Tag Archives: Weather

Slightly Struggling

Posted on by Gertie

Good Afternoon!!! I am slightly struggling once again despite keeping myself busy. Busy with various things and activities that have been quite helpful this time around. I just wish I was not struggling at the moment as struggling sucks shit.

If you read my last post, you are then aware that I woke up way too freaking early. I am tired as hell and I am seriously thinking about taking a nap. A nap that might not be a good idea as it could prevent me from sleeping tonight which I really do want to sleep tonight.

As I mentioned above I have been keeping myself busy with various things. One of those things was having an unscheduled in person appointment with my therapist. The appointment went well. In fact I admire my therapist a great deal, for many reasons.

After seeing my therapist, I went to the pharmacy to pick up my medicine. I picked up nine prescriptions. Four of those prescriptions are for psych reasons to help with my mental health diagnosis. The other five are for my physical health. One of those five meds is an antibiotic for a bladder which could be one of the reasons why I am slightly struggling.

There is also another reason why I am slightly struggling which is quite normal for me and many others living in Seattle this time of year is the weather. The weather is yucky at the moment but I have seen it much worse here in Seattle. Due to the weather being yucky today and yesterday, I have been using my happy light (or happy lamp) to help with my depression. I also have seasonal affective depressive disorder which is also known as SADD.

Another thing I have been doing to keep myself busy is attending online twelve step meetings. Twelve step meetings which I have found quite helpful for myself. I am so grateful that I started going back to these twelve step meetings.

I also have been doing a great deal of art work. Specifically, I have been coloring a small poster I bought from Stuff2Color.com. I love to buy coloring posters from Stuff2Color because they are very detailed and keep me busy for hours on end. While I colored, I listened to music on Spotify. I have had my recovery play list playing in the background to help me focus on my recovery.

One of the other things I have done to keep myself busy is read. I have been reading Pet Cemetery by Stephen King. Right now I am on a horror book kick. Partly because it is Halloween time and partly because of the weather. As I read my cat, Billie, was laying in my lap. I love my cat so very much.

I do not have anything else to write about in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

A Rough Morning

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! I am having a rough morning. A rough enough morning that I called my therapist who surprisingly answered her phone. She is able to squeeze me in for an in person appointment later this morning.

My therapist agrees with me that the lack of sleep and the current yucky weather that having a session today will be beneficial for me. I usually see my therapist every other week and it is done virtually so it will be nice to have an in person appointment with her today. My therapist is a sweetheart and works very hard to help me especially the last two and a half months after the recent trauma.

I don’t have much more to write in this particular post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Middle of the Night Ramblings & Some Frustrations

Posted on by Gertie

Good middle of the night from Seattle. I am tired as fucking hell. I sadly, woke up from a horrific nightmare that included body memories. PTSD and depression are no joke and I am grateful to both my friends and the mental health treatment team. I am also grateful for my cat who is very helpful. My family has been helpful even though they are not aware of my most recent trauma.

Despite not being able to sleep due to PTSD and insomnia, I am a little peeved with Amazon as some of my items that I ordered have not arrived . Amazon informed me that I have to wait three business days which sucks shit but oh well, it is stuff I need to clean my apartment. On another note some of the stuff that is late is stuff that will help me with my coping skills regarding the symptoms of my mental health diagnosis. Amazon can be clueless at times but at least they are quick on delivering books.

As far as Amazon goes, I am waiting on a multitude of different types of creative outlets for me to do. I am gong to try embroidery. I don’t think it is not all that different from cross stitching but still willing to give it a try. Sadly the embroidery and cross stitching is delayed by Amazon which sucks shit. At least on the plus side some of some of my diamond art is being sent but not all of it. I did get a couple of cross stitching things but now all that I ordered like everything else I ordered.

Now on to my work. I missed yesterday due to some PTSD and depression issues which sucks. Having a mental health challenge sucks especially when it affects your work. In fact I will be missing my job later today when it is not in the middle of the night. I really do love my job.

I am planning on hanging out with family for some breakfast and friends for food. I love hanging out with people especially when food is involved.

Thank you for reading Peace Out, World and have a good rest of you night.

A Bundle of Emotions

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! Right now I am dealing with many various emotions. Some emotions I wish I didn’t have to deal with however I know if I don’t sit with them and radically accept them as they are things tend to get worse for me. On that note, my mental health team and doctor think that I am doing “okay” mental health wise considering what I went through two weeks ago even though I feel like I am going backwards with my mental health. It has been brought to my attention by a friend that I am having “unrealistic expectations” of myself and where I feel like I should be regarding my recovery after being hurt like I was and my mental health agrees. Hell, I agree because I wouldn’t expect my friend or my clients to be in a good place after being assaulted.

