Tag Archives: Mental Illness

The Weather Sucks but Friends & Cats Don’t Suck

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am suppose to be working and am on the clock. I just don’t have anything going for work regarding clients or meetings till twelve noon Seattle time. I am also all caught up on paperwork. I’m not a big fan of paperwork which is why I do it as soon as possible so it is not hanging over my head like a dark cloud.

Speaking of dark clouds, the weather in Seattle sucks today even for Seattle’s weather. Days like today in the weather department does make it easier to work from home. Also, days like today doesn’t help my depression. At least the sucking weather fits my sucky mood of depression.

My depression might be acting up which is why I decided to go out to breakfast with a friend of mine. My friend and I went to breakfast to catch up with each other and what is going on in each other’s lives. I am always happy to catch up with friends especially over a good meal. The best part of the meal with my friend was sharing funny stories about our cats.

Since we are now on the topic of cats, I will be volunteering this evening at PAWS Cat City. I am looking forward to it. I love volunteering at PAWS Cat City. It always brightens my day as well as my week when I volunteer especially when my depression is acting up.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope everyone has a great day ahead of them. Peace Out, World!!!

The Day That Changed My Life, Again

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! Today marks exactly three years since I adopted my last cat Lil Gertie. I miss her a great deal and wish I had more time with her. Sadly, I only had a year and a half with her before she crossed over the rainbow bridge.

The therapist I had three years ago suggested getting an Emotional Support Animal (ESA). We discussed why it would be good for my recovery and help reduce the symptoms of my mental health challenges. So, I decided to adopt a cat from PAWS Cat City here in Seattle. I connected with Lil Gertie at first site. She changed my life in so many ways.

One of the ways that she changed my life is that she gave me something to focus on other than myself and what I was struggling with. She gave me a purpose I was lacking when I adopted her. She helped me gain self confidence and self worth.

Due to the self confidence and self worth I gained, I was able to go back to work. Going back to work even though it was part time for just over two years helped me not just with my self worth and self confidence, it helped me realize what I wanted to do with my life which was to be a peer support specialist again. Now, I can happily say I am once again a peer support specialist and working fulltime.

Sadly, Lil Gertie couldn’t see me become a peer support specialist again because she crossed over the rainbow bridge on Thanksgiving Day of 2019. Lil Gertie received a cancer diagnosis in October of 2019 and she was given six months to live, maybe nine months. When I was given this news I started the volunteer process to become a volunteer at PAWS Cat City. It was in the middle of this process that Lil Gertie had a mini stroke on Thanksgiving Day and made the decision that it was best to end her suffering by having the vet help her cross the rainbow bridge. Yes, I was with Lil Gertie when she crossed over.

Despite loosing Lil Gertie in the middle of the process of becoming a volunteering PAWS Cat City, I continued the process. I continued as I knew it would not only help me with my grief of loosing Lil Gertie, I wanted to help cat find their furrever homes and to help people find their new best friend. I had my first shift at PAWS Cat City in January of 2020.

It was while on a volunteer shift at PAWS Cat City, that Billie Dean my current cat and I fell in love with each other. I put him on hold to get the what I needed for him and adopted him the next day. Billie has been apart of my life for just over a year now and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Yes, I miss Lil Gertie and love her with all my heart but I wouldn’t change anything for the world. Today, is the day she changed my life forever and for the better.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope everyone has a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Ramblings About Today

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I missed my session with my new therapist on Tuesday and she called me today to do fifteen minute session. Something I wasn’t expecting but I am very much grateful for the time she gave me. Her kindness is awesome. I am a little weary of her being so timid but I will give her a chance as sometimes the timid ones tend to be the best therapist I have had.

I did work from work from home today. I only had three clients today and all were done via phone. The other part of the day was a two hour meeting as well as writing notes. According to the Clinical Director, I “write really good notes.” I am not sure about that but I having to train all the Peer Specialist how to write them when the lead peer comes back from leave. I am not sue how this person will react as I have only be at my new employer for five months. I really do love my job.

As much as I love the work I do, I do need time to take care of myself. So I am spending this evening doing art. The type of art I am doing is coloring. I love coloring as it is quite helpful. I colored as I listened to a podcast about philosophy. The specific podcast I listened to is Philosophize this. I learned a great about philosophy and finished a picture that I am proud of.

