to go back to the hospital so I did. But the first thing I did was have my grandpa and uncle pick up Billie with his supplies to take to grandpa. My uncle and grandpa dropped me back at the same hospital I was earlier.

On that note they had already did shift change and the social worker on duty was surprised to see me as I’m not going to the Emergency Room for mental health in over four years. Partly glad it was her and partly wish she wasn’t her. She pointed out some stuff I needed to hear which let me come back home. I’m glad she helped me make that decision as I fear if I ended back in a psych ward I most likely would have retreated to old behavior.

As of right now I can’t sleep for unknown reasons so I took an Ativan to help with my anxiety since Billie my cat is with my grandpa and uncle. I know Billie is in good hands but I sure do miss the little dude. Well not so little as he is fifteen and a half pounds. He could loos a few pounds just like I do.

I do not have much to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Thank you again, from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Stress Free Sunday

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! It is eight o’clock in the evening here in Seattle. If you read my blog on the regular basis you know that I have been laid of as of this past Friday (June 3rd). Yesterday I was stressing a little bit but realized the stress knowing I was being laid off is not long a stress at least at the moment. It has been a stress free Sunday and feel great to be stress free. The last three months at my now previous employ caused my anxiety and depression symptom increase. Now that everything is done now with the lay offs it is like the lift has been lifted.

On that note I volunteered today and as PAWS Cat City and that help immensely. I’m happy that volunteer at Cat City because it is a form of self care for me just like my own cat Billie is a source to help with my stress. It appears that animals help a great deal. I am grateful for my cat Billie and and my volunteer job at Cot City.

On a good note I have a job interview tomorrow. I am nervous as hell but at least if I don’t get the job I have the practice of the job interview. Send good juju, energy, vibes or any thing good my way when it comes to my job interview tomorrow (Monday).

I don’t have much to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. It it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Haven’t Been Back to Sleep Yet

Posted on by Gertie

Good Sleepy Saturday Morning to you from Seattle. I still haven’t been to sleep since I was rudely awaken by three neighbors in the hallway screaming at each other. Two went to jail for domestic violence while the third when to the hospital tot get psych evolution.

Currently it is peaceful on my floor and Billie my cat is trying to help me write this blog. I think he is trying to tell me we both need more sleep which I agree with his assessment. I love Billie so much how he helps with my anxiety.

As some of you know I have advertisements on my blog. Every time someone clicks on an advertisement, I get a paid few cent per add buy I don’t get paid the money till I hit at least the on hundred mark and then I get the money. I am hoping that you the read look at least one or two adds every time you are reading my blog. I could really use the money now that I’ve been laid off. Every click to an advertisement helps. I’m usually not the one to ask for money and I have June and Julys rent paid for all reading with my apartment management. My bills are covered through July as well. The one thing I will be lacking is food as you can only get certain about of food from the food banks and I am not quite qualified for food stamps. I will try get unemployment and am worried how I can pay for my meds but will try to get stated aid for medical through the state. The is why I am asking that you click on the advertisements to help, pretty please the a cherry on top.

It is now eight o one o’clock in the morning I am I am going to try to get some sleep. Thank you for reading blog. It means a log to me. Peace Our, World!!!

Good Sleep Turned into Not so Good Sleep

Posted on by Gertie

Well, Fucking Good Morning, World!!! I was surprisingly having a good night considering my last official day of work was yesterday (Friday). Considering it was emotional day, I wasn’t expecting a good night sleep till three of my neighbors got in an extremely loud scream match at three thirty in the morning. It almost got physical at one point in time. It is now four forty five in the morning and the Seattle police showed up to the screaming match that was already lasted an hour at four thirty five in the morning Seattle time. Needless to say my neighbors on my floor and myself aren’t exactly happy with the screaming neighbor and the lack of response from the Seattle Police Deportment.

It reality I was hoping my good night sleep wouldn’t have been interrupted due to the fact yesterday (Friday) was my final day at work due to lay offs. A good night sleep for me after a traumatic event of being laid off would have been good for my mental health symptoms. Right now is a time to reflect on a job I loved a sadly got laid off from. A job that turned into a dream job for me.

On the bright spot I have my cat, Billie sleeping with me which is a comfort in itself. Having Billie around going to my therapist has helped me get through the last three months of know I was and now officially laid off.

On the great news front I have three interviews next week. Two of the three sound promising. I am telling future employs that I would need two week in between my end date at my now former employer and starting a new job and everyone appeared to be okay with that considering how traumatizing the lay off process was for everyone involved.

It’s not five o’clock in the morning and the cops are at my door wanting to know what I heard and saw from the screaming neighbors. So, I need to get going. I hope everyone has a good restful weekend and a Happy Saturday. Peace Out, World

Not Sure How to Title this Post

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Not sure how to write this post as I have a lot to say but due to some legal stuff through like signing legal documentation about my lay off date as well as bad new about a client and due to HIPAA laws can’t disc close that. It’s hard to believe I have a week and half at my current employer. I’m sad that I am getting laid off especially from a job love.