I am currently excited and anxious about going back to work this Sunday (August 20th). I am excited because I love my job and the people I work with as well as love the people I am able to serve. I am also excited to go back to work because I feel like the structure of work will help me get back to some form of normalcy of my life. Plus, structure tends to be something I need and crave due to my mental health disability as well as other disabilities such as ADHD. I am anxious to go back to work because I feel like I am going to be in trouble and that my supervisors will be more focused on how I am doing emotionally versus how I am doing the job. I know that my supervisors are super supportive however I am extremely self-conscious.

Being hurt like I was, it has brought up a lot of past traumas I have experienced in my life. It feels like I am experiencing most of the traumas all over again. I realize this is completely normal but I feel like I am abnormal. My therapist’s direct supervisor told me last Friday that “feelings are not facts.” Kind of hard to argue with that fact. Having C-PTSD sucks shit but at least I know what to do to help myself. One thing is to read as it helps me get out of my head and focus on something that doesn’t cause emotional pain. Another thing that helps in listening to music as I color. Also doing a mindfulness meditation is quite helpful. Something else that is helping is making sure I eat regularly as well as drinking plenty of water. Drinking plenty of water right now is key as the weather here in Seattle is hot and experiencing a heat wave. Of course my cat, Billie is quite helpful.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottome of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Too Early to Be Awaken on A Saturday Morning

Posted on by Gertie

Good (very early) Morning, World!!! It is very early in the morning here in Seattle. In fact it is 3:06am in the morning Seattle time and I am tired as hell. I think part of the reason I am awake this early is due to a combination of the symptoms of the Depression, Anxiety and PTSD, I struggle with. Thank goodness, I have the support of my cat, Billie to depend on this earlier in the morning. I know I can call people this early in the morning however and thankfully it is not to that point that I will have to rely on my human friends as it is a mild case at the time. Although, Billie my cat is snoring away on my lap as I write this, I am listening to some music. By the sound of it as well as looking out the window, it is currently raining in Seattle which fits my mood of mild depression.

On the plus part I am looking forward to my Amazon deliveries later today which mainly consist of craft supplies of Diamond Art and Latch Hook stuff. Looking forward to the creativity to come once my apartment is clean. I might order more but I want to make sure I am fully awake and have one more bill to pay off.

That’s all I have to say about this particular post. I do want to thank you for reading my very early morning post. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader, read my post as if it was not for you the reader, reading my post, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Thank you again from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Cuddle Time With Cat While Reading

Posted on by Gertie

Good Evening, World!!! I have been home sick today due to vomiting. I slept for a few hours and woke up during early afternoon hours. After waking up from a nap I did some self reflection and realized that part of the reason I was vomiting was due to having a slight bout of depression and some pretty severe PTSD symptoms. With this revelation, I am determined to go into work tomorrow.

On that note, as I mentioned in my last post, I slept for a while. A much needed sleep that helped me feel better with the vomiting as well as the depression and PTSD. Since being up and about in my apartment, I took a shower and ate. Since taking a shower and eating, I have been cuddling with my cat, Billie and reading a book called “Don’t Open The Door.” I’m only on chapter six but it a great book. It is a suspenseful thriller book so far. As much as I love reading with my cat, Billie curled up on my lap, I wish I could be reading outside because the weather in Seattle right now is pretty awesome. It is a perfect sunny day that is 75 degrees Fahrenheit. Reading outside on a day like this is one of my favorite things to do but reading with my cat snuggled in my lap is pretty awesome.

As far as my depression and PTSD goes, I need to get back into the things that I know will help and do them on the regular basis like I used to. The first thing is to go for walks every morning to help my mind in a good place. Secondly, to do a morning mindfulness meditation to put my head in a good peaceful place. Thirdly, to do a mindfulness meditation practice before bed to help rewind from the day. I will restart this tomorrow and I know it works if I do it on the regular basis.

I do not have much more to say in this particular post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you read on my blog. If it wasn’t for you the reader, reading my blog,, I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Fascinating Reading & Time to Go to Bed

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning, World!!! It is now officially Friday morning and it is just after two in the morning Seattle time. Since I am not sure if I informed you all, my schedule changed. I, now work Sunday through Thursday which is why I have had the luxury of staying up this late reading. Reading a book that is fascinating. Fascinating because it is on a subject that I think could help with my recovery as well am maybe helping others if I feel comfortable enough to do it if others would be willing and wanting me to help them is this particular way.

The subject that I am reading about is to help better understand how to do it and incorporate it into my life and hoping other people’s lives are learning to read tarot cards. I feel like what I have been learning thus far can help me in my own daily life to help what direction I would need to go for day to day life but my life being recovery with mental health challenges. I know it may not be a traditional way of going about one’s recovery but recovery is nonlinear. I haven’t slept at all so far tonight just because I have been fascinated by the book I have for beginners of those who want to learn about reading tarot cards. Since I’ve been mainly reading all night, I am realizing I am getting tired and ready to go to bed.