Now it is time for me to turn on the music full blast as I clean my bathroom. Doesn’t sound very fun but I enjoy cleaning the bathroom especially since that is where my cats litter box is. I love my cat Billie Dean so much that I clean the bathroom everyday. Billie seems to like it as I play some really good music.

I don’t have much more to say in this particular blog post. I, do, however, want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. It means a great deal to me. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

A Not So Brief Blog About Current Life Lessons

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I have many things going on in my life on why I temporally put a halt to doing some blogging courses through WordPress. Courses where I have left off. So I will get back to them once I works shit out in my personal life which is being affected by workplace bullying.

The workplace bullying is starting to affect my physical health primarily with with dealing with migraines. Three of the migraines I received ended up in the emergency room and was inform that it was most likely due to the bully I am receiving at work. Even thou I am being bullied at work, I am feeling supported by my supervisor, the clinical director and HR as well as a good portion of my colleagues. Despite the bullying I still love my job and know that I have people in my workplace that support place.

On somewhat of a work related thing is that I finally was able to get my first Covid-19 vaccine. I got it after much research on my part as well as gentle reminders as suggestions from my employer. Getting the vaccine is not requirement from my job but highly suggested. I decided to take my vaccine and my I took my first one yesterday. I had a slight allergic reaction of a burning throat with an itchy rash. I took Benadryl and went away after about forty-five minutes of taking the Benadryl. I am still planning on taking the second dose.

I took my first vaccine yesterday (Saturday) morning and feel like shit but It is well worth it. Well worth it for me because it means I can help others by getting the vaccines. Sadly, I had to miss my normal volunteer shift at PAWS Cat City today because of how shitty I feel after getting the vaccine. It makes me sad to miss time with all the cats but I am grateful that I have extra time with my own cat, Billie Dean. As much as I love spending time helping other cats find furrever homes, I am grateful to have more time with my cat, Billie. I love all the cats I help.

I would love to say more but I am getting really tired and needing to take another nap. I hope you have a great Sunday ahead of you. I want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things for reading my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. I hope you all have an awesome rest of you Sunday world and have a great work week ahead of you when Monday makes an appearance. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Posted on by Gertie

Sunday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Volunteer at PAWS Cat City
  • Work on step one
  • Attend a twelve step meeting

Monday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Attend a twelve step meeting
  • Work on step one
  • Work

Tuesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work on step one
  • Work

Wednesday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Work on step one
  • Attend a twelve step meeting

Thursday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Work on step one

Friday

  • Mindfulness meditation practice
  • Work
  • Attend twelve step meeting
  • Work on step one

Saturday

  • Mindfulness meditation
  • Clean apartment
  • Work on step one
  • Attend a twelve step meeting

Weekly Check-In

Posted on by Gertie

This past week has been quite a week. Overall, it has been a good one with a couple of not so good moments. Moments, I will get through with the help of friends, family and colleagues as well my cat Billie Dean.

The week started out with my birthday and being able to celebrate it with friend and family. I celebrated my birthday with both sides if my family. I first celebrated with my dad’s side of the family here in Seattle. I then traveled to Olympia to celebrate with my mom’s side of the family.

As I spent time in Olympia, my grandpa took care of my cat Billie Dean at his home in the Seattle area. I really missed be with Billie but I enjoyed my time with my mom and uncle as well as a couple of friends who live in the Olympia area.

The best part of my birthday was that I started the first step of the twelve step program I am in. I am slowly working on the first step. I wish it wasn’t taking as long as I had hope it was. I am grateful to be working on the twelve steps.

I am grateful to be home from Olympia and I think my cat Billie is glad to be home from my grandpa’s. Hell, we are both happy to be home together. I did end up having some health issues. I had a migraine and had to to take an expected day off of from work yesterday. All I can say is migraines suck shit.

My supervisor did check in with me yesterday as she thought I took yesterday off due to being bullied by a colleague. I assured my supervisor that I was not taking it off due to bullying that I was taking it off due to a migraine. My supervisor is just an amazing person. Even though someone at work is bullying me, I am grateful that my supervisor and colleagues are supportive of me.