On a good not I have job interview on June 6th and looking forward to it. If I get I hired, I don’t think I would like the commute since I will have to take public transportation which will take a while or take a LYFT which is expensive. I hope I get the job be I’m not holding my breath or counting my chickens at this point in time.

I think I will spend the rest of the day hanging out with my cat Billie reading a Star Wars book. Yes, I do like Star Wars. I’ve seen all he movie thus far not my goal is read all the Star Wars books. I know it’s weird but I need something to do as I apply for job, wait for interview and hope I get a job.

I don’t have much to say in this particular post. Thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. So, again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means a lot to me that you do. Peace Out, World!!!

Home Sick From Work

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!!! Or at least it is still morning here in the Seattle area. As I look out the window it looks like the typical gloomy day of clouds and thankfully no drizzle or rain. In fact I won’t be working today because I feel sick due to the issues I had regarding bladder and kidney issues which doesn’t help the depression. So the gloomy skies of Seattle fit my mood of depression due to illness.

Since I’m not working today, it is going to be one o those days I spend in bed. I’ll be in bed with my cat Billie reading. I will be reading Science Fiction books as well as comic books. I most likely will be reading comic books. It just feels like a comic book type of sick day.

It will feel weird not working today because I usually work from home on Mondays. I did put my work laptop away so I wouldn’t be tempted to work and do what is needed for me to do. On that note, my cat will be happy to get more attention today since I am not working from home.

I don’t have much more to say. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. So thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Just a rambling of a post

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, Everyone. Well at least it is still is here in Seattle for another few minutes. My depression is action up and at least I know my meds are work for my depression. I just need to use the skills in my tool box and WRAP plan the help lessen the depression. In fact Billie, my cat is helping with my depression.

Sadly, depression is increasing my self harm urges is why I am focusing on my self care plan. My self-care play is to continue to listen to music and do art. Also I will be going to a street fair tomorrow (Saturday). The last time this street fair happened was in 2019 and was cancelled in 2020 and 2021 due to Covid019. I’m looking forward to attending.

As far as my self harm urges, I plan on working on my skills to keep myself sane. Of course Billie will be a big help with that.

I don’t have much more to say except thank you for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Peace Out!!!

1,000 Followers

Posted on by Gertie

Hello, World!!! Today, has been an unexpected. First I found out that I have reached over one thousand followers on this blog. It is slightly surprising to find out that my first blog post was on May 31, 2014 and it’s taken this long get a thousand followers but I’m okay with that. I’m okay because I know my blog it not everyone cup of tea.

I started this blog to help lesson the stigma of having a mental health challenge as well as to educate other the people like me can be productive members of society no matter how it looks for the individual person. I also started blogging in hope to give others dealing with mental health challenges hope and that recovery look different for everyone.

I’ve discussed many things on this blog. Everything from self care to having a diagnosis to therapy and meds. We even discussed stigma as well as working creating a life worth living. I am grateful that as of right now life is worth living for me at the moment and I hope you can get to that point as well.

I do not have much more to say except thank to all my thousand followers for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means the world to me. Peace Out, World!!!

Resiliency Making an Appearance

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! The last two and half months have been challenging for me and many others due to the unexpected news off my employer closing and being laid off. It has been quite traumatizing for all involved and am beyond grateful for the support I have received from many different people including those, I never expected support from.

If you been reading my blog regularly the last two and half months, you know I’m getting laid off due to my employer closing. Due to Covid-19 I know most of my colleagues via zoom and same goes for the clients I serve. Any way, I am realizing the fact how resilient myself, colleagues and clients are while sharing the same trauma even though we are experiencing it in different ways.

As sucky as the pandemic has been, Zoom has become a love hate relationship. Zoom may has it’s problems but it sure has its ups. Lets start by the best part of Zoom meetings and appointments which is surprise visits from all the pets which includes on my end seeing (and hearing) birds, rabbits, cats, dogs, turtles, snakes, rats and a miniature horse. I think with the seeing all the animals people have as pets has built a rapport with others if the pandemic didn’t happen. I know my cat, Billie, has helped my clients in Zoom appointments. Hell, Billie and my colleagues pets have helped ease a lot of meetings when they (pets) make an appearance in meetings.

Not only have pets including my own cat Billie has helped with my resiliency, music has helped a great deal. The last two and have months my recovery play list has helped a great with the resiliency part of my recovery. My recovery play list appears to be the play list I’ve been listening to the most since I found out I was being laid off. So music helping so much just my cat Billie is.

I don’t have much more to say except that my cat, Billie (and other animals/pets I see in Zoom meetings) and music have been helping me a great deal with being resilient. I also want to thanks you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!