I may be ready for bed and plan to go to bed after I am done writing this particular blog post, I am beyond grateful to have my cat Billie on my lap the majority of the time as I read. His body heat helped keep me warmer even though my heat is on due that the weather in Seattle is absolutely freezing outside. According to a weather app on my phone it is currently twenty three degrees Fahrenheit (-5 Celsius) in my neighborhood of Seattle. With it being so cold I am beyond grateful for my cat, Billie’s body heat to help keep me warm when I turn off the heat as my cat, Billie sleeps under the blankets with me when I go to bed and sleep.

Well, I guess I am not going to end this particular blog post so I can go to bed and sleep since I am tired and full of new fascinating knowledge. Before ending this particular blog post, I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciated from my end of things that you the reader continue to read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog, I would not be continuing to write my blog. Again thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Peace Out, World!!!

Everyday Inspiration, Day 6; The Space to Write

Posted on by Gertie

Finding the right space to write in Seattle can be a bit challenging. I say it is challenging because it all depends on the the time of year. When it comes to late autumn, most if not all of winter and early spring I tend to write inside especially when it comes to blogging. That means my awesome cat, Billie sits by my side or on my lap when I am writing my blog. Occasionally, I do go to the library to blog. During the not so good weather months or what I call the yucky weather months, I tend to do most of my blogging at home so I can get some inspiration especially from my cat, Billie. Occasionally, I also go to a coffee shop to have a London Fog as I people watch as I write my blog. So, during the yucky weather months the blogging part of my writing is done inside especially since I live in Seattle.

Now when it comes to the nice late spring months as well as most of the summer months I tend to blog outside. I tend to go to both Cowen and Ravenna Parks since they not only connected but feels like you are in the middle of nature. It feels like the middle of nature despite being in a middle of a major city of Seattle. Cowen and Ravenna Parks feel like you are in a small forest which is why it feels like you are in the middle of nature. I personally prefer writing outside in nice weather, weather it is blogging or other types of writing.

As you can tell, my writing is dependent on the weather and sometimes my mood if my mental health symptoms are acting up. Mainly it is weather dependent. I love being inspired by writing in different places.

Best Part of Waking Up is Billie in My Lap as I Read

Posted on by Gertie

Good Morning and Happy Saturday, World!!! I slept in this morning which was awesome since I woke up in the middle of the night. It took me about two hours to get back to sleep but on the good note I was able to get back to sleep as well as sleep in.

In fact the best part of this morning was not the sleeping in part part; it was the Billie cuddling up in my lap as I finally chose a holiday book to read. In fact it is a Christmas book I am going to start reading after I am done posting this particular blog post. The book I will be reading is ” Sleigh Bells Riding” by RaeAnne Thayne. I’m not exactly sure what the book is about except it is set during Christmas time. It is going to be one of those days I stay in and read as well as hang out with my wonderful cat, Billie.

The weather is the typical Seattle weather. The ground is wet gut at least it is not raining. Do it’s a damp cold day in Seattle. I might even work on my jigsaw puzzle to today which is in the holiday spirit.

i co not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. Happy Holidays and Peace Out, World!!!

Looking Forward to Laid Back Weekend

Posted on by Gertie

Happy Friday, World!!! It is the day after Thanksgiving which most American call “Black Friday” due to the major sales retailers have for holidays shoppers seeking the perfect gift. Anyway, I have never liked “Black Friday” nor understand why you would want to stand in line hours before the butt crack of dawn.

On that note, I worked this more and am now off and home enjoying the company of my lovely cat, Billie. This is the time of year I pull out my winter and/or holiday jigsaw puzzles and start doing one or two of them. I also pull out a holiday book to read. I already started on one of my holiday jigsaw puzzles. I am not exactly sure what holiday book I will read. I am going to be coloring a holiday poster.

The weather in Seattle today sucks but it is the “normal” Seattle weather. Even though I currently don’t have a holiday book to read, I do have book that I am reading. So, I think I will make some hot tea and curl up in a blanket or two with my cat Billie on my lap as I read.

In fact I think this weekend is going to be a curl up and read type of weekend. Or at least stay in my pajama’s and do puzzles. I love this type of weather sometimes because it gives me an excuse to read, do puzzles, do art and just hang out in my pajama’s with my cat Billie.

I do not have much more to say in this particular blog post. I do want to thank you for reading my blog. It is greatly appreciative from my end of things that you the reader, read my blog. If it was not for you the reader, reading my blog I would not be writing my blog. Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading my blog. Happy Holidays and Peace Out, World!!!