I don’t have much more to say in this particular weekly check in. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Feeling Supported

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon, World!!! Right now I am feeling supported. I am feeling supported in many different ways by many different people including my cat, Billie Dean. Yes, I realize Billie is a cat and not a human but I feel supported by him.

I feel supported by the various people in my life due to circumstances going on in my life. I was and am on the receiving end of being bullied by a colleague. When it became clear on Thursday that I was being bullied, my supervisor and many of my colleagues have been checking in on me even today, a Saturday. I am thrilled that my colleagues at my new job are backing me up and supporting me.

To add to being bullied, I ended up having to call out sick yesterday (Friday) due to a migraine. Again, my colleagues as well as friends and family checked in on me throughout yesterday and today. My grandpa even brought over groceries today and made me a meal. My grandpa didn’t have to make me lunch but he did. He, a neighbor and myself sat on the community patio of my apartment building and had lunch. It was nice to eat lunch with a friend and my grandpa.

Another way I felt supported today was going to a twelve step meeting. A twelve step meeting my sponsor regularly attends. Of course the meeting was not in person due to Covid-19 but at least I was able to attend one over Zoom. Zoom is a godsend during the pandemic and am grateful for it especially when it comes to attending twelve step meetings. My sponsor checked in with me after the meeting. We discussed how I was doing regarding my first step and how it is a slow process at the moment.

Of course as I mentioned earlier on in this post, I am feeling supported by my cat, Billie Dean. I love my cat, Billie so much. It is amazing how supportive pets can be in peoples lives. My cat has been a great support for me and am grateful for him.

I do not have much more to say in this particular job post. I just want to say thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you do read my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration; Day 3: One Word Inspiration

Posted on by Gertie

HOPE

For me hope is a simple yet loaded word. If it wasn’t for hope, I don’t think I would be typing this post much less alive. Hope comes from many sources but most importantly it comes from within. My cat Billie Dean gives me hope. He gives me hope by just being so adorable and choosing me to adopt him. Billie gives me hope in so many ways that I can not explain it. The hope that is within myself helps me be a better person and allows me to be compassionate toward others. Hope is the reason why I am in recovery from a mental health challenge.

Everyday Inspiration; Day 2: Write A List

Posted on by Gertie

Things I’ve Learned In Recovery

  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) Skills
  • Setting boundaries
  • The love my family has for me
  • Friends and family I can depend on
  • To not take life too seriously
  • Some days are going to be tougher than other days and that is okay
  • Mistakes are teachable moments as well as lessons learned
  • It’s okay if the only I thing do is get out of bed; some days are going to be like that
  • Helping others helps me; but make sure I put myself first or I might not be able to help others in a health way
  • Working helps me with my recovery and gives me a sense of purpose
  • Volunteering not only helps with my depression and other diagnosis it helps the community at large
  • Building a community the accepts me as me
  • Being in more that one community is a good thing
  • Having an emotional support animal (ESA) to take care  to help with depression (currently my cat, Billie Dean)
  • Doing self care is not selfish

A Thousand Words to Say Yet Nothing Comes Out But Tears Through the Eyes

Posted on by Gertie

I am continuing to love my job and try to help wear I can. It appears that I am being bullied slightly at work. I’m being bullied by a white person because I am sticking up for my colleagues the identify as part of the BIPOC community. I did what I needed to do and all I want is everyone to be treated with respect no matter what what they identify as. Sadly, I am being bullied by a white colleagues. During the meeting only one person was against me as my team had my back. I felt I have the back of most of my colleagues including my supervisor. My supervisor is just one amazing human being. and am grateful to for her to be on board.

I learned a great deal about my colleagues and how supportive they are with dealing with such a bully in the work place. My Supervisor came by my -place to take our cats out for walks and for we can meet in person for the first time. I’m grateful for her checking up on me and a mutual walk with our cats. Our cats got along great.

I know there is bully at my place at work and I feel like it getting taking care off. I like the fact that my colleagues might be come friends. Love being about to talk about cat stuff instead of just work. I love cast

I do not know what else to say for the day expect a great big thank you. Thank you for reading.