Early Morning Ramblings

Good Morning, World!!! It is 3:33 in the morning in my neck of the woods. Yes, I realize it is early but at least I got some sleep. I think I got about four hours of sleep. I, did however wake up from a nightmare. A nightmare that scared the shit out of me but thankfully I was able to get the support I needed from a friend.

After talking to my friend, I am now blogging. Pretty much I am blogging about whatever comes to mind at the moment. Hence the reason why my title is what it is.

As mentioned in a previous post, I checked in with my therapist yesterday (Friday). We discussed what I am going to do this weekend. I told him I don’t have much going except cleaning my apartment later on today (Saturday). We discussed a little about what I could for fun over the weekend. I came up with my usual stuff like reading, art and blogging. He encouraged me to do something out of the box for me. So, this is where I get stumped as this means going to the stupid mall or something like that. I informed my therapist that I could call a friend and spend a few hours with them at the mall. Apparently, his first impression of me was correct when he stated “You don’t appear to be a mall type person. Good job with thinking outside of the box with doing something different with a friend.” I told my therapist that he was right that I am not a “mall type person.” He chuckled and we continued to discuss what my weekend plans were. I hope I am not wrong on this but my therapist appears that he is good at what he does. Yeah, he may be a little timid but I think that is his personality.

I think I am going to spend most of the weekend reading. I am hoping to finish my book this weekend. No promises on finishing it but I am getting closer to finishing it. I love reading.

I don’t think I have anything else to ramble on about. Peace Out, World!!!

Yucky Weather + Depression = Reading

Good Evening, World!!! Right now I am dealing with some increase of depression symptoms. Which is not a good thing because the weather is just yucky outside. Yucky weather doesn’t help with the increase of symptoms.

Since the increase of depressive symptoms and yucky weather I am going to read. Hell, it is perfect weather to be curled up in bed with a good book. A book to help me forget about my symptoms even though I know it is temporary.

In fact it was my therapist that suggested that I read. He works odd hours and I am okay with that as it appears that it fits what I need at the moment. He works five days a week and two of those days his hours are 9am to 5pm while the other three days are 12noon to 8pm. Today is one of those days he is in the office till 8pm. That is why I was able to talk to him this late.

I think I am going to take the suggestion to go and read. Thank you for reading. Have a great weekend and Peace Out, World!!!

No Sleep + Reading = Help With Anxiety

Good Morning, World!!! I am reluctantly still awake. I wish I was able to have got to sleep last night but now that it is 6:14 in morning and I have an appointment I am tired enough to fall asleep. I am hoping that after my appointment as well as getting some errands done, I am able to take a nap.

As elusive as sleep has been for me last night, I was able to get a lot of reading done. Reading helped me relax and it lessened my anxiety. Reading helps a great with my anxiety.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World

Another Night Sleepless in Seattle

Good Morning, World!!! It is two o’clock in the morning and I am struggling with sleep once again. It’s raining out again. I love the sound of rain especially when I am unable to sleep. Listening to the rain helps me do mindfulness and meditation practices.

Another thing I have been doing since I am unable to sleep is reading. Reading is helping not dwell on the fact that I am unable to sleep. Reading also helps me relax enough to hopefully help me get to sleep. Since I want to get back to sleep I think I’ll get back to reading.

Thank you for reading. Goodnight & Peace Out, World!!!

Anxiety Over Job Interview

Hello, World!!! I am having some anxiety over my job interview tomorrow. I think I am more concerned on transportation than anything. Actually, I worry about the bus to get be back to the ferry after the interview as it only runs once an hour. The bus not the ferry.

I know myself well enough that once I am on my way there I won’t be so high anxiety. I say this because riding the ferry is helpful for me. It is one of the skills I have for myself to calm myself the fuck down.

As I am working through the anxiety I realize that I need use some skills. Skills like I have discussed multiple times in past post. One such skill is reading. I am hoping to finish the book soon but I am loving it. Another skill I can do is some art. Specifically, coloring.

Thank you for reading my blog as I go and use my skills. Peace Out, World!!!

Anger Subsided

Good Evening, World!!! I am feeling slightly better than my last post. The anger subsided a great deal. After reading a couple of chapters in my book I realized that I needed to talk with friends so I did. Reading as well as talking with friends helped the anger subside. My therapist gave me a great suggestion of reading.

I need to get going as I realize I am hungry. I need to make dinner. Have a great evening. Peace Out, World!!!

Anger = Call to Therapist

Good Afternoon, World!!! As much as I love my family, they are driving me nuts right now. Driving me nuts over petty shit that I shouldn’t let get to me but I do.

I talked with my new therapist about this and he suggested some things for me to do so I am not so angry with them. The cool thing about everything is that he knew what questions to ask about me and my anger. He now knows that me calling when I am angry is a good. This is a way for me to be preventative to do self harm urges and self harm acts. Thankfully, the anger toward my family didn’t lead to self harm urges which is why I was being preventative.

Something that my therapist and I came up with is to keep my mind busy so reading and books. I found out that my therapist is also an avid reading. His enjoys science fiction and fantasy genres. Knowing something as simple as this helps me with trusting my therapist. Talking about ways to not be so angry and books with my therapist helped lessened the anger a great deal.

Thank you for reading. Peace Out, World.

Got Zzzz

ben yatıyorum sözlük ışığı kapatI am unable to sleep. I purposely didn’t go to bed at seven o’clock so I could sleep tonight. Apparently, the universe had thought differently. I just want to sleep. It’s almost three o’clock in the morning in my neck of the world and I just want to sleep. I think the sleep thing has a little bit to do with my stupid ass depression.

I have been doing some reading. I am finding it quite helpful tonight. It’s relaxing me enough that I hope that I can get an hour or two of sleep tonight.

Goodnight. Peace Out, World!!!

The Woes of the Days, So Far

Good Afternoon, World!!! Well, it is just barely after twelve noon in my part of the world. Actually, to be exact it is twelve eleven in the afternoon to be exact.

I am having a moment of grief as I am blogging. I am miss my grandma. I miss everything about her especially the small things she would do for me. I love her so much and wish she was still alive. Reality is she is not going to rise from the dead.

Despite grieving over my grandma, I am doing okay at the moment. I can’t say that for one of my neighbors as they are appearing to be in crisis. A bad enough crisis that they had to go to the hospital to get evaluated. This person pulled the fire alarm several times since my last post. The fire alarm is annoying as hell but it is meant to be that way for folks to leaver their apartment. Yet, when the fire alarm is going off due to someone being in crisis it makes it harder to believe it is the real thing. I just wish the person wasn’t in crisis. Not because the fire alarm in annoying as hell but because being in crisis sucks shit.

Now, I am going to relax by reading my book. I am thrilled that I can get out of my head by reading especially a book I really enjoy. Having a book that is difficult to put down is a great problem to have.

Tanks you for reading. Peace Out, World!!!

Weekly Plans

Sunday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Cross Stitch
  • Color
  • Basically be lazy all day

Monday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art Group

Tuesday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Therapy /Case management

Wednesday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Not quite sure quite yet

Thursday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • See Psych ARNP
  • Clean Apartment

Friday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Again, another day with nothing really planned

Saturday

  • Blog
  • Read
  • Art
  • Cross Stitch
  • Be lazy